The grumpy thread

[cms206]

Sorry to hear that Richard, hope all pans out ok.

[Micrashed]

Have to say I’d be fuppin furious if someone did this to me. 

 

But would you end your advert of leave it running for no apparent reason other than "Ive paid £14.99 for a classified ad to run 28 days and Im going to leave it running for 28 days"

 

I should also say I tend to lie a lot and perhaps not take everything I say as gospel.

[Cavcraft]

Fucking DVLA, again.

 

At least six weeks ago I cashed the tax disc back in and filled the form in saying it'd been scrapped. The people who took the car had confirmed it'd been scrapped and DVLA had been notified.

TODAY I get a letter back asking why the cash was taxed in and that they 'usually refund from the date they got the reply to this letter.'  Yeah, nice one wankers, I said it'd been scrapped, you know it's been scrapped and now you're trying to squeeze a couple of months off the fucking refund, you absolute fucking gobshite bastards.

[HH-R]

I've noticed loads of cars on Autotrader being sold but still advertised later, the person has logged in to change it to sold, just flippin remove it! That website gets more infuriating by the day, including the "you've searched for a £500 knacker, would you like to see the featured car that's for sale for £11,000"?

 

I feel your pain with the DVLA ^ they really are flippin terrible. What puts me off most about changing cars is the last few times I've dealt with the DVLA has been a bloody NIGHTMARE.

[Richard]

How does one drop a clanger, literally? I don't know what a clanger actually is?

 

I dropped a 20kg weight down a chute that it wasn't meant to go down, I imagine the origin of the phrase is something very similar to that.

 

It turned out ok in the end, not least because the customer had added some irrelevant shit to the genuine complaint, which set off the director's chancer sensor. The director who dealt with it has been away for weeks and only came back yesterday, so things should improve on the being pissed about front.

[Lankytim]

Got the XM back tonight, new pipe in place, no leaks!

 

It's been incorrectly routed of course, but then that's par for the course with an MOT repair type of garage, and a heat shield has a bolt out, and i'm not sure if the brakes have been bled but the XM is back in the game!

[greengartside]

Scrapped the K11 Micra in this morning after it would have cost megabucks to get another M.o.T, so I've pressed the Astra into daily use.

 

Went to change the insurance over from my Hyundai to the Astra - I do less mileage so adjusted that and also took SWMBO off as a named driver yet I've ended up paying £30 extra A MONTH for the privilege! WHAT THE FUCK!?!?

 

Absolutely raging doesn't cover it - and there's diddly-squat I can do about it. Quote me Happy? Yeah sure. As soon as the year's NCB is claimed in December then they can go get fucked.

[chaseracer]

...also took SWMBO off as a named driver yet I've ended up paying £30 extra A MONTH for the privilege...

 

Cause and effect.

 

This is why Domestic Management is a named driver on all my policies, despite refusing to drive everything except the 205.

[beko1987]

Same here, although being a multicar policy I think its a requirement. We rarely drive each others cars, alcohol being the main reason (when I drove the meriva back from the pub last weekend I couldn't see a fucking thing past the a pillars!)

[skattrd]

Cause and effect.

 

This is why Domestic Management is a named driver on all my policies, despite refusing to drive everything except the 205.

 

I had the same thing, I used to have my sister on my policy despite the fact she never drove my cars and is covered to drive anything on the garage policy. Adding her on to my policy dropped my premium.

[Sigmund Fraud]

Bloody old cars... Spent an hour yesterday trying to undo the crank pulley of my newly acquired R8 : I used a 1/2" breaker bar and almost ripped the engine mountings off but the bolt didn't budge !!!

 

I checked the factory manual, and the thing is apparently torqued to 205Nm.  So I fully expect I'll have to buy a £200 impact gun to do the cambelt on my £250 car... Great.

[twosmoke300]

Just go to your local lorry workshop and slip em a tenner and ask them to buzz it off for your . Nip it back up and drive home. Or local agri engineer

[Lankytim]

You own an Audi R8?

[dollywobbler]

Rover innit? I gave up trying to do the cambelt on mine for the same reason. Using a big sod-off bar just proved that the clutch will slip (nice!) and my impact gun failed to shift it at all.

[Jim Bell]

All you need is a 30ft breaker bar and a ladder.

[gordonbennet]

Breaker bars are NBG, what you want for shifting crank and hub nuts etc  is an old school clicker type torque wrench, mines an old Britool, hefty bits of kit they, they do not bend even a fraction of an inch, thick enough to get a serious grip on (or slip a short scaffold pole extension on) or even hold your size 11 boot on it under pressure, then give the socket top a bloody good clout with the hammer if needed.

 

Impact socket set too, fookin seriously solid 6 sided sockets, once on they don't slip.

 

Nothing's failed to be undone yet with that combo, the Subaru lads reckoned the hub nuts would be tight, they were piss easy.

 

Good idea about slipping a lorry mechanic  a few quid to shift this bugger for you, lorry tyre fitters usually have good impact guns but the chances of them having the right sized socket not worn to buggery is slim.

[dugong]

Seriously lacking in arsedness today.

[Lankytim]

Can't you brace the breaker bar against the floor and turn the engine over on the starter?

[dave21478]

Leave a gap between the breaker bar and whatever you brace it against (ground, lower arm etc) so that the engine gets a little momentum up before hitting the bar against whatever it will hit and cracking the bolt - this is more likely than just bracing against something which relies purely on the starter motors power.

 

HANG ON...R8? Honda engine? dont some of these turn the opposite way from normal? This trick wont work then.

[dave21478]

My own grump - supposed to be a quiet day off work today but its been shattered by builders setting up scaffolding right outside my fucking window.

 

Seems that the neighbours are getting some bloody awful looking exterior insulation and faux rendering nailed to the outside of their house. 

 

To the left is the access to my garden and garage, so now I cant get cars in and out. Before they got too far along I moved the car out into the street.

 

"How long will you be here for...a couple of days?" I asked, thinking that a long weekend at home might be just the tonic to revive flagging moral.

 

"Be about 3 weeks" the dude replied.

 

3 weeks? THREE WEEKS? how the fuck is it going to take them three weeks to do that, they are only doing two walls.

And then they fucked off sharpish at 11.45 for lunch and its now 3pm and they are still not back yet - thats why its going to take them three weeks.

 

 

[wuvvum]

Fucking scooter broke down on the way into work this morning.  It wasn't even the cheap Chinese bike either, it was the (admittedly 31-year-old) Honda.  It'll start straight up and idle happily, but as soon as I try to give it any welly it bogs down.  I eventually found out that if I give it about half throttle until it bogs down, then let off for five seconds and give it half throttle again, it will eventually drag itself up to about 25 on the flat.  Hills are a complete no-no though.

 

Feels like fuel starvation - there's plenty of fuel getting to the carb, so probably a blocked jet or summat.  Ironically, it's happened on the first proper run the bike has had since I fitted an inline fuel filter to try and avoid any crap finding its way into the carb.   

 

So I'll probably be going home by AA van tonight, as there's no way I'm riding 15 miles along a busy A-road at 20mph, and I have a feeling that the 30-year-old Philips screws that hold the float bowl on are going to be beyond the ability of Mr. AA Man to whip off in the car park - and removal of the complete carb requires the nearside rear shock to be taken off, so a royal PITA all round.  I might buzz down to Halfords after work (all downhill from here) and buy a can of carb cleaner to see if that helps at all, but I'm not holding my breath.

[dugong]

Gutted Wuvs - are you going to the East Coast Retros meet on Friday?

[Sigmund Fraud]

Thanks for the advice, chaps.

 

I could never live with the embarassment of owning an Audi R8. The car in question is my povo-spec 214, for which I have yet to do a collection/recommission thread.

 

I've tried the starter trick, which didn't work. No friendly agricultural engineers close by, plus the car is in far too many bits to travel far, so I'm on my own.

 

Clutch and brakes are strong enough to hold the crank still, I just can't get enough torque on the bloody thing to move it !

 

I reckon the next step would be plenty of heat (people tend to loctite those bolts in place, pure madness if you ask me !) combined with a scaffold pole and (even) more profanity. If this fails, I will have no option but to find a 400Nm gun...

[Sigmund Fraud]

Fucking scooter broke down on the way into work this morning.  It wasn't even the cheap Chinese bike either, it was the (admittedly 31-year-old) Honda.  It'll start straight up and idle happily, but as soon as I try to give it any welly it bogs down.  I eventually found out that if I give it about half throttle until it bogs down, then let off for five seconds and give it half throttle again, it will eventually drag itself up to about 25 on the flat.  Hills are a complete no-no though.

 

My Moby did exactly the same earlier this week... It was also fuel-related, 40-year-old debris from the tank is somehow finding its way to the carb jet. Nothing that an italian tuneup can't fix !

[bub2006]

Regarding scooter wuvvum, mine did this not long after i bought it. Bits of crap in main jet. Happened twice so thought would fit an online fuel filter. My scooter has a vacuum tap and for some reason would not draw petrol through the filter properly and would not provide enough fuel at sustained high rpm. Ditched filter and just replaced vacuum tap,fuel hose and vac hose and had no issues since. My scooter was stood for a few years before i bought it

[daveb47]

Fucking scooter broke down on the way into work this morning.  It wasn't even the cheap Chinese bike either, it was the (admittedly 31-year-old) Honda.  It'll start straight up and idle happily, but as soon as I try to give it any welly it bogs down.  I eventually found out that if I give it about half throttle until it bogs down, then let off for five seconds and give it half throttle again, it will eventually drag itself up to about 25 on the flat.  Hills are a complete no-no though.

 

Feels like fuel starvation - there's plenty of fuel getting to the carb, so probably a blocked jet or summat.  Ironically, it's happened on the first proper run the bike has had since I fitted an inline fuel filter to try and avoid any crap finding its way into the carb.   

 

So I'll probably be going home by AA van tonight, as there's no way I'm riding 15 miles along a busy A-road at 20mph, and I have a feeling that the 30-year-old Philips screws that hold the float bowl on are going to be beyond the ability of Mr. AA Man to whip off in the car park - and removal of the complete carb requires the nearside rear shock to be taken off, so a royal PITA all round.  I might buzz down to Halfords after work (all downhill from here) and buy a can of carb cleaner to see if that helps at all, but I'm not holding my breath.

Take air filter hose off carb

Rev engine as much as possible

While revving put hand over intake for a second or so till it almost stops then release keeping throttle as wide open as you can,repeat a few times.

Hopefully this will draw water/shit etc though jets and clear them.

[chaseracer]

Can't you brace the breaker bar against the floor and turn the engine over on the starter?

 

 

[Asimo]

Crankshaft pulleys

 

"Breaker bars" are too springy; I keep a few 3/4" drive sockets, Tommy bar and a four foot scaffold pole for this sort of thing. always works IF there is room.

[JohnDeere]

I could never live with the embarassment of owning an Audi R8. The car in question is my povo-spec 214, for which I have yet to do a collection/recommission thread.

 

And there was me thinking you'd acquired one of these:

 

[wuvvum]

Gutted Wuvs - are you going to the East Coast Retros meet on Friday?

 

Yep.  Not by moped though.  Will probably be in the Rover of Doom.