What makes you grin? Antidote to grumpy thread

[New POD]

Just got notice. Next Friday, I am to become American.

 

Phil

 

How do you qualify???

[Wack]

Theresa May asking other MP's to come round to number 10 to help her sort Brexit, kind of like Jeffrey Dahmer asking you to come and help him clean his fridge isn't it

https://youtu.be/XhIAjHs2d08

[PhilA]

How do you qualify???

I applied

 

Phil

[PhilA]

See here this clip of Phil during a hurricane :

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y8eL_DB-xBo

I wish I had that much hair.

 

Phil

[New POD]

I applied

 

Phil

Is there a box that says I'm not Mexican?

And another that says I'm not Muslim? And a third that says I confirm that I am white?

 

Just my biased understanding of the USA

 

Note: my sister is a resident alien

Her kids are US citizens as are her grand children and I was once offered a job there and seriously considered it.

 

You'll note I did not ask why. Just interested what criteria you fit?

[SierraMikeHotel]

Saw this on the breakfast news this morning, Mrs H was rolling her eyes before I'd even opened my mouth to celebrate

[andy18s]

476557A4-09A8-48E8-8BF1-374AF3408274.jpeg

That needs keeping for at least a couple of years for when they "forget" they cancelled it......

[adw1977]

I was very happy when I realised that this was my taxi from the airport in Langkawi, Malaysia. All the other taxis were boring moderns.

 

 

Behold the tiger print headlining and sun visors:

 

 

And the beige and brown vinyl seats:

 

[Kiltox]

 

No idea what “emissions to clean” means but I’m chuffed with that.

[Exiled_Tat_Gatherer]

Which vehicle fella? ……… C1?

Oh - and congratulations……. always a smile inducer

[bangernomics]

Idly looking on eBay at 2cv adverts as you do.

 

[Roobarb]

Now where’s that damn 7th gear...

Tyre error cos Snow tyres (with no pressure warning sensors).

Probably should have been driving at 77mph

[Kiltox]

Which vehicle fella? ……… C1?

Oh - and congratulations……. always a smile inducer

Van. First MoT.

 

Considering it’s dodgy past it’s good going.

[clayts450]

Successful annual insurance renewal dance with Tesco. Renewal quote £800+, confused.com Tesco quote £448. Ring Tesco, give them the quote number, they price match themselves, end call with 'speak to you again next year:, me winnah

[PhilA]

Is there a box that says I'm not Mexican?

And another that says I'm not Muslim? And a third that says I confirm that I am white?

Just my biased understanding of the USA

Note: my sister is a resident alien

Her kids are US citizens as are her grand children and I was once offered a job there and seriously considered it.

You'll note I did not ask why. Just interested what criteria you fit?

Sorry. There'd been so much gentle ribbing in previous posts, I had become used to it.

 

It does ask for ethnic background. I fall into the "not those ones" category (white male, thirties). That being said, last time I filled out a government form for the UK (passport renewal) it had the same "Ethnic group" question, with a very similar list as is used here.

 

Phil

[scaryoldcortina]

B2A8E19A-B8A4-464B-B9D5-5221D1004225.png

 

No idea what “emissions to clean” means but I’m chuffed with that.

It probably means that their obsolete* smoke meter failed to register a peak when the tester revved your van.

 

*Newer smoke meters have an obd connection so it can see that you revved as instructed but no smoke came out.

[Ghosty]

B2A8E19A-B8A4-464B-B9D5-5221D1004225.png

 

No idea what “emissions to clean” means but I’m chuffed with that.

It means you need to improve The Climate more.

[Kiltox]

It probably means that their obsolete* smoke meter failed to register a peak when the tester revved your van.

*Newer smoke meters have an obd connection so it can see that you revved as instructed but no smoke came out.

That’s basically what he said - “it was so far under the settings for your van that we couldn’t register a reading” or something.

 

Would’ve expected Halfords Autocentres to have the latest kit - lots of these chain types tend to spend big.

[scaryoldcortina]

Nah, they like to look like they spend big so you will.

[Kiltox]

Nah, they like to look like they spend big so you will.

Aye, that sounds about right.

 

£390 to replace front/rear pads and a tyre. Not bad if you can get it, eh?

[Guest Hooli]

Nah, they like to look like they spend big so you will.

 

At least all the staff are highly* trained

[MikeR]

high light of the day , to log on to security camera from work whilst having my get up cuppa ...

 

and see neighbours car outside the front of the house .........  all iced up

 

and owner busy with a scraper !

[Jazoli]

Must be a pretty boring day then

 

Tonight's grin for me is this

 

 

It must be intentional.

 

Just watched S3E1 and it's the same formula but better as they've got rid of the celebrity bit, it also makes me want a V8 more.

[Timewaster]

Pretty sure Amazon have done that on purpose.

 

Gets attention, posted, liked, retweeted...

 

You don't become world dominant billionaires by missing any available trick.

[FakeConcern]

Went to Tenterden Garden centre with my mother, daughter & wife (we know how to live!). That's not the grin though, just as we got out of the car, I heard something that sounded great changing down for the sharp bend and looked up to see it was a yellow Lotus Elite type 14!

[myglaren]

[richardmorris]

Fuck me, an actual apology!!!    I thought the season for miracles was behind us.

We live in very strange times. I’ve just seen boris Johnson denying it was him in a recording read back to him.

[richardmorris]

Idly looking on eBay at 2cv adverts as you do.

That very advert is why my local group is the Thames tortoises.

[Talbot]

*Newer smoke meters have an obd connection so it can see that you revved as instructed but no smoke came out.

Surely that is encroaching on the MOT test restriction of no intrustion/disassembly/interrogation of the vehicle? Any decent smoke meter should be able to tell if the engine was actualy revved or not due to the increase in flow of exhaust gasses. I think plugging into an OBD port is crossing a line.

 

Before you know it, it'll be an MOT check item to plug in, and if there are any fault codes present that will be a fail.

[scaryoldcortina]

Too late, already have to fail things if the engine light is on.