The grumpy thread

[ruffgeezer]

Piss Frisbees are better.

[Brodders]

Piss Frisbees are better.

What is a "Piss Frisbee"? Just for future reference.

[dugong]

Piazza? Peterborough?

 

Congratulations!

LOL.

 

318is, Trafford Park.

[richbraith]

I have to start work at 2.15pm on a Friday.

[dave21478]

What is a "Piss Frisbee"? Just for future reference.

 

piss on a dinnerplate and freeze it, then slip the disc of frozen piss under the offending persons door so it melts on their carpet.

 

Except I dont know what temperature piss freezes at, and since its not the 1840's anymore people tend not to have large gaps under their front doors.

[HillmanImp]

Whats this shit all about.

 

This chap made a hoax phone call pretending that someone was going kidnapped resulting in some police officers having to ring someone when they got home safely and got sent down for 7 years:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-birmingham-36399687

 

This chap drove like a dick in a deliberate act of road rage and managed to paralyse 2 innocent children in the process and gets four and a half.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-36396341

 

WTF?

 

Our country is fucked up. Stuff like this just makes me want to leave.

[nebuchenezer]

Having just returned from a relaxing* holiday on a Greek island I feel I have to pass comment on the younger generation that inhabits this sceptred isle.

 

When did it become acceptable to go on holiday and basically not give a flying fuck about the hotel owner - yay! lets piss on the stairs/any random spot other than the toilet - not give a flying fuck about other residents in the hotel - cue screaming, swearing, shouting as the pissed up twats came staggering home at 3 in the morning - and not give a fuck about the locals/history etc. - cue lines of broken and discarded bottles leading from hotel to beach and general statements when out of "this place is shit, there's no fish and chips available", "where's the fuken karaoke bar, I cant stabd this greek shit music"

 

I could go on and on but I won't

 

Suffice to say, wedding party from Hastings, thanks a bunch for embarrassing me and my once proud land - you truly epitomise the scum of the earth.

 

(Other areas of GB are available as well)

 

Also,

 

We got back yesterday just in time for my partners mum to have a stroke - GAH!

[Station]

What a complete twat. Stereotypical modern penis extension Land Rover owner road rages and attempts to chase a female and ends up paralysing two young girls by driving into their oncoming car. C U N T

 

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-36396341

[strangeangel]

What a complete twat. Stereotypical modern penis extension Land Rover owner road rages and attempts to chase a female and ends up paralysing two young girls by driving into their oncoming car. C U N T

 

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-36396341

 

I'm sure I heard on the radio he only got a six year driving ban - what do you have to do to get banned for life FFS??

[MarvinsMom]

and whats worse the unfit for purpose joke of a justice "system" only locked the bastard up for 4.5 years, with a 4 year driving ban!!

 

what a fuckin' joke.

[chaseracer]

The four-year ban starts AFTER he gets out - and then he has to take an extended retest.

[eddyramrod]

Marvin's Mom: Totally.

 

Meanwhile, hay fever.  Oh yeah, that was a good idea, coming on top of asthma, wasn't it?  Just breathing at all has been a challenge for 55 years!  I really don't need seasonal poisoning.

 

Also, local one-man garages.  If the bloke's good, he gets lots of work.  If he's good, he gets my work.  So, by recommendation from Facebook, I found such a garage, three and a half years ago, and have been using him ever since.  But slow?  Fuck me, even I could do better with the garage he's got.  I certainly would have had my Saab sorted out by now.  I left it there on Wednesday for a couple of little jobs.  This is the umpteenth time, by the way, for the same jobs that he "hasn't had time to do" yet.  They're MoT-sensitive, and that runs out in a fortnight.  Dropped in this afternoon and it hasn't moved.  Meanwhile other cars have come and gone.  I know that because he's across the road from work, I see it happening.  FFS man, do the jobs you already have!

 

Oh and before the decorator comes on Monday to wallpaper the back room, MrsR has decided I need to repaint all the woodwork I painted white three years ago.  And rub it down first.  In a house where nobody smokes, so the white will take decades rather than minutes to go yellow.  I suppose I should be doing it now, but fuck it, I've had a frustrating day, I don't care.

 

Actually I do, that's the real trouble.

 

Grump grump grumpitty grump.

[Mr_Bo11ox]

That knobhead in the Range Rover has been sacked from his job an all and JLR have publicly disowned him. What a bell end

[eddyramrod]

Oh FFS!  I just heard sandpapering noises so went down to investigate.  There's my beloved, starting to rub down some of the paintwork, with no preparation whatever, and her freshly-made cuppa between her and the job.

 

I really can't deal with that level of impatience, not after the day I've had.

[scaryoldcortina]

Some eejit drove the PRI-DAH all the way up to Scary's Yard from Newburn with not enough water in and melted the water pump seal.

 

Oh, yeah.  That was me.

 

Still, it'll be something to be proud soon.  Right?

I ordered a waterpump yesterday (on ebay because no hurry and half the price of a get-it-today pump) and it arrived today!

 

 

Spot the problem! Clue - the part number on the box is correct.

[fordperv]

Oh dear has someone put the wrong pump in the box?

[scaryoldcortina]

yes they have. I've already received a full refund and they don't want it returned, so anyone who needs it and can identify it can have the damn thing for cost of postage.

 

the picture on the listing was this

 

 

which is the correct pump.

[nebuchenezer]

Marvin's Mom: Totally.

 

Meanwhile, hay fever.  Oh yeah, that was a good idea, coming on top of asthma, wasn't it?  Just breathing at all has been a challenge for 55 years!  I really don't need seasonal poisoning.

 

Also, local one-man garages.  If the bloke's good, he gets lots of work.  If he's good, he gets my work.  So, by recommendation from Facebook, I found such a garage, three and a half years ago, and have been using him ever since.  But slow?  Fuck me, even I could do better with the garage he's got.  I certainly would have had my Saab sorted out by now.  I left it there on Wednesday for a couple of little jobs.  This is the umpteenth time, by the way, for the same jobs that he "hasn't had time to do" yet.  They're MoT-sensitive, and that runs out in a fortnight.  Dropped in this afternoon and it hasn't moved.  Meanwhile other cars have come and gone.  I know that because he's across the road from work, I see it happening.  FFS man, do the jobs you already have!

 

Oh and before the decorator comes on Monday to wallpaper the back room, MrsR has decided I need to repaint all the woodwork I painted white three years ago.  And rub it down first.  In a house where nobody smokes, so the white will take decades rather than minutes to go yellow.  I suppose I should be doing it now, but fuck it, I've had a frustrating day, I don't care.

 

Actually I do, that's the real trouble.

 

Grump grump grumpitty grump.

Modern gloss will go yelow within 5 years.

[vulgalour]

Wasn't entirely sure at first but on closer inspection tonight it looks like someone has bumped the front of the Rover.  Headlight pushed back a smidge, indicator clip broken, grille out of alignment.  It can all be realigned and even to the trained eye (mine) it's not glaringly obvious something is amiss.  It probably happened on my last trip to the shops as it was one of the rare times I couldn't park out of the way of other shoppers.  What a nuisance.

[DeeJay]

Oh FFS!  I just heard sandpapering noises so went down to investigate.  There's my beloved, starting to rub down some of the paintwork, with no preparation whatever, and her freshly-made cuppa between her and the job.

 

I really can't deal with that level of impatience, not after the day I've had.

Let her crack on with it (and don't criticise unless you want to make your own tea for a week).

[dollywobbler]

yes they have. I've already received a full refund and they don't want it returned, so anyone who needs it and can identify it can have the damn thing for cost of postage.

 

the picture on the listing was this

 

 

which is the correct pump.

 

I've had this. Ordered a BX water pump, received one for a Ford Fiesta/Escort 1.6 diesel. Funnily enough, they didn't want that one back either. I've still got it.

[vulgalour]

Won't be going to the west coast to see Eddy today for a fun day out because this morning has been a shambles and I haven't enough time to get back after meeting up to do what I need to do here in the evening.  Was looking forward to the run out and seeing Eddy and his big brown car.  Being a grown-up sucks.

[dave21478]

Mobile phone shite-hawks.

Got a letter in the post this morning....Hey there! look how wonderful we are with all this new pish we are adding to our options....you can pay a subscription to be able to view sports events on your telephone and 4 other pointless bollocks you have no interest in. Oh and since we are so fantastic we are giving you one of these options for FREE, yes now you can dowload up to 5 newspapers or magasines per month from our list and read them on your telephone. For FREE. arent we generous?!

 

Well, none of that is of any interest to me, but whatever.

 

Then the last two lines at the bottom of the page... In order to continue providing such fantastic service, all tarrifs will go up by one Euro a month.

 

MOTHERFUCKERS. Fucking parasites. I only pay 5 euros a month, so I now have a mandatory 20% increase in my bill for something I never asked for, dont want and will never use.

[xtriple]

I just bought a new laptop inline from Currys. I was amazed to find I already have an account with them so carried on, paid and selected delivery for tomorrow morning. It wasn't until the confirmation e-mail came through that I realised it was going to deliver to my old address, where I haven't resided for three years!

 

Phoned up, cancelled (my only option) and then changed everything on their site and re-ordered.

 

I await with interest to see if they charge me twice.... bet they do!

 

 

 

 

Note: I need a new laptop as the keys are so worn you cannot see the letters anymore and three of them are missing after I hoovered it the other day! Been waiting for a cheap deal for ages.

[Lacquer Peel]

You can replace the keyboard you know.

[cort16]

tipex

[Pillock]

They will charge you twice, as you've bought it twice. One will get refunded so it's fine but the payment was likely authorised as soon as you hit the button so it's in the hands of the bank. Currys send the refund notice as soon as they cancel the order.

[Eddie Honda]

*awaits xtriple's grump about this newfangled Windows is bollox*

[xtriple]

I am a proper 'technophobe' it must be said. This poor old thing is now 7-8 years old and properly fooked: when Chester was a pup, he used to walk all over the keyboard (he's not good at being careful either!) and so several keys came off and have been replaced, It has been used so much (fuck off whichever ones of you that suggested 'I shouldn't post so much drivel then!'    ) the letters have all worn away and it is getting slow.

 

But, it still works!

 

Mate lent me another one a while back when this was playing up and I never even turned it on as it used a different OS - this thing is still on Windows XP (home basic!). I was sure it was going to die last year so I transferred all my pictures and stuff to a memory stick, but then it bucked its ideas up again and it has been reprieved....

 

Terrified of having to remember passwords and stuff for all the sites I use, internet banking as well .... argh!

 

 

 

Anyway, I have just watched an lady (90?) in a Peugeot 206CC try to park. I waited patiently for her as she scared the shit out of me. The space she was trying to get into is the loading bay for the Co-op where they get artics in no problem and she couldn't do it! She ended up on the pavement right in the middle of the space. She got out of her car so I thought I was safe to park (easy in the portion she'd left) but then she got back in and drove off! I stayed in the car... just in case.

[Parky]

Why did I say I would remove the conifer stumps myself?

 

One was a piece of piss, the next one has roots off roots off roots and despite the fact it's wobbling, the bastard will not come out. Anyone in Essex with a chainsaw and an interest in a few quid in their pocket is welcome to PM me

 

Or rent me the chainsaw for a few hours, that would be good too!