What makes you grin? Antidote to grumpy thread

[Craig the Princess]

I have seen toddlers being better liars... Not able to talk yet toddlers.

 

https://youtu.be/CBpLWPabYy0

 

 

8:20 onwards is amazing.

Please, please, please warn of Piers Morgan content. Very much not safe for work when I involuntarily call him a snivelling fucking sack of cum.

 

Twice I've heard his fucking voice today, does anyone have a pair of knitting needles to put through my ear drums?

[vulgalour]

 

It amused me, so I did an art.

 

If it gets enough social media then I'll put it in the print shop.

[kinkersaab]

 

tihs must have caused childish sniggers as it passed.... the old wifeys totally oblivious.

[omegod]

Ian's HubNut gathering venue: The Yew Tree Inn.

 

RSVP, Sir Jim.

 

 

* Sorry Ian. I'm sure no BBC employees from the seventies will be attending.

 

I bet that back seat could tell a few tales, dirty old nonce, Imagine finding out your roller used to belong to that horribe twat 

[Cheggers]

I bet that back seat could tell a few tales, dirty old nonce, Imagine finding out your roller used to belong to that horribe twat

I wouldn't be surprised if an ex-Saville Roller is worth more than an equivalent one without the notoriety.

 

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[busmansholiday]

I was quite pleased to see the pollution, I didn't think we had any working chimneys in this country ( the UK) any more.

I was also surprised to hear a lady in one of the many charity shops say to a colleague " It's payday at the steelworks today, people will be collecting stuff we've put to one side"

I didn't know there were any steelworks left , but how poorly paid must they be if they have to wait for payday to buy stuff from a charity shop? I bet once upon a time it was a very well paid job.

 

No diecast in any of the charity shops either!

Apart from Port Talbot, Scunthorpe still makes steel from iron ore, coal, limestone etc. There's electric arc steel making in Rotherham, Newport and at lots of little places.

 

Steel workers generally get paid monthly, used to be 25th with me. Also they got paid the week before Xmas so it's Ben a long month.

 

Don't worry about them being poor in Port Talbot, shift bonus etc adds a third to wages and trust me, some of the production boys are (and were in my day), on far, far more than some managers. Not that in any way pissed me off. At all. Ever...

[fordperv]

beaver bus.jpg

 

tihs must have caused childish sniggers as it passed.... the old wifeys totally oblivious.

The beaver bus is coming and everybody's jumping......

[Cheggers]

I arrived home earlier and pulled onto the driveway just as a well dressed older couple were walking away from the house. I smiled and nodded and was greeted with a couple of very filthy looks.

 

It was only as my daughter explained they were Jehovah's Witnesses that the penny dropped...

 

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[Guest Hooli]

A shitty day weather wise was brightened up by a couple of gems being used

 

A giffer owned sapphire azure

20190130_124934.jpg

 

Then this austin complete with home made number plates

 

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That Austin is fantastic.

[scdan4]

I won a set of winter tyres on wheels for almost no money on fleabay.

 

I’ve never had winter tyres before. They’re fantastic.

[Alfamale]

beaver bus.jpg

 

tihs must have caused childish sniggers as it passed.... the old wifeys totally oblivious.

Sheffield went one better. Remember these from my younger days...

 

[cobblers]

They weren't even subtle with it:

 

[Cavcraft]

Carded my best ever 'wrong skip roulette' last Friday with some miserable twat. Got a full on five minute lecture about 'Do you know it costs us £1,000 a time, blah blah blah' and all that. Tomorrow I'm going back with another 8 black bags and will see if I can sneak them in when he's not about.

[Laseraligningfoofooflanges]

Honda Jizz (L-series engine) doesn't even need* a jack.

 

The car sits high enough to slide my big oil drain bowl under. Oil filter at front. Can access both without removing undertray. Even though sump plug at rear, once you've dealt with any previous overtightening, it'll undo no bother without the jack.

Same with my old typ 44 audi 100.. you can just lay under the fucking thing!

[eddyramrod]

There's an ad running on the tellybox for Expedia.  Book your flights, hotel and car hire in one.  What destination do they show you as a shining example?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Venice.  Right, ok.....

[Tamworthbay]

There's an ad running on the tellybox for Expedia.  Book your flights, hotel and car hire in one.  What destination do they show you as a shining example?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Venice.  Right, ok.....

We did a fly drive to Venice, car hire for two days was cheaper than a transfer and there are quite a few roads around the edges, it’s not quite like the pics you see on tv (well the main tourist bits are). It’s also shit, smells, is totally in existence to rip visitors off and is a crap hole of epic proportions. And that is coming from someone who loves Italy and would happily move to the chaos that is Rome or Naples, but Venice? Nah.

[richardmorris]

I went to venice in 1990 ( in think), twin city holiday to Venice and Florence with Thompson’s I think. Dan dare airways and first class rail transfer. I went with my sister and I was a student with no money. She was a vegetarian and neither of us spoke fluent Italian. Nor realised that you had to book vegetarian meals on the Plane in advance. Made for interesting* holiday. I think it was June and not too hot or smelly - we walked a lot and did a trip out to murano and Burano. The academia etc.

 

The £ collapsed the week we were away too as john major pulled out of the eurozone. I was chasing Eurocheques but thankfully missed the day when it was all up in the stratosphere.

 

That was the first time I’d flown. I’ve been in a plane twice(return) since - once to Marseille and once to burgundy. I’m not keen to repeat the experience.

 

My parents have been to venice a couple of times recently with riviera travel. They really like it.

[SiC]

Snowing in Bristol right now. Meanwhile, somewhere over the pond...

 

Apparently in some parts of the US, antifreeze in the car radiators have been freezing up.

[PhilA]

I have just been given the go-ahead to purchase an engine crane.

 

It's also merely mild here, bordering on chilly.

 

Phil

[myglaren]

 

It amused me, so I did an art.

2019-22.jpg

 

If it gets enough social media then I'll put it in the print shop.

 

Is that Kate Beckinsale in the horse?

[AlabamaShrimp]

I arrived home earlier and pulled onto the driveway just as a well dressed older couple were walking away from the house. I smiled and nodded and was greeted with a couple of very filthy looks.

 

It was only as my daughter explained they were Jehovah's Witnesses that the penny dropped...

 

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That they thought that spoiler was a bit shit too?

[Exiled_Tat_Gatherer]

Is that Kate Beckinsale in the horse?

 

I'd love it to be true - but somehow I know she's in hospital with a burst ovarian cyst…. no idea why that showbiz trivia stuck in my head. Couple of days back...…….

ANYWAY - MASSIVE ATTACK gig last night - met a fantastic looking local blonde...…. turned a semi-dull gig into a pretty good night.

[willswitchengage]

AS in the community

 

We were told to not come in to work today (hooray!) due to the weather so I spent the morning helping to budge cars stuck at the bottom of the hill at the end of our cul de sac.

 

I had an old pair of unused tyre socks which I sold to this chap who was desperate to get going - they worked remarkably well.

 

 

They didn't fit the larger super sports Fiesta which was next in the queue so I instead donated the old rags that live in the back of my car. It was tedious using them but it did ultimately work. The car's traction control or whatever was somewhat hilarious as expected.

 

 

Predictably by lunchtime though everything is back to normal.

[Exiled_Tat_Gatherer]

It may sound warped - but I do have a giggle at drivers exploits trying to get up/down and around in these conditions. I also do like to help out and it's a weird - cracked it - feeling when you help them get going….

I was just clearing the car this morning as a Volvo V50?60? went sliding past me on the hill opposite my place. I'll be very surprised if he made it to work in one piece the way he was slamming the anchors on and panicking.

[bramz7]

I can see a Maestro from the window of my gym.

[MikeR]

it started snowing whilst I was at work , then someone went sick ...and I got a phone call

 

would I do a extra sleep in , having just read the weather reports , "yes" slipped from my lips ...

 

I looked at my car on Wednesday morning as I walked to the kitchen .....and read about the chaos outside on my phone

 

 

and this morning it started first turn ...no ice to scrape off and a sunny drive home , even the rock has been moved that I hit before Xmas

 

and now I have just managed to loosen off and tighten all 4 nuts and bolt on the manifold ready to replace it ... the 13mm was a right bar steward , even wrecked my new long reach 13mm from china , it just split open !! , why one 13mm  nut ?????

 

I shall now take the dog for a walk who likes the new type of food I have just got him  

[Andyrew]

Washing the disco in the snow, wrapped up and a bucket of warm water. Simple pleasures.

 

[Floatylight]

Shouldn't laugh but......

 

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[oldcars]

There's an ad running on the tellybox for Expedia.  Book your flights, hotel and car hire in one.  What destination do they show you as a shining example?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Venice.  Right, ok.....

Also the child running onto the low balcony  Everyone is so hot on holiday health and safety now, didn't think that was the best image to show either.

[Skizzer]

My XJ-S is back.

 

Brakes work. Steering works. Suspension works. Engine runs as it should.

 

Now I get what all the fuss is about.

 

Proper update over the weekend. Here’s an old photo of it in the meantime.