Just supposing....

[Micrashed]

Someone held a gun to your head and told you you had to run a Kettle Series engine until the end of time or they would blow your brains out and bugger your dog too....

Which one would you have?

The

1.1

1.4

1.6

1.8

2.5V6

 

?

[John F]

Saved! I don't have a dog.

[dollywobbler]

1.4 for me, in 16v flavour. Zingy, cheap tax, good economy. The tricky bit is deciding which car. 

[cms206]

1.4 16v in an FSO Caro for extra shite points.

[phil_lihp]

1.6 in a 416 hatchback - learnt to drive in one, fast, revvy and not too bad on fuel.

[Micrashed]

1.4 for me, in 16v flavour. Zingy, cheap tax, good economy. The tricky bit is deciding which car. 

Possibly this one with a caramac leather inside - if it were diesel I would be all over it like that rash on my bollocks i developed after a night on the lash in Chorlton....

1400cc of Russian HGF Roulette 

[dollywobbler]

K-Series won't have turbo lag, and won't be too far behind on economy while also being cheaper to tax. I really dislike those facelift ones though. The arse end looks dreadful and the number plate is now in a crap place if you want to fit a tow bar. Not so much facelift, as faceruin.

[Pillock]

Is that a factory panel gap around the boot? They really did give up towards the end didn't they?

[Micrashed]

The arse end looks dreadful and the number plate is now in a crap place if you want to fit a tow bar. Not so much facelift, as faceruin.

Yeah, but just look at that interior though....

[Wilko220]

I have had a 1.6 and two 2.5 V6s and purchased all of them voluntarily without any threats, sexual or otherwise, towards my pets.

 

Here's my latest

 

 

That's not me, by the way.

[barefoot]

It's clearly a dream or a nightmare or some kind of bizarre hypotheses

So I'll have the v6 please

[Barry Cade]

any or all of them, the K series is a brilliant engine. Apart from the V6's- they're a pain in the arse.

[Vince70]

I would have one of each so hopefully you could have one runner while the other 4 are in pieces having modified Land rover head gaskets and new water pumps fitted.

[fordperv]

if any of the kettle series for me it would be the 1.4 like i had in all of my rover runarounds

 

would have to be in a pre facelift 214si 3 door, none of that blingy grille for me

 

 

i used to have one like this but it was silver, i loved its k series goodness, i also had 3 other 214si but they were 5 doors and i had a 414si, great motors but i mustve been a glutton for punishment lol

[Lord Sterling]

I already have one and no gun was held to my head. As you know I have the 2.5 KV6 Sterling:

 

 

The engines in these are wonderfully silky smooth, ok were not talking 4.0 or even 3.2 Jaguar quality but this is the best 800 Rover eventually came up with, I honestly think though, it was too late, they really ought to gave brought the engine and interior quality* long before.

 

The problem though, and there are plenty, the liners move about too much in the engine making it prone to HGF. Even if the Head Gasket was solid, you still gave the worry of changing no less than 4 cambelts, and if like me your still a novice with spanners jobs like this can become very expensive, taking all that into account, its not hard to see why these are unloved.

 

Having said all that, I absolutely adore the Rover 800 with the KV6, this won't be my last KV6.

[Lankytim]

1.4, every time. Least HG prone and sparking performance.

[Barry Cade]

I'm gonna throw the cat amongst the pidgins here and say the MLS Land Rover gasket is a crock of shite. If your K series shats its head gasket, ITS YOUR FAULT.

[Lankytim]

Good point there, but I think even well cared for K series lumps can turn their oil into spunk with little or no provocation. Isn't there a problem with thermal shock when the thermostat opens and allows a load of cold water into the head or something?

[wuvvum]

From what I've seen, the early carb'd 1.1 litre K-series in the Metros seem to be the least HGF prone of the bunch.  A nice early Metro 1.1S wouldn't be too unpleasant a thing to potter around in.

[Barry Cade]

Good point there, but I think even well cared for K series lumps can turn their oil into spunk with little or no provocation. Isn't there a problem with thermal shock when the thermostat opens and allows a load of cold water into the head or something?

 

Only if you drag race it from an Arctic morning with ice cubes in your rad. There is much bollock talked about K series. How many Eliese owners do you hear greetin' into their cider and holding up fingers to show how many times there engines have produced cappuchino...they're to busy ragging them on track days. MGF's get the worst rep because there is no bonnet, the engine gets forgotten about, leaks aren't spotted, underfloor pipes corrode, people don't get rid of the air out the cooling system, from all 3 points, people use the wrong coolant, people don't check or replace the expansion tank cap, the inlet manifold gasket leaks, causing some steam and its OMFGOMFGHGF ALL ROVERS ARE SHITE THE BRITISH CAR INDUSTRY IZ FEENISHED

 

P.S Don't even get me started on Jiggle valves

[Micrashed]

 

P.S Don't even get me started on Jiggle valves

J j j j j jer jiggle valves?

 

Granville, f f f fer fetch yer cloth...

[Pete-M]

I'd have whichever one Lotus fitted to the Elise. At least it'll be fun between breakdowns.

[stilo_active]

I'd have the 1.6 in a 25. Oh wait...

 

 

... the wife already has one. We picked it up for next to nowt as we needed a car to go away in pretty swiftly. Bought with the intention of throwing it away when we got back as we'd assumed it would have broken by then and because it came equipped with standard fit* AA badge. That was 7 months and 7,000 mechanically fault-free miles ago. It's had one fault with the central locking which was a quick fix, and, er, that's it. The wife loves it, despite the fact it's got horrible rear lights made by Pifco.

 

Oh, that's not coolant under the front either, btw 

[Albert Ross]

A 75 sourced 1.8 Turbo in a Metro van.

[phil_lihp]

Now that definitely would be interesting to drive.

[meggersdog]

 

Designed to help to prevent thermal shock & reduce HGF (head gasket failure)

http://www.ptp-ltd.co.uk/shop/285_240/1/prrt_remote_thermostat_kit.htm?

 

One of those and a multi layer gasket should do the trick.

The 1.4 Metro GTi in nightfire red for me please.

 

 

Jiggle valves eh...How many people open those brass tubes and clean the valve before putting the inlet manifold back on ? 

[Barry Cade]

 

 

One of those and a multi layer gasket should do the trick.

 

Jiggle valves eh...How many people open those brass tubes and clean the valve before putting the inlet manifold back on ? 

Nooo.. MLS is bollocks, and the best thing to do with the jiggle valves is poke them right out with a sharp thing.