Club adverts - tempted to join?

[Rhythm Thief]

Prompted by the appearance of

on another thread, which tempts me only to sell or modify my Ford Cortina (or would, if I owned one), I started thinking about club adverts. They often seem calculated - how can I put this? - to put off "normal" people who might just be up for a bit of a laugh at the occasional camping weekend among like minded folk.

My own favourite was a sticker I spotted on the back of a Series II Land Rover a few years ago. It proclaimed, in big green letters:

 

"If Your Hinges Stand Proud

You're One Of Our Crowd!

 

Now, I love Series Landys and I'm sure the Series II owners' club are a sound bunch of people, but this slogan makes them sound like the most boring bunch of rivet counters on the planet. Can anyone think of anything less likely to make them join a particular car club?

[maxpower]

yeah if the club's star prize in their raffle was a fuggin morris marina

[warren t claim]

I'd change the "H" to an "M" on my sticker if I joined that club...

[Guest]

I'd change the "H" to an "M" on my sticker if I joined that club...

 

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL.

 

Autoshite slogan - there it is.

[Cavcraft]

'Can anyone think of anything less likely to make them join a particular car club?'

 

Yep. £35.00 to join the CCC (Citroen Car Club) was enough to throw me off.

[dollywobbler]

Reliant Sabre and Scimitar Owners' Club is even more - getting on for £45 with joining fee. Mind you, I haggled more than that from the asking price and they have been bloody useful! Seem really nice, down-to-earth people too. Very refreshing.

 

I think any club that advertises in a 'we're better than XXX club' sort of way, even if it's by describing themselves as 'the true enthusiasts choice' or something like that, not keen. It still boggles the mind at how many Granada clubs there are for instance. Two Rover P6 clubs is arguably one too many given how few survivors there are now.

[Pillock]

I joined ClubGTI purely because it was £15 or summat and it saved £40-odd on my insurance. The forums turned out to be not bad but I'm not sure if they're open to non-members.

Usually the only type of club I join is free, meets at pubs, and all tend to be local for the inevitable breakdown assistance.

[CreepingJesus]

The mere thought of these anally-retentive rivet counters leaves me cold. My only question is this: in this age of interwebz, is there anything with wheels and an engine that doesn't have a club? Even a blanket one like the USSR?

[Rhythm Thief]

The hinges thing just seems such a dull thing to point out. I mean, can you imagine anyone thinking "I must have a Series II Land Rover! Their Hinges Stand Proud and what else is worth living for in this day and age?" No, me neither.

[Guest Leonard Hatred]

The hinges thing just seems such a dull thing to point out. I mean, can you imagine anyone thinking "I must have a Series II Land Rover! Their Hinges Stand Proud and what else is worth living for in this day and age?" No, me neither.

 

The hinges stand proud on all Series and Defender models though.

[dollywobbler]

The hinges thing just seems such a dull thing to point out. I mean, can you imagine anyone thinking "I must have a Series II Land Rover! Their Hinges Stand Proud and what else is worth living for in this day and age?" No, me neither.

 

The hinges stand proud on all Series and Defender models though.

 

That's because you're not being anoraky enough. The door hinges are a bit flatter from Series 3 onwards. THAT'S how anal they're being.

[scruff]

Indeed, and woe betide anyone with later hinges, rumour is they have an alternative sticker saying "If Your Hinges Sit Flat, You're A Bit Of A Twat"

[wuvvum]

This thread is making me groffle.

[richardthestag]

Indeed, and woe betide anyone with later hinges, rumour is they have an alternative sticker saying "If Your Hinges Sit Flat, You're A Bit Of A Twat........... because it is certain you have a "one life live it" sticker you Dr White honkin' jam-rag fucking spunk-bubble!"

 

fixed that

 

p.s. nowt against s3 owners

[HillmanImp]

Thats just reminded me I have not renewed my Imp Club membership.

[Rhythm Thief]

Indeed, and woe betide anyone with later hinges, rumour is they have an alternative sticker saying "If Your Hinges Sit Flat, You're A Bit Of A Twat"

 

[theorganist]

Was in the Maxi club last year and the 1100 club also.

 

They both had a very useful spares service and the magazines were interesting.

 

I never mixed socially with them though.

[boobydoo]

Had the 'displeasure' of having to entertain the Merc 'CLK Owners Club' last year at a 'do'.

What a bunch of boring old tossers they were..........

[Angrydicky]

I'm in three clubs, the A30/35 Owners Club, which has a decent spares service, a great magazine and mostly nice members but a few anal wankers. The Cambridge/Oxford Owners Club has plenty of decent members but no spares service and although the magazine is in colour it's a bit thin. I've also just joined the Southend & District Classic Car Club, simply because I've been meaning to for ages and it is only £12 a year. They're a right bunch of old fossils by all accounts.

[Stroller133]

yeah if the club's star prize in their raffle was a fuggin morris marina

 

I would be joining several times over, using different e-mail addresses.

[Justin Case]

The Horsey Horseless Appreciation Society has no membership fee, clothing with logos, club regalia or concours. Therefore all possible excuses for not joining will not hold water

[pogweasel]

yeah if the club's star prize in their raffle was a fumble with Marina from goldies boutique

 

I would be joining several times over, using different e-mail addresses.

 

SICK BEASTS.

[Stroller133]

Me and some mates were part of a local Mini club for a year or so. It was good driving in convoy to shows and meeting in a pub and having a line of Minis in the car park on a sunny sunday afternoon. Most of the other members at the time were not really car people and had no interest in any other cars. The Mini's most of them had were quite boring too, this was the late 90s and most of the Mini's were late 80s Mayfairs with a minilite alloys, a big exhaust and a K&N air filter on otherwise stock 998cc engines. There was no appreaciation of the history of the Mini, one of us had a 850 and most of them didn't realise they did engines that small. One lad had just bought a new Mini, I think a Jet Black and he proudly declared it had a MG Metro Turbo engine in it - as we were looking under the bonnett I asked him if it was complete with the Turbo, he said yes, but it was not there obviously.

[Split_Pin]

If I wanted to join a Cortina Club for the anal I wouldn't choose one with an advert that has a spelling mistake in it.

 

I am a member of 3 Vauxhall Clubs. 2 are fee paying and because of the sheer size of them they have a wealth of technical knowledge. The other is a local Vauxhall Club that is free, has lots of meets at various interesting locations and it doesnt matter what model you drive or what nick its in. There's always someone there to lend a hand too if you are stuck with anything.

 

This Sunday we are all going to Dunure Castle in Ayrshire. I'm looking forward to it!

[Negative Creep]

Still haven't bothered paying £11 to join the MR2 club. might do if only to sell it.

[Guest Leonard Hatred]

yeah if the club's star prize in their raffle was a fumble with Marina from goldies boutique

 

I would be joining several times over, using different e-mail addresses.

 

SICK BEASTS.

 

SHE'S FIT AND U KNOW IT.

[Timewaster]

Me and some mates were part of a local Mini club for a year or so. It was good driving in convoy to shows and meeting in a pub and having a line of Minis in the car park on a sunny sunday afternoon. Most of the other members at the time were not really car people and had no interest in any other cars.

 

This is almost exactly my experience with a mini club.

 

There was an older guy who had a beautiful 66 Cooper that was pretty much conkers condition. Everyone wanted to be his friend, buy him shandys at the pub meets in the hope that they could sit in his car.

He also owned a Bini, once he turned up to a club meet in it and half these wankers refused to speak to him, merely pointing at his Bini and scoffing loudly

 

Fucking UNbelievable!

 

Ford clubs are no better either. CheeRS etc etc.

[Pete-M]

I was kicked out of the local 'Land Rover Society', but in a truly karmic manner the 'Society' imploded shortly afterwards.

 

The RS owners club always managed to put me off joining by apparantly being a bunch of anally retentive fuckwits. I got bored of the number of them who told me stupid things like "Those screws holding your washer bottle are the wrong ones." etc.

 

AS is the nearest thing to a car club I'm involved with.

[Pete-M]

I was kicked out of the local 'Land Rover Society', but in a truly karmic manner the 'Society' imploded shortly afterwards.

 

I think there's a story there.

 

There is, they were unimpressed with me taking the W&P Turbo Rangie on one of their little jaunts out and not breaking or scratching it at all - amongst other things. More than one of them managed to wreck bits of their (much more suited) Landies. Mine got a bit muddy.

 

There's a video of it here. Mine's the D plate Rangie with the black'n'silver bull bars and wide arches.

[Split_Pin]

I was a member of a 4th Vauxhall Club up until last year when they managed to piss off half their members by shoving anything that wasnt a Cavalier Turbo right to the back of the stand out of sight. The year before they laid out their stand so everyone had a chance to show their car properly, no matter what it was.

 

Said club also imploded a few months later.