What makes you grin? Antidote to grumpy thread

[Claypole]

Polo I'm selling has 12 months MOT now to stick it to the txt spkrs moaning it only had a month left.

[Station]

Manchester is a piece of piss compared to Brum, London at rush hour is a positively chilled out experience.

I remember being scared when I drove through London at around 10pm. I thought someone was going to shoot me. A black fellow was riding on a bike and collided with my car. He took the opportunity to point out it was my fault. He threw the bike on the floor and start saying 'What's your problem yeah? What's your problem yeah?'. Fuck knows, mate. I can see your problem is you falling into an extreme stereotype you fucking cunt. I probably would've got away with driving over his body with his bike underneath him, getting some strange thrill out of hearing bone and metal cracking. I don't know what it is with people trying to intimidate the driver of the car that's running and is about 1 foot from the bumper. Twat!

[Lankytim]

Everytime I return to Brum to visit my parents I always arrive in a foul mood because ive been cut up/honked at/ run off the road several times. It usually starts just as you exit the M6 and get onto the Aston Expressway.I dont really agree that standards in Liverpool are much better though. Its a stressful place for a lorryist!

[Parky]

Had second interview for dream job today. Went OK but didnt think I'd been particularly brilliant (nerves, unusual for me). Anyway, consultant calls me to say "nice work, they want to see you for lunch tomorrow - they're paying!"Ah yes, this makes me smile. If nothing else, its a free lunch and thats never a bad thing!

[Mr H Sceptre]

Sounds like you've got it in the bag Parky.

[Parky]

Ah, wouldnt say that. There's a fourth interview after this one apparently. I'm wondering if this is some kind of test - i.e if they pay that makes me a tightarse and not a team player, but if I insist on paying, it makes me a try hard, etc. Or they might just want to buy me lunch to chat about stuff of course...

[Pete-M]

Has just been promoted in work Less work, more wedge. Whoop!

[seth]

Nearly as good as all this uplifting career news, I had a Kit-kat earlier today and it seemed to have missed the biscuit machine so was almost 100% chocolate.

[Pete-M]

I had a Kit-kat earlier today and it seemed to have missed the biscuit machine so was almost 100% chocolate.

They're brilliant. Only had one once but remember the choccy tasted really 'not as expected', but in a good way.I'd kill for a bag of orange Revels. Bloody coffee ones are just meanies, number of times I've thought "ooooh, oraaaaaaarghh", and I like coffee. Just not in a bag of sweets.

[Alpineandy]

Finally got myself back into some sort of employment. Nothing spectacular but at least it keeps me away from the Job Centre.

You're not a LibDem MP are you ?

[Mr H Sceptre]

Finally got myself back into some sort of employment. Nothing spectacular but at least it keeps me away from the Job Centre.

You're not a LibDem MP are you ?

....except Lembit Opik.

[Pillock]

I'd kill for a bag of orange Revels. Bloody coffee ones are just meanies, number of times I've thought "ooooh, oraaaaaaarghh", and I like coffee. Just not in a bag of sweets.

If you get the fondant-sized ones, and roll them across a table, the coffee ones roll further as the filling is more dense. You can thus safely eat the ones closest to you

[wuvvum]

Finally got myself back into some sort of employment. Nothing spectacular but at least it keeps me away from the Job Centre.

You're not a LibDem MP are you ?

....except Lembit Opik.

I have a feeling he's going to be popping up every time I turn on the TV for the next few months. After his stint on last week's HIGNFY, he appeared on Newsnight last night, sat next to some bloke dressed up as a dolphin. He appears to be one of these people who has absolutely no sense of shame and will do anything just to stay in the public eye. People like that tend to become very irritating very quickly.Sorry, bit of a grump there.

[Cavcraft]

Plus he was shagging one of the Cheeky Girls and that Welsh bint weather girl who applied her make up with a machine gun, so not such a GR8 CV for him methinks.Last day in Scouseville tomorrow and it's been a blast. Quite possibly the only course I've been on I really enjoyed.

[Pillock]

Speaking of courses, I had a conversation with my new boss... seems in my training outfit, it would be handy to see other parts of the business. She asked me where, the most exotic I could think of was the contact centre we have in Nottingham. 25 miles away.Ten minutes later she's arranging two weeks worth of travelling around visiting people pretending to be important, on 35p/mile or a hire car. London, Bristol and somewhere near Newcastle are on the cards I think which will make a nice drive.Sometimes, I quite like my shit job.

[Lankytim]

I have to confess im not a fan of the Liberal Democrat party but I do like Limpet Optrex, Vince Cable and Nick Clegg. They do seem a fun bunch! Limp bizkit I thought was quite funny on HIGNFY. Be honest, would you kick one of the cheeky girls out of bed? Even that weather girl isnt bad.

[Guest]

Nearly as good as all this uplifting career news, I had a Kit-kat earlier today and it seemed to have missed the biscuit machine so was almost 100% chocolate.

I had that happen with a Morrisons "Break" (counterfeit KitKat) in around 1996.Anyway, I love driving around in the early morning when there's no one about, just been through Ossett/Horbury and it was just me. Didn't even see a single pedestrian, let alone another driver. Very atmospheric!I should get a job on nights, I reckon I would relish the opportunity to hide away from the bulk of the general public.

[Parky]

I think you are turning into Travis Bickle Hirst!

[mk1_4dr]

I've always said that late night driving is what I pay my road tax for. There really is nothing better than cruising around, not seeing a soul for hours at a time.For instance, last Tuesday night we were sat around talking at 11pm-ish and decided to head for the east coast. By the time we'd popped to a mates house for supplies and tanked the car up at the 24hour Sainsburys in Wakefield it was midnight but then we were stood on Filey seafront at quarter to 1, and I wasn't driving silly fast, just a steady pace. You can't do that mid afternoon.I think all the way back (which took in a blast down the coast to drive through Brid') we got stuck behind one car. Thats one car in 90ish miles. Granted on the '62 on the way back we were passing trucks like they were parked, so I must have been pressing on at that stage....I will have to do more of it, it certainly took my mind of other stuff.

[brammy777]

Managing to find this old story on the web, I remember when it was in the paper! Sadly no photos of the consul. Wonder what happened to the woman....

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/1863143.stm

[seth]

A pair of WW2 fighter planes flew over the 'burbs at very low altitude about 1/2 hour ago. Didn't see them close enough to know what they were but they were making the right noises

[dollywobbler]

A pair of WW2 fighter planes flew over the 'burbs at very low altitude about 1/2 hour ago. Didn't see them close enough to know what they were but they were making the right noises

I was in your London village last night but couldn't get my camera out quickly enough to snap a really ratty Triumph 2000 estate driving down Kensington High Street at about half eleven. It was epically shabby and in the sodium lighting, looked to have been brush painted.

[Parky]

Interview number three - mission accomplished!Interview four lined up for next week. 50 candidates, and two remain including myself. Even if I dont get it, thats not a bad show. Either I must be better than I give myself credit for or everyone else must be REALLY shit!

[barrett]

Good work Parky!i'm happy because tonight is my last shift until the 23rd, this is my 5th night on and i'm knackered. Doesn't sound like much, but any one who works nights will know that it really takes it out of you, and I haven't seen daylight since last saturday. I'll be going out for a few choice ales tomorrow night for a friend's birthday, and meeting up with dutch_grrl...and then deciding how i'm going to spend the next 8 days of freedom!

[barrett]

oh, and this!

[Cavcraft]

Nice one Parky, good luck chief.

[pogweasel]

Barratt, that is some ORSUM dust drawing. I am grinning today as I got a call at 11, can I attend a meeting at 1 re. "some" work, said yes but I'd have to be in scruffs because I'd be busy with other shit, expected to get maybe a couple of weeks out of it came away with 16 weeks work at very, very nice money. Well into 5 figures, and if it goes well possibly will get into the low sixes... Happy. And we sold the focus today, no bother or twattery at all, which is pleasing considering the general level of moronicness on ebay at the min.

[seth]

Nice one Pog/Parky.I'm having a good work week too. Nothing special. Just that things are going reasonably well.

[Parky]

Nice one Pog, thats very good to hear.

[ashmicro]

Having a good-natured slanging match with my (BMW driving) ex on Facebook. The whole thing ended up very MacDroitwich!