The grumpy thread

[comfortablynumb]

3 minutes ago, artdjones said:

Toxteth

😱

[myglaren]

No shops that I am aware of like that around here, even the 'corner shops'.

One of my grandsons works in a Tesco in Newcastle and they do get stuff stolen, or attempts to steal stuff at least but nothing is walled off like that.

[Markeh]

38 minutes ago, Zelandeth said:

Pretty much the whole alcoholic drinks section aside from the absolute cheapest of lager etc in our local Morrisons is now locked behind doors on the shelves - you have to ask a member of staff to come and open it to get anything out.  

This might be a Morrisons thing as my local one's started doing this too.

[comfortablynumb]

Iceland in Wisbech has all the spirits in a locked box, but apparently beer isn't a risk

[Markeh]

The supplying dealer where I got my Qashqai from closed a year or two ago (Evans Halshaw lost the Nissan franchise). I'm not sure what went on for dividing up customers/customer contacts, but I'm not sure why I, having a Nottingham address and having bought a car from a Mansfield dealer, am now getting marketing texts from a Lincoln dealer.

[DavieW]

9 hours ago, Urko said:

TV and radio "news" full of it being 40 years since Knobenders started.  I didn't watch the fucker 40 years ago and I have zero interest now, and it isn't news.

Don't forget the "live" edition going out on Thursday(?). All the media are wetting themselves over this "live" event and how amazing, difficult etc it's going to be. Have they never been to the theatre and seen an hour and a half  live play/musical/drama?

[comfortablynumb]

Because that takes 'real' actors @DavieW?

[sheffcortinacentre]

It's had the same story lines from the beginning ,same in all soaps just different location.

Bad boy/girl arrives broke /homeless, within a week great job, nice home fit partner,

Or as above wannabe gangster 

[Pieman]

1 minute ago, sheffcortinacentre said:

It's had the same story lines from the beginning ,same in all soaps just different location.

Bad boy/girl arrives broke /homeless, within a week great job, nice home fit partner,

Or as above wannabe gangster 

And all male characters are violent abusers and cheats, don't forget that.

[Pieman]

3 hours ago, artdjones said:

Friends of mine went to a wedding near Toxteth thirty five years ago and the whole shop was walled of behind perspex walls. You pointed, they got your order together, you pushed your money through a small slot, and they pushed the goods out through a bigger one. 

I thought in Toxteth the shop owner shot the customer first, just to be on the safe side?

(sorry, but I'm in that sort of mood tonight)

[Popsicle]

4 hours ago, artdjones said:

Friends of mine went to a wedding near Toxteth thirty five years ago and the whole shop was walled of behind perspex walls. You pointed, they got your order together, you pushed your money through a small slot, and they pushed the goods out through a bigger one. 

My uncle worked for White Arrow in the early 90's - His area was Toxteth, 3 men in a van, grills on the windows. One stayed in the van at all times, the other two did the deliveries.

[wuvvum]

Windows - fuck off and stop offering to rewrite everything I type with Copilot.  I don't need help from AI to type bollocks on a car forum thank you very much.

[reb]

24 minutes ago, wuvvum said:

Windows - fuck off and stop offering to rewrite everything I type with Copilot.  I don't need help from AI to type bollocks on a car forum thank you very much.

Come to the dark side! We even have working sound now!

[vulgalour]

You may be pleased to hear that you can uninstall Copilot and Windows will still work just fine without it.  If it insists on installing itself you can just uninstall it again.

Linux is great in theory, you just have to really want to piss about with computers and most of us don't.  Eventually I will learn how to install it on my laptop so it doesn't matter if it goes wrong, can't take the risk with the work pc, if Linux fucks something up I can't earn and Linux will fuck something up.

 

[reb]

1 minute ago, vulgalour said:

if Windows fucks something up I can't earn and Windows will fuck something up.

The distro I use at the moment is an enterprise system (still Free) and in the three months I've been using it (for work) it has not fucked up in any way.

Absolutely no pissing about required for a standard setup.

[Metal Guru]

6 hours ago, Pieman said:

And all male characters are violent abusers and cheats, don't forget that.

Other soap story line rules:

No one works more than 100 yards from their house, whether it be the market, pub, or knicker factory.
The soap’s hard man will normally own a garage and all male characters are always able to get work as a mechanic regardless of previous job experience.

Any businesses must be owned by two people who are sworn enemies. Some individuals have stakes in multiple businesses but owning a business outright is forbidden.

No one watches TV. Everyone spends every evening in the pub but there is only one alcoholic. Common people drink beer , posh people wine.

No one owns a washing machine , everyone must use the launderette.

Despite all the soaps having a garage , no one has a car, or if they do, the only purpose it’s used for is a fatal crash.

The murder rate is on a par with a latin American ghetto, but still much lower than Midsomer.

The most unattractive man, has had the most wives/ lovers.

When any one leaves , it is with 2hours notice, ( but enough time to arrange a leaving do ), all their possessions fit in two bin bags , they leave by taxi  and are never spoken about, although they may re-appear 10 or more years later, with or without the same head.

Everyone does all their food shopping at the corner shop which explains why the Websters in Corrie had beans on toast for tea for 20 years.

Most actors in Eastenders or Corrie made their way  from Grange Hill via The Bill , and will probably go via Emmerdale to Hollyoaks as their career peters out. Sadly the next steps to Doctors and onto Last of the Summer Wine are no longer available.

[Mrcento]

12 hours ago, High Jetter said:

You think that's bad? Small Sainsbury round here even has security  tags on red wine - non alcoholic variety! 

A shop near me has their cheese and jars of coffee in locked security boxes.

[New POD]

12 hours ago, comfortablynumb said:

😱

It's not so bad these days. At least not the bits closest to the city centre. 

[comfortablynumb]

12 hours ago, Pieman said:

I thought in Toxteth the shop owner shot the customer first, just to be on the safe side?

(sorry, but I'm in that sort of mood tonight)

Ex BIL was a Scouse, one night we ended up driving through toxteth.

I've seen tidier warzones on TV.

He was known for his bullshit, but stated ' if someone tries to stop you, if you can't get round them, run them over, there's a gang hiding behind the nearest wall!' 🥺

[artdjones]

6 hours ago, Metal Guru said:

Most actors in Eastenders or Corrie made their way  from Grange Hill via The Bill , and will probably go via Emmerdale to Hollyoaks as their career peters out. Sadly the next steps to Doctors and onto Last of the Summer Wine are no longer available.

Heartbeat has gone, too. I read last week that Corrie actors are down to £500 per episode, and that there's talk of cutting down the number of episodes pw. 

I remember the first episode of Emmerdale, in 1972, one of the original shows for afternoon telly. It really was a simple story of farming folk. Of course, many years later it was all murders, and aeroplanes crashing onto the roof of the Woolpack.

[Pieman]

8 hours ago, Metal Guru said:

Other soap story line rules:

No one works more than 100 yards from their house, whether it be the market, pub, or knicker factory.
The soap’s hard man will normally own a garage and all male characters are always able to get work as a mechanic regardless of previous job experience.

Any businesses must be owned by two people who are sworn enemies. Some individuals have stakes in multiple businesses but owning a business outright is forbidden.

No one watches TV. Everyone spends every evening in the pub but there is only one alcoholic. Common people drink beer , posh people wine.

No one owns a washing machine , everyone must use the launderette.

Despite all the soaps having a garage , no one has a car, or if they do, the only purpose it’s used for is a fatal crash.

The murder rate is on a par with a latin American ghetto, but still much lower than Midsomer.

The most unattractive man, has had the most wives/ lovers.

When any one leaves , it is with 2hours notice, ( but enough time to arrange a leaving do ), all their possessions fit in two bin bags , they leave by taxi  and are never spoken about, although they may re-appear 10 or more years later, with or without the same head.

Everyone does all their food shopping at the corner shop which explains why the Websters in Corrie had beans on toast for tea for 20 years.

You forgot "everyone can walk into anyone else's house through the back door unannounced, but if they have something bad/nasty to announce or a Bombshell (tm) they knock on the front door."

It's bizarre isn't it - they're like little socialist enclaves where "Outside" is a land forbidden even of discussion, and the scriptwriters and directors are Big Brother playing with all the characters' lives and keeping them as downtrodden as possible.  Fascinatingly dystopian.

[Metal Guru]

33 minutes ago, Pieman said:

You forgot "everyone can walk into anyone else's house through the back door unannounced, but if they have something bad/nasty to announce or a Bombshell (tm) they knock on the front door."

It's bizarre isn't it - they're like little socialist enclaves where "Outside" is a land forbidden even of discussion, and the scriptwriters and directors are Big Brother playing with all the characters' lives and keeping them as downtrodden as possible.  Fascinatingly dystopian.

Eastenders very occasionally mention “up west”, a phrase no one in London has said since the 70s, and Emmerdale characters sometimes go to the metropolis of Hotten, usually if drugs are involved.

Corrie characters used to venture into “town” occasionally usually for a posh romantic meal at the Clock restaurant , but these days they can’t be arsed to go further than Nick’s Bistro.

Also I forgot , if you’ve got a secret like an affair or you murdered someone, you talk to someone about it in the cafe or pub so people can eavesdrop rather than somewhere private.

 

[sierraman]

8 hours ago, Metal Guru said:

Other soap story line rules:

No one works more than 100 yards from their house, whether it be the market, pub, or knicker factory.
The soap’s hard man will normally own a garage and all male characters are always able to get work as a mechanic regardless of previous job experience.

Any businesses must be owned by two people who are sworn enemies. Some individuals have stakes in multiple businesses but owning a business outright is forbidden.

No one watches TV. Everyone spends every evening in the pub but there is only one alcoholic. Common people drink beer , posh people wine.

No one owns a washing machine , everyone must use the launderette.

Despite all the soaps having a garage , no one has a car, or if they do, the only purpose it’s used for is a fatal crash.

The murder rate is on a par with a latin American ghetto, but still much lower than Midsomer.

The most unattractive man, has had the most wives/ lovers.

When any one leaves , it is with 2hours notice, ( but enough time to arrange a leaving do ), all their possessions fit in two bin bags , they leave by taxi  and are never spoken about, although they may re-appear 10 or more years later, with or without the same head.

Everyone does all their food shopping at the corner shop which explains why the Websters in Corrie had beans on toast for tea for 20 years.

Most actors in Eastenders or Corrie made their way  from Grange Hill via The Bill , and will probably go via Emmerdale to Hollyoaks as their career peters out. Sadly the next steps to Doctors and onto Last of the Summer Wine are no longer available.

Murders are rarely if ever followed up. If someone gets gunned down in the square in front of several witnesses the perpetrator just goes away for a few weeks and comes back and it’s all forgotten about. I suppose it’s escapism for people isn’t it, if it was humdrum like Dot Cotton waiting on the phone to the Pensions people for 45 minutes or half an hour of watching Jack Duckworth do the crossword nobody would watch it. 

[sierraman]

1 hour ago, artdjones said:

Heartbeat has gone, too. I read last week that Corrie actors are down to £500 per episode, and that there's talk of cutting down the number of episodes pw. 

I remember the first episode of Emmerdale, in 1972, one of the original shows for afternoon telly. It really was a simple story of farming folk. Of course, many years later it was all murders, and aeroplanes crashing onto the roof of the Woolpack.

Brookside was quite good, every few years they’d have a cull. Invariably some sort of bomb going off. 

[artdjones]

Just now, sierraman said:

Brookside was quite good, every few years they’d have a cull. Invariably some sort of bomb going off. 

I think that there'd been a killing in every house on the close by the end.

[horriblemercedes]

17 minutes ago, sierraman said:

Murders are rarely if ever followed up. If someone gets gunned down in the square in front of several witnesses the perpetrator just goes away for a few weeks and comes back and it’s all forgotten about. I suppose it’s escapism for people isn’t it, if it was humdrum like Dot Cotton waiting on the phone to the Pensions people for 45 minutes or half an hour of watching Jack Duckworth do the crossword nobody would watch it. 

Exactly. I think the problem is that no one wants a half hour video of Curly Watts' bathroom door as he craps his guts out after 10 pints of lager and a curry

 

But it is fun to make the observations

[Pieman]

One thing I wonder is if EastEnders or Coronation Street ever end...how will they do it?  I believe Brookside ended with a shot of one character walking away down the close with all the houses boarded up?

Maybe the ending is that Coronation Street or Albert Square are served a compulsory purchase order to build something like a large stadium or something similar, and the last few weeks of the series are the residents gradually leaving.  Eventually there is just one character left, and the very last scene sees that character tearfully and reluctantly leaving their house for the last time before walking away down the street.  As they do so, sad music begins to play, and the camera pans out across the rooftops while brief highlight clips from over the years are superimposed over the shot.  I think that would be a nice way to end.

[mercedade]

 

[horriblemercedes]

Just now, mercedade said:

 

I seriously don't know why that's funny, but it cracked me up

[motorpunk]

11 hours ago, Mrcento said:

A shop near me has their cheese and jars of coffee in locked security boxes.

Leicester Greggs had security on the door earlier this week. Once one of the best cities in the world to live in, apparently. Mostly a shit hole now.