What makes you grin? Antidote to grumpy thread

[Cavcraft]

The road bike tyres are the opposite though in my experience, brilliant things that last for ages and never seem to get punctures. So that's that jinxed then.

 

 

I really am not making this up: cleaning the road bike ready to ride to work on Thursday. Rear tyre? Flatter than a witch's tit. 

[Tayne]

What? Autos use more fuel than manuals in my experience.

 

That would be what I meant to write.

[skattrd]

I'm wanting an auto at present as it's more relaxed driving when there's much driving to be done, but the manufacturers figures for the equivalent auto version of my boring tdi are more than 10mpg less for the auto. I am too much of a tightarse to live with that. Plus vag autos are apparently pooh.

I thinkI may just get cruise control retrofitted to the boring for more relaxed motorway driving.

[M'coli]

...but when you get that knackered battery or starter, its got to be a manual.

 

FTFY

[DS20]

I've yet to meet a car I preferred with an automatic transmission over a manual transmission. And don't get me started on Volkswagen's DSG system. It's a lurching disaster that tried to kill me at a junction: stationary, waiting to pull out - spot gap in traffic - accelerate - nothing happens - accelerator flat on floor - huge revving from engine but no movement - sudden and violent engagement of drive, with wheelspin - nearly end up with fangry Ford Fiesta in the boot.

 

Never again

[Junkman]

 

...but when you get that knackered battery or starter, its time to use your other auto chod until it's fixed.

FTFY

FTFY

[Bobthebeard]

I'm wanting an auto at present as it's more relaxed driving when there's much driving to be done, but the manufacturers figures for the equivalent auto version of my boring tdi are more than 10mpg less for the auto. I am too much of a tightarse to live with that. Plus vag autos are apparently pooh.

I thinkI may just get cruise control retrofitted to the boring for more relaxed motorway driving.

Fuel consumption on the latest (auto) Accord is actually slightly better than the outgoing manual one as an average. The last one did 28 to 32 mpg ish. 32 all day on the motorway providing no traffic jams/stop start stuff. The replacement does 26 to 40 mpg under the same conditions. At 70 mph the last one was revving at around 3,000. The Auto around 2,000. Mind you, the last one was a 2 litre. This one is a 2.4. So far in around 3,000 miles since changing the auto is definitely better on fuel overall. Plus this one has cruise control. Last one did not, makes a difference IMHO.

[eddyramrod]

I have not had a manual of the same car I had an auto of to offer a proper scientific answer unfortunately. 

 

I have.  25 years apart mind: in 1985 I had a mk1 Granada, 3.0 auto.  In 2010, a mk1 Granada, 2.5 manual.  Both Essex V6, so there should be nothing to choose between them in the economy* stakes.  And lo and behold, I couldn't see a difference, not that way at least.

 

Given even the slightest choice, I would never choose manual over auto.  And especially not in a Granada, although the chances are I've had my last one of those anyway...

[purplebargeken]

Got dragged to the grand opening of the Trust education centre this evening. Nice place and very posh. Wine available, canapes, fruit juice, cake. Cake! Grabbed a napkin with a couple of canapes, glass of apple juice. Lovely. Walked back and dropped the lot on the brand new carpet....... oops.

 

We had a room with a display running about the team that I work for. Nice selection of cards, pamphlets and pens. The senior manager laid out some pads for the CBT service. We looked at them for 3 seconds. Errrmm, who spell checked the proofs? Four managers did. Hmm, they couldn't spell 'prescription'. Major WTF moment ensued, much hiding of now useless pads. Oh how we laughed, and laughed. 

[brickwall]

Nothing like your leaders fucking up

[STUNO]

 The senior manager laid out some pads for the CBT service. Oh how we laughed, and laughed. 

 

Am I missing something about what you do for a living ?

[Bobthebeard]

Am I missing something about what you do for a living ?

Wondered about that myself, but laughed politely anyway!

[HillmanImp]

Nothing like your leaders fucking up

 

I fucked up my Visa leader yesterday if that counts?

[vulgalour]

Got the Princess summed up perfectly tonight.

 

 

I'LL GET IT

[purplebargeken]

Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, not the other thing that CBT stands for. Fake 'prescription' pads for prescribing CBT only some bell end had okayed 'perscription' instead. The senior manager was actually gutted which made the laughing even more satisfying. 

[STUNO]

Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, not the other thing that CBT stands for. Fake 'prescription' pads for prescribing CBT only some bell end had okayed 'perscription' instead. The senior manager was actually gutted which made the laughing even more satisfying. 

 

 

OH Silly me . But I do think the mis-spelling getting through is brilliant, remember , not even the printers proof-reader could spell.

OH Silly me . But they don't use those useless type people anymore.

[richardmorris]

OH Silly me . But I do think the mis-spelling getting through is brilliant, remember , not even the printers proof-reader could spell.

OH Silly me . But they don't use those useless type people anymore.

 

 

Printers don't tend to proof read things themselves anymore -- they put the onus back on you to check it's what you want and then give them the ok.

[Louise2cv]

Just having a quick look through OH's facebook (I'm nosy, and he has more friends than me WAH).

I thought you guys would *love* this little exchange:

it is a robin ?
20 mins · Like · 1

close,its a reliant kitten van like Del boy`s
19 mins · Like

ask its sitting in the tree thought it might be a robin lol
17 mins · Like · 1

some ppl call them a robin reliant kitten so i suppose you are correct lol.

 

 

 

Obviously it is a Rialto that they are talking about.

 

Also:

 

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2162039/Theyre-parking-wrong-tree-Villagers-shock-Reliant-Robin-perched-precariously-branches-15ft-ground.html

 

 

 

This is where the pic came from. (I think the DM originally reported on the Robin Reliant, but were contacted by enough pedants/geeks to at least correct the order of incorrect car name).

 

Happy Wednesday.

[Craig the Princess]

Mrs the Princess cannot open this post until tomorrow (if she is reading this).

 

 

I have been to the bodyshop today to pick up two Metro front wings for the Metro Mayfair, they look awsome. They are Mrs the Princess' birthday present tomorrow so I just need to find somewhere indoors safe to hide two freshly painted wings.

 

 

Before with rusty Oporto wings

 

 

As now with slightly less rusty blue wings.

 

I'm very excited.

 

[mat_the_cat]

Allow me a moment to fully consider the kind of reaction I would get if I purchased car body panels (freshly painted or otherwise) as a birthday present.

[320touring]

Autoshitists have been most supportive of my blog-thanks for all the help.

 

I've even joined twitter,despite it being the only thing I agree with Cameron on-"too many tweets makes a twat"

 

 

that, and the fact that the mg zt-t with lpg and eml on I found seems to have drawn out the estate fetishists on here

Cheers!

[320touring]

Allow me a moment to fully consider the kind of reaction I would get if I purchased car body panels (freshly painted or otherwise) as a birthday present.

The christmas after she got the mk1 golf cab, the burd received 500 quids worth of parts for it as her present.

 

To date, she's fitted about half of them-self taught with my supervision. The back end is complete-now its oil pumps etc..

 

She enjoys it but shifts can get in the way. Must crack the whip.

[xtriple]

I just got asked out! By a woman! What is the world coming to when a decrepit old insane cripple can't hobble about minding his own business without women asking them out?

 

No, she didn't have a white stick and a labrador (got a spanial) or a carer before any of you gits suggest such a thing....

 

I made a joke of it and turned her down though as I am just not in the mood to go out with another woman.

 

Oh, and she's got an Audi... enough reason to turn her down I felt!

[Skizzer]

How extravagant you are, throwing away women like that. Someday they may be scarce. 

 

(Claude Rains in Casablanca)

[DVee8]

 

This made me smile

[chaseracer]

(Of beetroot, a while back...)

 

Wor lass grates it and raw carrot up and puts it in salads. It's much nicer than all the green leafy things that go in too.

 

She makes a damn fine bacon sarnie too 

[chaseracer]

Quality I think it would be hilarious* if someone with a 70s vintage motor had the gash mag and put it on their passenger seat at car shows, that would get the bearded bunch hot under the collar when they spot it

 

"Trigger to the beige courtesy phone..."

 

 

[chaseracer]

And in other news: I got published!  Cheers, Dugong!

 

 

[EssDeeWon]

Following the problems with Santander over the last week or so I complained officially yesterday, anyway I got the funds returned again by COB yesterday so thats good...

 

Then today I get a phone call from someone on the complaints team "Hi Mr Customer we are very sorry about whats happened would you like 45 quid paid into your account as an apology from us?"

 

Err yeah sure, just an apology would of done but I'll take the 45 sovs anyway 

[Caffiend]

... I'll take the 45 sovs anyway 

Caveat um, whatever the Latin for customer is. Check there's no conditions attached. After right royally fucking me over, Santander offered me 75 quid compensation provided that I signed a form promising that I wouldn't report them to the Financial Ombudsman for right royally fucking me over. Bear in mind that at this point I'm in 3 months arrears on my mortgage* and unemployed. I was SO pissed off with them that I told them where they could stick their derisory £75 as I'd like to keep my options open, thx. Following that conversation I had no further problems with said fuckery until I got a job and had to repay the lot instantly, or pay £25 a month for the additional pleasure** of them sending me a letter every month to remind me about my mortgage arrears until I'd paid them back. Fucking bastards. (I'm now with HSBC. They're fucking bastards as well, just ones that haven't managed to really piss me off yet.)

 

*I wished to consult with Santander about An Arrangement following 2009 redundancy. Apparently, I wasn't supposed to press the button for "having difficulty paying my mortgage" until *after* I hadn't been able to pay it, rather than before ... so much for trying to be responsible. Lost in system, blah blah blah, several months of increasingly shouty - on my part - phone calls being passed from pillar to post trying to Get Something Done.