The grumpy thread

[captain_70s]

An ongoing gripe I have. I am applying for some jobs but keep hitting things like this:

 

Please complete the online assessment where you will be shown various scenarios and asked for your response.

Why are you interested in my response? I'm going to be some shop assistant, with a glorified title, on minimum wage. Why, in order to get this job, do I have to second guess your marketing department's selling manual? Won't I be trained to match your company goals, or do you only employ people who guess right to save on training?

 

Why do I apparently need an NVQ in anything to do anything? Not got an NVQ 1 in answering the telephone, oh dear. No NVQ in counting cash and giving change? No, but my mathematical dexterity might be hinted at in that I have an A level in the subject, plus I was working in shops in summer jobs before you were born, you know, when they didn't have tills that worked it out for you. (Better not put that in an online test, too many people might fail it.)

 

No, I'm not interested in outbound calling work. I have a moral repugnance towards bullshitters and liars. Further, if your business model relies on an office full of people working 14 hours a day, 7 days a week to sell your product then you must have some f****** big profit margins to cover the cost. Also, if, as you keep making out, it's such a great place to work, why do you keep having to advertise for staff every few weeks?

 

Rant over.

The problem is every job gets a billion applications so they can afford to throw out every one that isn't exactly what they want and then they just have to look through them manually. Then they end up employing somebody who's shit at the job because the only thing they're good at is bullshitting through the application process.

 

A FOOL PROOF SYSTEM.

[3VOM]

The problem is every job gets a billion applications so they can afford to throw out every one that isn't exactly what they want and then they just have to look through them manually. Then they end up employing somebody who's shit at the job because the only thing they're good at is bullshitting through the application process.

 

A FOOL PROOF SYSTEM.

I'm all for weeding out the people who can't speak English but are applying for call centre jobs (for instance) but it's the next step, the "assessing you as a person" bit that they try to do. My answer to a question may be right according to Tesco's policy but wrong for Asda's policies. So what do I do? Lie on one of them? More likely 33% of applicants got it right by random choice. If you want to select your staff based on random choice, fine but I don't think it is a good policy. More importantly, the process is backwards. It really is guess our policies and marketing strategies and we will tell you what they are after we employ you.

[jakebullet]

People thinking I'm retarded today.

 

A month back I had the misfortune of bumping into aunt bignose while I was with Kinky Girl. Today I'm at tesco with Ma, and screeching noises herald the arrival of bignose. She says to Ma "Is he still courting then?". A) I'm stood here, and not some invisible person and B ) Yes, there is one real woman in the world mad enough to want me. Not that it's any of your business.

 

I then want to buy some of those freezer block things for cool box. Ma tells me 'They don't stay cold forever you know!'. Really? I'd never heard of thermodynamics. I though cold stayed cold! I get 3 packs to be told 'Why do you want that many?', er they don't stay cold forever.....

[Stanky]

I was almost assassinated on the way to work today, driving through the notoriously outlaw South Downs this morning a group of banditos ambushed me, shooting wildly and I was lucky to escape with my life, behold the evidence

 

 

What actually happened is something fell off a lorry which was driving over a bridge as I drove under it at 70mph. There was a fucking massive bang, I nearly shat myself, and was left with a severely damaged windscreen (and underpants). whatever hit it managed to crush the glass in a section about 2" wide, then there are two concentric cracks around it where the glass has flexed due to the impact - total damaged area is about 6" across. Not sure what it was that fell off but its definitely new windscreen time.

 

There was no chance of finding the truck, the next sliproad wasn't for a good couple of miles and it would have been long gone by the time I'd doubled back.

 

Most irritating.

[mercrocker]

Fully justified shit-pants mode there, Stanky, that must have been some missile.   What a bastard....

[Stanky]

I'd been muttering about needing a new 'screen for a little while as there are a couple of small chips and if you're driving into low sun then it can be hard to see because of little scratches but this has somewhat sped up the purchase process.

 

After a call to the insurers, the underpants have been declared a cat-c write off and uneconomical to repair.

[trigger]

I've had that happen, as the lorries come out of the docks onto the A14 any shit on the roofs of the containers that they have just collected normally come flying off into the car behind, I've lost a screen due to a piece of chipboard and i've known peoples cars to be hit by heavy twistlocks before now.

 

Not fun at all.

[Sheefag]

After a call to the insurers, the underpants have been declared a cat-c write off and uneconomical to repair.

 

Will you be breaking them?

[Stanky]

Will swop 4 brkn x-box m8

[Station]

Had a good 1m squared sheet of ice fly off the top of a truck and land on my windscreen on the m6. Terrifying, it destroyed my wipers.

It went like this: 'Fuuuuuuuuuu SMASH uuuuucckkkk!!!'

[Jon]

I was driving home last night in front of me was three cars then a tractor, the road became long and straight, perfect to overtake. All three cars just sat there, not one tried to overtake, I couldn't overtake any of them as they were all driving too close to each other. It's time like this I wish I had my old Alfa as I could have blasted past all of them in one go.

 

As an antidote, I was driving home from a 600km round trip to collect some aged clay house bricks yesterday (these things can be in short supply when everyone builds houses out of wood, due to earthquakes) and a Honda CRV overtook me just as a Transit van pulled onto the road a few metres ahead and proceeded to not accelerate and then drive very slowly. CRV driver then planted on the brakes as he ducked back into what was now my braking area and then sat there despite nothing coming ahead, so I gave him a few seconds grace, then promptly overtook both of them whilst towing a trailer. CRV driver's reward for such poor drivership was then to sit behind me for a few kms later on when the hills came....

[captain_70s]

I don't post on the Dolomite forum anymore because my cars are too shit and they'll tell me I need new sills but I can't afford £250 worth of panels + weldage and paint, so they aren't getting new sills, they're getting patched to MOT standard. Yes, the rear doors scuff a bit if you open them with the car jacked up. I suspect the vast majority of Dolomites that haven't been restored or lived mollycoddled lives suffer from the same problem.

I mean I'd love to carry out a full body restoration on my £850 car that would be worth £1200 when it's finished and cost £5k but its just not going to happen. It's not going to snap in half and if you crash a Dolomite you're going to be well fucked regardless of sill strength when modern cars are the size and weight of a Leyland Olympian.

 

I dunno', I have to wonder whether somebody of my social class/financial state belongs in the "classic" world. My main goal is to simply keep the cars on the road as much as possible but is that really enough? I feel like I'm doing a disservice but is anybody else is going to want to restore the 1850HL? There isn't a single straight/rust free panel on it and it's a high mile example of a financially worthless model of car. The 1300 is prettier but thats just the result of long term giffer ownership, it's still crusty in (mostly non-structural) places and is in even worse shape engine-wise.

 

Forward progress is happening for the first time in over a year but sometimes think the money and effort I put in simply isn't enough. It's all a bit "scraping an MOT pass in 1991", but 25 years late.

[Barry Cade]

Traveling down to Dover on Monday,over to Dunkirk,down through the Fatherland,over the Alps for a few days at the Italian lakes. The Saab's been serviced, any suspect items been giving a stern looking at, sump dropped and cleaned, tailgate dent repaired and painted, spare Di unit purchased, washed,hoovered and polished.

 

It's rewarded all this Saablove by dumping it's coolant overnight via an unseen and unseeable bit of the radiator... the bastard. Panic call to Neo Bros today and the promise I'll have a rad and genuine coolant today by Fedex.

 

If the fedex person sticks a card through my letterbox instead of leaving the parts in the vicinity of my house I'm gonna bust.

[Ghosty]

I don't post on the Dolomite forum anymore because my cars are too shit and they'll tell me I need new sills but I can't afford £250 worth of panels + weldage and paint, so they aren't getting new sills, they're getting patched to MOT standard. Yes, the rear doors scuff a bit if you open them with the car jacked up. I suspect the vast majority of Dolomites that haven't been restored or lived mollycoddled lives suffer from the same problem.

I mean I'd love to carry out a full body restoration on my £850 car that would be worth £1200 when it's finished and cost £5k but its just not going to happen. It's not going to snap in half and if you crash a Dolomite you're going to be well fucked regardless of sill strength when modern cars are the size and weight of a Leyland Olympian.

 

I dunno', I have to wonder whether somebody of my social class/financial state belongs in the "classic" world. My main goal is to simply keep the cars on the road as much as possible but is that really enough? I feel like I'm doing a disservice but is anybody else is going to want to restore the 1850HL? There isn't a single straight/rust free panel on it and it's a high mile example of a financially worthless model of car. The 1300 is prettier but thats just the result of long term giffer ownership, it's still crusty in (mostly non-structural) places and is in even worse shape engine-wise.

 

Forward progress is happening for the first time in over a year but sometimes think the money and effort I put in simply isn't enough. It's all a bit "scraping an MOT pass in 1991", but 25 years late.

 

Just do what you can, if the car means as much to you as it seems to, you'll find a way to make things work out. One more Dolly on the roads is always good.

[Dippy]

I don't post on the Dolomite forum anymore because my cars are too shit and they'll tell me I need new sills but I can't afford £250 worth of panels + weldage and paint, so they aren't getting new sills, they're getting patched to MOT standard. Yes, the rear doors scuff a bit if you open them with the car jacked up. I suspect the vast majority of Dolomites that haven't been restored or lived mollycoddled lives suffer from the same problem.

I mean I'd love to carry out a full body restoration on my £850 car that would be worth £1200 when it's finished and cost £5k but its just not going to happen. It's not going to snap in half and if you crash a Dolomite you're going to be well fucked regardless of sill strength when modern cars are the size and weight of a Leyland Olympian.

 

I dunno', I have to wonder whether somebody of my social class/financial state belongs in the "classic" world. My main goal is to simply keep the cars on the road as much as possible but is that really enough? I feel like I'm doing a disservice but is anybody else is going to want to restore the 1850HL? There isn't a single straight/rust free panel on it and it's a high mile example of a financially worthless model of car. The 1300 is prettier but thats just the result of long term giffer ownership, it's still crusty in (mostly non-structural) places and is in even worse shape engine-wise.

 

Forward progress is happening for the first time in over a year but sometimes think the money and effort I put in simply isn't enough. It's all a bit "scraping an MOT pass in 1991", but 25 years late.

Keep the faith, I love to see proper 70s chod being used daily and not just polished and driven to shows.

[Tamworthbay]

I don't post on the Dolomite forum anymore because my cars are too shit and they'll tell me I need new sills but I can't afford £250 worth of panels + weldage and paint, so they aren't getting new sills, they're getting patched to MOT standard. Yes, the rear doors scuff a bit if you open them with the car jacked up. I suspect the vast majority of Dolomites that haven't been restored or lived mollycoddled lives suffer from the same problem.

I mean I'd love to carry out a full body restoration on my £850 car that would be worth £1200 when it's finished and cost £5k but its just not going to happen. It's not going to snap in half and if you crash a Dolomite you're going to be well fucked regardless of sill strength when modern cars are the size and weight of a Leyland Olympian.

 

I dunno', I have to wonder whether somebody of my social class/financial state belongs in the "classic" world. My main goal is to simply keep the cars on the road as much as possible but is that really enough? I feel like I'm doing a disservice but is anybody else is going to want to restore the 1850HL? There isn't a single straight/rust free panel on it and it's a high mile example of a financially worthless model of car. The 1300 is prettier but thats just the result of long term giffer ownership, it's still crusty in (mostly non-structural) places and is in even worse shape engine-wise.

 

Forward progress is happening for the first time in over a year but sometimes think the money and effort I put in simply isn't enough. It's all a bit "scraping an MOT pass in 1991", but 25 years late.

If you like it, stick with it, I can't be doing with the mirrors under the car types that inhabit many shows. My dolomite is a 1300 cat d write off that I am using to practice my bodywork skills on. It runs, has an mot and puts a grin on my face every time I drive it. What more do I need?

[mercrocker]

I don't post on the Dolomite forum anymore because my cars are too shit and they'll tell me I need new sills but I can't afford £250 worth of panels + weldage and paint, so they aren't getting new sills, they're getting patched to MOT standard. Yes, the rear doors scuff a bit if you open them with the car jacked up. I suspect the vast majority of Dolomites that haven't been restored or lived mollycoddled lives suffer from the same problem.

I mean I'd love to carry out a full body restoration on my £850 car that would be worth £1200 when it's finished and cost £5k but its just not going to happen. It's not going to snap in half and if you crash a Dolomite you're going to be well fucked regardless of sill strength when modern cars are the size and weight of a Leyland Olympian.

 

I dunno', I have to wonder whether somebody of my social class/financial state belongs in the "classic" world. My main goal is to simply keep the cars on the road as much as possible but is that really enough? I feel like I'm doing a disservice but is anybody else is going to want to restore the 1850HL? There isn't a single straight/rust free panel on it and it's a high mile example of a financially worthless model of car. The 1300 is prettier but thats just the result of long term giffer ownership, it's still crusty in (mostly non-structural) places and is in even worse shape engine-wise.

 

Forward progress is happening for the first time in over a year but sometimes think the money and effort I put in simply isn't enough. It's all a bit "scraping an MOT pass in 1991", but 25 years late.

 

Screw the classic brigade.   You have every right to enjoy and drive the cars as you are.  Owning a proper car does not require you to sit behind it in a gash camping chair with a zip-up fleece and club baseball cap.   Single model forums are all hard work - just treat it like shoplifting in Tesco.  Get in, get what you want and get the fuck out......

[Supernaut]

Got a 1yr old Beko dishwasher on gumtree for £50 today. That's not my grump (pretty chuffed about that, actually).

 

My grump is that I'm so fucking done sharing a house with my brothers. I've been putting in job applications for anywhere else in the UK for the past few days now.

I came home with the replacement dishwasher and started putting it in the kitchen, all while my oldest brother (who earns a fucksight more than me), goes full miser and asks me if I've tried this and that and the next thing with the old dishwasher. NO. IT'S FUCKED. IT PISSES WATER ALL OVER THE KITCHEN AND IT WAS A SECOND HAND FREEBIE SEVERAL YEARS AGO. GIVE UP. "Oh, but have you unscrewed this panel to get to the hinges on the door to see if that'll fix-" NO. IT'S. BROKEN. I HAVE A NEW ONE NOW.

 

The new one is also a whole hell of a lot quieter too, and probably way more energy efficient. The Xantia makes a very good van too.

[michael1703]

The magician "Dynamo"

 

How many times does he have to remind us that he is from "bwadfudd" ?

[Sheefag]

Is that in Wales?

[purplebargeken]

Yes

[Sheefag]

YOU LYING GET!

 

[adw1977]

My main goal is to simply keep the cars on the road as much as possible but is that really enough?

Yes!

[Captain Furious]

Not really a grump, more of a 'well that's just typical me innit'

 

I can't do DIY at all, I fucking hate it and I'm crap at it. Even still, my mum keeps tasking me with 'do you think you could just...’ jobs whenever I'm there. Today was a blind she'd ordered for the landing 'could you just put the brackets up, it's only two screws'

 

What could go wrong with that? Well, apart from getting an inch in and then hitting the lintel, which her two speed cordless drill and chocolate Lidl drill bit set had no chance of penetrating. So after about an hour of polishing the surface, her turning the house upside down because ’she's sure she's seen a drill bit round here somewhere’ it was called off, yet another DIY failure under my belt

 

So feeling great about that, next, the carpet is up on the landing while some bits are being decorated, so she asks 'could you just put a couple of screws in these floorboards because they creak' She proudly produced a new variety box of self tapping wood screws that she'd bought from whatever jumble sale she was last at, which promptly rounded off at the very first hint of tightening. So that 2 minute job turned into a fucking ordeal as well fetching out rounded off screws with pliers 1/8th turn at a time and having to drill pilot holes with her equally shonky drill set

 

FFS stop buying shit just because it's cheap!

 

Left in a right huff

[purplebargeken]

It was until 'the Great Boundary Scandal' of 1969. 

[MarvinsMom]

Not really a grump, more of a 'well that's just typical me innit'

 

I can't do DIY at all, I fucking hate it and I'm crap at it. Even still, my mum keeps tasking me with 'do you think you could just...’ jobs whenever I'm there. Today was a blind she'd ordered for the landing 'could you just put the brackets up, it's only two screws'

 

What could go wrong with that? Well, apart from getting an inch in and then hitting the lintel, which her two speed cordless drill and chocolate Lidl drill bit set had no chance of penetrating. So after about an hour of polishing the surface, her turning the house upside down because ’she's sure she's seen a drill bit round here somewhere’ it was called off, yet another DIY failure under my belt

 

So feeling great about that, next, the carpet is up on the landing while some bits are being decorated, so she asks 'could you just put a couple of screws in these floorboards because they creak' She proudly produced a new variety box of self tapping wood screws that she'd bought from whatever jumble sale she was last at, which promptly rounded off at the very first hint of tightening. So that 2 minute job turned into a fucking ordeal as well fetching out rounded off screws with pliers 1/8th turn at a time and having to drill pilot holes with her equally shonky drill set

 

FFS stop buying shit just because it's cheap!

 

Left in a right huff

 

you are me.... AICMFP

[Captain Furious]

I was actually looking forward to a few beers tonight, but DIY has left me so physically and emotionally drained I'm not sure I can face it

 

Feel bad for her really, she sees all this tat being offered in the deals section of local supermarkets and buys it, well intentioned, thinking 'that'll come in handy one day'. But doesn't realise that there are tools, and then there are supermarket bargain section tools.

 

I still have a spanner set she got me as a present for starting my first ever job, or rather, I still have a set of half rings and prongs.

[saucedoctor]

My Dad's like that. While very practical, he always buys cheap shit (like BlackSpur drill bits) and then spends a whole day doing something that should take an hour tops. I'm no Tommy Walsh, but I've "lightly restored" a few houses, and one of the first hard lessons I learned was "Don't buy cheap drill bits or screws". Dad was putting up a Velux blind in my sister's house and it all went to ratshit due to said Shiny Shit From China©®. He came round and got my Makita drill bits, PROPER Rawlplugs and those very high quality screws that they make in Newtownards (can't remember  the name). Job done in no time. I get that sort of stuff from our local builders suppliers, and it's not that dear to begin with, and works out a whole lot cheaper long-term.

 

One of the guys at Sullatober Building Supplies told me once: "We don't sell cheap stuff. Big hairy builders get pissed off when stuff doesn't work, or breaks"

[Cavcraft]

Feel your pain at the DIY shizzles. I did make a Frank Spencer-esque rabbit run which is still going after about 4 years though. Based on that raging success, I'm going to get some old (free) pallets and try and make some bird boxes out of them. 

[Captain Furious]

I can't even remember what brand these drill bits were, but half way through she said (obviously thinking it was me that was the issue in this equation) 'it's not the drill bits, these weren't cheap ones from Lidl'

 

So I googled them and the first place that came up selling them...Lidl. We did both have a laugh about that which lightened the mood temporarily..

 

Bad workman always blames his tools, in this case it was definitely both.