The grumpy thread

[chaseracer]

Forgot it was the Citroen Car Club Midlands rally today. Hope Mr D Wobbler takes lots of pics...

[Lankytim]

I had some guy come round today to have a look at the Citroen AX I have for sale, His son is learning how to drive and needed a cheap set of insurance friendly wheels

 

First of all, he turned up an hour and a half late, which is never a good start, but there you go. His son seems like a nice enough fella and was dead keen about the AX, then the aggro with his dad starts.

 

 

The car is perfect, BUT....

 

"It's been towed behind a campervan, that's no good at all", -   Well, much of the mileage has been done with the engine off while it's being towed, anyway it's £200 so what do you want, it's a cheap honest motor.

 

"The exhaust is rusty, another month and it will be hanging off"-      It's not blowing and it's not too rusty, it will last ages! If it had a brand new exhaust on it it would be up for more than £200.

 

"The engine is all oily, it's been thrashed. I'm an expert on these cars and it's going to need a complete rebuild within weeks"-    The engine is lovely and quiet, it's sweet as a nut, the oil is from a rocker gasket.

 

"Oh, look at this, the oil on the dipstick is low, that's really really bad, the engine is on it's last legs"-      This obviously isn't the car for you, I suggest you get a grand together and find a different car to look at, if the engine is that bad i'll just weigh it in.

 

"My mate weighed one of these in last week for £120, it was much better than this too"-         Why didn't you buy that one then?

 

"Will you take £150" -  No, £175

"£160"- No £175

£170"- No, £175

 

By now it's clear that this guy is a massive twat, and he's more trouble than he's worth. Even if we do strike a deal, he's no doubt moan about a dint he didn't notice or the rear axle is about to fall off e.t.c I'm desperate to fook him off into his car and off my drive

 

"175 is alot of money to spend on a car"-     You obviously arent satisfied with this car, so you need to go and spend some more money on a car without faults, like I said before £1000 should do. Goodbye

 

It took all of my self control not to go to the shed, grab a spade and smash the fook out of it infront of him.

 

Instead I shut the bonnet and go back into the house for a sit down. Why do cheap cars attract such fucking twats?

 

 

This thing is getting pressed next week unless someone wants to give me £150 for it soon.

[ruffgeezer]

Tim, where are you? I am getting similarly pissed off with the amount of twats the ax vts has attracted, it's a very clean shell but I think I'd sell it easier as a standard car instead.

 

What engine is it/ miles etc?

[Lankytim]

I'm in Stoke on Trent, 1 litre 3 door 100k on the clock, but as mentioned it's spent much of it's time behind a camper.

 

It's in really good shape overall!

[ruffgeezer]

Gah, why couldn't you have said it's in shit shape? I hate breaking cars that don't deserve it!

What I could do with is a car that old granny cataracts has biffed into the trolley park whilst having her 5th attempt at leaving Tesco's carpark.

[Lankytim]

I can go and smash it up a bit if you like?

[RedSparrow]

It's best not selling to a bloke like that even if he offered you the asking price.
He'd be on the phone within a week trying to get you to pay for any repairs. I think you were very restrained and polite!

[ruffgeezer]

Only if I get to come and lowball on the price once you've done it!

[Lankytim]

LOL, you can lowball me all you like, i'll just keep repeating the number 175 over and over again before locking the car and going inside the house.

 

You may as well use it as a donor for yours, i'm only going to break a few bits off it and weigh it in.

[Cavcraft]

It's a bloody ace car that AX and worth every penny. Bargain basement cars mostly attract the kind of spectacular tit who wants everything for nothing and has watched to much telly. They sit there watching Mike Brewer and countless other similar programmes where offers are made and assume they can just make stupid fucking offers as they have cash or whatever.

 

Happily, these back-to-fronts often get short shrift and rightly so. Your idea of smashing it up in front of someone is a cracker, I really will have to do that one day, then chase the fuckers off with the axe/shovel/BFO hammer that was used to wreck the car.

[Lankytim]

The more I think about it the more I feel I should have just done it, "This car is obviously a danger to human life, thanks for pointing out all its faults and faults it's likely to have in the future" then just smash the windscreen with a lump hammer.

 

The fat shit even saw the XM parked behind the AX and said, "Ahh, a Xantia". From that moment on I could see there was NO DEAL to be had with this fella.

.

He was just one of life's know it all, big-I-am, bar room expert tosspots. "Don't worry son, watch me knock this guy down on price"

[RedSparrow]

The guys son was probably embarassed by him.

[autofive]

in that situation i would ignore the father and speak directly to the son

 

"do you want it for 175? yes or no?"

[cobblers]

"watch this lad, I'll show you how to buy a car"

[outlaw118]

As if by magic, I have had an ebay question regarding The Moose.

  Quote

 

Im a little confused Bob? Its an old motor, seen better days with war wounds all over the place, needing work for water loss and to top it a CAT C? I was gonna fix it with gaffa tape and tie wraps and take it on a rally around Europe through France, Italy, Germany where it would have done the Norbourgring, Switzerland, driving towards The Pamplona Bull Run (yes ill be legging it!!) and then scrap it raising enough cash to fly back from Bilbao? What is your reserve for this fine piece of machinery then???

Do I really want to know that basically you're going to thrash the bollocks off it, then scrap it, when with a little bit of TLC she'll be worth over a grand? (I could be RONG obv). He's been outbid now anyway, hopefully he'll just FOAD.

[Cavcraft]

If he's going near the bull run then I hope he gets trampled by one.

[outlaw118]

I know it's his money etc etc.... but what a wankhammer.

[TimothyClaypole]

PC is acting up, nice squares on the display like colour clash on a ZX Spectrum, which Google searches reckon is a drive fault - been working months with the same driver, I'd always have said it was a memory on the card fault myself.

 

Gave me a kick up the arse to fit the new power supply I bought months ago to try and cure a capacitor squeal I've had pretty much since I built it, appears to have fixed that but the card is still acting up when it wants and shutting the pc down.  

[Brent_Crude]

Throughly hacked off and my hands are shredded with fibreglass nicks (from the headlining) after a frustrating afternoon yesterday trying to get the old Range Rover's rear wiper working. Never did get it going and then the sunroof went on the blink and it decided to start doing its annoying 'stall while reversing' trick. I treated it to a good clean and polish and this is how it repays me - bastarding thing! It doesn't seem to matter how much time I spend on it, the 'to do' list only seems to get bigger. At least it goes forwards well, I suppose.    

[beko1987]

Sitting here at work doing data checking, which I've put off for a few weeks. It was correct, and now it's fucking miles out. The person who gave me the task came back from a 3 week holiday today so pointless asking her, and cba to ask anyone else. Can't get how something 'untouched' can fuck itself up, I imagine it has been touched and is now fucked.

 

Got LHM to go in the XM, and parts on the way to fix the slow coolant leak but havent got a spare weekend to do anything to the poor unloved thing!

 

 

Grrrrrr, rolly time

[SambaS]

Can someone with a traders policy put my car on it for a couple of weeks? My driving other cars extension only covers cars that are on the MID.. already spent £25 on day cover and need to TAX it!!! Pleasey please.

 

If anyone can help probably best to PM Thank you.

[chaseracer]

  On 01/09/2013 at 19:34, RedSparrow said:

It's best not selling to a bloke like that even if he offered you the asking price.

He'd be on the phone within a week trying to get you to pay for any repairs. I think you were very restrained and polite!

Quite...

 

[Cavcraft]

Samba: You'll need to be careful with that one. People with 'ordinary' insurance aren't as a rule allowed to drive cars belong to people with trade insurance. I often get asked to lend people cars because their insurance covers them for covered (with someone else) cars (if that makes sense, but when they check with their insurance they won't allow it because it's on a trade policy.

 

Ps: getting tax is a nuisance, too. Some P.O's would tax cars not in my name but they won't do it now and even the DVLA office who always used to do so won't let me now, unless I put the green slip in my name.

[philibusmo]

I have not been ill this year and as a rule am very rarely ill. So why oh why do i have to come down with something now, in the middle of 4 dry and windless days where i could be welding and 2 days before I am due to drive from Devon to Gdansk in Poland. Bad timing hardly begins to cover it.

[cobblers]

MOT test on the daily golf was aborted due to it being too low to slide the jack under once it was on the ramps. FFS just drive it on a bit of wood like I do every time I jack it up!

My mums completely bone stock MX5 was exactly the same on the same ramp but he wasn't funny about that since it's not modified and just used a scissor jack to get it high enough to jack properly.

On top of that grump, my van is STILL here waiting for the dumbarse painter to take it. FFS!

[meggersdog]

So my phone skidaddled across the centre console and into the passenger's side footwell somewhere.Not to worry I'll retrieve it when I get home.I parked up and opened the passenger door but couldn't see the phone.Must be under the seat so just as I lift the seat Kerunch,yep metal and screen connect,the thing is wedged into the lifting mechanism and is now fooked.I've got things for sale too with only my mobile number listed...Bugger, can't get another phone until tomorrow as Tesco now only sell their own pay as you go phones.

Oh, and that occasional clonk from the rear silencer is not a broken rubber mount but even though there's smoke coming out the back the exhaust has snapped right after the first silencer.These old Discoveries don't sound much louder with no exhaust.

[SambaS]

Okay thanks Cavette, I will put the question to my insurers. This is annoying as last year they wrote to me to say the car didn't need ANY insurance at all. Loop hole closed

 

All I really want to do is TAX it to make it more sell-able and drive it to my Mum's as it's a nicer area and sell it from there.

 

I guess another £25 on day insurance... my profit is going to be nil if I'm not careful!

 

It's already in the garage having timing chain fitted £89 in parts, £150 in labour, and a clunky steering diagnosed and fixed, which is the rack or the ARB bushes.

 

I'm counting on this car clearing my rent arreers.... Should really be going towards a YB Cosworth engine but there you go!

[beko1987]

Missus has just watched tonights shitenders. Poor fucking rover, looked like it drove alright!

[Ghosty]

Did you have to bring that up?

 

(Junkman: don't read the post above).

[vulgalour]

It's no use, I have to set fire to the house.  Animals and house have been repeatedly flea treated, or so I've been told while I was away.  Parents have gone away for a fortnight on my return which I didn't really have notice of (again) and it would appear the house and the poor old dog have got fleas again.  Visitors have commented on the ankle bites they get, I'm getting ankle bites and the dog is getting no respite from it.

 

So yay... I have to deflea the house and dog or something.  What a ballache.  Why is it being so bad for fleas this year?  Our neighbours are also having the same issues with their house and pets.