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Now this is an advert.


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7 minutes ago, sierraman said:

It doesn’t mention the crusty front arches or the fucked door locks? 

THE PASSAT, AS EXPECTED FOR A LUXURY VEHICLE IS SPECCED OUT WITH STANDARD FEATURES INCLUDING - FULLY FLOODED BCM, A COMPLETE SET OF KNOCKING "FIRSTLINE" BRAND SUSPENSION ARMS, THE FINEST EGR COAL ON THE MARKET, AND AN INJECTOR WIRING LOOM MADE FROM ECO-FRIENDLY BIODEGRADABLE WIRES

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11 hours ago, 2flags said:

My daughter's boyfriend sent me this. I just had to share it. Great advert, shame about the car! 😆

No description available.

 

As a Passat b5 owner, this is word for word how I would describe the experience....

Doesn't everyone arrive at work feeling exhilarated by a symphony of courage and achievement?

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You will be held in high esteem by your colleagues when they see you are one of life’s high achievers driving this iconic German Motorcar which has covered a mere 192,000 miles across its 8 owners and  2 minicab firms in Burnley. As you sit inside the sumptuous upholstery which shows a map of Africa pattern you can appreciate the German penchant for shiny black plastic and the sticky door handles where over the years the matte finish has worn away. As part of the magical build quality you will embrace the moist carpets and the unique aromatic mist that builds up in the car between October and April. An array of Magic Tree air fresheners and litres of trade disinfectant compliment the hint of cigarette smoke from the cars illustrious former owners, in the capacious luggage compartment theres is a complementary semi skimmed carton full of water for those unexpected coolant leaks. 

Please take time to browse the receipts for antifreeze and a tyre from 2008 to really get a bond with the connection the previous custodians had with this car. Our team of staff have painstakingly taken the car down to the Hand Car Wash where the staff there have, by hand caressed each panel to bring up a deep shine. As to be expected with a fine vehicle of this age there are very minor niggles such as the suspension which in my opinion add to the provenance of it being a hallmark of the quality vehicles we retail here. For a mere £99 our staff will take care of all the admin associated with a transaction to leave you to relax in our portacabin as our mechanics* check over your new car prior to purchase and carefully correspond with the DVLA to ensure your transaction is seemless. 

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