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Panda Alessi: The Pandarin


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Posted
2 minutes ago, jollysmart said:

I haven't asked but I thought with it being new they may ship it directly to Jersey, rather than you having to arrange delivery of something you bought here?

I didn't see Jersey on the drop down menu.

  • 2 weeks later...
Posted

I think he knows about Tac... This one being Tic.

Long convoluted story. But I needed to dump the Alessi at work as that's where the Cactus was which has my tools inside.

 

Alessi wouldn't open with the remote.... Absolutely fucking flat. I have a boost pack.... In the cactus.

  • 3 weeks later...
Posted

When pandas attack!!! Emotionally at least.

 

He’s been flat for a while, but will jump. At least he did a fortnight ago. I decide to jump it and take it for a run. I get 20 feet “abs failure, power steering failure, ebd failure "

I have no power steering, which is fun... 

It probably needs a new battery, however the earth-to-gearbox strap corrode.  Which requires removal of the battery tray and I can't be bothered.  I'll try and trickle charge the battery overnight.

 

I left it idling for 15 minutes... eat my co2 Greta Cuntberg and he wouldn't start.

 

I do earn brownie points for this tri-Panda shot.

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Posted

I found with mine that changing the battery sorted it but in true style it paid me back by then doing the same thing about a week later and never again until I changed the battery for a new one when once more it  went about a week until it did the same thing. Mine has an alarm fitted which also drains the battery quite quickly to give added hilarity.

It could just be the system sorting itself out with a change of battery  as they seem to like a bit of Italian drama.

New batteries are cheap enough  so I go for that option ASAP otherwise you are likely to have all of the fun* in a short while.

  • Thanks 1
  • 3 weeks later...
Posted
9 minutes ago, Kringle said:

@Aston Martin

There's an orange alessi on Facebook for 400 quid, Brighton. Have you seen it?

 

Listed as an Eleganza. Steering light should be battery, however "scraping whilst steering" hmm... Could be the steering motor.

Posted

That’s a bargain isn’t it, apart from the fact the only person that would actually want an Alessi already has two :D 

If someone local to it was able to stash it for a bit I’d take it on....

  • Haha 1
Posted

I'm messaging her now. Free train travel for me so distance isn't too much of a problem!

Could be steering pump, maybe even top mounts not sure yet.

  • Like 3
Posted
1 minute ago, Kringle said:

I'm messaging her now. Free train travel for me so distance isn't too much of a problem!

Could be steering pump, maybe even top mounts not sure yet.

Ah amazing, I’m interested but sadly away this week. I’d love it if you don’t. 

  • Like 1
Posted
33 minutes ago, Kringle said:

I'm messaging her now. Free train travel for me so distance isn't too much of a problem!

Could be steering pump, maybe even top mounts not sure yet.

 

If it's been stood, I'd say battery. Which is why mine hasn't moved in a month. ?

Posted

She's only been doing 1500-2000 miles a year. However, the car hasn't been cleaned or maybe moved in a while due to the moss everywhere.

Needs a new front bumper, it's a standard Panda one. What intrigues me is the lack of lacquer peel. All orange ones have peel ?

 

If it were listed as an Alessi, she might get more for it...

Posted
32 minutes ago, Aston Martin said:

It sold... Did we get it? @Kringle

I was just gonna message about that one when it posted up sold. 

  • Like 1
Posted

Nope, the first person who messaged came this morning and bought it. Probably a trader... Nuts.

  • Sad 2
Posted

Definitely Battery, Mrs P’s 500 did exactly the same when the battery died in that.  Never seen so many error messages in one go!

  • Like 1
Posted

Collecting a Bosch S4 battery today and I need to take it to a £5 Uzbekistan car wash.

Posted

The old battery was a Lion eurocarwanks special I assume. It sloshed about like buggary. The new battery is smaller and yet has 4ah more. ?

He didn't fire up straight away and "ABS/EBD FAILURE ENGINE OFF IMMEDIATELY!!!!!!!?!?!!?!?!!?"  So, I turned the engine off and on..., "ABS EBD failure, the car is going to explode, engine fucking off!!!!!!!!!"
 

I tried lock to lock and it did nothing, I drove 10 feet and the lights vanished. Here's the thing, the car feels soo much lighter than the 4x4. It actually moves from a standstill, unlike the 4x4. The brakes are binding to hell and I need to lob some air in the tyres. I may treat him to a £10 car wash.

 

Posted

It sounds like you really don't like that 4x4 man. Are they MEANT to be slow or is the slowness unexpected in yours?

Posted
11 minutes ago, Jim Bell said:

It sounds like you really don't like that 4x4 man. Are they MEANT to be slow or is the slowness unexpected in yours?

They're slow as buggar normally, I suspect the winter tyres don't help,

Posted

Good to know. I really fancy one, one day. Ideally once the values plummet into shite territory. 

Posted

I forgot about the non-removable valve caps... So I had to remove the wheeltrims like a lunatic. 

 

Because it's a £10 minimum Myanmar car wash, on the outskirts of town... Infront of me was an E55 AMG and behind me a brand new 8-series. ?

 

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