Most stupid message while flogging a shiter

[RoverFolkUs]

  On 05/09/2022 at 09:42, Low Horatio gearbox said:

Im selling the GFs previous car (finally)

At ten to midnight last night I get a few messages  🤪    I'll wait till 11.50 tonight to reply yes it is available but as per the listing.. no swaps.

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Clearly nobody is able to form a sentence and speak properly these days. 

Imagine asking someone face to face "swap 2011 Astra" 🤦‍♂️

It surely can't be that difficult to say "would you consider a swap for a 2011 Astra" 

Then that would make him look even less of a numpty if it says no swaps on the advert anyway 🤦‍♂️😆

[stuboy]

  On 05/09/2022 at 09:42, Low Horatio gearbox said:

I'll wait till 11.50 tonight to reply yes it is available but as per the listing.. no swaps.

 

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215am better when u get up for a slash

[sutty2006]

And so it begins…… let’s see how irate this dozy sod gets….. 

 

[Poweredbyhopealone]

  On 06/09/2022 at 16:10, sutty2006 said:

And so it begins…… let’s see how irate this dozy sod gets….. 

 

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You're selling an e39 M5 for £600?????

What is it cursed? Haunted by a really racist ghost?

[sutty2006]

  On 06/09/2022 at 17:46, Poweredbyhopealone said:

You're selling an e39 M5 for £600?????

What is it cursed? Haunted by a really racist ghost?

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When you list a car on market place it asks for “make” and the drop down box gives you the makes. Fine. Then it asks for “model”……… not fine. All the “M” “X” and “i” models. Nothing else. Nothing remotely close to 523i. which is stupid. So the closest one was m5. 🤣

[sutty2006]

 

 

or in my language…… “off you fuck”

[808 Estate]

  On 04/09/2022 at 22:40, RoverFolkUs said:

Not a car, not mine, and I call bollocks, but amusing none the less

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I would have asked her to send photos to help the decision making.

[sierraman]

  On 06/09/2022 at 18:14, sutty2006 said:

 

 

or in my language…… “off you fuck”

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I’ve often thought, why waste time with small talk. Next time I go in Morrisons I’ll just load all the weeks shopping on the conveyor and just go ‘£15’. No more, no less. 

That said it’s better than some fucking 4 paragraph long diatribe about me being a wounded ex servicemen persistently plagued by bad luck and how based on that you pretty much ought to give it me. 

[GR8 PL8 M8]

  On 06/09/2022 at 18:13, sutty2006 said:

When you list a car on market place it asks for “make” and the drop down box gives you the makes. Fine. Then it asks for “model”……… not fine. All the “M” “X” and “i” models. Nothing else. Nothing remotely close to 523i. which is stupid. So the closest one was m5. 🤣

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You can enter a custom model, but from my experience that then enters the listing into approval purgatory and no-one will ever see it.

Selling my Toyota Soarer I really wanted to list it as the UZZ32 that it is, but then found that "Soarer" wasn't even an option. Not wanting to list it as a Supra I went for the custom route - over a week and one unanswered customer service message later it still hadn't been approved.

On the plus side I ended up sticking the car on eBay and it sold within a week to the first person that messaged me about it, so I skipped the bullshit that has filled the last 49 pages.

[sutty2006]

Ehhhh? 
 

What’s the catch? 
 

if that name was entirely readable I’d be accepting his offer, which is more than likely a scam. 

[sierraman]

It’d be £550 over the phone the £250 when he says it’s got something up with it when/if he turns up. I just would not entertain any offers over the phone, it’s a sure sign of a time waster. If he’s serious he’ll ask for a time to view. 

[sutty2006]

  On 07/09/2022 at 11:51, sierraman said:

It’d be £550 over the phone the £250 when he says it’s got something up with it when/if he turns up. I just would not entertain any offers over the phone, it’s a sure sign of a time waster. If he’s serious he’ll ask for a time to view. 

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My thoughts exactly. It’ll never happen. And if it did, it’d be like taking it to We buy Any Car, knocks 50 quid off for every scratch! 

[sierraman]

I’d like this BMW to an old Sheepdog, she’s given good loyal service for years but now it’s 13 years and the back legs are going. In that situation would you sell it to a tramp down the pub for £5 or would you give it a bullet behind the ear quietly after buying it a Chinese. If It could talk the dog would probably thank you for sparing it going home to some ghastly bedsit with a drunk who stinks of Drum rolling tobacco. I would imagine the BMW, were it not an inanimate object, would feel the same, with that in mind I’d take it out one last blast then kill it off with a burnout.

[RoverFolkUs]

[Matty]

  On 05/08/2022 at 20:34, Matty said:

No supporting evidence cos I'm shit with phones. I'm currently on email contact with a lad in Glasgow whose interested in buying one of mine. He comes down to Lancashire sporadically and is down next week. This is when I'm away on holiday.

"Can I come weds?"

"No I'm away"

"Is there anyone who can show me the car?"

"No bud. Big family holiday, they're all with me"

"Can I have your address? I can just go round your house and look at the outside of it."

Now I know that 99% of folk are basically not criminals but giving my address to a total stranger so he can come round while I'm away? Aye, alright.

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Take heart. A nice fella rang on Friday, drove all the way from Reading after work Saturday, asked a few sensible questions, paid the full asking price by bank transfer and drove it away. 

They do still exist 👍

[Rust Collector]

  On 07/09/2022 at 14:15, RoverFolkUs said:

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I seem to remember reading an article at one point where it had been found that real fur was being sold as faux fur in some items - presumably as it was cheaper!!

[Pieman]

Jesus, if someone kept trying like that with me I'd respond "Why don't I just give you my address and you come round and steal them, that's what you really want isn't it you fucking chav idiot".

[GrumpiusMaximus]

I think Sandra Fisher is a few mackerel short of a shoal...

[Split_Pin]

"SANDRA IF YOU REALLY THINK YOU WANT TO DO ME A FAVOUR, TAKE YOUR £50 DOWN TO THE BEACH, INTO THE SEA AND KEEP WALKING YOU SIMPERING TRUMPET"

[mitsisigma01]

She's only got £20 , but if you give her petrol money she would probably go. Scaggy old slapper

[sierraman]

If you put Sandra Fishers head on a bonfire, some say it would burn for a month. 

[High Jetter]

  On 07/09/2022 at 16:06, Matty said:

A nice fella rang on Friday, drove all the way from Reading

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Maybe there's hope from that shithole?

[Matty]

  On 07/09/2022 at 21:37, High Jetter said:

Maybe there's hope from that shithole?

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Saying nowt. I live in Haslingden 😁

[inconsistant]

I’ve advertised my son’s mountain bike on facebook for £75…

 

Ooh I’ve got an offer!

 

 

[stuboy]

  On 08/09/2022 at 10:09, inconsistant said:

I’ve advertised my son’s mountain bike on facebook for £75…

 

Ooh I’ve got an offer!

 

 

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decline and off u fcuk

[Alan_Green]

[DavidB]

For all the 'make us an offer' facebook group posts

[sutty2006]

???? 

[sierraman]

The unbridled joy of selling an old BMW...

[sutty2006]

  On 09/09/2022 at 07:55, sierraman said:

The unbridled joy of selling an old BMW...

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I’m not sure it’s a BMW anymore after that brief conversation.