What makes you grin? Antidote to grumpy thread

[spike60]

My 34 year old Porsche 924 bought blind on Ebay 2 months ago passed it's mot with no advisories this morning.  . The turd has had a little polishing though and I don't think it will be here long enough to get a comfy seat.....

[andy18s]

All is good in the T5 as the dashboard electrical gremlins have been identified as the ignition switch not quite returning to the correct spot once started

Even the eml has turned itself off

Off to look at a house which happens to have a 30x20 workshop attached. ...

[plasticvandan]

After all the arsing about with people retracting their bids on my bike,someones just clicked the buy it now button at the full asking price (made higher to entice offers nearer what i want) happy days! i predict much shite purchasing

[cobblers]

Lets hope they aren't just clicking it to get it off the market so they can come and have a look at their leisure, or not. My mate who sells campers on ebay stopped putting BINS on for exactly that reason. Also people selling similar stuff would click buy it now then wait a few days before claiming item not as described.

[plasticvandan]

cancel that,had a message " i clicked the button thinking that it would tell me the buy it now price,not buy it,i dont want ithe bike...... i am closing my ebay account in the next hour.

[vulgalour]

eBay is adequate for buying but absolutely appalling for selling on.

[purplebargeken]

The twat could have just looked at the screen, sent you a message or just took himself out (preferred option). Fuckwits

[Tayne]

I was given a beige Isuzzu Piazza for my birthday this morning.

I then took it racing and beat a Punto Abarth, Fiat 130 coupe and an MX5.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

This all happened in the virtual reality that is Gran Turismo.

[rml2345]

Off to look at a 30x20 workshop which happens to have a house attached. ...

EFA

[purplebargeken]

I went to look at a house once that had half the garden taken over by a workshop, inspection pit. Can't tell you owt about the house though. Mrs. PBK was unimpressed.

[Pillock]

Hang on, if you click BIN it doesn't just go through no questions asked, you get a fugging message telling you to only proceed if you're absolutely sure.

 

World-class bellend. Any way to make idle threats through ebay to claim the money? Not that he'll ever pay but it'll piss him off when he's getting 20 mails per day asking him to pay up.

[wuvvum]

All is good in the T5 as the dashboard electrical gremlins have been identified as the ignition switch not quite returning to the correct spot once started

 

Two of my 850s did that.  Must be a thing with them.

[Mr_Bo11ox]

You might as well 'request contact information' through ebay, if it gives a credible-sounding name and address, sign him up on a load of PPI claim websites.

[Cavcraft]

The only other way to do it (but it costs more, obviously) is to have the 'buy it now' price set up so anybody who clicks it has to pay immediately by Paypal. That sorts out 99% of the timewasters, though it seems to be extra fiddly to set up, as when I did it on the 106 I was selling, people couldn't pay because of my ebay setting, or something like that.

 

So, reading through that I'm recommending a service that I don't recommend.

[beko1987]

Finally have a day to myself to try out my new pressure washer and clean Amy's car!

 

 

 

 

Its now rinsed, foamed, wheels are clean, rinsed, washed, clayed, washed and dried.

 

Currently eating a pasty then I will polish, glaze, wax, polish the windows seal the windows, dress the tyres and dress the trim, and rainx the windscreen later when the sun does one.

 

I love days like these!!

[purplebargeken]

^^ Please move to where I live. 

[chaseracer]

You have made it sound so attractively pleasant previously, Ken...

 

[purplebargeken]

Ahh, bugger. Busted! 

 

Yeah, you are correct. It is a hellhole, don't come near the place.

[inconsistant]

I was given a beige Isuzzu Piazza for my birthday this morning.

I then took it racing and beat a Punto Abarth, Fiat 130 coupe and an MX5.

This all happened in the virtual reality that is Gran Turismo.

Oh good, thought it was just me.

Last week I beat someone's GTR nissan around that new 27km Sierra circuit in my pimped Ovlov 240 estate. Which was nice.

 

I'm not on that much, and I'd hate it to sound like I'm desperate for friends but if anyone fancies meeting up for a hoon I'm rt4th.

[beko1987]

All done now!

 

2 coats of Natty's blue all over, and an extra 50/50 on the bonnet of dodo hard candy and diamond white as my mate wanted to try some.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Sigmund Fraud]

Natty's blue all over, and an extra 50/50 on the bonnet of dodo hard candy and diamond white as my mate wanted to try some.

 

You are Carcoat Damphands AICMPF.

[vulgalour]

Well I thought I'd done good on the Xantia after spending 2 hours cleaning it today, but now I see someone has done a better job on a worse car.  *goes and sulks in the corner*

[Cavcraft]

Cavcraft stamp of approval for Vauxhall polishing.

[Cavcraft]

I see someone has done a better job on a worse car.  *goes and sulks in the corner*

 

You spelt the second better incorrectly.

[beko1987]

He he cheers. Close up the paintworks ruined, but it looks good from afar. Glad its done now, should see it through until the winter, then it'll get another coat of wax, and just foamed and rinsed if the salt gets too bad.

 

Can't wait to buy a new wing for the zx and give it the same treatment...

[fordperv]

mrs fordperv came outside all excited to tell me she had just seen a mk1 sierra 3 door on the new natwest advert, then she found the advert on youtube, i think that they have used its genuine plate as its showing up taxed and m.o.td and the details seem to be correct for a sierra, its on 16 seconds in

 

[Pillock]

So, Friday night and Saturday were voluntary work for me, but that was on a Scout activity day so chuff all interest on here. Sunday, for a change, we thought we'd get up early and do some unpaid work - or rather, see if we fancied doing unpaid work in the future.

 

At the Donington Truck Racing back in July, they were advertising a taster day to become a marshal. Completely forgot about it until three weeks ago, signed up and still places. Mrs_Pillock then thought it sounded cool so signed up last week, still places left.

 

7.30am saw us bleary-eyed at Donington Park, being given a high-vis and promised lots of walking and even more sarcasm. First job, back in the car and round to the marshal briefing area - this involves going on the track, so naturally it was done very slowly* and the racing line was not* taken.

Bit of a delay so they organised a few hot laps - Mazda supply a course car so a few folk went in the Mazda 6, and we jumped in the Mitsubishi Warrior Animal Grrr Arrgh fire truck. Nicely, the driver decided that the tyres needed warming so did two laps, touching 90mph (not bad given the water and foam tanks on the back were full, and we were 5-up)

 

 

We then had a briefing, headed back to the outfield in our cars (so more "sticking to the 30mph limit" just like all the experienced marshals were, more like caning the diesel power and clipping apexes) and found our base in one of the hospitality suites. From there, the morning was seeing all the different jobs they do (wasn't sure about taking too many photos, especially in non-public areas) so got to go in scrutineering (where they had a very banana-shaped XR2i from yesterday's big smash, with a lightly dented AX GT and Nova GTE), look over a 106GTI and a Formula-V cars to check out safety features and what not to touch, and then race control and a chat with the course directors. Oh, and saw the Renault Formula-E cars (fully electric Renault racing cars, WCPGW?). Had a race across gravel traps carrying a fire extinguisher, and learned how to wave flags and exactly how many people you piss off by accidentally waving the red one.

 

Wandered up the pits, this weekend was 750 Motor Club which includes a Honda Civic class, Stock Hatch (XR2, GTE, GTI and whatnot), 1300 Locost, BMW Compact (identical 1.9 318ti models), MR2 Championship and Formula V which is Beetle front ends, wrong-way-around 1300 aircooled engine and boxes, on a single-seater chassis with fancy rear suspension.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Lunched up, then we were put on a post for the afternoon. I was with a Yorkshire lad who spends 3 out of 4 weekends marshalling - rally, circuit, even did Goodwood Festival. Had a great view!

 

 

Got to help a chap whose Mk2 MR2 spaffed coolant everywhere - looked like a popped hose, but he reckoned head gasket (we'd spotted him throwing coolant out the back the lap before, the next time we spotted him he was parking up in front of post) so pushed it back to track after the race, and hooked it up to the truck. Also a Civic with a busted driveshaft, and a bit of gravel-kicking after another MR2 exited stage backwards.

 

Definitely going to take this further. It'll cost me £20 to register with the club, need to buy overalls but I get £40 back on those. Then I can go to most races as a trainee until I've done 15 races and been observed and signed, at which point I can do a training day and start working towards specialising in something like flag-waving or observing. The only restriction seems to be that F1 Marshals need to be invited, and trainees don't get invited. Everything else, up to and including touring car and WRC, is fair game.

 

You get in events free, plus you get a spare ticket too for other half to spectate whilst you're "working". Sometimes they even pay you food expenses although only 5 quid a day or so. The guy I was with had been to Goodwood for free, been paid 4x£5 for his trouble, and got closer to the action than the paying crowd. Just standing the other side of the fence feels pretty special.

[mat_the_cat]

diamond white as my mate wanted to try some.

 

 

Brings back memories (and I use the term in the loosest possible sense) of Saturday nights getting pissed on the cheapest alcohol available, before trying our fake ID in the local club...

[Stanky]

Pillock,

 

If you ever come down to Thruxton to marshal give me a PM. I've been doing it for years now and its ace. Some days are better than others, but a good day makes you feel like a hero.

 

Glad you enjoyed the day, good to see people try it and enjoy it - a lot hate it! 750MC are a great bunch too. A lot of marshals drive prime chod, most amusingly when at the full "30mph"

[Bobthebeard]

Had to have a tree surgeon round to remove a couple of branches from a large eucalyptus tree that were posing a threat to the shed. The guys did the job fine. Grin is, when I mentioned that we had a wood burning stove, they asked if I would like the wagon load of ash tree sections that they had just cut down locally. Result!

All In two foot sections of around a foot diameter. Must be around half a ton of it. Will need to saw/chop it all up, but even so. Free heat all winter!