What makes you grin? Antidote to grumpy thread

[M'coli]

February, as Iain Banks so well described it in his novel "Complicity", has that look of all the colour having drained fom the world.  At the weekend, though, I took this photo of a solitary hawthorn:

 

Aye, that'll do.

[gm]

I had an offer accepted on a new house today can't wait to move out of this crappy flat I've been renting since me and mrs gm split up.

 

new house has a decent sized single garage which the current owner has converted to a gym (he boarded up over the garage door inside) that'll be the first thing to get ripped out. garage + driveway + plenty on street parking = wcpgw ?

[richardmorris]

http://youtu.be/TGc2nN9OguQ

[UmBongo]

What a fud.

 

[bub2006]

Volvo has a years ticket! Really happy now

[xtriple]

Had a good time up at Specialist cars. Coffee and biscuits (Foxes crunch creams bought specially for me!) and a good old wander around inside their unit. There were loads of Bentleys outside but as it was blowing several gales at once and sleeting on me, I gave the ones outside a very cursory glance and then darted back indoors!

 

Paul said that my old Turbo R has finally gone: Ireland is now its happy stomping ground, so the Irish contingent should hear the gnashing of teeth and wailing of open wallet surgery pretty soon!

 

Had a butchers at all the 'special tools' and the one that got my attention was a bar about two foot long with a shaped socket thing on one end. 'What the hell is that doing in there?'

'That is a special tool from Bentley for doing the (some valve, my attention is shit!) on the new Conti GTs. Totally inaccessible without it. £377! Honestly, it looked like an old breaker bar that had been given too much torque with a fork leg/scaffold tube and fucked socket welded on the end!

 

Also, looked at a beautiful (and mega rare) Bentley Corniche convertible  (99.9% were Rolls Royces) and it was one of the very last ones made. It was a deep blue metallic with cream hide inside with blue piping and a blue hood. It was lovely. Right next to it was a really early RR Corniche (fixed head) and while the bodies were pretty much the same, all the details were different. It looked a real period piece and had a 'charm' that the newer one lacked.

 

It had been in the owners garage when the place caught  fire and was mildy damaged by the heat but more by the smoke. So all the chromework on the front was away being re-done and the interior was out and with specialists being restored. It was lovely...

 

They have some lovely cars in there and a few old heaps: there was a Turbo R on the ramp as it's suspension had shit itself (like mine did) and instead of having all the active ride stuff replaced, the owner was going for the el cheapo route and having coilovers fitted (the kit is a grand including VAT instead of the £4.5K for the active ride genuine stuff) and to be honest, the car was a bloody mess. Rust everywhere on the body,specially the front wings and I could see the reason for 'cheaping out'. But, the owner has had it since time began, leaves it outside untouched for months on end then expects it to start and go to Spain or somewhere at the drop of a hat. So while he doesn't give a rats arse about the looks of the thing, mechanically and interior wise, it is well cared for. Oh, and it's done 230 thousand miles!

 

That I guess, is proper 'old money'

 

The fuel bill alone for that would sort out the NHS!

 

Oh and they 'seem' to have fixed my starting problem - all relays out and contacts cleaned, all checked out and, touch wood, it's been fine ever since....

 

Sorry for the long and boring post.

[cort1977]

Not boring at all, who on here doesn't like hearing about knackered Bentleys?

 

I read some magazine article years ago in that posh classics magazine interviewing a proper old Bentley type who was in to building his own specials.   He said something like 'cars or people shouldn't be washed too often or the dogs get confused'.  

[Tickman]

Got three of these metal drawer cabinets today for £15. 

Very heavy and designed to bolt under a bench so that is where they will be going.

 

[castros_bro]

Someone just commented on my tea making facilities

 

 

 " if Rover made kitchen appliances"

 

[cort16]

The P6 passed it's MOT first time

 

 

[saucedoctor]

Dunno if this should be grin, grump or whatever: I was in the local motor factors earlier and one of their lads told me he was making a parts delivery this morning to a local "garage". He saw one of the staff putting spark plugs in with a fucking windy-gun.  

[strangeangel]

 one of the staff putting spark plugs in with a fucking windy-gun.  

 

Based on that I imagine he cleans his teeth with an angle grinder! I don't know who's a bigger cabbage - him, or the twat who trained him.

[MarvinsMom]

^^i think you should name this kwaliti* establishment so that the rest of us can avoid it like the plague!!

[anonymous user]

I retire in a few weeks, I am taking advantage by now sometimes saying what I really think, rather than the usual carefully thought out, politically correct, answer. It's quite theraputic and I want to make sure that by the time I go everyone hates me so that there is no leaving do.

[320touring]

The P6 passed it's MOT first time

 

Hope you had the courtesy to drop off a chew toy for the testers dog;)

 

Would be good to see the p6 at a scotoshite one evening!

[320touring]

I retire in a few weeks, I am taking advantage by now sometimes saying what I really think, rather than the usual carefully thought out, politically correct, answer. It's quite theraputic and I want to make sure that by the time I go everyone hates me so that there is no leaving do.

My old boys Out Of Office read

 

"I have retired, well done me.

 

I hope you are able to find someone competent to assist you with your enquiry..

 

failing that, please contact

 

*a director* (he wrote actual mame)

 

on [email protected] and he will endeavour to hinder you in every way possible"

[stephen01]

My neighbours hate looking at my scrap cars so much they have had a wall built

[Pillock]

Time to start buying scrap trucks.

[stephen01]

I woundnt mind but they have covered the panda in cement, got shit all over my drive, been all over my drive, no one asked, or knocked or even clean up my side.

 

Tempted to go chuck all the shit back on his drive.

[saucedoctor]

MarvinsMom, on 03 Mar 2016 - 5:44 PM, said:

^^i think you should name this kwaliti* establishment so that the rest of us can avoid it like the plague!!

 

It's a no-name place with 3 or 4 guys in it. Old industrial estate at Kilroot Power Station, Carrickfergus NI. The bloke that runs it is apparently known as "Clanger". Apt.

[BavarianRetro]

To be fair, it could have been a low torque air ratchet as opposed to an impact driver.

 

To someone with the workshop experience and ability of the average parts delivery driver, both would qualify as a "windy gun".

[cort16]

Hope you had the courtesy to drop off a chew toy for the testers dog;)

 

Would be good to see the p6 at a scotoshite one evening!

 

Given the last time I tried to drive it more than 20 miles this happened probably not.

 

[320touring]

if you could cook an egg with it you'll be made most welcome

[EssDeeWon]

Some bloke on the 75 forum is selling his 2001 car, duff clutch and no MOT for £2750 !!!!

 

[Mr_Bo11ox]

McLOLNALDS

[richardmorris]

http://www.stewardwood.org/index.ghtml

[angle]

On reflection I've decided this thread is the correct one because he irritates the piss out of me, but the man I sit next to at work came in all happy because he'd bought a car yesterday (he was 'working from home') and was picking it up tonight. An 04-plate Meriva for £1100. I asked him if he liked it:

 

'Yeah, it's done a few miles but its in pretty good condition. The steering suddenly got really stiff when I went on a test drive but the guy said it just needed a new battery and he's fitting one today.'

 

Seriously man, you have an engineering degree.

 

I told him to type 'Meriva power steering' into Google and went on site for the afternoon...

[rantingYoof]

A chap at work left today.

 

As is the norm a presentation was had in the centre of the office. Nice chap, and after the usual speech from the team leader he said a few words.

 

My mind was just beginning to wander when I heard the words "I've bought the BEAST!" and I tuned back in to see him pointing vaguely out the window towards the car park.

 

I hung around after everyone had dispersed and spoke to him.

I'll sum up his accidental but brilliant venture into Autoshite briefly...

 

 - Had a Renault Megane. It bombed an MOT. He fragged it spontaneously.

 

 - Realised he had no car and was rather a long way from home, relatively speaking.

 

 - Fired up Gumtree on his phone.

 

 - Found a near immaculate 1995 Citroen Ax 1.0 with 45,000 miles, with MOTs/history from previously elderly lady owner, for £250 around the corner from where he was.

 

 - Trotted over, bought it pretty much on sight alone, drove it home.

 

WINNING.

[danthecapriman]

I think I'd rather pay £1100 for someone to repeatedly kick me in the bollocks than for a Meriva!

[saucedoctor]

danthecapriman, on 03 Mar 2016 - 11:11 PM, said:

I think I'd rather pay £1100 for someone to repeatedly kick me in the bollocks than for a Meriva!

 

It's seems that you're representative of the public. I bought one at the block and couldn't get shot of it. 1600 8 valve, the road tax was putting buyers off. That, and the fact it was a Vauxhall.