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Most stupid message while flogging a shiter


Alan Prost

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I tried selling my old 406 on bumtree.

Got a random African sounding geezer ring me up asking what fucking train he needed to get to come and see it. That was what he actually asked.

 

What train do  I need to get.

 

Turns out the silly cunt lived in London, or "lived in London" depending on your level of cynicism.

I sold it locally in the end, to a bloke who actually lived in my town and gave me money.

 

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6 minutes ago, loserone said:

I got lots of that type with my 406.  Lots asking for FSH too..  In the end I sold it to someone who gave a deposit and booked 8 hours of train travel in the midst of a pandemic.

I did a bit of servicing on mine.

I had a young lad turn up ask for the service history, pointed to no dealer stamps for a couple of services. Then turn his nose up at it having wheel trims. Yes it's an LX, it didn't have alloys originally.

Did you not look at the pictures?! Besides, it £700 you could buy some from a scrap yard!

He did however completely miss the rust blister on the bonnet lip above one of the headlamps though.

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I sold a Volvo S40 on eBay.  Buyer was based in London but hailed from east of Ipswich.  I sent him a message after the end of the auction saying "thanks for bidding, let me know when you want to collect so we can make the necessary arrangements".  Next day, sat at my desk at work about 2 in the afternoon, my 'phone rings and it's the buyer - "I'm at Norwich station".  FFS.  I told him he'd have to find something to do for the next three hours until I could knock off.  He was fine with it to be fair, but what an odd way to go about things!

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3 minutes ago, wuvvum said:

I sold a Volvo S40 on eBay.  Buyer was based in London but hailed from east of Ipswich.  I sent him a message after the end of the auction saying "thanks for bidding, let me know when you want to collect so we can make the necessary arrangements".  Next day, sat at my desk at work about 2 in the afternoon, my 'phone rings and it's the buyer - "I'm at Norwich station".  FFS.  I told him he'd have to find something to do for the next three hours until I could knock off.  He was fine with it to be fair, but what an odd way to go about things!

 

You should have said I'm in London.

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33 minutes ago, iainrcz said:

I did a bit of servicing on mine.

I had a young lad turn up ask for the service history, pointed to no dealer stamps for a couple of services. Then turn his nose up at it having wheel trims. Yes it's an LX, it didn't have alloys originally.

Did you not look at the pictures?! Besides, it £700 you could buy some from a scrap yard!

He did however completely miss the rust blister on the bonnet lip above one of the headlamps though.

What planet are some people on? FSH on a £700 car?!?

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'Will you take £XXXX for the car'

No.

'Can I view it?'

Yes.

(Travels probably 1.5 hours to view car)

'Will you take £XXXX* for the car?'

No.

(Travels back probably 1.5 hours without car)

 

*The same offer he made and got knocked back before he came to view.

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38 minutes ago, iainrcz said:

To be fair, I've only ever been on one train journey myself. When I was about 8, with my Nan from Cleethorpes to Grimsby 😄

Really? 

Wow. 

In 2005, whilst selling a mk2 cav cdi auto in the auto trader when it was in print. I had a phone call from a Rasta from Toxteth.  Now there's a train every 15 mins from.Hunts Cross past the dingle,  through Liverpool and up the miseryrail northern line to Formby and beyond.  Dead cheap, dead reliable.  

I said, phone me when you get on the train, and I'll meet you at the station. 

Give me your address. I might get a mate to bring me.

Okay, but i won't get home from.work.before 6pm

He got a fucking black cab. 18 miles from Toxteth. Got the cab driver to test drive it for him, and then offered me less than the price of his fancy trainers.  I eventually sold it to him at a reasonable price, but he defo put a fake name on the V5 which he wanted   to send off himself (yeah bollacks to that scam) and it was never taxed again. 

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Actually, I tell a lie.

I once got a train from somewhere in Sheffield, to somewhere else in Sheffield to see Iron Maiden.

Though I did ask the wife if I've ever been on one with her to glean that information.

In my defence, in my mind that had been a tram. Clearly not.

 

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10 minutes ago, goosey said:

Facebook Market Place, random guy messaged me about my Merc ML that was advertised for £2000

WHY YOU SELLING ML ????

because I’ve bought another car 

CUT THE SHIT WHATS RONG WITH IT ???

nothing I’ve just bought another car 

IM A MEKANIC DONT FUCK WIT ME IF THERES SOMETHING RONG WIT IT I DO NOT LIKE HAVING MY TIME WASTED !!!!!

You will have to have a look and decide for yourself, the car is spot on 

IL GIVE YOU ADDRESS TO DRIVE IT TO IL PAY YOU £800 CASH TONIGHT 

no thanks 

FUKIN TIMWASTER !!!!

I sold it on gumtree for £ 1700 in the end

That conversation went on significantly longer than it would have done were I selling something.

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Facebook Market Place, random guy messaged me about my Merc ML that was advertised for £2000
WHY YOU SELLING ML ????
because I’ve bought another car 
CUT THE SHIT WHATS RONG WITH IT ???
nothing I’ve just bought another car 
IM A MEKANIC DONT FUCK WIT ME IF THERES SOMETHING RONG WIT IT I DO NOT LIKE HAVING MY TIME WASTED !!!!!
You will have to have a look and decide for yourself, the car is spot on 
IL GIVE YOU ADDRESS TO DRIVE IT TO IL PAY YOU £800 CASH TONIGHT 
no thanks 
FUKIN TIMWASTER !!!!
 
I sold it on gumtree for £ 1700 in the end 
 
 
 

 
He would hav got FUCK OFF DICKHEAD, after the 2nd message then blocked after the third.

Sent from my SM-T585 using Tapatalk

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The weirdest one I had was selling a broken 125cc motorbike which I had perhaps foolishly said I might be able to deliver.  It was on eBay and a guy up in Telford wanted me to take it up without viewing it first.  Sensing trouble I said no, get the train down and I'll pick you up from the station and if you buy it you can help me load it into my VW camper.  The unexpected reply was that he was a wheelchair user after his last bike crash so wouldn't be able to help me load.  I eventually convinced him to get a lift down.  When his dad arrived with him he was offering me money not to sell it to him but I really needed it gone so after some considerable fanning about it was loaded and gone. 

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One issue with gumtree is that auto filled message “hi is this still available?” Or something like that- I ended up with about 20 of those on a golf I had on there with nothing back after I said it was. I see on a few ads it says yes still available I’ll remove it when it isn’t- And I think I’ll post the same in future to avoid a load of pointless replies I had to make.

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12 hours ago, Daviemck2006 said:

I got a full service history on the £500 bora!

Sent from my SM-T585 using Tapatalk
 

On the whole though it’s a ‘nice to have’ on a £700 car it’s by no means a bargaining point. Some of the best cars I’ve had have had literally just the V5 and a key, some of the biggest piles of shit had a sheaf if paperwork. 

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12 hours ago, Talbot said:

That conversation went on significantly longer than it would have done were I selling something.

A mechanic who can’t even spell his own profession...

The ‘best price’ bollocks does my head in, it immediately gets someone’s back up because the usual format is agree a ‘best price’ on the phone of 50% of what your asking then chip it down even further when they arrive. It’s a technique that probably works in a Market in Marrakesh bartering aggressively for 40 minutes but we’re talking about a car here not a fake Michael Kors handbag. I don’t sell cars any more but when I did as soon as the ‘best price’ shit started coming out I gave radio silence. 

Also another trick by the sub human pondlife that frequents Gumtree is asking for a discount because they’ve had to travel. On that basis then if I saw a Mercedes Maybach for sale in the Netherlands would they give it me for free as I’d had to go out of my way?

Had one years ago, made a £40 round taxi fayre from the other side of town on a £400 car, arrived with his mate who looked like he was on spice. Complained the parcel shelf was missing and the bumper wasn’t a perfect match. Then arrived at his ‘valuation’ of £100 or something equally nuts. Got told to fuck off then got a taxi fayre back to Bartertown or wherever the fuck he was from. After that I made the decision for my own sanity to scrap the fuckers once I’d finished with them. 

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