What proportion of your cars actually "work"

[Six-cylinder]

The Milk Float lives on the "other vehicle" list.

Also its needs the load area roof refitted for the stretcher party!

 

 

[DVee8]

100% ,all working ok last time i tried them all,last weekend i think all 3 where running.

[danthecapriman]

75% for me, 3 out of 4 working. Volvo, Mercury And Transit all fully operational. Capri, still in need of putting back together!

But, of the 3 operational ones the Transit is out of MOT which probably won’t change until this stupid pandemic shit is over.

[TrabbieRonnie]

By the op's definition... 88.89%!

One Trabi would require more than a battery to go, and to be fair, the modern is making wheel-bearing noises again... front nearside this time.  Even now, I can't be bothered...

[spike60]

!00%, though I haven't seen one for a month but have a now working Honda in exchange.  Also a Merc 500 I'd rather not use until I get my arse into gear and change the cam chain.

[Tadhg Tiogar]

Somewhere between 50 and 100%. The diesel Borat always works. The CX....well that really depends on what mood she's in, and what's next on the "going wrong" schedule. At the moment I've got suspected HGF with coolant the colour of Bailey's.

[Shep Shepherd]

Both of mine are 100% functional and road legal, as is invariably the case. Not that I have nay reason to drive them at the moment, mind...

[155V6]

1 out of 3.The Puma is fully working & legal.

The MG Express has been off the road for nearly 2 years.The engine has a bad oil leak & a rear caliper was stuck last time I moved it.

The ZR 105 ran out of test & I haven't done anything with it as not sure if I was keeping it or not.

[Shirley Knott]

3/3- What a time to be alive, not that I can bloody drive them anywhere!

[Three Speed]

3/5

Traction, Saab and Chrysler all fully* functional. Herald not so much. Some fool parked the DS in front of the Chrysler though and then took it apart. So whilst it’s driveable I can’t actually drive it until the DS is working. 

[xtriple]

I have a pink shrimp alive and well in my dashboard, a scratch on the drivers side rear quater panel (about an inch long and touched in but still officially there) the discs have gone rusty from sitting around after I washed it, and... that's it! So of one vehicle about 99.9% is working and a shrimp is alive so that sort of counteracts all of that and then some so I'd say: 1 vehicle 102% working.

 

It won't last obviously and the tank is full of fuel and will inevitably 'go off' over the next few months, gum up and the entire fuel system will block or fall apart with E10 and the hoses will rot and the tank (plastic) will deform and fall out of the bottom of the car.

[Tadhg Tiogar]

15 minutes ago, Three Speed said:

.... Some fool parked the DS in front of the Chrysler though and then took it apart. So whilst it’s driveable I can’t actually drive it until the DS is working. 

We know a song about that:

 

[Retr0naut]

7/7. All good.

[TataBobu]

2/4 road legal (not started for two weeks, so unsure otherwise). One utterly fucked (a front wheel flew off the Cielo, put it back but no joy in traction department, so left in a yard some 60 kilometers away) and another one rusted to the point it would be suited for Fred Flintstone traction,but provided some fresh pez and a battery thrown in the mix, it would go under own power. On the same yard as the Cielo.

[Schaefft]

7/9, with the 2 not working being my two Olds Auroras that won't start. The Celsior still needs suspension, as in complete springs that arent more or less missing entirely. It does drive though! The rest starts and drives, Corona just doesn't have any coolant in it. I guess that makes it 6/9 depending on how long it would last...

Now thinking about it, the S-class is only driveable if I smash the window as I locked the key in (have to call the dealer on Monday). It also blocks in the Celsior and Senator, and the rest is not at home. That means that only the 528i is readily available right now...

[Flat4]

50%-ish working, assuming the Granvia has enough charge in the battery to start.

That's 3 out of 6. The Saab is road legal but has split it's radiator, the Almera has benefited from the 6 months MOT extension but needs a new battery, tax and insurance, the other Scooby the Legacy GTV needs either a new clutch, a new engine or both!

Touch wood, Volvo and Forester reliable enough to count on to get to hospital in.

[Doctormop]

Two cars in the household;

Both Hondas, My 2003 Civic and My Wife's 62 plate Jazz

Both fully legal and mechanically sound.*

 

*You expected what??

 

Sorry I know this is Autoshite but we drive Hondas, deal with it!!

[Skut]

1 out of 3 and the one that's legal is about 95% functional. 

[ProgRocker]

Just the one car. I haven't used it since Thursday afternoon so on the assumption that it fires up OK tomorrow - 100%. ? 

[JimH]

Roadworthy and legal to drive on the road? 

1 out of 6.

In my defence it could be 2/6 in a matter of moments but at just right now one car seems like overkill.

[St.Jude]

75% of my cars work.

Out of that 75%: 

one works 80% of the time (Peugeot 107, A/C doesn't work and it likes to let water in after rain).

one works 90% of the time (Toyota Corolla, everything works but there's a knock on the suspension and the aux belt squeals)

one works 90% of the time (Rover 25, it warms up then the idle starts hunting. Plus it likes letting rain come in)

[brownnova]

87% (6/7) are working using the original definition. Just the Yugo in the non working column. Although the MX5 has a puncture and all bar the Saab and C5 are SORN now, but if it was a hospital emergency I’d happily use them. 

[eifion]

Only 1 or 2 out of 4 for me.

The 205 saloon works, but is making worrying noises in neutral and has something up with the clutch or gearbox (and hasn't been started for a month). The 205 van works, but sulked when I tried to start it yesterday. (The starter motor span but wouldn't engage, but was fine after I bump-started it.) The DS is at a Citroen garage with its engine out, waiting for a cylinder head reskim that's on hold for the foreseeable future. The 2CV made it to a 2CV specialist before everything went tits-up and has jumped up their queue as they're not currently getting cars in for M.O.T.s or servicing, which may leave me in the annoying situation in a few weeks of having a car that's all ready for the road that I'm not allowed out to go and pick up.

[GeordieInExile]

100%, I only have the 850 T5 and it was MOT'd just before I got it. I've not had it long enough for things to really go wrong.

[clayts450]

7/7, even the shitbird in the garage.

Batteries on 420/620 need a kick start, mind.

[catsinthewelder]

66%

2/6 Road legal and fairly functional (Focus and 405)

2/6  SORNed and out of MOT but working (Safranne and Dacia)

2/6 Borked (Rover 220 and Disco)

Apart from washing the Safranne I've got nowhere with fleet tinkering yet, utterly hopeless.

[tul66]

6/6 cars all mot'd, 3 on SORN but all good to go.

0/1 bike not Mot'd for last 4 years or so.

[sporty-shite]

In the words of the famous Meat Loaf  " two outta three ain't bad"

Bora: running, full tank of fuel, handling duties beautifully. 

Inca Scene whore: hasn't been used during lockdown, because the Bora is at the top of the drive, and Mrs S hasn't been out. 

Astra: in the garage,waiting for me to change the injector seals (injectors are out) then get the fucked turbo off so I can buy the correct replacement,  although I don't think I'll be getting any bits till after the lockdown. 

[2flags]

Mine is 4 out of five. so that is 80%. The Rover 75 is out of MoT but if all else fails, then pump up the tyres, charge up the battery then it would start. The Landrover, the Jag and the Renault are all good to go. So is the Focus, but that is my school car, so doesn't count.

[jonny69]

I managed to solve a lot of the problems of all my old shite not working by selling all but one of them. I don’t really class my Insight as part of the shite so it doesn’t count. That always works anyway, even when it’s broken, because Honda. 

That leaves the Anglia. Parked up in the garage in September 2018. Battery is off, tyres are flat and fuel has probably evaporated away by now. Would it get me to hospital? Not unless I could get to Halfords and Esso first.