Certified Nonce modifications

[DSdriver]

15 minutes ago, Split_Pin said:

I believe those smoked plates are to evade number plate recognition devices. 

And why would an honest law abiding citizen wish to do that? Lock 'em up!

[Dobloseven]

Would have initially said people with lowered suspension.But they usually put speed bumps near schools,so as you were.

[JJ0063]

How about the latest plates, 4D ‘bubble’ (yes they’re actually legal) 🤢 

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZGenmkbaX/

[JJ0063]

On the chameleon tint topic, agree, seeing something with a bright acid green or rose gold screen looks fucking horrendous.

 

The only style I’ll be honest I actually *quite like is the really subtle one that is the same shade as the OEM climate screens you get on some cars, only visible in certain lights and looks nothing like a typical ‘chameleon’ tint

[Erebus]

This stupid rust paint:

[Popsicle]

53 minutes ago, Erebus said:

This stupid rust paint:

It always amazes me how the plastic bits go so rusty.....

[RoverFolkUs]

Absolutely anything to a MK-fucking-4 Astra... 

[RoverFolkUs]

Absolutely anyone that would get a standard booted focus and do this to it to it in order to be the only ST saloon to exist

They'll call it a "cossie" and it'll be the "focal" point (pun not intended) of conversation in every pub within a 10 mile radius. 

It'll have an electric fence around it. Not to keep any sticky fingers away from it, but to keep all kids safely away from the owner. 

[EspenO]

I love these threads.

Three pages in, and nobody’s yet realised how their really oddly specific pet peeves and pettiness is far weirder than any pop and bang map 😂

[Cavcraft]

Those headlight peaks are 100% designed so the bulbs illuminate bicycles with small wheels and the number plates are a just cheap golden retriever looking out of the window.

[Metal Guru]

The letters P R I U S on the back.

[Dave_Q]

7 hours ago, JJ0063 said:

How about the latest plates, 4D ‘bubble’ (yes they’re actually legal) 🤢 

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZGenmkbaX/

Just when you thought the nonciest plates had already been documented in the thread, the sick bastards go and invent something worse

[Sham]

11 hours ago, Cavcraft said:

Whatever those fucking Power Rangers do to their motorbikes that makes them rev to 2,000,000,000,000 RPM and sound like they're turning the fuel on/off at the same time. 

Surely that's just a fake Chinese rip-off Akrapovic pipe with the baffles removed and bouncing the poor unmodified engine off the rev limiter like the attention seeking twats they are? The baby sport bikes will rev to about 14-16k and even basic bikes will beat 10k and sound like a lot more through those shitty pipes.

Why some bikers reaction to every-fucking-thing is to pin the throttle and hold the clutch is utterly beyond me. Attention seeking wankers.

You really need a good hard look in the mirror when you go cruising past the high school in/on a BMW 116/Aldi A1/Ford ST line/Yamaha R125 at letting out time trying to attract attention.

[sierraman]

6 hours ago, RoverFolkUs said:

Absolutely anything to a MK-fucking-4 Astra... 

I passed one yesterday on the motorway, an 04 one it had loads of cheap shit from eBay stuck to it, crappy aftermarket alloys etc. It looked exactly like what you’d imagine a 43 year old bus driver from Wakefield driving when he gets caught out by one of those exposure teams on YouTube 😂

[Dave_Q]

5 hours ago, Metal Guru said:

The letters P R I U S on the back.

This is not a modification, and www.thedarkwob.com is the place for your edgy boi racist takes.

[twosmoke300]

It’s only one of the most technologically advanced cars of the last 30 yrs 😂

[timolloyd]

On the Sniff ‘n Smith podcast they came up with an excellent idea. To create an urban myth/rumour that gel plates were issues by the police to people on the sex offenders register, so the police could quickly recognise registered vehicles.

[bunglebus]

Jackpot, even in McDonald's car park for added sad points

[Split_Pin]

7 hours ago, EspenO said:

I love these threads.

Three pages in, and nobody’s yet realised how their really oddly specific pet peeves and pettiness is far weirder than any pop and bang map 😂

What's more odd is that someone on Autoshite is calling everyone weird and thinking their remark sounds mildly derogatory. 

We ARE weird, and proud. 

[MorrisItalSLX]

Truck nuts.

[SiC]

9 minutes ago, bunglebus said:

Jackpot, even in McDonald's car park for added sad points

To save those looking up the plates, they're a 177bhp diesel and a 122bhp petrol. 

Certain cars seem to attract certain mods like those. The E9x (BMW 3-series) is the worst especially the E93 coupe. Probably because it's an old BMW, like the E46 and E36 before had the same thing. Usually the 318d/320d is the engine of choice on the E9x and debaged of course. When they pull in the right lane next to me in the 330i, they must clock the 3.0 badge as they invariably don't bother with a traffic light GP...

[sierraman]

I don’t know if anyone else picked up on this but years ago whenever they used to have a TV detective show on, if there was some sort of serial rapist or nonce they’d always have a Volvo 240. 

[artdjones]

5 hours ago, Metal Guru said:

The letters P R I U S on the back.

And a taxi plate on the bumper.

[Weird Car]

One of those weird valve things that makes your mk3 Mondao diesel go Pa-shoooo when you push the clutch in

 

also way too many eBay generic stickers on the back like ‘built not bought’ and that stick figure trying to pull the fuel gauge off of empty 

[bunglebus]

I have to say I'm guilty of plenty of the things on this thread, all part of being young and expressing yourself for the most part. I've had loud exhausts, lowered lots of cars and run stretched tyres, plus motorbike size digits on car 'plates. 

The most accurate comments on here are probably the Prius taxi ones if you really want to play spot the sexual predator 

[Lankytim]

A guy at work has this….. BJs 4 KDS. 

[Dave_Q]

As I think most people have worked out, the thread is intended as a tongue in cheek ribbing of modifications so tasteless they make you think the driver touches kids.

It is not intended as an actual guide to spotting nonces by their cars and if you have a red hot take about taxi drivers or grooming gangs, I would cordially invite you to FUCK RIGHT OFF with that shit to www.thedarkwob.com where literally dozens of 2-bob Farage and Clarkson tribute acts are primed and ready to appreciate your ability to recount horrendous and famous criminal cases in a Pavlovian manner because the thread contains the word nonce.

Cheers xx

[bangernomics]

Porthole windows.




Gzongenflatch
In memory of Phil.

[bangernomics]

In fact any customised van.




Gzongenflatch
In memory of Phil.

[artdjones]

17 minutes ago, Dave_Q said:

As I think most people have worked out, the thread is intended as a tongue in cheek ribbing of modifications so tasteless they make you think the driver touches kids.

It is not intended as an actual guide to spotting nonces by their cars and if you have a red hot take about taxi drivers or grooming gangs, I would cordially invite you to FUCK RIGHT OFF with that shit to www.thedarkwob.com where literally dozens of 2-bob Farage and Clarkson tribute acts are primed and ready to appreciate your ability to recount horrendous and famous criminal cases in a Pavlovian manner because the thread contains the word nonce.

Cheers xx

Sorry, didn't realise you're the boss of the forum.