The grumpy thread

[chaseracer]

...I’m feeling rough as a badgers ass and the forecast is wetter than a dolphins handshake

 

SIMILE = SMILE 

[twosmoke300]

Wetter than an otters pocket

[Inspector Morose]

It’s the wife’s first Saturday at work today so, obviously I’ve been up to wake the birds to give her a lift in. Apparently I don’t understand how hard it is to go to work on weekends.

 

Yeah, you mean like the past 30 years of my working life, you mean.

[New POD]

It’s the wife’s first Saturday at work today so, obviously I’ve been up to wake the birds to give her a lift in. Apparently I don’t understand how hard it is to go to work on weekends.

 

Yeah, you mean like the past 30 years of my working life, you mean.

And you didn't understand how hard it was for her when you used to put working ok n a Saturday before spending time with her at the weekend.

 

Women, you'll never win.

 

In the last 24 hours I had 2 conversations with my wife which makes me chuckle.

 

The first. We need to buy some lined paper. It needs margins and some coloured ball point pens. Not gel pens. She won't go to Tesco.

I say go to Waitrose. She insists they won't have them. We'll have to go to Asda. Only 12 mile round trip rather than 1 mile.

I say "well if you are certain, that's what we will have to do"

She says "I know you don't believe me, but you should trust me. I don't lie"

I say "I didn't say you wee lying, I just think it's a long way to go if you are mistaken"

She says" Well go and prove me wrong"

 

15 mins later I come back with said stationary. She inspects it.

She says " You left me all alone just to prove a point. "

No I left you alone cause you told me to prove you wrong

 

Later we had a conversation about why we can't go to a wedding of a distant relative I've met twice in the last 30 years. Neither of us want to go, but it clashes with other stuff.

She says "There was another reason"

If you say so. I've no idea

Think. You are not even trying to think

We haven't had a discussion about another reason.

We have. You are too.lazy to think

.....I go to the loo.

I come back

.....We are looking after Lynn's dog that weekend....

Yeah, you never told me that.

It's on the calendar. It wasn't you I spoke to.... it was Lynn...But You should know. It's on the calendar.......

Yeah I should look at June just in case there's something I might need to worry about in March?

 

I did get a sort of apology on both.

[twosmoke300]

Careful ! You will get told off for that !

[Inspector Morose]

Women, you'll never win.

It’s not about winning or loosing, I just wouldn’t mind one of those “well, at least you tried” medals they give to fat kids who come last on sports day.

[New POD]

It’s not about winning or loosing, I just wouldn’t mind one of those “well, at least you tried” medals they give to fat kids who come last on sports day.

You should listen to Frank Turners song THE Eulogy

 

The words

 

But on the day I die, I can say, at least I fucking Tried.

[chaseracer]

...those “well, at least you tried” medals they give to fat kids who come last on sports day.

 

I think I've still got all of mine somewhere.

[Cavcraft]

medals they give to fat kids who come last 

 

If only.

[Inspector Morose]

I think I've still got all of mine somewhere.

Alas I came from the era of “you came last. You’re no fucking good - deal with it” school of appreciation.

[ruffgeezer]

That's a bit much to fit on a medal, no?

[Inspector Morose]

We were fat, there was plenty of room.

[sierraman]

Forget White Audi man, there’s a new scourge to the roads. It’s ‘sub prime finance Insignia Chav’

 

I’ve encountered several instances lately of these being the chariot of choice for the Chav being driven like it’s on the Nurburgring or festooned with shit mods like those stickers saying ‘...because Insignia’ or the alloys being painted black with some aerosols from Poundland.

[SiC]

Forget White Audi man, there’s a new scourge to the roads. It’s ‘sub prime finance Insignia Chav’

 

I’ve encountered several instances lately of these being the chariot of choice for the Chav being driven like it’s on the Nurburgring or festooned with shit mods like those stickers saying ‘...because Insignia’ or the alloys being painted black with some aerosols from Poundland.

Don't worry, it won't be long before they're off the road ... due to a failed oil pump taking the engine out.

[mercrocker]

Equally they will have knocked some bird up in a couple of years and be trapped in a financed Juke....

[Cavcraft]

Equally they will have knocked some bird up in a couple of years 

 

{adds Insignias to eBay search}

[wuvvum]

Those 2-litre CDTi engines do seem to be a touch on the fragile side.

[Cavcraft]

The gearboxes aren't too clever in the petrol ones, either.

 

If you catch the CDTi ones in time (i.e pretty much as soon as the oil light comes on) you can save them by replacing the seal in the oil pump, and later (I think someone said 2016 on) ones had better ones fitted from the off.

[treehugger]

Driving back from Lancaster yesterday, skirting Bradford, hellish in rush hour. Somebody pulls out from road on left, through gap in standing traffic inside lane, and through the middle lane, I was coming down, not even looking. Had to slam on brakes, road atlas n CD on passenger seat fly onto floor, thankfully stopped in time. Matey in golf (?) with blacked out rear windows sails on oblivious. Narrowly avoided being rear ended myself.

Where do these idiots come from?

[bramz7]

So I called the DVLA about a car I sold last year as they kept charging me for the road tax. Got a cheque.

 

I've been charged twice for it since.

 

I've also had (one of) my accounts black listed by them so they won't accept monthly DD anymore.

 

Double standards.

[New POD]

Driving back from Lancaster yesterday, skirting Bradford,

Where do these idiots come from?

Keighley or Steeton ?

Or Bradford ?

Maybe Leedz?

[Pillock]

So I called the DVLA about a car I sold last year as they kept charging me for the road tax. Got a cheque.

 

I've been charged twice for it since.

 

I've also had (one of) my accounts black listed by them so they won't accept monthly DD anymore.

 

Double standards.

 

If they're still taking money out of a DD for a car you've notified them about, your refund comes straight from the bank under the DD guarantee. 

[Aston Martin]

Driving back from Lancaster yesterday, skirting Bradford,

Where do these idiots come from?

 

Hmmmm.... nope, never mind.

[scaryoldcortina]

Driving back from Lancaster yesterday, skirting Bradford, hellish in rush hour. Somebody pulls out from road on left, through gap in standing traffic inside lane, and through the middle lane, I was coming down, not even looking. Had to slam on brakes, road atlas n CD on passenger seat fly onto floor, thankfully stopped in time. Matey in golf (?) with blacked out rear windows sails on oblivious. Narrowly avoided being rear ended myself.

Where do these idiots come from?

Side roads. You said it yourself earlier in the post.

[RayMK]

On the 26th Feb I had a minor grump because my mobility scooter had a FTP, thereby blocking my Reliant in the garage.  Had a quick look at it today with the rear cover off and fixed it within a few minutes.  The main connector had come loose.  Still can't easily get my Reliant out.  I'm an untidy bu**er. 

[dean36014]

Found out why the newly purchased C4 is so slow, the turbo is seized. It's just not worth lashing out on a new core and associated pipe work as there are so many other faults on it. Can't get a quote on cartakeback as it's already registered on there! Looks like I'm going to have to take the hit on this one and buy something else. Kinda of wished I'd kept the C2 now.

[beko1987]

Just drive it slowly?

[dean36014]

I will do, hopefully it will plod on to August when I'll scrap it as it wont go through an MOT. It's just horrible to drive as it's stuck in limp mode so won't rev up

[Lacquer Peel]

Is there any way to unstick the turbo? I assume it's the vanes that are stuck, bung a load of Mr. Muscle down there.

[captain_cal]

Peeled a large chunk of my big toenail back at the gym this morning. Only realised when the blood began to seep through my shoe and when I investigated half of the nail was standing bolt upright. Throb throb throb.