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Automotive bull5hit facts thread

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The original Austin Princess styling buck was crafted out of cheese

 

The Ford KA Endura engine is exactly the same as the one used in the 1959 Ford Anglia. Same ECU and everything

 

The Italian Job producers fell out with BMC over the costs of Mini Coopers so at one point spoke to Rootes about using Hillman Imps instead. This is true because my uncle knew Carlo Ponti who told him this on the set of "Smashing Time" back in the sixties. What Ponti had to do with the Italian Job is less clear considering Smashing Time was made years earlier. But my uncle said so, so it's PHAKT.

 

The mark one Granada design spec included banger racing capabilities.

 

Rover had a five speed box prepared for the Mini back in 1981 but Honda vetoed it as they were worried about it stealing Civic sales.

 

Alfa Romeos factory in Naples was next door to a fish canning plant. An unfortunate plumbing error saw the Alfasud body shells sprayed with brine prior to paint application rather than the Zinc primer they were supposed to get. However the Cagliori Tuna Company were able to offer a ten year anti rust warranty on all fish products

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In 2012 Audi discovered that vapour from some of the adhesive used in the interior of certain A3 and A4 models could react with testosterone causing a chemical imbalance in some classes of drivers. As the demographic affected could only be found in certain markets and it was thought that the characteristics of low IQ, tiny genitalia, over developed upper body muscle and massive self confidence,would mean the individuals being unable to afford Audis. Unfortunately VAG failed to take into account the company car market in the UK,whereby hair gelled retards regularly get issued with these vehicles.

Audi decided, after a mass debate ,not to recall these cars,as it was cheaper to settle law suits , especially as it would be very difficult to prove the level of mental degradation of the typical sufferer.

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BMW's propeller logo is not a homage to their aerospace engine past. It a modified version of a Trivial Pursuit pie, the favoured game of the Quandt family.

 

Guigaro didn't just design cars - he was also responsible for the Campari logo, the Brut 33 bottle and the Sodastream

 

Stirling Moss is extremely selective about what he endorses. If it doesn't fall under the category of "anything at all" he isn't interested

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Wolsey, the makers of mens' underwear, decided in the 1930s to expand in to the rapidly developing car manufacturing industry.  This decision was influenced by the fact that men tended to keep their pants for upwards of 20 years, usually disposing of them only when the elastic had become exposed by all the washing (i.e. after about 40 washes).  Turnover in the mens underwear market was thus steady, but unrewarding in the cash sense. 

The new Wolsey car was designed and a large advertising campaign in the daily papers was conducted.  Unfortunately, due to the fact that dyslexia was not discovered until the 1980s, and the quirk of fate that the proof reader and the printer were both as yet unrecognised dyslexics, the adverts proclaimed the new Wolseley car to the receptive market.  So much copy had been printed and distributed by the time the error was noticed, that the spelling had to stay.

 

It is ironic that the poor spellers that frequent ebay have, perhaps accidentally, reverted to Wolsey's origional spelling.

 

 

'origional' was deliberate.  Other errors may have been, when you point them out to me.

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The Schmidts, Mullers, and Reinhardts from the Audi 100 advert absolutely fucking despised each other

 

Guigaro's original Fiat UNO design was picked up by Nissan and used for the Skyline

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The Rover K series uses the otto cycle,and as I'm sure you know the technology was stolen from the Ottoman Empire by a French speaking Belgian by the name of Vanden Plas. In his escape by boat he was heard to be shouting 'Vitesse,Vitesse!' Upon entering the English Channel he was ambushed by Admiral Sterling sailing a Viking long boat. This then lead to the legendary trademark Rover badge and model names we know and love today.

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The annoying couple who pretended to be married in the series of Renault 25 adverts really hated each other but only kept up the appearance for the sake of the free Renault 5s that they used to get as a fee.

 

and Nicole wasn't really his daughter in the Clio advert, she was actually a teenage mistress who had daddy issues.

 

Geoffrey Palmer, who did the voice-overs for Audi adverts, was given an Audi 200 as a thank-you by the company; it was originally meant to be an Audi 100 but that had an unfortunate accident being unloaded at the dock and the 200 was a hasty replacement

 

 

Bugger, I think that last one might be true.

Edited by anonymous user

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Arthur Haynes once had a bet with his drinking partner George Lucas that he could write a work of fiction in such a way that people would believe it was fact.

 

Lucas, spurred on by this decided that there should be clues to aid the reader realise that the book was fiction and coined the phrase "refitting is the reverse of the procedure". Arthur was rather surprised to discover his first book "The Arthurs Guide to the Morris 8" hailed as a valuable mechanics aid despite drawings done on the back of a fag packet bearing little or no resemblance to any production parts. Lucas admitted defeat and paid Arthur the 6d and half a mild he had wagered. Arthur, on the other hand went on to write book after book, employing literally people to invent facts about each and every car under the British Empires Sky.

 

Lucas wasnt one to shy away from the commercial success of knowing fuck all about cars and introduced his failsafe system of smoke inside plastic tubes to power lights, horn and other automotive items. His patented smoke which would turn to a silvery black solid if exposed to air is still used in French cars to this day.

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The Ford Capri was named after the popular childrens fruit based squash,Caprisun.

 

 

The little known and rare "Ford Escort" was named after an 88 year old prostitue of a different name. John.

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The Kia Shuma was voted number three on a list of "Cars St Paul would have driven"

 

The fastest ever speed recorded through the Mersey tunnels was 124 mph in an MG Montego. This happened in 1991 when Screaming Lord Sutch was running late for an election count for the Liverpool Walton seat.

 

Peter Capaldi and David Tennant both list their virginity in the back seat of the same Vauxhall Ventora (not at the same time obviously)

 

Newsreader Anna Ford had a fist fight with Moira Stewart when Stewart suggested changing their company cars from Fords to Vauxhalls.

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