Most stupid message while flogging a shiter

[wuvvum]

How much did you have it up for?  I love the fact that even at a presumably comically low asking price, someone is still trying to offer less...

[Dave_Q]

Nobody wants them old escorts mate, you'll probably have to pay to have it taken away.

I'll give you 100 as a favour like but I really am cutting my own throat there, probably make a loss on weighing it in because it'll be so rotten

[steveo3002]

44 minutes ago, wuvvum said:

How much did you have it up for?  I love the fact that even at a presumably comically low asking price, someone is still trying to offer less...

some just cant help it...if you had the biggest bargain ever up for sale some chomp has to still try and knock you

[sierraman]

I’m almost tempted to put up an advert on Freecycle again. 

[Matty]

Bought a new car this week and needed to shift my old mk4 golf quick. Car take back 260 quid entire transaction took one 5 min phone call. Not worth selling cheap cars anymore

[Dave_Q]

1 hour ago, Matty said:

Bought a new car this week and needed to shift my old mk4 golf quick. Car take back 260 quid entire transaction took one 5 min phone call. Not worth selling cheap cars anymore

Ah the Sierraman method. TBF I have used cartakeback before, got about £300 for a slightly broken Citroen C8 which I probably could have advertised for maybe £500 if I was truthful about the condition which obviously would have got the usual selection of 2 bob botty rockets (© @Cavcraft) offering me god knows what.

I also wished I had used CTB when selling my wife's old 147, it had "old diesel syndrome" of something not being quite right and being down on power with no error code but drove OK with the MAF disconnected. I decribed it exactly thus and got about £300 for it in the end from some bloke from Kent of all places but he was up here on a job or something. 

He text me a couple of weeks later complaining that it was broken in exactly the way I said it was, apparently his garage had told him the turbo was "on the way out" and it needed £500 spending on it, he was after a partial refiund and threatening to report me to trading standards.

I told him the car was described accurately and if he wanted a warranty he needed to buy a £3000 car not a £300 one. Surprisingly* I never got a knock from trading standards but it put me even further off actually selling cheap cars to the public.

Anything under a grand attracts total vermin for the most part, people who haven't even got £100 to give you but might be able to scrape together £300 on giro day if they manage to get all their tick in.

On that Alfa I think CTB was about £200 at the time and I probably should have taken it.

[Matty]

20 minutes ago, Dave_Q said:

Ah the Sierraman method. TBF I have used cartakeback before, got about £300 for a slightly broken Citroen C8 which I probably could have advertised for maybe £500 if I was truthful about the condition which obviously would have got the usual selection of 2 bob botty rockets (© @Cavcraft) offering me god knows what.

I also wished I had used CTB when selling my wife's old 147, it had "old diesel syndrome" of something not being quite right and being down on power with no error code but drove OK with the MAF disconnected. I decribed it exactly thus and got about £300 for it in the end from some bloke from Kent of all places but he was up here on a job or something. 

He text me a couple of weeks later complaining that it was broken in exactly the way I said it was, apparently his garage had told him the turbo was "on the way out" and it needed £500 spending on it, he was after a partial refiund and threatening to report me to trading standards.

I told him the car was described accurately and if he wanted a warranty he needed to buy a £3000 car not a £300 one. Surprisingly* I never got a knock from trading standards but it put me even further off actually selling cheap cars to the public.

Anything under a grand attracts total vermin for the most part, people who haven't even got £100 to give you but might be able to scrape together £300 on giro day if they manage to get all their tick in.

On that Alfa I think CTB was about £200 at the time and I probably should have taken it.

True all of this. The car deserved to live but I haven't the energy to match make

[artdjones]

A lad I know advertised his Seat Leon for sale in the Irish equivalent of Exchange and Mart. It was a 99 and at the time was about 6 years old. He wanted 4500 for it but the listing magazine mistakenly put it in at 1500, that is about ⅓ of its value. Amazingly, people still tried to haggle.

[Hogie]

16 minutes ago, artdjones said:

A lad I know advertised his Seat Leon for sale in the Irish equivalent of Exchange and Mart. It was a 99 and at the time was about 6 years old. He wanted 4500 for it but the listing magazine mistakenly put it in at 1500, that is about ⅓ of its value. Amazingly, people still tried to haggle.

The buy and sell Id imagine, no photos but every single car advert with the words "Mint Condition" written at some point.  

I can remember going to view a Honda Accord described as such......thankfully we didnt travel far to see it as there wasnt  a straight panel on the car. 

[DodgyBastard]

11 hours ago, wuvvum said:

How much did you have it up for?  I love the fact that even at a presumably comically low asking price, someone is still trying to offer less...

I did actually have it up for £800 but have had a few offers of £500 or less, it seems like everyone really wants to be my m8 for some bizarre reason. I've had around 40 messages so far but have only replied to a couple of them with ridiculous answers. Basically all of the ones trying to be my best mate.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

3

[bangernomics]

The buy and sell Id imagine, no photos but every single car advert with the words "Mint Condition" written at some point.  
I can remember going to view a Honda Accord described as such......thankfully we didnt travel far to see it as there wasnt  a straight panel on the car. 

The old gag as mint as a polo and they’re full of holes too.

[sierraman]

Right. After having had my time wasted by the hundred people that were wanting the kids toys I’d listed on Freecycle, not turning up or just generally not following things up I’m going to list this imaginary Mk4 XR3i that’s in this imaginary garage of this imaginary house I’ve just bought to do up. Should be entertaining to see what idiots come out to help me out by shifting this Escort that’s in my way. 

[MOD500]

I had the travel sob story once when I was selling a bicycle. The guy seemed happy about the bike, but the fact that he had paid for a return train fare to come to my house had become an issue that I had to resolve. He was told that the price remained the same whether he bought it or not, so he phoned a friend before handing over the money. It must have been a tough day for him.

 

 

[Eyersey1234]

14 hours ago, sierraman said:

Right. After having had my time wasted by the hundred people that were wanting the kids toys I’d listed on Freecycle, not turning up or just generally not following things up I’m going to list this imaginary Mk4 XR3i that’s in this imaginary garage of this imaginary house I’ve just bought to do up. Should be entertaining to see what idiots come out to help me out by shifting this Escort that’s in my way. 

Could I make an imaginary appointment to view the imaginary XR3i? 

[sierraman]

1 minute ago, Eyersey1234 said:

Could I make an imaginary appointment to view the imaginary XR3i? 

Sorry mate, some guys came this morning and took it away but I got £50 I didn’t even ask for from them! What a set of blokes! I was that chuffed I chucked in the couple of new old stock uncracked Sierra Cosworth Dash tops and a 205 block Pinto in. 

No sign of the Freecycle ad being approved yet, still waiting! 

[Eyersey1234]

11 minutes ago, sierraman said:

Sorry mate, some guys came this morning and took it away but I got £50 I didn’t even ask for from them! What a set of blokes! I was that chuffed I chucked in the couple of new old stock uncracked Sierra Cosworth Dash tops and a 205 block Pinto in. 

No sign of the Freecycle ad being approved yet, still waiting! 

Aaw I was going to offer an imaginary £3000 for it 😂

[Cord Fourteener]

14 hours ago, sierraman said:

Right. After having had my time wasted by the hundred people that were wanting the kids toys I’d listed on Freecycle, not turning up or just generally not following things up I’m going to list this imaginary Mk4 XR3i that’s in this imaginary garage of this imaginary house I’ve just bought to do up. Should be entertaining to see what idiots come out to help me out by shifting this Escort that’s in my way. 

OK, there's a second one you want to sell for £10.

Allow me to distract you asking every question and you giving me detailed honest answers, but also taking hours out of your day doing this, then making specific, detailed and definitive plans to turn up the next day.

It's now the next day, half an hour before I'm meant to turn up. 

Sorry mate, I can't get a lift/ just bought something closer to me/recommissioned my Corsa SRi. 

[Cord Fourteener]

Me on facefook: car for sale £350.

Some Brainless Moron: 'Best price'

Me: (scratches head, wonders if that's a sentence, a question or a case of tourettes. Plays game) 'what do you mean?'

SBM: 'what's your best price'

Me: 'why don't you consider what is worth and make me an offer?'

SBM:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

(Tumbleweed)

[dome]

10 minutes ago, Cord Forteener aka Tim_E said:

Me on facefook: car for sale £350.

Some Brainless Moron: 'Best price'

Me: (scratches head, wonders if that's a sentence, a question or a case of tourettes. Plays game) 'what do you mean?'

SBM: 'what's your best price'

Me: 'why don't you consider what is worth and make me an offer?'

SBM:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

(Tumbleweed)

My usual answer to "what's your best price" is "the full asking price, clearly"

[sierraman]

10 minutes ago, Cord Forteener aka Tim_E said:

Me on facefook: car for sale £350.

Some Brainless Moron: 'Best price'

Me: (scratches head, wonders if that's a sentence, a question or a case of tourettes. Plays game) 'what do you mean?'

SBM: 'what's your best price'

Me: 'why don't you consider what is worth and make me an offer?'

SBM:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

(Tumbleweed)

Why put yourself through having these people on your premises? Ring up the nice man at the scrapyard, wait for him to come and collect a cheque for a couple of hundred quid. 

[JMotor]

Sold my 406 yesterday.

With no hassle. Lad a couple of sheds down from me wanted it.

£200 cash paid, with wheels and battery staying with me. 

Not often that happens! 

Got another couple of cars to bin. So high chance of doing what Sierraman has said above. Just can not be bothered selling stuff at the bottom end of the market. Specially when cars are at the frag feed stage.

[Eyersey1234]

48 minutes ago, sierraman said:

Sorry mate, some guys came this morning and took it away but I got £50 I didn’t even ask for from them! What a set of blokes! I was that chuffed I chucked in the couple of new old stock uncracked Sierra Cosworth Dash tops and a 205 block Pinto in. 

No sign of the Freecycle ad being approved yet, still waiting! 

Did you give them an imaginary warranty? 

[sierraman]

18 minutes ago, Eyersey1234 said:

Did you give them an imaginary warranty? 

Of course! My famous 3 year no quibble return policy.

[Talbot]

44 minutes ago, Eyersey1234 said:

Did you give them an imaginary warranty? 

Presumably this car could have a genuine tail-lamp warranty (IE, as long as the tail-lamps are still visible to the seller, the car is in warranty).

[SRi05]

54 minutes ago, sierraman said:

Why put yourself through having these people on your premises? Ring up the nice man at the scrapyard, wait for him to come and collect a cheque for a couple of hundred quid. 

This.  Anything under 500 - - - > bin.  Fuck dealing with the type of scrotums wanting a discount on a £300 car 

[Cord Fourteener]

4 hours ago, dome said:

My usual answer to "what's your best price" is "the full asking price, clearly"

My asking price: £500

Interested party: Best price M9

Me: My best price? Maybe £1000. Better for me than £500

[catsinthewelder]

On this basis I should probably just scrap the Bollox Rover 220 that I'm never going to get around to fixing 😔

[Cord Fourteener]

47 minutes ago, catsinthewelder said:

On this basis I should probably just scrap the Bollox Rover 220 that I'm never going to get around to fixing 😔

Nooooo! They're starting to increase in value anyway. 

[Timewaster]

6 hours ago, SRi05 said:

This.  Anything under 500 - - - > bin.  Fuck dealing with the type of scrotums wanting a discount on a £300 car 

100% this, once you have offered it here first of course.

[Andyrew]

59 minutes ago, catsinthewelder said:

On this basis I should probably just ROFFLE the Bollox Rover 220 that I'm never going to get around to fixing 😔

Ftfy