What makes you grin? Antidote to grumpy thread

[somewhatfoolish]

  On 11/05/2019 at 09:41, NorfolkNWeigh said:

Chatting to someone yesterday that's thinking about changing his sensible* car, not everyday , he's got a Golf for that.

<snip>

First World problems X 1000000.

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If he's that well-heeled why not direct him to Richardthestag's Premium Range Rover Pampering Emporium; he's doing a *special on shiny *showroom condition Range Rover Classics.

 

 

*Probably.

[DoctorRetro]

  On 14/05/2019 at 10:07, New POD said:

If you fill them with fluff from your tumble drier (or your belly button), they make great fire lighters for a barbyq or wood burning stove. 

I'm thinking £3 For a pack of ten

How desperate for Money are we? 

 

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Sounds like a plan. We need to get on dragons den with this, could make a fortune.

[hairnet]

Mo's Sig pic on FB @Lord Sterling

Did ya nick that off:

James bond

Tony Hadley

Liberace

Or find it in an 800?

 

Salaam aleikum ?

 

 

[Lord Sterling]

  On 14/05/2019 at 12:01, hairnet said:

Mo's Sig pic on FB @Lord Sterling

Did ya nick that off:

James bond

Tony Hadley

Liberace

Or find it in an 800?

 

Salaam aleikum ?

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Nicked it off Marcus Tandy/ Sonny Crockett. ??

I've actually signed up to social media.

 

[MikeR]

Took the dog out for a walk . he had a dump .. And I found a full roll of gaffer tape lying on the cycle path ...  Win win !

[NorfolkNWeigh]

  On 14/05/2019 at 10:11, somewhatfoolish said:

If he's that well-heeled why not direct him to Richardthestag's Premium Range Rover Pampering Emporium; he's doing a *special on shiny *showroom condition Range Rover Classics.

 

 

*Probably.

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Unfortunately he's taken against Range Rovers ( and Jags) because of the terrible service from our local dealer. He's old enough to have been buying Range Rovers since the very first , he must have owned dozens of them over the years. Plus various family members and Directors of his companies. 

He's the sort of bloke JLR don't want to lose, he's into horseracing , sailing etc , in fact the archetypal RR driver. That now won't give them a penny.

After nearly 50 years of putting up with slapdash BL/ Land Rover quality, you have to wonder how bad things have got. Or maybe it's just that there are alternatives now.

[shedenvy]

  On 11/05/2019 at 10:08, myglaren said:

Never heard of a Bentyaga or Cullinan.

Do they make them purposely ugly to limit sales?

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  On 11/05/2019 at 09:41, NorfolkNWeigh said:

Chatting to someone yesterday that's thinking about changing his sensible* car....

Anyway , his Bentayga ......

Cullinan.....

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*google image searches Bentayga, Cullinan...

 

[andy18s]

  On 14/05/2019 at 13:13, NorfolkNWeigh said:

Unfortunately he's taken against Range Rovers ( and Jags) because of the terrible service from our local dealer. He's old enough to have been buying Range Rovers since the very first , he must have owned dozens of them over the years. Plus various family members and Directors of his companies. 

He's the sort of bloke JLR don't want to lose, he's into horseracing , sailing etc , in fact the archetypal RR driver. That now won't give them a penny.

After nearly 50 years of putting up with slapdash BL/ Land Rover quality, you have to wonder how bad things have got. Or maybe it's just that there are alternatives now.

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Give it 6 months and JLR will be a PSA member....

[Pillock]

  On 14/05/2019 at 13:13, MikeR said:

Took the dog out for a walk . he had a dump .. And I found a full roll of gaffer tape lying on the cycle path ...  Win win !

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Is one of those wins that you've ensured the dog will never need to go out for a poo again?

[Pillock]

  On 14/05/2019 at 16:59, andy18s said:

Give it 6 months and JLR will be a PSA member....

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Mrs_Pillock works in Coventry with a few people still closely entangled in PSA... family members work there etc. They're all convinced that they'll have company Jags soon.

[andy18s]

Some of the Land Rover Facebook pages are going into an apocalyptic meltdown over this,because Pugeuot make unreliable cars....the irony goes completely over their heads 

[Aston Martin]

Not car related and maybe a Hull thing due to our large Polsk population...

 

The factories at 530am are ludicrous. Polsk lasses with painted on jeans, hair done, make-up etc. It's a great morning sight.

But, they're going to be spending 10 hours stuffing plasters into boxes or whatever. 

I have a theory that back home, they tell girls that "Magda Mjuzudhsiazazazazj worked in an English factory, had an affair with the MD, married him and now drives a Mercedes-Benz..... So be slags"

 

If anyone else visits factories I await your confirmations.

[anonymous user]

Very early this morning I was half awake and in the gloom noticed the grim reaper standing looking at me, I wasn't that bothered, but when I woke up a bit more realised it was my dressing gown hanging on the back of the door in a perfect grim reaper outline. Only slightly disappointed, I never get many visitors.

[Lacquer Peel]

  On 15/05/2019 at 08:44, Aston Martin said:

Not car related and maybe a Hull thing due to our large Polsk population...
 
The factories at 530am are ludicrous. Polsk lasses with painted on jeans, hair done, make-up etc. It's a great morning sight.
But, they're going to be spending 10 hours stuffing plasters into boxes or whatever. 
I have a theory that back home, they tell girls that "Magda Mjuzudhsiazazazazj worked in an English factory, had an affair with the MD, married him and now drives a Mercedes-Benz..... So be slags"
 
If anyone else visits factories I await your confirmations.

Yikes.

[paulplom]

Woohoo! And on another note, Jeremy Kyle has been cancelled forever! What are the benefit vacuums gonna do with their monumental amout of free time now?

Sent from my SM-G975F using Tapatalk

[wuvvum]

I was followed most of the way in to work today by a trilbied giffer in a blue Mk3 Mini - he wasn't hanging about, especially on roundabouts.  Got in to Norwich and a separate giffer in a metallic orange late-model Robin nailed it out of a side road in front of me - those things can get off the line pretty quick when they have to.  Then on the way home I encountered a third giffer in another late Robin - silver this time - hammering along the Wroxham road at 60+.  I don't know what they've been putting in the tea at the retirement home, but it's evidently good stuff...

[angle]

On a similar note, I got stuck behind a learner today - in the most immaculate Herald I've ever seen. It even still had its Stanbourne Motors Triumph sticker on the back window. 

[wuvvum]

I got stuck behind a learner yesterday in an Audi A1.  He was going so slowly I eventually got fed up and overtook him.  On my pushbike.

There was a lad round here a couple of years back who was being taught to drive by his Grandad, in Grandad's spotless 1968 Morris Minor.

[strangeangel]

  On 15/05/2019 at 19:06, wuvvum said:

I got stuck behind a learner yesterday in an Audi A1.  He was going so slowly I eventually got fed up and overtook him.  On my pushbike.

 

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That'll have been the automatic one then.

[Zelandeth]

Couple today actually.

[] Discovered that one of my responses to Practical Classics periodic questions to the public on Twitter/Facebook has made it into the latest issue.

[] Took the Invacar for the first trip actually into another corner of town for the first time - and it behaved.  So I took the long way home.

[] Established that it's nowhere close to as much of a liability on the main roads as I expected.

[] Established that she's precisely as easy to drive in stop/start traffic as you'd think.

[] Parked up opposite our local pub to go to the nearby ATM.  Was expecting a bunch of abuse from the huddle of smokers outside...but instead had genuinely happy seeming curiousity and had a pleasant (once I had carefully positioned myself upwind) chat about the car with them.  That was really unexpected.  I usually will walk an extra 3/4 a mile to avoid walking past the place...

[Wack]

  On 11/05/2019 at 09:41, NorfolkNWeigh said:

  On 11/05/2019 at 09:41, NorfolkNWeigh said:

 

The Cayenne, Urus and forthcoming Ferrari and Aston SUVs are all too sporty and will ride like his TR4.

 

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He could buy any one of those and get air suspension put on it if they don't already have it , they might be sporty but they'll have "old man" in the settings

[Wack]

  On 15/05/2019 at 08:44, Aston Martin said:

Not car related and maybe a Hull thing due to our large Polsk population...

 

The factories at 530am are ludicrous. Polsk lasses with painted on jeans, hair done, make-up etc. It's a great morning sight.

But, they're going to be spending 10 hours stuffing plasters into boxes or whatever. 

I have a theory that back home, they tell girls that "Magda Mjuzudhsiazazazazj worked in an English factory, had an affair with the MD, married him and now drives a Mercedes-Benz..... So be slags"

 

If anyone else visits factories I await your confirmations.

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I spend most sunday mornings in the summer at car boot sales and can confirm the Polish women do look fantastic from 5am onwards , lycra sales in the UK must be through the roof since they arrived here because that's the early morning option

[Wack]

Just to add they do look great with fantastic arses but my mates brother shacked up with one and she proper did him over , she ended up costing him over 100k so my advice would be if you want a much younger woman with a great arse , rent one by the hour rather than put 100k into one and regret it 

[Wack]

I came across some vintage magazines from the late 60s

Some things have been around for a long time 

Thankfully some things fade with time 

 

[anonymous user]

I suspect that there are a few on here who could rock that menswear 

[Alex66]

  On 16/05/2019 at 10:25, anonymous user said:

I suspect that there are a few on here who could rock that menswear 

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I would go for the top left trousers in a drainpipe, they rock.

[Wack]

Might go well with the floppy dog ears shirt 

[Stanky]

I demand to see Capt_70s in a floppy dog ears shirt and square-toe rivet shoes next time he fails to proceed in Glasgow rush-hour traffic.

[Sealtainn]

Sat at Cherwell Valley services after driving over 750 miles over the past 26hrs and seeing Chris pull up in this.

What a proud & noble sight it was, I do think that Eau du British Leyland should be a new air freshener. I put my head through the window and the smell took me straight to being 17 and my 1st car, an Austin 1100, loved it ?

[Kiltox]