The grumpy thread

[gearoil]

Parking at the NEC.

 

That shit they call food at the NEC.

[retrogeezer]

ebay halfwits

 

I advertise some items and state in the advert cheque preferred. Then send them the invoice stating cheque required.

So half the f**kwits can't read and pay by that other ebay company called paypay.

Fu**king dozy twunts - ffs don't they read the advert and the invoice.

If I buy off ebay I look at terms & conditions and how they want to be paid. Not these mouth breathing scum I'm dealing with. Tossers

 

and takes another gulp of whisky to steady the nerves

 

err, ebays terms & conditions state you MUST offer paypal as a payment option - even if it is collection only. That way the buyer is 'protected'

 

It's shite and thats why most people that made ebay the company it is no longer use it for selling stuff.

[Guest]

Work.

 

Customers calling work with TVs fucking BLARING in the background. Are you profoundly deaf? Why do you have to have your TV up so loud? I can't hear a fucking word you're saying!

 

Also, if a store isn't answering the phone, it's not my fault. I don't care how important you think you are. If I can't get you through I can't get you through.

 

Nob ends.

[trigger]

Welcome back Wat!

[Guest]

Fuck's sake, TURN YOUR FUCKING TELLY DOWN!Aaaaaaaaaaaaarghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

 

Oh, and by the way, if you've dropped a book on your telly, it's accidental damage and we're not giving you a new one. Why is that so bloody hard to understand?

[ashmicro]

Fuck's sake, TURN YOUR FUCKING TELLY DOWN!Aaaaaaaaaaaaarghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

 

Oh, and by the way, if you've dropped a book on your telly, it's accidental damage and we're not giving you a new one. Why is that so bloody hard to understand?

 

 

Hahhahhaha! Welcome back, Wat! The same thing used to happen to me all the time when I was in the Civil Service. "I'm calling about DLA for Mr AND ON TODAY'S THIS MORNING WE HAVE PHIL VICKERY AND A CHANCE TO WIN FOUR POUNDS and he hasn't got his money for 6 weeks OOOOOOOO BODYFORM BODYFORM FOR YOUUUUU

[sporty-shite]

Work.

 

Customers calling work with TVs fucking BLARING in the background. Are you profoundly deaf? Why do you have to have your TV up so loud? I can't hear a fucking word you're saying!

 

Also, if a store isn't answering the phone, it's not my fault. I don't care how important you think you are. If I can't get you through I can't get you through.

 

Nob ends.

 

 

Yes, welcome back, Sir Wat. I've missed you!

 

On the subject of halfwit punters, do you get many of those calls where the husband makes the wife phone up, then sits in the background saying "Ask him xxxx", then gets irritable because she hasn't got the intelligence to convey the answer, and he hasn't got the social skills to use the phone.

 

Used to get loads of these when I worked in rental, and they were nearly all from Wiganers. Fucking pie-eating Luddites.

[Cavcraft]

Someone should employ Wat as the Minister for anti-twattery. He'd have Britain great again in no time.

[Guest]

Someone should employ Wat as the Minister for anti-twattery. He'd have Britain great again in no time.

 

Speaking of anti-twats, has Mark picked up his new purchase yet? THE MINISTER DEMANDS TO KNOW (and will probably end up leaving office in disgrace after an ill informed expenses scandal involving a C reg Piazza and several yards of crushed velvet curtains).

[Lord Sterling]

Ebay sellers: Bought some mats, paid, then suddenly received a an email from the seller stating that his wife had thrown the mats away Now come on, it shouldnt be difficult to tell your wife that you are selling the mats on ebay is it?

 

Wat's rants remind me of when I used to work at my mates garage last year. I had a never ending mountain of mongs phoning up and moaning that they wanted thier car booked in the garage, seen to and repaired the same hour, if they didnt get what they wanted cue dummy spitting marathon and the usual tired excuse that they "know" the boss, my answer would be a simple 'so what? I know him aswell' Customers who got arsey would be automatically of "low" priority. Its amazing the amount of of people who try and tell you what your job is and what you should do.

[ProgRocker]

Work.

 

Customers calling work with TVs fucking BLARING in the background. Are you profoundly deaf? Why do you have to have your TV up so loud? I can't hear a fucking word you're saying!

 

Also, if a store isn't answering the phone, it's not my fault. I don't care how important you think you are. If I can't get you through I can't get you through.

 

Nob ends.

 

You have my sympathy, Watanabe. I have done a few outbound call centre jobs (masqueraded as 'office work' when I applied for the jobs) in the past and I hated it.

 

I remember trying to call a customer about a mortgage application. I called the mobile number beginning with '07' and ended up speaking to some total cretin who was not been right in the head and was really angry that I disturbed him/her (gruff voice - didn't even know what sex the person was that I was talking to!

 

Me: "Hello, could speak to Mr..... , please?"

"This is a mobile number!" (Errr...yes the '07' at the start of the number gave it away ) "Why are you calling me?" "How did you get my number?" Rant rant rant...

 

I wanted to say: "For fucks sake, if its a wrong number than just say so, you dozy fucker!"

I never actually established if the person I spoke to was the person I actually wanted to speak to. Wish I put my phone down on the cunt earlier!

 

I eventually got sacked from that job for 'not hitting call targets' but I couldn't say that I was deeply upset about it.

[Cavcraft]

I shall let him tell you himself sir. However a fancy luxury car, some OMG SLIDIN ACTION on a North Wales roundabout and comedy overtaking attempts at the A41/M53 interface were all to be enjoyed this morning. As was the distinct aroma of pez.

[Angrydicky]

I shall let him tell you himself sir. However a fancy luxury car, some OMG SLIDIN ACTION on a North Wales roundabout and comedy overtaking attempts at the A41/M53 interface were all to be enjoyed this morning. As was the distinct aroma of pez.

 

You took the Merc?

 

So what's the new purchase then?

[sporty-shite]

I shall let him tell you himself sir. However a fancy luxury car, some OMG SLIDIN ACTION on a North Wales roundabout and comedy overtaking attempts at the A41/M53 interface were all to be enjoyed this morning. As was the distinct aroma of pez.

 

I suspect Lord Pete of M was involved...............

[Albert Ross]

Before my job title changed, I had to answer the workshop phone with a length of spiel that included the name of the company I work for, the precise department, and also the name of the vehicle manufacturer we are the agents for.

I had a phone call just after I started (one of many similar) which went thus.

 

Me. "Good Morning, Perrys Vauxhall Masterfit, (insert name here) speaking, how can I help?"

Mong. (Lazy "male grooming type/bottle of SOL with a lemon in it" voice) "Is that BMW?"

Me. "No, it's Perrys Vauxhall".

Mong. "Well can you put me through to BMW please?"

Me. "No, they are a different company."

Mong. "Well they are only over the road from you."

Me. "Well they are a different company to us, with a different phone line."

Mong. "But you're all on the same road, and you all sell cars!"

Me. "But we are a different company."

Mong. "How much is a service for a 3 series?"

Me. "You need to ring BMW."

Mong. "I thought I had?"

Me. "No, you rang the number with 800 at the end, which is us, at Vauxhall, BMW are 500 at the end."

Mong. "Are you telling me I rang the wrong number?"

Me. "Yes Sir...................."

Mong. "I don't like your tone!"

Me. Good day to you Sir, remember, it ends in 500!"

Click.

 

 

Another call.

 

Me. "Spiel"

Mong. (Angry businessman type voice) "What's the number of your Sheffield branch?"

Me. "We don't have a Sheffield branch."

Mong. "You do. I can see it from my office here, over the road" !!!!

Me. "Perrys don't have a Sheffield branch."

Mong. "I know that, but it's still Vauxhall!"

Me. "But it's not Perrys."

Mong. "Does that matter??!! I want their number!"

Me. "I don't have the numbers for other companies here Sir, I just have the numbers for Perrys."

Mong. "What do you mean by that?"

Me. "Well it's like ringing Tescos to ask them to put you through to Asda. Have you considered going across the road to speak to someone?"

Mong. "Click..... Bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz"

 

Haha! I hate telephones, customers and cars. If it weren't for them I could get so much more work done.

 

Another one was a customer that kept ringing every half an hour for progress reports.

I told him after the 4th time to leave us alone, as for me to keep answering the phone meant I had to stop work on his car, which would delay it sufficiently for it to be ready tomorrow instead. I got a roasting in the office for that one.............. I was "rather rude" to the customer. Apparently. Not as fucking rude as I had wanted to be.

[dollywobbler]

Part of working in the classic media seems to be providing a Directory Enquiries service for people who don't know how an internet works. However, I've never had to deal with some of the crap dealt out in this thread! I did do IT Support in a Call Centre and that was enough to make sure I avoided ever working in one. I try to keep my temper with call centre people as they're managed down to the minute and are in no way responsible for the huge call queue/hideous hold music that makes me stabby/stupid 'press 4 for a long wait' stuff.

 

I don't hold back for cold-call sales folk though. Sorry but really, just piss off! Especially as I shut the business down almost four years ago!

[chaseracer]

Part of working in the classic media seems to be providing a Directory Enquiries service...

Ian, do you have the number for 2CVGB?

 

CHZ M8 K THX BAI...

 

[hennabm]

ebay halfwits

 

I advertise some items and state in the advert cheque preferred. Then send them the invoice stating cheque required.

So half the f**kwits can't read and pay by that other ebay company called paypay.

Fu**king dozy twunts - ffs don't they read the advert and the invoice.

If I buy off ebay I look at terms & conditions and how they want to be paid. Not these mouth breathing scum I'm dealing with. Tossers

 

and takes another gulp of whisky to steady the nerves

 

err, ebays terms & conditions state you MUST offer paypal as a payment option - even if it is collection only. That way the buyer is 'protected'

 

It's shite and thats why most people that made ebay the company it is no longer use it for selling stuff.

 

Yes it is a closed shop between egay and paypal, so that you must offer it. It doesn't mean to say that you have to use it. As egay is not a business to me (just a way of shifting stuff) then why should I pay paypal AND egay for their services.

 

In future I will increase the postage to account for the losses to paypal and egay.

 

I agree it is shite.

 

egay Twunts

[wuvvum]

I can't believe nobody's brought a massive anti-trust lawsuit against eBay yet. There's millions to be made.

[Cavcraft]

Ah but then someone complains to them and they pull your listings or suspend your account. That's why they stopped all those users selling fifty quid items for 99p and £49 postage years back. It was actually because eBay couldn't make money off postage costs. Not only that but whoever does the cheapest or free postage gets their items at the top of the search pages. Never understood why they haven't been taken to the cleaners by the monopolies commission for insisting on Paypal for new or seldom sellers. Hey if you ever want annoying phone calls from wankers try running a recovery truck. 3.00am on Sunday calls were quite frequent from someone you didn't know who's got your number off a met and expected you to an 80 mike round trip for £19 and they 'haven't got the money on them but will see you right sometime'. Most were told to piss off then I'd turn my phone off. Some of the answerphone messages you'd get the next day were class!

[Pete-M]

I shall let him tell you himself sir. However a fancy luxury car, some OMG SLIDIN ACTION on a North Wales roundabout and comedy overtaking attempts at the A41/M53 interface were all to be enjoyed this morning. As was the distinct aroma of pez.

 

I suspect Lord Pete of M was involved...............

 

Indeed, although I dunno why this is in the grumpy thread.

[sporty-shite]

I shall let him tell you himself sir. However a fancy luxury car, some OMG SLIDIN ACTION on a North Wales roundabout and comedy overtaking attempts at the A41/M53 interface were all to be enjoyed this morning. As was the distinct aroma of pez.

 

I suspect Lord Pete of M was involved...............

 

Indeed, although I dunno why this is in the grumpy thread.

 

No, me neither. Maybe the inclusion of happiness in the grumpy thread should make me grumpy, just so I can have a grump about it in the grumpy thread. Or something.

[pogweasel]

Moar eBay shit.

 

Bloke advertises item with postage at £7, sounds OK, so I bid & win. Except then he says he wants £15 p&p, so I tell him to jog on.

 

He then files for NPB and I have to cough up to pay for the item (no postage) which I obvously then won't get, rather then a cancel transaction.

 

So he gets a neg, as is pretty much fair in the circumstances.

 

He then uses another account (registered to the same name and address, smart!! ) to bid & buy one of my bits and leave a stinking retaliation, even though he somehow got the one I laid for him removed.

 

Very frustrated as now I can't buy any shit & will probably get lobbed off selling for "non-performance" or some other spurious shit.

[Minimad5]

Anti-twats ?

I've wrote a little bit in "Congraulations" thread - Thanks for making that thread Wat'

 

Think i've been put off eBay due to everyones experiences

[Lord Sterling]

MORE FUCKING ROAD RAGE!!!!!!

 

WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG with people. Twice today this has happend. Other drivers thinking they can push me out of the way because I drive a MICRA.

 

1. I'm bimbling down a residential road minding my own business, cars are parked on the right-hand side of the road, so my lane is clear and I have priority over any car that comes towards me. A Passat appears on my side of the road, there is plenty of space between [arked cars for the Passat to move in and wait for me to pass, but it doesnt, it continues on until we meet almost head on. Both our cars come to a stop. The Passat obviously thinks that I should move out of its way because its bigger than me, despite the fact that I have right of way. As I'm with Mutha_Sterling, she knows I'm a bit of a hot head. I decided to move very slowly and very close to the offending car. As I pass I'm surprise to see its a woman driver.

 

2. Duel carriageway, I overtake a car, once clear I start moving back into my lane, when suddenly, a new shape Fiat Cunto decides to undertake me, driver bashed on thier horn, why? I'm forced to stay on the outside lane (This duel carriageway is very hilly and twisty, and it was raining) So I speed up a bit to pass a Clio, Clio decides he doesnt want a Micra passing him, a Citroen Pickarshole on the outside slams on his brakes, I dive back into the left lane, which is what I wanted on the first place, somehow I manage to pass the Clio, Picasso and carry on down the carriageway almost losing it as it slippy with Cunto on my tail. I pass a few roundabouts when suddenly I see Cunto has caught up with me, I pull into a side road get out of my car and Cunto just carries on klaxoning his horn. TWAT

 

Seriously, what the hell is peoples problem? Why cant I just drive normally and safely without having complete fucking arseholes try and run me off the road. Honestly, I'm gonna hurt someone soon.

 

I think I'd better invest in a baseball bat complete with a few choice nails. ARRRGGGHHH!!!!

[Polystratus]

MORE FUCKING ROAD RAGE!!!!!!

 

 

Seriously, what the hell is peoples problem? Why cant I just drive normally and safely without having complete fucking arseholes try and run me off the road. Honestly, I'm gonna hurt someone soon.

 

 

Typical todays driving standards, what suprises me is you know how fuel prices have shot up over the past couple of weeks, you still see quite a few driving flat out everywhere, either they don't pay for the fuel or know a cheap source somewhere?

[Lankytim]

Chill out Sterling, don't let other people offload their attitude problems onto you. I get cutup loads in the Wifes fezza, it is indeed VERY ANNOYING but meh.. I'f I crash into the ignorant twats it will be their fault and we'l get a new car with the injury claim against them.

[trigger]

Another gem from ebay, I'll selling a whiteboard that I 'acquired' from work, It's only 99p starting and I'm not expecting much, due to it's size I've listed it as collection only hence this in my listing.

 

"Collection only from Ipswich,. Suffolk due to size.", Fair enough you'd think, I get this message tonight.

 

Hi how much u gonna charge for posting to newcastle

 

[autofive]

just tell em 300 quid to newcastle, and another 300 quid for insurance

[scaryoldcortina]

ahh, but he didn't say WHICH Newcastle and may be mong enough to try and make you post it to New South Wales.... so £600 might not be enough