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Posted

Son has got himself internally excluded from school for the second time in 2 weeks, any ideas on getting a 12 year old not to be a dick in school and actually follow instructions? Other than working one to one with him?

 

I threatened my step son (13) with putting him in another school following behavioral issues bought on by his choice of 'friends'. His smart arse answer was 'well, that wouldn't do anything because I know everyone around here' so my response was; I didn't mean a school around here. There was an instant dramatic decline in his educational tomfoolery.

 

I had spent a good hour waffling on to him about how he is destroying his only (free) shot at having a decent career in life and the rewards that it brings over dossing and being a complete dinkle. We'd also reached the end of our tether with him and his 'don't give a shit' attitude.

We've spoken to the school numerous times about this but their turnover of staff really didn't help, it is like they are solely focused on the kids that will help them reach their targets and the ones that need a different approach can get lost.

 

The schools communications are fairly dire, full of optimism with no long term consistency although he is on a report which his teachers score everyday, some can't be arsed but most do and then we report on it too with his attitude at home. He is trying and he is certainly improving. Detentions he was getting near on every day leading to isolation and he was just walking out of those, it was pretty tragic. I had one detention in the entire time I was at school and that was a class one!

 

Kids just want to be rich when they get older, he wants to be a mountain biker as his full time job... that's it, nothing else, just mountain biking. Someone is going to pay him to ride a mountain bike.  

 

I really, really do worry for the future.

 

That aside, he's a kid and he doesn't know what's around the corner so the main thing is to get him set back on the right path even if it means going against my traditional values and having to cut him some slack sometimes for the petty stuff but when he's slipping, all hell rains down. (His Mum does that bit).

Posted

My yearly finances spreadsheet is looking grim...

 

finances.JPG

 

Two of the people I know from college have just bought their first houses, £200k new builds, another is still saving up as they want something more around the £230k mark, they can all afford financed cars, gym memberships, Netflix, etc. I suspect I may be the group failure...

 

I don't even want a £200k house, I just want 2-bed semi with a driveway and a shit car, which is an inconceivable dream...

Welcome to my world.

Posted

The promised snow is actually slushy rain meaning I now have a wet head and damp drivers seat

Really should try to solve the leaky sunroof but if it’s parked up hill or it is actually snow it doesn’t come in!

  • Like 2
Posted

My yearly finances spreadsheet is looking grim...

 

attachicon.giffinances.JPG

 

Two of the people I know from college have just bought their first houses, £200k new builds, another is still saving up as they want something more around the £230k mark, they can all afford financed cars, gym memberships, Netflix, etc. I suspect I may be the group failure...

 

I don't even want a £200k house, I just want 2-bed semi with a driveway and a shit car, which is an inconceivable dream...

So that's 3 people out of how many?

 

And how much is financed by the bank of mum and dad and by maxing out credit cards?

 

I really think you're been too hard on yourself - lets see who the failure(s) is/are when they can't get any more credit.

 

I don't see what you say is an inconceivable dream - I didn't buy my 1st house until I was 28 and lots of people start even later now.

Posted

To elaborate on my earlier post, I feel in the same boat as Cpt_70s.

 

I'm 31, though! I feel like I'm sitting by watching all my friends get married off and buying houses while I'm scratching about still unsure of WTF I want to do and no signs of a house or a partner in sight. My finances aren't dire, but still not enough to comfortably have my own place in this area.

 

All I want is also a smoll, shit house to keep my smoll, shit self and car at. A driveway would be nice, then I'd have the space to own more than one car!

Posted

Reason why I left bookfarce all those years ago... Every ones totally amazing lives they were all living. New dog, new job, new house, new kidz, amazing parties, on holibobs again but this time much more better, dinner cooked by a chef, new car, new this, new that, awesome this, can't believe how lucky I am to have such great fucking parents that...

 

And bookfarce knows when you are at the pit of your life being swallowed up in a toilet because it'll send you these airy fucking fairy reminders on just how well everybody else is doing EXCEPT YOU! 

 

You see, when people are miserable they do and buy all this shit and have to tell the world because it makes them feel better, eases the pain. THEY'RE STILL MISERABLE!

Posted

To elaborate on my earlier post, I feel in the same boat as Cpt_70s.

 

I'm 31, though! I feel like I'm sitting by watching all my friends get married off and buying houses while I'm scratching about still unsure of WTF I want to do and no signs of a house or a partner in sight. My finances aren't dire, but still not enough to comfortably have my own place in this area.

 

All I want is also a smoll, shit house to keep my smoll, shit self and car at. A driveway would be nice, then I'd have the space to own more than one car!

This brings back memories to me as I was the last one of my 'group' to get married, at 35. I didn't meet her until I was 33.

 

Until the kids came along it cost little more to live for the two of us than individually so we had a lot more money.

Posted

A light FWD car with narrow tyres is the best in the snow.

What's engine braking like with a CVT 'box?

It's fine if you leave the shifter in the DS (Drive Slope) position. Very little in D,freewheels down hills.
  • Like 1
Posted

I had a parcel sent from NL once, but they used the post office there - Post NL. Unfortunately, when it got to the UK, their delivery partners were useless fuckwits YODEL, so they fucked about pretending the address didn't exist (house their 80+ years) then pretended to deliver it. Then pretended to lose it. Eventually it arrived back in Eindhoven with the sender 13wks later.

 

I got them to resend it with the Dutch PO, but this time to Ireland, as here they actually use the local PO to do their work. Arrived within 3 days.

Turns out my parcel has been in the post office over the road from here for the last fortnight, only I had no idea. Brilliant.

What happened to letting me know they failed to deliver? GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

Posted

Reason why I left bookfarce all those years ago... Every ones totally amazing lives they were all living. New dog, new job, new house, new kidz, amazing parties, on holibobs again but this time much more better, dinner cooked by a chef, new car, new this, new that, awesome this, can't believe how lucky I am to have such great fucking parents that...

 

This.  Social media can be incredibly damaging as it can give the illusion - and usually it is an illusion - that others are doing so much better than you and living an enviable life, when the reality behind the scenes is often so different.

 

Fir coat and no knickers springs to mind for some people, giving the impression to the world that they're doing wonderfully with new car, exotic holidays and the rest, when in reality they're one bill away from losing everything and being kept afloat by parents and credit cards.

  • Like 6
Posted

This.  Social media can be incredibly damaging as it can give the illusion - and usually it is an illusion - that others are doing so much better than you and living an enviable life, when the reality behind the scenes is often so different.

 

Fir coat and no knickers springs to mind for some people, giving the impression to the world that they're doing wonderfully with new car, exotic holidays and the rest, when in reality they're one bill away from losing everything and being kept afloat by parents and credit cards.

 

Very much so. Some people have always liked to show off, this is natural and gone on for millennia, its just much more easily facilitated nowadays and harder to see the full picture. Anti-social media has made self-promotion and publicity so much easier and all you see are the 'good' things people want you to see.

It is always worth remembering that 'an empty vessel makes the greatest sound'.

  • Like 5
Posted

All very true.

 

My facebook feed is set up so it doesn't show updates from individuals (well, a very select few who aren't the typical empty vessel types) and thus it's just full of weird / shit memes and weird / shit old cars most of the time. It keeps me happy. I don't really post anything myself and just use it for messages and events.

 

It still doesn't quell the constant internal monologue of "what the fuck am I doing?!"

Posted

 

It still doesn't quell the constant internal monologue of "what the fuck am I doing?!"

 

Meh, never listen to yourself like that. Chances are you're an idiot like everyone else you see, so ignoring your own advice is best...

Posted

My grump is I've got my second cold of the winter, I don't get colds normally :(

Posted

My grump is I've got my second cold of the winter, I don't get colds normally :(

Well that serves you right for liking and trying to enjoy winter doesn’t it!

 

I’ve been hating really hard on winter this year and not had any colds.

  • Like 2
Posted

I blame all the people who keep bringing colds into my office.

Posted

I blame all the people who keep bringing colds into my office.

 

NHS innit.

Posted

NHS innit.

 

Aye lad, that's the daft bit. We all get sick pay n all so why turn up just to act ill, do nothing & infect everyone else?

  • Like 1
Posted

Top tip- LEAVE FACEBOOK.  It's pure poison.

 

Nah just use it properly.

 

Don't have it set to follow any friends & you don't see the rubbish. Then join groups you're interested in & get interesting stuff appear. My newsfeed consists of history all the way from pre-historic upto the cold war, aircraft, ships & bikes.

  • Like 3
Posted

Top tip- LEAVE FACEBOOK. It's pure poison.

Aye, you can leave Facebook and keep Messenger, which is the only useful thing now that no one uses MSN messenger.
  • Like 1
Posted

Facebook is fine. It is people who are problem.

Unless it's your data security that concerns you.

  • Like 2
Posted

Nah just use it properly.

 

Don't have it set to follow any friends & you don't see the rubbish. Then join groups you're interested in & get interesting stuff appear. My newsfeed consists of history all the way from pre-historic upto the cold war, aircraft, ships & bikes.

Same here, mine's full of vacuum cleaners, old cars and the shit some idiot called Andy Hooli posts (must turn off notifications from him, he's bad news that Andy)

Posted

Same here, mine's full of vacuum cleaners, old cars and the shit some idiot called Andy Hooli posts (must turn off notifications from him, he's bad news that Andy)

Funnily enough Beko, I saw an ad for the cordless Henry on Facebook the other day and one of the comments was a YouTube video. It was you posting your cordless Henry/Dyson comparison. I didn’t buy a vacuum but did enjoy your video!

 

 

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

  • Like 1
Posted

To elaborate on my earlier post, I feel in the same boat as Cpt_70s.

 

I'm 31, though! I feel like I'm sitting by watching all my friends get married off and buying houses while I'm scratching about still unsure of WTF I want to do and no signs of a house or a partner in sight. My finances aren't dire, but still not enough to comfortably have my own place in this area.

 

All I want is also a smoll, shit house to keep my smoll, shit self and car at. A driveway would be nice, then I'd have the space to own more than one car!

 

 

I only gave a shit about having 'things' when I had significant social media.  Everything that people put on there is a curation and an artifice.  Happy couples are often miserable, houses are bought with no actual money, etc.  

 

There's a couple of my road that bought their house at the same time we did.  It's quite a lot bigger than ours.  Ours is a small three-bed.  We turfed our garden (new build), put up a shed, flowerbeds, etc.  When we used to look at the other gardens, their's was just weeds.  And it still is, more than six months on.  Thick with weeds.  We had no idea why the fuck they'd buy a house and not - at least - seed the lawn.

 

Our next door neighbour then told us that they had spent every singe available Penny on that house and they didn't have a pot to piss in.  They'd worked themselves right into a big financial hole with it.  If their interest rate goes up, they're fucked.  But on the outside, they have a big house with a brand new car and look happy.  Truth is, they're financially crippled to the point that they won't buy a spade for the garden.

 

That put it into perspective for me.  I'm fortunate to have had help with my house from relatives and a partner that earns well - but I earn less than Captain_70s (no offence, mate!).  I'm very lucky.  That's all it is.  Luck.  

 

You're a nice person, SP.  You'll get your luck.

Posted

Just checked my bank account and DVLA have been carrying on taking VED payments for a car I scrapped at the end of November.  I even have the doobery thing from them saying I'm no longer the registered keeper.  The car is still showing as taxed online, even though (presumably) a CoD has been issued.  I've cancelled the direct debit now, but WTF?  Typically it's too late to call them now so going to have to try and get up in time to do it before I leave for work in the morning.  FFS.

Posted

I only gave a shit about having 'things' when I had significant social media. Everything that people put on there is a curation and an artifice. Happy couples are often miserable, houses are bought with no actual money, etc.

 

There's a couple of my road that bought their house at the same time we did. It's quite a lot bigger than ours. Ours is a small three-bed. We turfed our garden (new build), put up a shed, flowerbeds, etc. When we used to look at the other gardens, their's was just weeds. And it still is, more than six months on. Thick with weeds. We had no idea why the fuck they'd buy a house and not - at least - seed the lawn.

 

Our next door neighbour then told us that they had spent every singe available Penny on that house and they didn't have a pot to piss in. They'd worked themselves right into a big financial hole with it. If their interest rate goes up, they're fucked. But on the outside, they have a big house with a brand new car and look happy. Truth is, they're financially crippled to the point that they won't buy a spade for the garden.

 

That put it into perspective for me. I'm fortunate to have had help with my house from relatives and a partner that earns well - but I earn less than Captain_70s (no offence, mate!). I'm very lucky. That's all it is. Luck.

 

You're a nice person, SP. You'll get your luck.

Lend them a spade and see if they use it.

 

I guarantee they are watching net fux

Posted

Just checked my bank account and DVLA have been carrying on taking VED payments for a car I scrapped at the end of November. I even have the doobery thing from them saying I'm no longer the registered keeper. The car is still showing as taxed online, even though (presumably) a CoD has been issued. I've cancelled the direct debit now, but WTF? Typically it's too late to call them now so going to have to try and get up in time to do it before I leave for work in the morning. FFS.

Do they charge interest when you get caught for no tax. They should pay a fine if they take tax that isn't theirs.

Posted

You're a nice person, SP.

post-19977-0-19843700-1548791861_thumb.gif

 

 

 

 

But honestly, I do try. Thanks.

 

  • Like 1

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