The grumpy thread

[Captain Mainwaring]

A good example of the above...

 

http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/envi ... 070912397/

 

EDIT: Eeek, dunno what's happened there, just copy and paste the whole text instead.

[meggersdog]

Tight-fisted farmers.Today I was called out to look at an oil leak on a diesel Pajero belonging to a local farmer.Quite hard to tell but it seemed to be coming from the back of the head gasket.Rocker gasket off and it's not leaking from the D shaped rubber insert.This is the 2.8 so it doesn't have that funny ballbearing in the back of the head.Right then "off with his head" time.After undoing eleventy million bolts the head was free.As soon as I removed the head I saw the problem.Someone had fitted the cheapest of cheap copy gaskets as one of the holes for the oil-way doesn't line up blocking half the oil wayand the copper ring is right at the edge of the block.I phoned the farmer and told him what I had found."No,that can't be right I fitted a new gasket last year" was his reply.Well it's not going to stretch in one small place and quite clearly was fitted like that.There are two oil-ways at the back one lines up perfectly the other does not.If the tight fisted git had spent a little more on a gasket set in the first place I wouldn't have to redo a job he did six months ago.

[Mr Lobster]

My fucking employer.You utter set of cunts with the management skills of a sausage.That is all for the moment. I shall return to this matter at somepoint in future.

[warren t claim]

Warnings on cigarette packets - including a picture of a man with what looks like throat cancer (which has been left beyond the attention of a doctor), and someone's minging teeth. Also a set of lungs - one non-smoker, the other a 1000 cigs a day person who worked in a place where they tested the affects of asbestos and burning rubber on a human being.I reckon there should be warnings on sweets and fast food. If they can put something this patronising on ciggies, it should be the same on eveything else. I hate smoking, having just recently started up again, but not sure what the people who do this are trying to achieve, ie putting the absolute worst case scenario images on ciggies.

My local newsagent know to only sell me smokes with a positive message on the back.

[barrett]

still no news on the olive. i think it's gone beyond the point where i'd be happy to eat it now. i'll keep you updated.

[Mr H Sceptre]

still no news on the olive. i think it's gone beyond the point where i'd be happy to eat it now. i'll keep you updated.

Have you got a cat or similar. It might have squirreled the olive away somewhere. As they do.

[shite_meister]

still no news on the olive. i think it's gone beyond the point where i'd be happy to eat it now. i'll keep you updated.

Have a look for a small ball of hair as this might be the now hirsuite aforemention olive.A bloke I work with was at home enjoying a Toblerone and some booze in front of the TV, after finishing the choc he spied what he thought was a chunk of Toblerone on the carpet so he pounced upon it and wolfed it down...only to realise it was cat shit instead.

[Mr H Sceptre]

^

[barrett]

I do have cats, but they dont come in my room. they dont like olives either.anyway, I found it! It had fallen into the folds of my bin liner, so didn't fancy eating it as it's full of snotty* tissues and ashtray emptyings.mabe I should put this on the 'antidote' thread?

[Rusty Pelican]

My fucking employer.You utter set of cunts with the management skills of a sausage.That is all for the moment. I shall return to this matter at somepoint in future.

You got the same boss as me , mine couldnt run a bath let alone something thats supposed to keep me employed

[FredTransit]

The CPS. You call the police, you have caught the gits red handed. They are released without charge, even allowed to drive off with no road tax. What's the fookin point of calling the police in the first place?

[Tayne]

.

[barrett]

lol, I watch about 2 hours of TV a month and i've seen that advert about six fucking times tonight.still reckon the missus is a bit of a sort though

[Father Ted]

The CPS. You call the police, you have caught the gits red handed. They are released without charge, even allowed to drive off with no road tax. What's the fookin point of calling the police in the first place?

+1Caught the bastards that nicked my fiesta red handed, chased them, got police to pick them up (fleeing the crashed car) and gave one of them a sound twatting - and the police didnt prosecute because of "lack of evidence".Then when I got my mangled car back from being fingerprinted the boot was full of stolen DSS & pension books, video recorders, prison clothing, and drugs / paraphernalia. I went slightly spastic menatlist at the police.

[Rocket88]

If any of this kind of shit happens to you, go to your local paper, they love stuff like this.

[Father Ted]

Fuck fuck fuckity fuck fuck fuck off. Just for fucks sake stop being a fucking cunt and fuck off. There are people worse off in the world and you are just being and arse, now fuck off.

[Father Ted]

Sorry, just having a quick sweary session.

[FredTransit]

If any of this kind of shit happens to you, go to your local paper, they love stuff like this.

As I already mentioned, I think I will stick with anonymity as it might one day come in handy....

[CortinaDave]

Fines. And being landed with a barrage of them that cost you a fortune for insignificant tosh.Got stopped by plod a month or so back pulling away from a shop.. instant £60 fine because i hadnt fastened my seatbelt BEFORE i drove off... grrrDVLA fining me over the current owner of my old blue capri not taxing it, saying they never recieved the logbook from me. Wrote to them, again supplying the new keepers address etc, but the fine stands. £80.£100 fine for not filing my tax return on time because i had no cash to pay the accountant to do so!So there;s £240 straight down the swanee - for nothing.

[Lankytim]

Loads of people ignore those DVLA fines and they end up going away. They may have changed their system and drag you through court/send bailiffs round now though.

[brammy777]

This isnt a grump, Im just shocked at what I saw today! A 1970 Beetle has been traded in for the scrappage scheme in Basingstoke. I thought these were worth way more than 2k.

[Des]

Loads of people ignore those DVLA fines and they end up going away. They may have changed their system and drag you through court/send bailiffs round now though.

A few years ago it was fairly safe to ignore the buggers, but they've now had a few years to get the hang of stealth taxing us. A couple of years ago they clamped my van when the tax ran out, I hadn't received the reminder, Pulled the clamp off, and took the van for an MOT, to cover my arse, and stashed the van out of sight in yard. After a year of threatening letters, while I waited for them to go away, I get a summons to attend court, wrote a fictional piece and photocopied the MOT cert, sent to the court and only then did it go away.So, the answer seems to be, sadly, that the DVLA won't let it go anymore, and even when you're innocent you'll have a battle on your hands.

[Guest]

Disease. I've had some kind of cold for over a week. Gradually started losing my voice on Tuesday and have been unable to speak properly since. Dependent on how I feel I can either string out whole sentences in a painful monotone, or get a few words done before I "run out" and have to abandon the sentence halfway through.

 

Quite frankly, it can frrrr..... (shrug, thumbs down, V-sign)

 

I've phoned in so I'm going back to bed.

[whitevanman]

sounds similiar to mine.Sunday....unable to breathe, feel like you've gone 10 rounds with a boxerMonday.... unable to breathe, Elephant sitting on my chest.Tuesday... I can breathe!! but now drowning in snot, Elephant has fucked off though, and always sneezing.Wednesday... drowning stopped, Blowing blood out of my nose !!!Thursday... thick head, clear nose, almost starting to feel alive today

[retrogeezer]

I'm just getting over that, it took a week and I've had a nasty stomach bug as well in the meantime..

[Minimad5]

VIRTUAL FORUM BUG IS REAL !An online forum Autoshite, has been hit with growing number of victims.Symptoms are believed to be... Loss of breath, asif you have witnessed a giffer spec Tagora with a FREE sign, ... and so on and so forth.Does anyone know how to remove Underseal from hair ?it's stuck fast

[Tayne]

,

[AnthonyG]

This isnt a grump, Im just shocked at what I saw today! A 1970 Beetle has been traded in for the scrappage scheme in Basingstoke. I thought these were worth way more than 2k.

Depends on condition. I've seen a lot of old shitters scrape a MOT but they really need both a new engine and bodyshell.

[dollywobbler]

On the DVLA matter, I once had the whole "BAM here's a fine as you haven't SORNd the car." I'd actually sold the car to a friend, who sold it on again and I just gave him the logbook. Eventually, managed to get the DVLA to back down with a LOT of letters from all three of us. If you don't know who now has the car, that's tricky.Did you do a receipt when you sold it?

[messerschmitt owner]

people selling cars on autotrader where the price is advertised as £999 but it is actually £3599 or also listing a new car on the old car's advert so what I'm looking at isn't a Peugeot 406 estate but a Vauxhall Corsa or similar.So, I'm looking at bargain cars - explain to me why I want to buy your overpriced £3500 or whatever vehicle? And why would I go and look at a car that isn't the one in your advert? I just think you're a cheapskate who can't be arsed to pay for a new advert, and therefore your car is likely to be nasty too.