What makes you grin? Antidote to grumpy thread

[Station]

Saab cup holder:

 

http://i.imgur.com/lpRNmrt.gifv

[twosmoke300]

Missis used to carry a bale of hay or up to 3 bags of feed on the back of her er5

[dollywobbler]

I can't find mention of it now, but I recall doing a story at some point on a Jag XK150 that someone had been using to move hay bales around on a farm. Now that's classy.

[M'coli]

The farmer that I worked for in the early 90s used to wind up the guys on the Porsche stand at the Scottish Motor Show that the rear spoiler on a 911 Turbo was "just the thing to get a couple o' bales roon tae the heifers!"

[vulgalour]

Applause good!  Very comfortable, very nippy and feels like a quality product and that's just as a passenger.

[michael1703]

Missis used to carry a bale of hay or up to 3 bags of feed on the back of her er5

A friend of mine bungeed her Christmas tree across the pillion seat of her R6, it was as wide as the carriageway

[wuvvum]

On the way into work today I passed a Tesla Model S with the registration P1NTO, which I thought was an odd choice.

 

Part of me hopes there's an old Sierra somewhere out there registered as B477ERY to restore equilibrium to the universe.

[beko1987]

Just had one of those "Hi Sir, I'm calling regarding your recent car accident" phone calls. Kept them going for a good 10 minutes claiming amnesia. Then they hung up on me, bastards! I want my compo for the accident that I can't remember!

[conkerman]

It must have been a bad one then, you deserve your compo and clegg

[fordperv]

On the way into work today I passed a Tesla Model S with the registration P1NTO, which I thought was an odd choice.

 

Part of me hopes there's an old Sierra somewhere out there registered as B477ERY to restore equilibrium to the universe.

Isn't pinto a Brazilian slang word for small penis

 

I was hoping the same so I checked the reg B477ERY is on a 2011 shogun

[wuvvum]

Well that's crapped on my Coco Pops.

[Tamworthbay]

image.jpeg

I make no comment about this, but the streets of Aberdeen will be deserted later

good curry last night was it?

[darkfour]

Grump turned into a grin.

 

My grandfather passed away at the beginning of January this year (he was 95) and I had to fly back to the UK for his funeral. Anyways, all his possession have now passed to my mum and she handed me his list of cars that he owned.

 

I should have signed him up on here!

 

[phil_lihp]

Out of curiosity I checked up on a couple of registrations for cars I used to own on the MOT history checker thing.  My 1998 Fiesta 1.25, bought in 2005 and sold in 2007 with patched up sills, bubbling arches and a leaking radiator, was still going until recently, I was astonished to see it from time to time looking exceedingly ropey but still roadworthy, living less than a mile from the sea too but it's finally gone where all good Fiestas go, the last MOT obviously was one too many.

 

It did well, 125,000 miles on the clock at that point and it was hardly in good condition when I had it, having obviously been in a fairly nasty accident at some point in its life which showed up in a mismatched N/S wing and permanently wonky wheel geometry which my garage and a tyre centre were totally unable to prevent from constantly scrubbing the inside edge of one tyre.

 

I'm not overly surprised the owner threw in the towel though, that is one hell of a fail sheet!  

 

Reason(s) for failure

Parking brake: efficiency below requirements (3.7.B.7)

offside rear Registration plate lamp not working (1.1.C.1d)

Fuel cap/sealing device does not fasten securely maintaining the sealing arrangement (7.2.4b)

offside front Headlamp aim too low (1.

nearside rear Body has a sharp edge caused by corrosion wheel arch (6.1.C.1)

nearside front Front constant velocity joint gaiter deteriorated to the extent that it no longer prevents the ingress of dirt etc (2.5.C.1a)

offside front Front constant velocity joint gaiter deteriorated to the extent that it no longer prevents the ingress of dirt etc (2.5.C.1a)

offside front Track rod end excessively corroded and unserviceable nut rusted away (2.2.C.1d)

Power steering pump leaking from a failed seal (2.3.3b)

offside front Brake hose excessively deteriorated (3.6.B.4d)

nearside front lower Suspension arm ball joint dust cover excessively deteriorated so that it no longer prevents the ingress of dirt (2.4.G.2)

nearside front Body or chassis has excessive corrosion, seriously affecting its strength within 30cm of the body mountings floor/chassis (6.1.B.2)

offside rear inner Suspension component mounting prescribed area is excessively corroded sill rear beam mounting (2.4.A.3)

nearside rear inner Suspension component mounting prescribed area is excessively corroded sill beam mounting (2.4.A.3)

nearside front Subframe mounting prescribed area is excessively corroded subframe mounting (2.4.A.3)

Fuel hose insecure both of fuel filler pipes insecure and also hose clamps rusted away (7.2.1)

Fuel tank leaking fuel filler pipe rusted on the tank broken away (7.2.3)

offside rear Steering system has a tyre fouling a part of the vehicle road wheel rubbing on handbrake cable nearly through (2.2.D.2a)

nearside rear Trailing arm rubber bush deteriorated resulting in excessive movement beam mounting bush (2.4.G.2)

offside rear Trailing arm rubber bush deteriorated resulting in excessive movement beam mounting (2.4.G.2)

nearside front lower Suspension arm has excessive play in a ball joint (2.4.G.2)

nearside front Brake hose excessively deteriorated (3.6.B.4d)

nearside front Brake pipe excessively corroded in wheel arch (3.6.B.2c)

offside front Brake pipe excessively corroded in wheel arch also leaking brake fluid (3.6.B.2c)

nearside front lower Anti-roll bar linkage ball joint dust cover excessively damaged so that it no longer prevents the ingress of dirt (2.4.G.2)

nearside front Front wheel bearing has excessive play (2.5.A.3c)

nearside front inner Suspension arm rubber bush deteriorated resulting in excessive movement rear bush (2.4.G.2)

offside front inner Suspension arm rubber bush deteriorated resulting in excessive movement rear bush (2.4.G.2)

Hazard warning tell tale not working correctly (1.4.B.1e)

 

Advisory notice item(s)

items removed from drivers view prior to testing

nearside front door pillar corroded and holed in door shut

rear wiper blade missing

offside front tyre worn on outer edge

nearside front brake disc worn, pitted or scored, but not seriously weakened (3.5.1i)

offside front brake disc worn, pitted or scored, but not seriously weakened (3.5.1i)

both of front to rear fuel pipes rusty

nearside rear tyre perishing in the tread

offside rear tyre perishing in tread

nearside front coil spring corroded (2.4.C.1b)

offside front coil spring corroded (2.4.C.1b)

all of vehicle underside rusty

[Tamworthbay]

Is that the longest ever failure sheet or can someone on here beat it?

[phil_lihp]

R262 KSG, I'll find a photo at some point, it saw me through a lot of changes in my life and was worked hard but it had endless niggly problems so I eventually traded it in for a Focus which was even worse.

[Pillock]

At that point, with the roof apparently unrusty, I'd have lobbed an axe through it or something just to complete the set.

[scaryoldcortina]

Looks like the windscreen was ok...

[Slappy]

Thought I saw our favourite Renault (NI Division) botherer's perfect plate tonight: R7UKE which it turns out is on a  9-3 floppytop and in Havant. Alas I was 2 digits out...

[xtriple]

For the first time in many a week I actually slept last night. Consequently, I am feeling far more 'with it' today. Now, if I can just eradicate the plague of spots from my face (I look like a super-annuated teenager!), back, shoulders, bollocks and surrounding areas, all will be well in my world!

 

Also, received my first (of many I expect   ) Valentines card today - from Stanley, the dog I sponsor at Dogs trust. There were no flowers but there was a packet of DIY ones with it!

 

I shall sell the seeds to some druggy bastard down on the seafront as a rare, new high.

[Tickman]

Filling up the car with petrol today and an Audi R8 with a private plate (two letter and two number job) pulls in to do the same which must be worth 40k + made me smile as I was at Asda, cheap skates, I would have thought these run better on 99ron.

[privatewire]

good curry last night was it?

 

i had tried to post up a picture from my phone, but it was tiny, so epic fail#1, i then thought i had deleted the post, epic fail #2.

 

i iz nob.

[155V6]

I saw another car with an Autoshite sticker today,X reg Rover 75 coming up through Hale at around 5.00 PM 

[richardthestag]

Living the dream.

 

Parked in the car park of a casino 1200 miles from home.

 

Apparently unrestored with amazing patina.

 

My daily drive if money was no object. 

[andy18s]

Stopped off at Morrys on the way home, as you do

Came out to this parked literally 1/2 an inch from my front bumper.

 

Do Alpina still do Beemers?

Can't be assed to check myself.....

 

Also spotted these earlier on the day

 

 

 

Also found a tidy Freelander for sale near me......any one want a P38? ??????

 

Sent from my SM-G920F using Tapatalk

[doobietoo]

Last night my computer died it kept turning off and crashing then would not turn on at all...... I came home tonight took the hard drive out, put it back in and three hours later its still working normally ......     :-D        

[myglaren]

^ Just needed to be out in the fresh air a while - they get cabin fever

[The Moog]

59 plate Volvo in my works car park.

 

 

Didn't think anyone bothered with krooklocks nowadays!

[Richard]

Is that the longest ever failure sheet or can someone on here beat it?

 

I was given an Allegro years ago that might have beaten that, it was certainly the fullest fail sheet I've ever seen. I fixed it all within the two weeks too, potentially giving me a year of "why the fuck did I bother" motoring. I tried to give it away more than once and still can't remember what happened to it in the end.

[Alfamale]

Stopped off at Morrys on the way home, as you do

Came out to this parked literally 1/2 an inch from my front bumper.

20160209_180439.jpg

Do Alpina still do Beemers?

Can't be assed to check myself.....

 

Happy to be corrected but that looks like someone has just stuck an alpina badge on their BMW As Alpina badge their diesel 5-series as the D5. Not even sure they were tweeking diesel 5-series back then either.