The grumpy thread

[dollywobbler]

I'm probably going to get abused for this, but I've never understood why anyone would want to drink 7 or 8 pints of ANYTHING at one sitting!! Put it all in one container at the start of an evening and think about why the hell you'd want to down all that in the next few hours!! There's nothing on earth I enjoy enough to want to consume in that sort of quantity!!

No abuse here. I've never understood why people think it's acceptable to constantly drink themselves into a stupor. How is it cool to be so pissed that you have to puke? A few drinks then yes, I can see the appeal (though I don't actually drink at all!) but this desire to get obliterated is just absolutely beyond me.

[Pillock]

So he has one pint and a shot and all of a sudden he's Mohammed Fucking Ali and starts gobbing off, throwing his weight round and knocking into people looking for a fight, believing his fellow workers will a) think he's the coolest kid around and come and help him when he gets his inevitable twatting before the end of the night.

Tell me, when did you start working with me? It must have been over 12 months ago, because that's a 100% accurate description of last years Christmas party.It was even his 'mates' that he was trying to fight with.I'm doing this years party, partly against my better judgement but partly because I've inspected the list of names attending and it seems to be an ok bunch. I've also been promised a kebab for letting a mate crash at my place.

[Cavcraft]

I do drink a fair amount but don't try and drink more and more each week, know when to stop and never, ever cause trouble because I'm pissed.I do get pissed and I do enjoy it, wouldn't dream of denying it but (as mad as it sounds) it's a social thing with likeminded people, and we always have a bloody good laugh without fail.Can't drink at home because it just doesn't appeal and I don't like the idea of drinking in front of the kids to be honest.

[Rusty Pelican]

I buy a bottle of JD at the beginning of Christmas , usually lasts a year and maybe a couple of pints of Guinness a month , not exactly a 7 pints a night drinker , oh and I HATE being even remotely pissed ,

[whitevanman]

I absolutely fucking detest amateur drinkers, there should be a law that these wankers who only go out twice a year (Christmas and New Year) should be forced to drink in pubs that us regular drinkers don't use. Maybe some sort of nursery type pub to gradually introduce them to ale until they can drink seven or eight pints at least and not want to fight the world?

Billy for Prime minister damn do those plebs piss me off...and we get it in the summer as well at various "Gala" days around each and every town for a 36 mile radius............pure torture

[whitevanman]

I'm probably going to get abused for this, but I've never understood why anyone would want to drink 7 or 8 pints of ANYTHING at one sitting!! Put it all in one container at the start of an evening and think about why the hell you'd want to down all that in the next few hours!! There's nothing on earth I enjoy enough to want to consume in that sort of quantity!!

No abuse here. I've never understood why people think it's acceptable to constantly drink themselves into a stupor. How is it cool to be so pissed that you have to puke? A few drinks then yes, I can see the appeal (though I don't actually drink at all!) but this desire to get obliterated is just absolutely beyond me.

define a "FEW"...I agree that going out a getting shit faced every night or all weekend is not overly apealing to me any more, but personally I can drink 7 or 8 pints and barely be any different to normal.....does this make me a bad person? I have a couple of drinks most nights as I find the company at my local to be very enjoyable and a good way to unwind after the stresses of the day but I dont have 7 or 8 pints a day any more than about twice a year and usually its based around a car show with mates I dont get to see often

[ChinaTom]

Having done both the Russian (Well, Ukraine and Belarus anyway) and Chinese styles of business for the last 10 years I have found that my decreasing ability to deal with hangovers as I get older has now more or less stopped me drinking at all. I was in Morrissons to buy 15 cans of Strongbow for £5 less than 10 minutes after the ad came on the telly. This was in October, there are still 9 cans in the case and I mix OJ with Sprite for my evening tipple like a prize wuss. Right, here's who's thumped my goat right on the chin and stamped on its bollocks when it was down today.UK Borders Agency. I can deal with the pedantic miserable early shift rudeness at Terminal 3 (it's like on the telly, but what they don't show is the muttered undecipherable accents and dialects even the British can't understand) - they have a job to do - bouncers on the door and all that. I cope with it.But, after issuing 13 previous visas for Mrs CT - that latter as a Spouse Visa, they threaten to refuse her an extension due to lack of evidence that she exists. They want her to produce "official" correspondence to prove that she's here. OK, the fact that she handed you her passport in Croydon and also went all the way to Sheffield with 5 hours notice to do her Biometrics a week later isn't enough? {tolerate - just call them to see what constitutes evidence}.Any of these will do: Letters from the Benefits Office. We don't claim benefits of any sort, and anyway her immigration status denies her the right to claim them anyway!!!!! What else?Letters from Revenue and Customs. She can't pay tax if she's not allowed to work 'cos her visa states she can't work!!!!!! What else?Letters from NHS following treatment for something. She's fit and healthy and she's covered on our private health insurance anyway - will a letter from them do? No. Has to be NHS. What else?Police report - from any cautions, arrests, traffic offences. Despite having the temper of a hormonal grizzly with a migraine, she's as good as gold - never been in trouble, or had need to report any.Thems all we can accept Sir.So, unless we can come up with no less than 6 SIX examples of such correspondence by the 15th December, they are going to boot my wife out the country and refuse her future entry as the application time for an extension is counted as overstay if not approved. This is, and I'm sure you will all empathise with me here, utterly annoying. Losing faith in this Island. Certainly seems like marriage counts for bugger all in today's society.There will be more OJ than Sprite in my glass tonight that's for sure.

[Cavcraft]

Good luck Tom.It's sad to hear of your wife's plight, especially when you see some of the pondlife who were born over here who seem to grab every benefit going and not give a flying one.If we could replace them with people like your missus the country would be a far better place.

[Timewaster]

Jeez - even for this country thats ridiculous! It happens at all levels. My girlfriend sold her house a few months ago and moved in with me. The number of times we have hit a brick wall because her name doesn't appear on any "utility bill" it is almost impossible to prove she lives here.If she didn't have a driving licence, we'd be screwed. Even her bank statements are online, so nothing on paper.Sometimes I think the ID card thing wouldn't be such a bad idea, and I hate that idea!

[myglaren]

That is absolutely despicable treatment CT.

 

Surely the Borders Agency have access to online information pertaining to your wife's residency here to verify her right to stay.

Just the fact that you are married should carry enough weight on its own.

[ChinaTom]

Cheers for the comments - I am gripping onto some hope that common sense will prevail. Sure, they have plenty of records of her history, but my guess is the department is staffed with "trained personnel", not people with a genuine desire to weed out those with criminal or dishonest intent and "process" the genuine ones. My old school mate works in a fairly senior position in the Passport Office and he moans about the staff and the training they get. Hang your brain up at the door - apply the law of averages and try not to get through that pile too quickly, or the Guv'nor will cut the department budget again. Unfortunately Passport Office and Visa Office and totally separate and don't interact.We're not at the end of the road yet, there is always that possibility of common sense, and appeal, and finally Canada, who seem to have retained their Immigration quality - hard but fair; and this suits us fine as we are decent folk with no skeletons in cupboards or stuff we'd rather like to hide. Chin up I guess. I'm working on ways to get her arrested, alternatively if I push her down the stairs, she'll need treatment. Do each 3 times and we should be home and dry. Once she fully recovers we can down the benefits office claiming for the 13 kids we might have.

[Cavcraft]

If you don't mind me saying Tom one plus is that it makes a mockery of the gutter press/far right types who think everyone who comes to live here is a scrounger or criminal.Of course I don't mean to detract from the appalling situation you wife and you are in.

[AlsoMike]

Lincoln Christmas Market. Give me strength. Unfortunately I live close enough to this gargantuan faux-german monstrosity for my street to be 'closed' and I need to have a resident 'pass' in my windscreen to park outside and drive up to my own house. It doesn't stop shedloads of twunts cramming their bloody Vectras up my street all day and making parking impossible though does it. Yes, I know the market was there before I moved here and yes I should just be happy that it's only one weekend per year, but I'm not.

[M'coli]

It doesn't stop shedloads of twunts cramming their bloody Vectras up my street all day and making parking impossible though does it.

Come, now, don't give them credit for being able to "cram" cars in for parking - I believe that due to cars having power steering and parking sensors that the gap required at each end of a car is 3 times what it used to be.

[Cavcraft]

Ah bollocks, I've thought about it a bit more and it's making me even madder:New Years Eve:Here's a novel idea: get a load of works party types, amateur drinkers and gobshites. Charge £6.00 to get in shit pub they'd have to pay me to go in and which is normally empty.Put drink prices up x a cajillion, install bouncers every three inches. Cram pub to rafters with dickheads, watch someone spill someone's drink by accident then sit back and enjoy World War 3 with aforementioned office hardman wannabes.Two hours waiting for a taxi, seats are wet and smell of sick. £257,219 for the two mile journey home trying not to call for Huey yourself due to smell in taxi.Or walk home attempting to avoid knobheads lying in the middle of the road, wankers asking you for a smoke and some fucking moron spoiling for fight because you saw his charming girlfriend/wife/bit on the side relieving herself on the pavement.One night of the year where staying in seems absolute bastarding bliss.

[Mike D]

I hate christmas and new year. They can both poke it.

[Pete-M]

Someone was trying to get me butt-fucked in court this week. I am less than impressed. Especially as this person was someone I counted as a friend, and who repeatedly told me I was the only person they trusted.Just to make things even more surreal, this person was given the option of telling the truth or digging a huge hole for themselves (by trying to land me in the shit) and they chose to dig the hole. Even after it was explained to them that if they decided to try and screw me it simply would not work.It beggars belief. I can't go into details, but I'm gobsmacked that anyone could think that digging a huge hole for themselves in court could possibly be a good idea. Especially as the alternative is utterly painless.Still, just shows that you can never underestimate the stupidity of some people. I didn't have a problem with this person, but when you give someone an option "Tell the truth and you'll be ok, or try and dump me in the shit and open a massive legal minefield for yourself" and they choose the latter course, it kind of sours things.

[RedSparrow]

I hope it all goes ok Pete, I'm sure it will. My dad once sacked a lad for blatantly stealing from the business, after several chances. The dick took him to court for unfair dismissal, of course my dad won but it still put him through months of stress. Incredibly the little shit sent him a letter after the case asking for his job back! How fucking thick is that?!That fucking Vodaphone advert where the twat texts his mates asking for chat up lines which he reads to a girl from his phone. What a load of shit - as if reading a line from your phone to a lady is going to work / impress them / not make them think you are a wanker.

[Mr_Bo11ox]

Did you ask why TF he bid on it then?

[Polystratus]

Lincoln Christmas Market. Give me strength. Unfortunately I live close enough to this gargantuan faux-german monstrosity for my street to be 'closed' and I need to have a resident 'pass' in my windscreen to park outside and drive up to my own house. It doesn't stop shedloads of twunts cramming their bloody Vectras up my street all day and making parking impossible though does it. Yes, I know the market was there before I moved here and yes I should just be happy that it's only one weekend per year, but I'm not.

Park and Ride is £12 per car now, I can remember when it was £3.50 (and a bit nearer too), been to it a few times but not anymore- too crowded and you can't even get near the stalls to see anything.

[AlsoMike]

Lincoln Christmas Market. Give me strength. Unfortunately I live close enough to this gargantuan faux-german monstrosity for my street to be 'closed' and I need to have a resident 'pass' in my windscreen to park outside and drive up to my own house. It doesn't stop shedloads of twunts cramming their bloody Vectras up my street all day and making parking impossible though does it. Yes, I know the market was there before I moved here and yes I should just be happy that it's only one weekend per year, but I'm not.

Park and Ride is £12 per car now, I can remember when it was £3.50 (and a bit nearer too), been to it a few times but not anymore- too crowded and you can't even get near the stalls to see anything.

£12! What the hell?! That's a funk of a lot just to wander past loads of burger vans and stalls that sell really long scarves and ugly winter hats that you'll wear once, on the day you buy it.

[Mash]

Lincoln Christmas Market. Give me strength. Unfortunately I live close enough to this gargantuan faux-german monstrosity for my street to be 'closed' and I need to have a resident 'pass' in my windscreen to park outside and drive up to my own house. It doesn't stop shedloads of twunts cramming their bloody Vectras up my street all day and making parking impossible though does it. Yes, I know the market was there before I moved here and yes I should just be happy that it's only one weekend per year, but I'm not.

Park and Ride is £12 per car now, I can remember when it was £3.50 (and a bit nearer too), been to it a few times but not anymore- too crowded and you can't even get near the stalls to see anything.

I was in Lincoln today and realised too late the bloody market was on. Luckily where I was going was not too bad to get too as I think most people had availed themselves of the Park & Ride - the showground was absolutely rammed full of cars - and all of them 12 quid each??? Jeez!

[shite_meister]

In that time I've been lucky enough to work behind the Iron Curtain, in a few minor dubious dictatorships, & around a chunk of the ''civilised'' world.

Just out of interest Mr B how the hell did you manage to work behind the I-ron Curtain? doing what for whom? I didn't think the commies would allow that sort of thing? Ah I knew it, you're ex-Stasi right?

[M'coli]

Oh well ebay will get another listing fee out of me.

Tell them the buyer eff'd up and try to get it for free - I got one on the Avenger.

[Gompo]

Gompo-your Mum reads this? Marvellous.I'm old, mate- been on this planet since Arthur burnt his cakes.In that time I've been lucky enough to work behind the Iron Curtain, in a few minor dubious dictatorships, & around a chunk of the ''civilised'' world.I tend to jump at 'opportunities' - usually spontaneously, and it does me right most of the time. Not always thoughLanguage? I tend to learn when I get there - easier from the locals. Sign language & laughter tends to work -initially. Most are rusty now-but who knows whats around the corner.

Hi Nigel,Thanks for the info.. My Mum doesnt literally read AS but I tell her anything she might find interesting so I've mentioned your massive fleet among other things and we've watched your tv appearance a few times. She of course knows that I'm in awe of your fleet and want something similar (not quite as big!) oneday. If i mention or we see an obscure car she'll usually ask whether you've got one..My rare rant for today:Why the hell do people (usually middel age women) RUN/jog to get ON a Zebra Crossing while there are cars waiting, but as soon as they're on the road/crossing they slow down to normal pace? I'm not talking about one of those crossings where cars rarely stop either, this is one in a town centre where on a Saturday morning there wont usually be enough of a gap for two cars to go through consectutively.Cheers for that, you could have continued walking at regular speed and let me go, or walked at normal pace, let me go, and ran across the crossing while the car behind me waited but no.. You're just too much of a mong. I reckon they're thinking to themselves that they're helping us too. And dont wave either.

[AXrescuer]

Just had an email to say that one of my mates is in hospital in London tonight having been hit by one of those stupid little Indian Fuk Fuk things. I never even knew they were legal in this country. Apparently, it tried to pass between a car and my mate who was on his push bike and in the process, ripped a big chunk out of his right calf. Don't what is going on down in the smoke, those fucking pedal driven rickshaw things were bad enough without having more ridiculous Asian congestion dodgers jumping in on the act.

[seth]

Just had an email to say that one of my mates is in hospital in London tonight having been hit by one of those stupid little Indian Fuk Fuk things. I never even knew they were legal in this country. Apparently, it tried to pass between a car and my mate who was on his push bike and in the process, ripped a big chunk out of his right calf. Don't what is going on down in the smoke, those fucking pedal driven rickshaw things were bad enough without having more ridiculous Asian congestion dodgers jumping in on the act.

Arse! I drove through the middle of town last night about 11.30. Commented to the friend who was with me that those pedal rickshaws are the worst thing to have happened in London in the last ten years. They generally have complete disregard for both the rules of the road and common courtesy. Total nightmare. Hope you're mate recovers OK.

[AXrescuer]

Cheers Seth,Spoke to his wife a while back, he's had surgery and is as well as can be expected. Now he's faces a shit xmas and he and the family won't be going abroad as they had hoped. Hope the Tuk Tuk driver is strung up by his bollocks.

[barrett]

much more trivial, but losing my bloody wallet. all my shit inside it (but no cash). bugger. teaches me for going on an 18 hour bender i guess....

[whitevanman]

RIGHT.................HORSES

what use are they? why do we have them? why are there owners almost enevitably arseholes? why are they so destructive? why do the owners never seem to have them next to their houses?

 

Because they are destructive walking dog food..........I've had horses put into the field next to me and they have destroyed my solar lights, my bird table, my bird feeders and are now tring to destroy the fence to get to even more of my garden than they have already eaten I'm sorely tempted to open the gate and let the nasty spitfull things loose and hope they get destryed...............

 

I HATE HORSES