The grumpy thread

[RoverFolkUs]

4 hours ago, jakebullet said:

I'm sick of the arsehole from 10 houses away who lets his dogs out to shit everywhere on a daily basis. Last time I trained* him with a bit of negative reinforcement, aka throwing his dog shite on his focus. I've also seen Alan taking his shovel full of shite for a walk, so he obviously likes a dog shit coated car. Tried a report to council with footage of his dogs roaming n shitting. Zero response / no further way to contact.

Any top tips?

"Hocus pocus, there's dog shite on your Focus" in a Scottish accent. 

Sorry, probably not all that helpful 😂

[angle]

Enterprise. 

I have a big work meeting tomorrow. Its basically the end of two years worth of work, so I'm under strict instructions to wear a suit and tie, and get to Luton for 8am. I'm also in meetings until 10pm tonight to prepare for it. 

Now, my company has a policy where if we need to drive for work and its more than 100 miles or so, we rent a car through them. Current provider is Enterprise, and I get booked a 'Focus or similar'. In theory this is great - they're happy to drop off and pick up cars at the office or to your house at a specific time. The problem is, last time I asked for it to be dropped off at home at 6:30pm and eventually, at quarter to ten, someone dropped off a 1.0 base spec Fabia (59bhp!), with the service light on. 

So, this time I've got a 2 hour gap in meetings so I'll go and pick it up on the way to get the kids from school. I turn up, and the car park is pretty empty. I go in, give them my name and driving licence. 

'That's great, thanks very much. Um - would you mind waiting a second until my manager gets off the phone?'

Oh balls. 

Manager comes over. 'Hi angle! I was just wondering, where are you going?'

Luton.

'Oh, OK. Where's that?'

North of London.

'So...about 150 miles away?'

Yeah, that's about right. 

'Riiiiight. Its just that, we've only got one car left and its electric (she points to an e-Corsa outside). Its only half charged, so its only got about 70 miles of range. There's a rapid charger at the Shell on York Road (a couple of miles away), if you left it on charge for a couple of hours that should be enough to fill it up?'

OK, but if its half full with a range of 70 miles, then a full charge still won't get me to Luton? And I don't have time to charge it tonight and I'm already leaving at half five. 

'Yeah. Yeah, OK. Um - what about a van?' She gestures to a LWB high-top Movano outside. 

*uncomfortable silence*

'No, no, OK. Um, let me make some calls.'

Which is how I found myself waiting outside a backstreet garage in Hartcliffe for a Nissan Juke to be MOTed, with the Corsa lurking around the corner with the Enterprise manager inside, like one of those Clarkson-era Top Gear episodes where they get followed round Bolivia by a Marina or an AMC Gremlin or, um, a Nissan Juke or something in case their Porsche breaks down. 

tldr; I've got to drive to Luton in a Nissan Juke. With the service light on. Fuck my life. 

 

 

 

[Noel Tidybeard]

umm meetings until 10pm start at 8am 150 miles away- what about the 11 hours rest rules?

[High Jetter]

1 hour ago, angle said:

Enterprise. 

To Boldly Go...

[Wibble]

1 hour ago, angle said:

Enterprise. 

I have a big work meeting tomorrow. Its basically the end of two years worth of work, so I'm under strict instructions to wear a suit and tie, and get to Luton for 8am. I'm also in meetings until 10pm tonight to prepare for it. 

Now, my company has a policy where if we need to drive for work and its more than 100 miles or so, we rent a car through them. Current provider is Enterprise, and I get booked a 'Focus or similar'. In theory this is great - they're happy to drop off and pick up cars at the office or to your house at a specific time. The problem is, last time I asked for it to be dropped off at home at 6:30pm and eventually, at quarter to ten, someone dropped off a 1.0 base spec Fabia (59bhp!), with the service light on. 

So, this time I've got a 2 hour gap in meetings so I'll go and pick it up on the way to get the kids from school. I turn up, and the car park is pretty empty. I go in, give them my name and driving licence. 

'That's great, thanks very much. Um - would you mind waiting a second until my manager gets off the phone?'

Oh balls. 

Manager comes over. 'Hi angle! I was just wondering, where are you going?'

Luton.

'Oh, OK. Where's that?'

North of London.

'So...about 150 miles away?'

Yeah, that's about right. 

'Riiiiight. Its just that, we've only got one car left and its electric (she points to an e-Corsa outside). Its only half charged, so its only got about 70 miles of range. There's a rapid charger at the Shell on York Road (a couple of miles away), if you left it on charge for a couple of hours that should be enough to fill it up?'

OK, but if its half full with a range of 70 miles, then a full charge still won't get me to Luton? And I don't have time to charge it tonight and I'm already leaving at half five. 

'Yeah. Yeah, OK. Um - what about a van?' She gestures to a LWB high-top Movano outside. 

*uncomfortable silence*

'No, no, OK. Um, let me make some calls.'

Which is how I found myself waiting outside a backstreet garage in Hartcliffe for a Nissan Juke to be MOTed, with the Corsa lurking around the corner with the Enterprise manager inside, like one of those Clarkson-era Top Gear episodes where they get followed round Bolivia by a Marina or an AMC Gremlin or, um, a Nissan Juke or something in case their Porsche breaks down. 

tldr; I've got to drive to Luton in a Nissan Juke. With the service light on. Fuck my life. 

 

 

 

And I had Enterprise as one of the better suppliers, fuck me that’s shit!

[Talbot]

14 hours ago, angle said:

my company has a policy where if we need to drive for work and its more than 100 miles or so, we rent a car through them. Current provider is Enterprise, and I get booked a 'Focus or similar'. In theory this is great - they're happy to drop off and pick up cars at the office or to your house at a specific time. The problem is, last time I asked for it to be dropped off at home at 6:30pm and eventually, at quarter to ten, someone dropped off a 1.0 base spec Fabia (59bhp!), with the service light on. 

It's at that point you make your line manager aware of the fact that they are not providing an appropriate vehicle for the journey being made.  Company policy be dammned, I'd be using my own car for that and claiming the 45p/mile for the entire journey.

I sometimes forget how good it is to work for a smaller company where we don't have "company policies" like this bollocks.  Posts like this remind me not to complain too much.

(he says, with a 300 mile round-trip to do tomorrow, which is both 45p/mile claimable, and being fuelled by waste veg....)

[Bren]

Facebook marketplace.

You are lucky to get a single word response should you have the audacity to enquire if a vehicle is actually for sale.

Market place is full of end of life shit that should be getting taken away by the likes of redcorn but definately not priced to reflct this.

[GrumpiusMaximus]

Trying to persuade a family member that a particular car is a better fit for them than an end-of-life Alfa with 'severe underbody corrosion' listed at the last MOT when they won't listen and really want an Alfa, despite having a very limited budget and not being able to go and see said car before purchase.

Like pulling fucking teeth.

[goosey]

3 minutes ago, GrumpiusMaximus said:

Trying to persuade a family member that a particular car is a better fit for them than an end-of-life Alfa with 'severe underbody corrosion' listed at the last MOT when they won't listen and really want an Alfa, despite having a very limited budget and not being able to go and see said car before purchase.

Like pulling fucking teeth.

Is it because they want to be a true Petrol head or something like that?

[GrumpiusMaximus]

1 minute ago, goosey said:

Is it because they want to be a true Petrol head or something like that?

They've owned Alfas in the past and 'know the make'.  Or rather, they'll try and irritate the local Alfa specialist garage with constant innane questions again.

In fairness, they've owned a 164, at least two 156s, a 147 so they do have experience with them.  But an Alfa GT with 'severe underbody corrosion' is ridiculous even by their standards.

What they need is something cheap, sensible, reliable and has good parts availability.  The Alfa GT is insurance group 32E...

[wuvvum]

I've broken the Rover.

I went to do an injector leak off test this morning, to try and find the source of the intermittent diesel knock.  Didn't get very far though, as one of the return pipe nozzles in the top of the injectors snapped off as I was prising it out.  It's just the very tip that's snapped, with the rubber sealing ring round it, and it's deep down inside the top of the injector with no feasible way of getting at it to remove it.  So the car is now pissing out diesel whenever the engine is running.  And it's the nozzle on #1 injector which snapped, so it has the return fuel from the other three injectors running through it as well as its own - so it really does piss out.  So the car is now basically immobile until I buy and fit a replacement injector.

FML.

[Talbot]

1 hour ago, GrumpiusMaximus said:

they won't listen and really want an Alfa

Then let them buy an alfa.  When it causes issues, it won't be your problem.

If, however, you steer them to purchasing a sensible-o-box and it then needs a set of brake pads and the screenwash filling up, that will be your fault and "that Alfa would never have needed all this work"

Avoid the issue.  Not your problem.  Etc.

[Shoysty]

1 hour ago, wuvvum said:

I've broken the Rover.

I went to do an injector leak off test this morning, to try and find the source of the intermittent diesel knock.  Didn't get very far though, as one of the return pipe nozzles in the top of the injectors snapped off as I was prising it out.  It's just the very tip that's snapped, with the rubber sealing ring round it, and it's deep down inside the top of the injector with no feasible way of getting at it to remove it.  So the car is now pissing out diesel whenever the engine is running.  And it's the nozzle on #1 injector which snapped, so it has the return fuel from the other three injectors running through it as well as its own - so it really does piss out.  So the car is now basically immobile until I buy and fit a replacement injector.

FML.

small self tapping screw might get it out

[GrumpiusMaximus]

11 minutes ago, Talbot said:

Then let them buy an alfa.  When it causes issues, it won't be your problem.

If, however, you steer them to purchasing a sensible-o-box and it then needs a set of brake pads and the screenwash filling up, that will be your fault and "that Alfa would never have needed all this work"

Avoid the issue.  Not your problem.  Etc.

Unfortunately due to various mobility issues it’s very much our problem as we’ll be the ones picking up the pieces.  I won’t go into specifics on a public forum but it’s a very complex situation...

[Talbot]

As in maintaining the vehicle for them, or having to come to their help when the Alfa shits its gearbox out through the rotten floorpan?

[3VOM]

Insurance last year 225, renewal this year 1200. WTF? I know insurance has gone up but not that much. No, I will not be renewing with you.

[GrumpiusMaximus]

1 hour ago, Talbot said:

As in maintaining the vehicle for them, or having to come to their help when the Alfa shits its gearbox out through the rotten floorpan?

Having to come to their help with practically everything, including when the Alfa shits its gearbox through the rotten floorpan.

It's in our interest to get a decent car for him.  Believe me.  Repairs he can sort himself, fortunately enough.  But currently he has a Focus with a fucked starter motor that he's not getting repaired because 'it won't pass the next MOT', despite said MOT being 5 months away.

Sadly, this isn't a rational situation.

[PhilA]

7 hours ago, Talbot said:

It's at that point you make your line manager aware of the fact that they are not providing an appropriate vehicle for the journey being made.  Company policy be dammned, I'd be using my own car for that and claiming the 45p/mile for the entire journey.

I sometimes forget how good it is to work for a smaller company where we don't have "company policies" like this bollocks.  Posts like this remind me not to complain too much.

(he says, with a 300 mile round-trip to do tomorrow, which is both 45p/mile claimable, and being fuelled by waste veg....)

Yeah, heck with that. Recently the baseline here got put up to 65.5¢/mile which just about covers the car running at 11mpg...

Enterprise are a large enough company that they should have enough suitable cars available. No arguments. If they don't, it's easy enough to go to Avis or National once the contract is up.

Phil

[RoverFolkUs]

6 hours ago, wuvvum said:

I've broken the Rover.

I went to do an injector leak off test this morning, to try and find the source of the intermittent diesel knock.  Didn't get very far though, as one of the return pipe nozzles in the top of the injectors snapped off as I was prising it out.  It's just the very tip that's snapped, with the rubber sealing ring round it, and it's deep down inside the top of the injector with no feasible way of getting at it to remove it.  So the car is now pissing out diesel whenever the engine is running.  And it's the nozzle on #1 injector which snapped, so it has the return fuel from the other three injectors running through it as well as its own - so it really does piss out.  So the car is now basically immobile until I buy and fit a replacement injector.

FML.

Diesel knock is more likely to be dodgy spray patterns. If I were you I'd whip them all out whilst you're at it and pop them over to a diesel specialist to be rig tested, then you know for sure whether they are good or not. 

[RoverFolkUs]

Haven't had a "count down the 2 weeks" for a while...

It's only a bus lane, but I found myself in one earlier for a few seconds

There was a left arrow in the bus lane, and a left/straight on for the middle lane

Trying to plan ahead, I reacted to the left turn only and signalled into there. Then I noticed the [very badly faded, in my defense] solid white line and encountered a "BUS LANE" marking a few seconds later

Quickly got out, there probably wasn't a camera in such a short space of time but I'll find out in 2 weeks. 

Fucking annoying, because faded road marking really piss me off. 

Maybe it would be contestable because of that but a bus lane fine is usually £30 or so, therefore I can't be bothered with the aggro if it comes to it. Just one of those things. 

Still grumpy though...

[Datsuncog]

How's everyone's evening going?

[Metal Guru]

8 minutes ago, Datsuncog said:

How's everyone's evening going?

Lidl’s own label tins are the worst for that.

[GMcD]

22 minutes ago, Datsuncog said:

How's everyone's evening going?

You need one of these. Click

I didn't know they existed until I watched a technology connections yt video a while back. 

I don't use the ring pulls normally as with a safety opener I can reuse the lid and lob in the fridge (a tin of beans is too big for one sitting as my wife thinks baked beans are the devil)

 

 

 

[RoverFolkUs]

14 minutes ago, Metal Guru said:

Lidl’s own label tins are the worst for that.

Which is helpful, because it prevents you from consuming their disgusting baked beans. I've been served better from a sketchy B&B 🤢

[GMcD]

1 hour ago, RoverFolkUs said:

Haven't had a "count down the 2 weeks" for a while...

It's only a bus lane, but I found myself in one earlier for a few seconds

There was a left arrow in the bus lane, and a left/straight on for the middle lane

Trying to plan ahead, I reacted to the left turn only and signalled into there. Then I noticed the [very badly faded, in my defense] solid white line and encountered a "BUS LANE" marking a few seconds later

Quickly got out, there probably wasn't a camera in such a short space of time but I'll find out in 2 weeks. 

Fucking annoying, because faded road marking really piss me off. 

Maybe it would be contestable because of that but a bus lane fine is usually £30 or so, therefore I can't be bothered with the aggro if it comes to it. Just one of those things. 

Still grumpy though...

A good number of them in the southside of Glasgow have been suspended for months (small yellow sign on them).

It's quite joyful driving up them and passing queues of traffic as 8/10 drivers seem incapable of reading them. 

[adw1977]

32 minutes ago, Datsuncog said:

How's everyone's evening going?

This has happened to me a few times recently with Branston Beans.

[Datsuncog]

8 hours ago, GMcD said:

You need one of these. Click

Fortunately, I've quite a similar side-cutting opener which rode to the rescue:

But it was just that sinking feeling of "ah, FFS" as the ring pull came off at the slightest pressure, leaving me standing there like a numpty.

Not the first time it's ever happened to me, but interesting that others have had the same bother specifically with Branson lately!

[Markeh]

From what I can tell Enterprise have gone very downhill as of late.

Friend of mine had his vehicle break down in Germany, was flown back to Birmingham, where he tried to collect a car that the AA had arranged at Enterprise - turns out there were no spare vehicles in the entirety of Birmingham, ended up being fetched from the airport by someone else.

Another friend received a reasonably ropey i10 with the service, TPMS and EML on.

[EyesWeldedShut]

Last night, last lot at Anglia Car Auctions, 70K miles, one owner, licking my lips in anticipation when the bloody online bidding thing borked on me - I think it sold for £450 or thereabouts

[GrumpiusMaximus]

On 9/27/2023 at 11:57 AM, GrumpiusMaximus said:

Trying to persuade a family member that a particular car is a better fit for them than an end-of-life Alfa with 'severe underbody corrosion' listed at the last MOT when they won't listen and really want an Alfa, despite having a very limited budget and not being able to go and see said car before purchase.

Like pulling fucking teeth.

Well, my partner gave him a deadline of yesterday night to let us know what he actually wants.  We were travelling to a different part of the country where the perfect car was available and had a few days to contact the seller and arrange a viewing and now he's lost that opportunity.

I expect a fucked Alfa in my near future.  His problem now.