Most stupid message while flogging a shiter

[Dave_Q]

I've still got a grand here for this Cortina but now I need it bringing to Wetherby services, not Scotch Corner

[stripped fred]

I can do £1.5k 2nite if you can drop off at Leicester Forest East. Will meet u outside greggs...👍🏻

[New POD]

Just now, stripped fred said:

I can do £1.5k 2nite if you can drop off at Leicester Forest East. Will meet u outside greggs...👍🏻

And how will I get home ? 

[stripped fred]

1 minute ago, New POD said:

And how will I get home ? 

I'm on about the cortina...

[artdjones]

2 hours ago, Datsuncog said:

In fairness, I've exchanged vehicles for a bottle of wine in the past...

They weren't necessarily very good vehicles, but still. No cash component.

A half bottle of Blue Nun?

[Split_Pin]

"Tell you what. I'll drive it to your bit, GIVE you the car, and get the bus back".

I've used that a few times because sometimes, being sarcastic is the only option left with these people.

[Datsuncog]

48 minutes ago, artdjones said:

A half bottle of Blue Nun?

Heh, quite a nice Rioja as it happens.

Even better, the wine was coming my way; I'd offered this shagged Laguna out to a shiter for free, as it was so ropey I couldn't bring myself to ask actual cash money for it.

The 2.0 engine was still A1 though - the new owner's plan was to transplant it into a Renault 11. Don't know if that ever happened, in the end. Sounds like it could have been fun.

[artdjones]

41 minutes ago, Datsuncog said:

Heh, quite a nice Rioja as it happens.

Even better, the wine was coming my way; I'd offered this shagged Laguna out to a shiter for free, as it was so ropey I couldn't bring myself to ask actual cash money for it.

The 2.0 engine was still A1 though - the new owner's plan was to transplant it into a Renault 11. Don't know if that ever happened, in the end. Sounds like it could have been fun.

I know you were unlucky, but a mark 1 Laguna is a really nice traditional French car.

[sierraman]

1 hour ago, Split_Pin said:

"Tell you what. I'll drive it to your bit, GIVE you the car, and get the bus back".

I've used that a few times because sometimes, being sarcastic is the only option left with these people.

I’d love to string some absolute mug on with that. ‘I’ll brim tank for you as well!’

[Datsuncog]

33 minutes ago, artdjones said:

I know you were unlucky, but a mark 1 Laguna is a really nice traditional French car.

Oh, it is - I thoroughly enjoyed both of mine, despite the less-than-ideal way my ownership ended.

I drove the silver RN for three years, and it was tremendous - rock solid and very reliable. I would happily jump into it and head down to Dublin without a moment's hesitation.  Nicely capable big thing.

I only bought the green RT Sport because it was rather less cosmetically challenged than the RN, and I felt it was a good long-term prospect as a one-owner car that had (apparently) been looked after. But it quickly developed all sorts of niggling faults - nothing major, but enough to cause spousal disapproval.

I never did find out what broke on the RT's engine, or where all the oil escaped from, but I suspect something in the upper cam broke under motorway acceleration, and caused catastrophic damage. I did find quite a bit of rust on the underside that had gone into holes, though. 

The ropey 2.0 RT Sport (also in Fiji Green) that I ultimately swapped for a bottle of rioja was bought from a neighbour for £50, mainly for the towbar.

Only later did I find out it had been accident repaired to a not-very-good standard - replacement wings had rotted out, the arse end was full of wob, and the towbar brackets turned out to be mashed and unsuitable to swap onto the silver RN. I did manage to pull off a few other useful bits to swap over, so felt I'd had my money's worth.

I'd certainly have another - one day - but they've become very thin on the ground over the past four years...

 

(I know HML isn't exactly infallible, but they used to be common enough locally and I haven't seen a Mk1 Lag on the road for a couple of years now...)

[Rod/b]

3 hours ago, artdjones said:

A half bottle of Blue Nun?

My Mrs acquired a Lada Riva estate in exchange for a small bottle of Bacardi. 

[artdjones]

1 hour ago, Datsuncog said:

Oh, it is - I thoroughly enjoyed both of mine, despite the less-than-ideal way my ownership ended.

I drove the silver RN for three years, and it was tremendous - rock solid and very reliable. I would happily jump into it and head down to Dublin without a moment's hesitation.  Nicely capable big thing.

I only bought the green RT Sport because it was rather less cosmetically challenged than the RN, and I felt it was a good long-term prospect as a one-owner car that had (apparently) been looked after. But it quickly developed all sorts of niggling faults - nothing major, but enough to cause spousal disapproval.

I never did find out what broke on the RT's engine, or where all the oil escaped from, but I suspect something in the upper cam broke under motorway acceleration, and caused catastrophic damage. I did find quite a bit of rust on the underside that had gone into holes, though. 

The ropey 2.0 RT Sport (also in Fiji Green) that I ultimately swapped for a bottle of rioja was bought from a neighbour for £50, mainly for the towbar.

Only later did I find out it had been accident repaired to a not-very-good standard - replacement wings had rotted out, the arse end was full of wob, and the towbar brackets turned out to be mashed and unsuitable to swap onto the silver RN. I did manage to pull off a few other useful bits to swap over, so felt I'd had my money's worth.

I'd certainly have another - one day - but they've become very thin on the ground over the past four years...

 

(I know HML isn't exactly infallible, but they used to be common enough locally and I haven't seen a Mk1 Lag on the road for a couple of years now...)

My brother ran a 1.8RN in Spain for about 16 years. Such a relaxing car to drive.

[artdjones]

I do see the odd one still on the road in West Cork.

1 hour ago, Datsuncog said:

Oh, it is - I thoroughly enjoyed both of mine, despite the less-than-ideal way my ownership ended.

I drove the silver RN for three years, and it was tremendous - rock solid and very reliable. I would happily jump into it and head down to Dublin without a moment's hesitation.  Nicely capable big thing.

I only bought the green RT Sport because it was rather less cosmetically challenged than the RN, and I felt it was a good long-term prospect as a one-owner car that had (apparently) been looked after. But it quickly developed all sorts of niggling faults - nothing major, but enough to cause spousal disapproval.

I never did find out what broke on the RT's engine, or where all the oil escaped from, but I suspect something in the upper cam broke under motorway acceleration, and caused catastrophic damage. I did find quite a bit of rust on the underside that had gone into holes, though. 

The ropey 2.0 RT Sport (also in Fiji Green) that I ultimately swapped for a bottle of rioja was bought from a neighbour for £50, mainly for the towbar.

Only later did I find out it had been accident repaired to a not-very-good standard - replacement wings had rotted out, the arse end was full of wob, and the towbar brackets turned out to be mashed and unsuitable to swap onto the silver RN. I did manage to pull off a few other useful bits to swap over, so felt I'd had my money's worth.

I'd certainly have another - one day - but they've become very thin on the ground over the past four years...

 

(I know HML isn't exactly infallible, but they used to be common enough locally and I haven't seen a Mk1 Lag on the road for a couple of years now...)

I still see the odd one on the road in West Cork. Usually 1.9 DTis.

[RoverFolkUs]

I didn't realize car and classic was full of so many throbbers! 

[Chris2cv]

7 hours ago, Rod/b said:

My Mrs acquired a Lada Riva estate in exchange for a small bottle of Bacardi. 

I once swapped a bottle of Jack Daniels for a moped! It wasn't a good moped admittedly, but it lasted for three years and I sold it for £150! Although it cost me a fair bit to keep it going that long.

[Spiny Norman]

Back in my college days a mate turned up in a Mk3 Cortina he'd acquired for 20 Kensitas Club and a fish supper. 

[St.Jude]

10 hours ago, Datsuncog said:

Heh, quite a nice Rioja as it happens.

Even better, the wine was coming my way; I'd offered this shagged Laguna out to a shiter for free, as it was so ropey I couldn't bring myself to ask actual cash money for it.

The 2.0 engine was still A1 though - the new owner's plan was to transplant it into a Renault 11. Don't know if that ever happened, in the end. Sounds like it could have been fun.

I get bought bottles of whiskey at christmas, and I may drink one or two during the year so I end up having a stockpile. Those bottles then get given to people in return for work or items.

It really is a sophisticated way to do business.

[Datsuncog]

The way things are headed, I'd say having experience of the barter economy could be a bit of a plus in the coming year or two...

Anyone fancy swapping some petrol for a few bottles of delicious home made peapod wine?

[Rod/b]

4 hours ago, Chris2cv said:

I once swapped a bottle of Jack Daniels for a moped! It wasn't a good moped admittedly, but it lasted for three years and I sold it for £150! Although it cost me a fair bit to keep it going that long.

This wasn’t a good Lada Riva either. She and some friends acquired it for a banger rally back in the 2000s, and it was in a bad way. We threw some brakes on it and adjusted some of the play out the steering but it was still awful. 

[GrumpiusMaximus]

1 hour ago, Rod/b said:

This wasn’t a good Lada Riva either. She and some friends acquired it for a banger rally back in the 2000s, and it was in a bad way. We threw some brakes on it and adjusted some of the play out the steering but it was still awful exactly the same as it was out of the factory.

FTFY.

[GMcD]

20 hours ago, Kiltox said:

Maybe he wants to put one of these amazing* private plates on it?

 

W555 NKR indeed. 

His detailed photo library always seems to be amazing at missing the important stuff. Jaunty angles and shadows to hide arch and sill rust or mega paint bubbles. Or the close up shots have the scab just a smidge out of sight. 

I'm sure this cunt has phoenixed his business before too, once upon a time ago. 

 

[Snake Charmer]

On 6/12/2022 at 11:18 PM, DodgyBastard said:

Best price???

"Best we don't waste our time." 👍

 

My most memorable comment after the barage of questions repeating the advert, I asked if he was happy with the price as I wasn't taking offers;

"We will see about that when I get there."

 

[Unlucky Alf]

On 6/17/2022 at 3:50 PM, Datsuncog said:

Oh, it is - I thoroughly enjoyed both of mine, despite the less-than-ideal way my ownership ended.

I drove the silver RN for three years, and it was tremendous - rock solid and very reliable. I would happily jump into it and head down to Dublin without a moment's hesitation.  Nicely capable big thing.

I only bought the green RT Sport because it was rather less cosmetically challenged than the RN, and I felt it was a good long-term prospect as a one-owner car that had (apparently) been looked after. But it quickly developed all sorts of niggling faults - nothing major, but enough to cause spousal disapproval.

I never did find out what broke on the RT's engine, or where all the oil escaped from, but I suspect something in the upper cam broke under motorway acceleration, and caused catastrophic damage. I did find quite a bit of rust on the underside that had gone into holes, though. 

The ropey 2.0 RT Sport (also in Fiji Green) that I ultimately swapped for a bottle of rioja was bought from a neighbour for £50, mainly for the towbar.

Only later did I find out it had been accident repaired to a not-very-good standard - replacement wings had rotted out, the arse end was full of wob, and the towbar brackets turned out to be mashed and unsuitable to swap onto the silver RN. I did manage to pull off a few other useful bits to swap over, so felt I'd had my money's worth.

I'd certainly have another - one day - but they've become very thin on the ground over the past four years...

 

(I know HML isn't exactly infallible, but they used to be common enough locally and I haven't seen a Mk1 Lag on the road for a couple of years now...)

I had a 2.0RTi Sport from new, it was lovely.  Company car, first non Ford I had had, after a string of Fiesta/escort/mondeo’s.  I loved the comfy drive and was impressed that it showed the oil level on the dashboard briefly, when you started it up.

Then I realised it drank oil…I often wondered if that was why Renault fitted the oil level indicator on the dash.  I had to fund the oil myself as it wasn’t included in the leasing company deal our company had.   
It wasn’t a lucky car for me… we got road raged on holiday in it a week after we got it in Norfolk (Still no idea what I supposedly did…) and then I was driven into on a roundabout in Bracknell.   To cap it all, it was the only car I have been driven into the back of…..when I wasn’t actually inside the car.  ( I pulled over to clean my screen as my wipers had froze up  and some wazzuck with a totally frozen uncleared windscreen screen drove into the back of my car like it wasn’t there as I shouted STOP!  While I was standing along side it.  The repair was shite and rust started to come through the panels, but I left the company and some other poor sod ended up with it.

I loved the look of the Mk1 Laguna, styling of the bonnet and the rear lights are perfect.

[Dj_efk]

Not flogging a car but thought this defo belongs here:

[camryv6]

On 6/18/2022 at 1:09 AM, Datsuncog said:

The way things are headed, I'd say having experience of the barter economy could be a bit of a plus in the coming year or two...

Anyone fancy swapping some petrol for a few bottles of delicious home made peapod wine?

More like swap your house for a couple of Litres of petrol lol

[DirtyDaily]

Just a couple from my time selling a taxi spec e class merc on Facebook marketplace. I got £1400 in the end.

[Datsuncog]

1 hour ago, Dj_efk said:

"It looks like someone has given them a coat of paint not too long ago so that suggests they are good."

Yeah, I understand the same logic applies equally well to Discovery chassis mounting points and high-pressure fuel pumps on Laguna IIs.

Nothing untoward here - can't you see the recent paint?

[wuvvum]

2 hours ago, Dj_efk said:

Not flogging a car but thought this defo belongs here:

I don't think that's a stupid question.  I mean I know it's been answered in the ad, but if something is as simple to test as finding a car battery and running two wires from it to the terminals, it does make one wonder why that hasn't been attempted.

[The_Equalizer]

On 6/13/2022 at 11:48 AM, Datsuncog said:

Buying cars in GB from NI was a pain in the arse before mobile banking came along. You'd have to inform your bank in advance that you wanted to make a withdrawal in Bank of England notes, not the assorted Nordie selection of First Trust/ Ulster Bank/ Bank of Ireland/ Northern Bank notes that normally pop out of the ATMs here.

Once Northern Bank rebranded as Danske Bank after its takeover, that was game over - while you may have managed to persuade a shopkeeper in England to take an Ulster Bank note, having to explain why your fiver isn't actually Danish was a bridge too far.

When I went over to Glasgow in 2008 (to buy a Cortina estate, coincidentally) I had £1,500 in BoE £50 notes in my inside pocket. I felt well dodgy, and also paranoid about somehow losing the envelope full of cash.

I should maybe mention that the car was up for sale at £1,500, but the seller had admitted that 'the pics do flatter it' and 'there's a bit of rust starting', and as such he'd be flexible on price.

But the thought of starting all that 'best price' bollocks before even viewing it never entered my head. Hence bringing the full asking price with me, with the intention of basing any offers on the actual condition.

From the ad pics and the couple of emails we'd exchanged about suitable viewing times, the seller seemed genuine and I was about 80% sure I'd buy it - 100% if it was really as described - so booked a one-way plane ticket and he picked me up in it from the bus station in Sauchiehall St. He admitted that he didn't think I'd actually turn up.

Car drove ok, and there was indeed a bit of scab and bubbling around the lower quarters. The seller volunteered that he'd accept £1,000, and that suited me just fine. Shook on it, counted out the cash, then drove from Cambuslang to Troon without trouble and got the ferry back to Larne.

More recently though, any car purchases have been done by bank transfer. So much easier for everyone, even if there's always that terrifying moment after you've hit 'transfer' but before the seller gets the notification...

For what is worth Halifax will dish out Bank of England notes with a little notice. I do still enjoy the buzz of buying with them. 

I once sold a Jag Mk2 to a very nice German couple who flew over with a bag of tools (just in case), a bottle of German wine (nice touch) and £16k in cash.  

 

[Datsuncog]

Funny enough, the Halifax was where I got the notes to buy the Cortina - at the main branch in central Belfast.

They did give them to me, after 48hrs notice, but the cashier grumped and groaned rather unnecessarily the whole time.

Still - that was 14 years ago, I'm horrified to realise, so they've probably improved their customer service since!