The grumpy thread

[DodgeRover]

I've been woken up between 2-3am for the last 4 nights by whatever now lives in the walls of my house. I heard it run across the floor of the spare room above my bedroom last night and estimate it to be the size of a cat or small dog. Probably rats.

 

There are deffo mice because I woke up on Sunday night to hear something rustling around under the bedside cabinet, looked under with a torch to find a mouse which panicked and ran straight into a trap, it's the only one I've managed to catch in nearly two years of living here...

Squirrels maybe? Watch out for the wiring as they love having a good chew on it - strangely you never find any piles of bones where they've electrocuted themselves.

Once they've worked out it's warm and dry they are a real bugger to get rid of/ keep out.

 

May I recommend HP Lovecrafts "The rats in the walls" as tonight's bed time read?

[Mr_Bo11ox]

It's what made Britain great (allegedly).

No it isn't

[Tamworthbay]

Squirrels maybe? Watch out for the wiring as they love having a good chew on it - strangely you never find any piles of bones where they've electrocuted themselves.

Once they've worked out it's warm and dry they are a real bugger to get rid of/ keep out.

We had rats in our cavity a few years back. The hole got on through wasn't much bigger than an old 10p piece. I filled it with builders foam but that lasted a night so I filled it with chicken wire and then epoxy resin and that has stopped them.

 

And if you think you haven't seen rats so it can't be, there are ALWAYS rats close by.

[Tamworthbay]

No it isn't

OH YES IT IS!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Or it could have been pantomimes, one or other I'm sure.

[plasticvandan]

I thought it was queuing?

[Parky]

I do sympathise with Jake. After all if idiot sister should get a tug and a fine, he will be blamed and probably have to stump up her fine.

 

Jake - threaten to grass her to Plod, then do it. Idiot sister and Ma will disown you and both you and KG will be free of it all

[Tamworthbay]

I thought it was queuing?

Technically it was invading other countries, robbing their wealth and enslaving their population but if we keep quiet about it no one will find out.............

[Alfamale]

People, well vegans and vegetarians anyway, who are "outraged" as there are traces of animal products in the new fiver. Is this really all you've got to worry about in life? FFS.

 

Tell you what Veronica Vegan of Islington, if you don't like the bloody things send them to me and I'll give them a good home in my free range money sanctuary.

[Mr_Bo11ox]

No vegan complaint can ever eclipse PandaSelecta with his SAAB 900, 'for sale as my vegan friends will not travel in it due to having leather seats'

[scaryoldcortina]

I remember that! That lad was a massive source of LOLS.

 

I think there is more to worry about on the hands of the last person to touch the note than some possible sheep fat used in its manufacture.

[cort1977]

But you miss the true joy of the thread then, we all know that the majority of any minority are decent, whether that be cyclists, Gooner drivers, hell even the odd beetle or new mini driver MUST be ok, so I haven't met them yet but there must be at least one out there, but sometimes we Brits just need to moan like fuck about stuff that doesn't really matter and heaven knows we have reason to moan at the moment. And as English speaking, of sorts, semi relatives, you are more than welcome to,join in as let's face it you have enough reasons of your own to be depressed following recent events. So sit back and enjoy a great session of picking faults in someone else whilst ignoring all of your own faults. It's what made Britain great (allegedly).

You're right, shouldn't take grumps on this thread too seriously.   I am British, just been living over here for a few years, maybe my powers of being grumpily pedantic are fading...

[Tamworthbay]

You're right, shouldn't take grumps on this thread too seriously.   I am British, just been living over here for a few years, maybe my powers of being grumpily pedantic are fading...

That's the spirit, start moaning about something for no good reason, preferably a minority of some sort and you will feel all British again!

[EssDeeWon]

Sold an iPad on ebay, sold straight away for a decent price but I stated collection only and cash because I am not dealing with those McRobbers Paypal after holding onto my money last time.  Bidder has good feedback but its like dealing with a 5 year old. They live the best part of a 2 hour drive away so I offered collection in central london.  Great said 5 year old person, but not heard anything since despite giving them my phone number.  Problem is I now have ebay fee's pending for 28 sovs otherwise I'd tell them to do one.

 

Hate dealing with stupid people with no communication skills.

[Kiltox]

Fuck cars.

 

Rover has a dead battery so my attempt to move it inside out of the weather failed miserably

 

C3 that is booked in for a test tomorrow so I can sell the hateful thing has shit it's gear linkage so I can't select reverse

 

Toyota I'm going to take for a test instead hasn't a hope in hell of passing and has decided it doesn't have a working heater so demisting it in sub zero temperatures is pretty much impossible

 

Fucksake

[Richard]

C3 gear linkage will be an outer cable come adrift at the gearbox end, you might be able to stick it back in if it's not too mangled. Before I replaced the C5's cable I had an elaborate system of jubilee clips holding it in place, hanging from the exhaust manifold IIRC.

[Kiltox]

I'll try and get it inside so I can have a look - might be a bit difficult sans reverse mind

[robinmasters]

This bloody advert.

 

 

What exactly is she supposed to be fixing, at the roadside, without getting oily, with only a ~2“ combination spanner?

[Guest Hooli]

I've been woken up between 2-3am for the last 4 nights by whatever now lives in the walls of my house. I heard it run across the floor of the spare room above my bedroom last night and estimate it to be the size of a cat or small dog. Probably rats.

 

There are deffo mice because I woke up on Sunday night to hear something rustling around under the bedside cabinet, looked under with a torch to find a mouse which panicked and ran straight into a trap, it's the only one I've managed to catch in nearly two years of living here...

 

You don't normally get rats and mice. Rats will eat the mice ya see....

 

I had rats in the walls once, walking up to the noise of them in the bin at the bottom of my bed wasn't a nice way to spend most nights.

[Pillock]

If vegans are going to refuse to touch five pound notes because of Tallow, then to my knowledge they also need to steer clear of bike and car tyres, bank cards, and bin liners. So they need to walk to the bank to draw all their money out over the counter in coins, and eat their own rubbish.

 

Pretty sure it's a waste product, but there's already a petition started which presumably means the BoE will have to buckle to some ignorant gobshites, and the animal processors will start chucking waste tallow into landfill.

 

Fuck vegans. Sorry if anyone on here is vegan - and actually, if you are then well done because you apparently manage to be the best kind of vegan; one that just gets on with it and has changed their lifestyle in the way they wanted. Honestly, I salute you, I'm not taking the piss. You're brilliant, because I have no idea who you are.

So actually, fuck vegans who wish to press their lifestyle onto others. The ones that stand in the city centre holding placards with pictures of cruelty on (clue: just because you got it printed onto some cardboard doesn't make it true), who try and stop you for a conversation and then heckle you if you don't play ball, who spend all night on Twitter searching for people tweeting McDonalds/KFC/Lidl or whoever the target is this week and bombard them with crap. 

[Pillock]

Aaawwwww man now you've got me started. Next up: fuck internet censorship and tracking. Just found out we're well on the way to blocking "unconventional" porn sites. Not going to go into what that does and doesn't cover, but it's nothing illegal - just not straightforward stuff. 

So what does this mean? Well, firstly sites will have to apply to be reviewed by the BBFC, a board of old people deciding what law-abiding people can and can't watch in their own homes. 

Secondly, welcome to China. First, blocking "unconventional" porn. Next, blocking anything else that might be edgy. How long before the government-run web blockers selectively filter political news? How long before, I dunno, Google.com is blocked so you have to use Google.co.uk and all the celebrities that have had searches removed don't show up? Or Netflix bung the government some cash to prevent access to their foreign servers that quite frankly are 100x better than the UK film selection.

 

The list of people who will be allowed access to the sites you visit is long and varied too. FFS, the Department for Work and Pensions will have access, so prepare to have your benefits stopped if you've been on a travel website to book a holiday. I can't even begin to imagine why the Food Standards Agency has access to your browsing history, but they will.

 

Lastly, it just shows that the government's ideas about how the internet works is massively skewed, and that simply signing up for a £30pa VPN gets around all that - something that people into their donkey porn, or home made rocket launchers, are already doing.

[DodgeRover]

Aaawwwww man now you've got me started. Next up: fuck internet censorship and tracking. Just found out we're well on the way to blocking "unconventional" porn sites. Not going to go into what that does and doesn't cover, but it's nothing illegal - just not straightforward stuff. 

So what does this mean? Well, firstly sites will have to apply to be reviewed by the BBFC, a board of old people deciding what law-abiding people can and can't watch in their own homes. 

Secondly, welcome to China. First, blocking "unconventional" porn. Next, blocking anything else that might be edgy. How long before the government-run web blockers selectively filter political news? How long before, I dunno, Google.com is blocked so you have to use Google.co.uk and all the celebrities that have had searches removed don't show up? Or Netflix bung the government some cash to prevent access to their foreign servers that quite frankly are 100x better than the UK film selection.

 

The list of people who will be allowed access to the sites you visit is long and varied too. FFS, the Department for Work and Pensions will have access, so prepare to have your benefits stopped if you've been on a travel website to book a holiday. I can't even begin to imagine why the Food Standards Agency has access to your browsing history, but they will.

 

Lastly, it just shows that the government's ideas about how the internet works is massively skewed, and that simply signing up for a £30pa VPN gets around all that - something that people into their donkey porn, or home made rocket launchers, are already doing.

 

I have a feeling that a certain former Prime Ministers intimate moment with a pigs head might fall under the unconventional, after all the pig didn't give consent, could there be a tape of the alleged incident about to be made public hence the need to cover it up?

[M'coli]

Unconventional porn includes micturation (pissing) and female ejaculation, but from what I can gather, 2 men in the wrong 'un is fine...

[Mr_Bo11ox]

Good to know

[Pillock]

Two *whole* men?

[cort1977]

Aaawwwww man now you've got me started. Next up: fuck internet censorship and tracking. Just found out we're well on the way to blocking "unconventional" porn sites. Not going to go into what that does and doesn't cover, but it's nothing illegal - just not straightforward stuff. 

So what does this mean? Well, firstly sites will have to apply to be reviewed by the BBFC, a board of old people deciding what law-abiding people can and can't watch in their own homes. 

Secondly, welcome to China. First, blocking "unconventional" porn. Next, blocking anything else that might be edgy. How long before the government-run web blockers selectively filter political news? How long before, I dunno, Google.com is blocked so you have to use Google.co.uk and all the celebrities that have had searches removed don't show up? Or Netflix bung the government some cash to prevent access to their foreign servers that quite frankly are 100x better than the UK film selection.

 

The list of people who will be allowed access to the sites you visit is long and varied too. FFS, the Department for Work and Pensions will have access, so prepare to have your benefits stopped if you've been on a travel website to book a holiday. I can't even begin to imagine why the Food Standards Agency has access to your browsing history, but they will.

 

Lastly, it just shows that the government's ideas about how the internet works is massively skewed, and that simply signing up for a £30pa VPN gets around all that - something that people into their donkey porn, or home made rocket launchers, are already doing.

Not just skewed but just wrong, you're totally right but I am comforted by the thought that efforts at censorship and prohibition usually fail.   It may have the benefit of making unconventional enthusiasts more tech-literate setting up their VPNs and Tor software.

[tinribs]

Unconventional porn includes micturation (pissing) and female ejaculation, but from what I can gather, 2 men in the wrong 'un is fine...

Face-sitting is also a no-no, so I read elsewhere.

 

So the usual Jap bukkake spunkfest is fine, but a girl squirting from a strong orgasm isn't.

 

Equal rights and all that shite. Yay.

[Cavcraft]

I get the opposite problem up here at night, cyclists here seem to use as ww2 searchlights on their bike and 1 million watt led head torches.I'm sure the rear lights they have are surplus stock from Edinburgh airport.

 

That'll be me. I'd rather see and be seen, than either getting knocked off or fall into a BFO pot hole. If car drivers can have blinding xenons and go round with their fucking fog lights on in normal weather conditions, why can't I be allowed to see where I'm going? 

Incidentally (not necessarily aimed at you) but if you drive dangerously close to a cyclist some of us might put our 2,000,000 watt front lights onto the strobe setting and aim that at your rear view mirror.

 

Why are they not subject to insurance either? If one runs into your car he can play the poverty card and get away with it. I don't think a premium of say £150 year would be unreasonable to charge.

 

These head cams they have on as well, going off like they are the ambassadors of the bloody road, meting out 'justice' on their boring YouTube videos of their blinkered approach to common courtesy. I always enjoy the ones where they get a pasting off somebody.

 

That's fair enough, but as your car is going to do 100 times the damage to my bike if you hit me then I don't think an insurance premium of £15,000 would be unreasonable to charge.

[Eddie Honda]

 

 

Ffs. Have you told her its 3 points plus a fine (£150?) PER tyre? FPN is £200 + 3 points. (On 16 Aug 2013 it went up from £120)

I thought the fine was £1000 per tyre? Naw, Level 4 fine per offence: up to £2500 + 3 points (A Level 4 fine has been two-and-a-half bags since 1 Oct 1992. It was a grand before then)

 

That's an "up to" amount. Depends how gobby she gets with the police beak (but financial circumstances are taken into account).

 

Ah come on lads, keep up now!

[dave21478]

The unconventional porn blocking is one thing.....apparently 3 fingers up a minge is fine, but 4 is unacceptable....its the spying and logging thats the real bad news.

Tinfoil hat wearers would suggest that they have simply made official what they have been doing anyway, and they are probably not wrong, but its an exceedingly dangerous, slipperly slope to allow benefits agencies, health providers etc access to peoples browsing history, apparently without need for any kind of warrant or even good reason....just free, unlimited access. There is literally no good reason for this.

 

It doesnt apply to politicians though - they dont get their internet history logged or snooped. Talk about "them and us"".....

 

Of all the shit that has gone down over recent years, its THIS that should have the entire nation protesting in the streets and kicking down the gates of parliament, but as usual its some grumbling on forums and a .gov petition to stop the charter.....signing that is basically painting a target on your head ffs.

[Cheggers]

 

 

.....apparently 3 fingers up a minge is fine, but 4 is unacceptable

 

KitKat porn is never acceptable.

 

 

 

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