The grumpy thread

[RedSparrow]

  brammy777 said:

I use those AZOR razors, cheap and they are damn good.Anyway, a customer really boiled my piss today.She wanted me to check her lottery tickets to see if theyve won and they hadnt, its normal procedure to rip them afterwards as they are valueless and you cant do anything with them.But no, she has a massive go at me for it, i apologise about a million times but she continues to moan and makes me cellotape it back together for her, which i do badly as shes still giving me an earful.Id understand if it was something you could keep and use again, but its not, it has less usage than a receipt, And she wanted to make a complaint about me. Thanks. Shops only take 10p out every pound for lottery tickets anyway, so its not as if shes an important customer.Ugh, I hate difficult customers.

Did the thick bint say why she wanted to keep it? Or was she just pleased to have something to moan about, as I suspect of many members of the public.

[sporty-shite]

  Richard said:

  pogweasel said:

Simply tell her to "GET OUT OF MY SHOP", possibly chasing her out with a yard-brush or similar.

I genuinely miss the days when that was the accepted standard of customer care.

Quite right. If I could ever find the complete and utter arse who invented the phrase "the customer is always right" I would beat him/her to within millimetres of their worthless life, with their own painfully dismembered limbs.

[brammy777]

  RedSparrow said:

  brammy777 said:

I use those AZOR razors, cheap and they are damn good.Anyway, a customer really boiled my piss today.She wanted me to check her lottery tickets to see if theyve won and they hadnt, its normal procedure to rip them afterwards as they are valueless and you cant do anything with them.But no, she has a massive go at me for it, i apologise about a million times but she continues to moan and makes me cellotape it back together for her, which i do badly as shes still giving me an earful.Id understand if it was something you could keep and use again, but its not, it has less usage than a receipt, And she wanted to make a complaint about me. Thanks. Shops only take 10p out every pound for lottery tickets anyway, so its not as if shes an important customer.Ugh, I hate difficult customers.

Did the thick bint say why she wanted to keep it? Or was she just pleased to have something to moan about, as I suspect of many members of the public.

nope didnt get a reason. Lottery is always the biggest source of bad customers for me, get over the fact you didnt win.

[AlsoMike]

  Hirst said:

I quite like the "struggling alcoholic" look

I'm cultivating this look at the moment, my beard is going well and I find that when teamed with a rough looking beanie hat people move out of my way much more quickly than they used to.

[Mr H Sceptre]

  AlsoMike said:

  Hirst said:

I quite like the "struggling alcoholic" look

I'm cultivating this look at the moment, my beard is going well and I find that when teamed with a rough looking beanie hat people move out of my way much more quickly than they used to.

Yep, I'm a pretty infrequent shaver too. As I also have shaved hair I often look as though my head is on upside down.Agree that unkempt stubble in conjunction with hat means folk tend to keep out of your way.

[Parky]

My custard cream just fell in my tea. FAAAAARRRRKKKKKK!!!!!!Starting to wonder if maybe valium might be in order?

[Guest]

To the customer who tried to ring us at 11 am this morning, and was irate 'because I've not been able to get through for two minutes'.

 

FUCK YOU, YOU DISRESPECTFUL TWAT. How the agent didn't cut the call out of disgust I'll never know.

 

One of the senior managers got a text during the two minute silence as well.

 

Seriously, I know I like a good rant but words fail me on this occasion.

[Richard]

There was an old woman in Morrisons today who answered her phone during the silence and made no attempt to keep her call short or quiet. Disrespectful old hoor.

[ChinaTom]

Peterborough.

 

And Abbey National / Santander whatever they are.

 

Change of address details form submission. Conversation: (' signifies dropped t's)

 

"You avn' pu'an aas number"

"I don't have a number, just a name"

"You av to av a number or it won' en'aar"

"No, just type the postcode and it should show you the options"

"Oh yeah - you must work in a bank to know that"

"No, I don't, but now select the right name from the list on your screen"

"Is it Norwich, or Norfolk {she pronounced the l}"

"Both"

"But your caancil tax thingy doesn't say Norwich"

"Honestly, put both, or just Norfolk"

"So where do you actually live - Norwich, or Norfolk?"

"Both - Norwich is in Norfolk in the same way as Peterborough is in Cambridgeshire"

"I fawwt Pe'arborough was in Cambs"

"It is. Cambs is short for Cambridgshire"

"So where's Cambridge then?"

"Give me the form back please"

[brammy777]

gah, apparently my phonebill is £110 for last month and i dont understand how.Its 300 minutes and unlimited texts and is usually £30 a month, which it has been give or take a fiver each month, but how the f*** could I have gone 8 hours over on my calls?I dont think theyre right, i think i possibly have been charged for 2 months.......Why dont i get a bill through the post either? Doesnt seem right, its like they can take it out slyly without me asking.....

[MrDuke]

  ChinaTom said:

 

"You avn' pu'an aas number"

"I don't have a number, just a name"

"You av to av a number or it won' en'aar"

"No, just type the postcode and it should show you the options"

"Oh yeah - you must work in a bank to know that"

"No, I don't, but now select the right name from the list on your screen"

"Is it Norwich, or Norfolk {she pronounced the l}"

"Both"

"But your caancil tax thingy doesn't say Norwich"

"Honestly, put both, or just Norfolk"

"So where do you actually live - Norwich, or Norfolk?"

"Both - Norwich is in Norfolk in the same way as Peterborough is in Cambridgeshire"

"I fawwt Pe'arborough was in Cambs"

"It is. Cambs is short for Cambridgshire"

"So where's Cambridge then?"

"Give me the form back please"

 

You see, whenever you hear about people going mad with automatic weapons or Samurai swords in public, you just know that they've recently had an attempt at conversation with someone like that.

[Pete-M]

Arghh @ phones.I was given an o2 PAYG sim with free International calls recently so it's mega handy for calling my spannerman in Czech and ordering parts from Germany for t'Escort..Other day I rang a bloke to ask about his car and used that phone (as it was the nearest one to me). He said he'd send me some pics to the phone, fair enough says I.I'd kinda ignored the fact that I'm using an ancient Motorola for that sim card but figure that I'll just get the message from o2 "Your phone is shite, go on the internet and look at the picture there instead, cheapskate".So, next day I get a message from the chap, go to open it and the WAP interwebby thing kicks in to get the picture. Phone can't receive decent picture messages, so it flags up an error "Can't download". "Bugger" thinks I, and sends the bloke a text asking him to resend to my 'normal' mobile.10 minutes later, message on the Motorola from o2. "Call time empty, please top up now". Bloody phone had kept going onto the wap trying to get the pic and bladdered £10 worth of credit. Arrgh.

[Rusty Pelican]

Rubbish collection days Off to work at the normal time today and within half a mile a dustcart or whatever you call them stopped on the side of the road doing what they do , eventually after 10 minuites the queue in front gets past and im of , half a mile further on a T junction and a queue as far as i can see in my direction past the T junction held up by another one , Feck this il turn left then right and miss it all , another fecking one halfway up this road , get past , T junction at the end and you guessed it the one i turned right to avoid is there , WHY do this at bloody rush hour FFS , 28 minuites to do 3 miles , RUBBISH

[Pillock]

  Rusty Pelican said:

Rubbish collection days WHY do this at bloody rush hour FFS

Swap you, ours come round at 6.30am chucking the glass bins in the truck, shouting to each other, thumping wheelie bins around and generally being noisy. I'd love for that to happen closer to rush hour, when I might have already been awake.

[Conrad D. Conelrad]

  Pillock said:

ours come round at 6.30am chucking the glass bins in the truck, shouting to each other, thumping wheelie bins around and generally being noisy. I'd love for that to happen closer to rush hour, when I might have already been awake.

PARKLIFE

[OwdChina]

AAAAAARRGH..........I now have a criminal record in China, apparently. About 4 weeks ago the local authorities in China issued me a new 12 months China residency visa, it's a passport page size sticky document that is glued onto a page within my passport. The local authorities had my passport for 4 days to complete this process. When my passport was returned i hopped on a plane and returned to the UK for a couple of weeks.......makes sense eh...erm no. When returning to China ALL foreigners have to register their return with the local authorities, this means taking your passport, a photocopy of your passport, a photocopy of your current visa (is in your passport), and a photocopy of the last China entry stamp. And fill out another form .....again....... So far so good.....Except: "Oh,...you new visa" Yes, your looking at it. "You not register us" Erm,...you issued it. "You should register before leave China" But it was issued here. "No, not this office" Maybe, but it's the same building, with POLICE wrote on it. "Police not do visa. Upstair government do visa" Fer christ sakes. "This...aah...criminal offence" Eh............ "You pay now........500RMB" mumbles: Fer fucks sake So there it is, criminalized by local authority for not telling local authority that local authority has issued me a visa that local authority needs have registered with local authority..... Morons........Still, could've been worse, might of got locked up as a terrorist in England......and fined half a billion quid on top by the brainless bastards over there......... Tossers. edit: Just realised what the date is. Should've stayed in bed

[ChinaTom]

Don't lose any sleep about this - in 10 years I registered only once. The critical detail is the 500 rmb that enabled a nice piss-up for them that evening. The correct fine should be in the region of 2000 rmb, and instant deportation; but this has never happened. "police" means bugger all to anything - it is the Public Security (Gong An)that need your details, and they call themselves "police" although they are not. Jing Cha is the "police" as we recognize the term, and they don't care about immigration registration. They'll probably be in the same building. You DO NOT have a criminal record!! Just bad translation of "this is committing an offence that allows me and the boys to have a decent bottle of firewater this evening"Just take a walk along HuanShi East road, between Carrefour and the GD Internation hotel (that 70 story block where the Brit Embassy is) and count the amount of Nigerians sitting menacingly under the bridges. They have no visa whatsoever - tis them that are the crims.If you are on an F visa (business visa), it is the responsibility of your "host" to register you, not necessarily your own. Claim the 500 off the company you are working for and have a piss-up of your own. A residential visa organised in China needs more paperwork doing for your tax liability. I always stuck with F Visas so the Tax boys left me alone. As you'll pay more tax in China than you would in UK, I'd leave that subject untouched; stick with a 6 month multi entry Business visa and use the excuse to nip over to HK for a night every 6 months.I caused a bit of problem a few years ago when I let my visa expire while I was still in the far west (Golden Triangle area). The Gong An had a field day with me issuing fines until their pockets were full of 100's. Then, for fun they put me in front of the WuJing (Military police) to explain why I was in a controlled area with no valid visa, and a car full of white powder. I think I was 20 minutes away from a bullet in the head by the roadside (accepted justice for drug mules) when they finally accepted it was samples of galactose and raffinose from the factory I was visiting. Scary stuff. Cost me the best part of £1500 before they let me go - still visaless, to negotiate the next check-point. We managed to find mountain roads back to the nearest airport. I know how a drug smuggler feels now!Hopefully we can meet up before you escape - I'll let you know when I get back.T.

[chester drawers]

Speculative mail. Since the local authority published my planning application, seemingly every builder within a 25 mile radius has decided to mail shot me. This is fair enough in itself – times are hard and whilst I’d never select tradesmen on this basis, I presume people must or they wouldn’t do it.

 

I do however take exception to them skimping on the postage and leaving me a bill to pay in order to retrieve said mail shot from the local transfer depot. Faced with an anonymous large manila (no sender details) I had no choice but to pay the money.

 

Returning home I find another Royal Mail card through the door advising me to visit the transfer depot I’ve just come from. That and another threatening letter from the TV Licensing tossers who, despite being advised in writing (and several times by telephone) do not seem to understand the term building site. The paragraph that refers to home visits would appear to be bollocks too. 3 times I’ve invited you to come round and admire my lack of television and 3 times you’ve told me you don’t do home visits.

 

My Mother says I’m turning into Victor Meldrew. I think she may be right

[dollywobbler]

Music. WTF happened to it?! Why has it suddenly become a load of people you can't stand whinging and whining about stuff? All the X-Factor crap, Bon Jovi's latest song is an over-played travesty too. Loads and loads of this utter drivel.Which leads me on to Radio 2. It used to be quite good. Then the good person resigned over the TWATS incident (ie Brand and Ross, the overpaid, immature idiots) and since then, Radio 2 has turned into a station which plays a very occasional good old song, but generally all the stuff that's too wishy-washy for Radio 1. Apart from Cheryl Cole. They play her fuggin' awful single all the time for reasons I just cannot understand.Ok, there were power ballads in the Eighties, but there was a lot of nice fluffy stuff too - Howard Jones wittering on about what love was, Nik Kershaw and his silly 'man of arran' tune. Alison Moyet, the wonderfully wacky Kate Bush. Good times. Now? All rubbish. Rubbish, rubbish. rubbish.On the plus side, Bruce Forsyth is too ill to host Strictly tomorrow. Thank the Lord for small mercies!

[chester drawers]

  dollywobbler said:

Music. WTF happened to it?! Why has it suddenly become a load of people you can't stand whinging and whining about stuff? All the X-Factor crap, Bon Jovi's latest song is an over-played travesty too. Loads and loads of this utter drivel.Which leads me on to Radio 2. It used to be quite good. Then the good person resigned over the TWATS incident (ie Brand and Ross, the overpaid, immature idiots) and since then, Radio 2 has turned into a station which plays a very occasional good old song, but generally all the stuff that's too wishy-washy for Radio 1. Apart from Cheryl Cole. They play her fuggin' awful single all the time for reasons I just cannot understand.Ok, there were power ballads in the Eighties, but there was a lot of nice fluffy stuff too - Howard Jones wittering on about what love was, Nik Kershaw and his silly 'man of arran' tune. Alison Moyet, the wonderfully wacky Kate Bush. Good times. Now? All rubbish. Rubbish, rubbish. rubbish.On the plus side, Bruce Forsyth is too ill to host Strictly tomorrow. Thank the Lord for small mercies!

Get yourself off to some gigs. Good bands new and old, signed and unsigned are all there for the taking. Works for me anyway.

[Cavcraft]

People.Especially when you're trying to deal with them and laughably assume they may have morals, a brain or knowledge of truth.Ergo I win an item I want for a charidee auction. 'It's in the post' says seller next day.Ten days go by, no sign of it. Mail him. 'Oh they closed the Post Office round here so I sent it second class. Yesterday'.

[M'coli]

~More ebay shite: just lost a sle on the Avenger because ebay wouldn't let me ask the member who'd made the offer a question during the listing, so I had to decline it. Then the "contact us" section will only let you ask the questins they want to answer. Cucking funts.

[Pillock]

  chester drawers said:

That and another threatening letter from the TV Licensing tossers who, despite being advised in writing (and several times by telephone) do not seem to understand the term building site. The paragraph that refers to home visits would appear to be bollocks too. 3 times I’ve invited you to come round and admire my lack of television and 3 times you’ve told me you don’t do home visits.

 

 

So, correct me if I'm reading this wrong: You have a partially built house, that the TV Licensing people have latched onto as HAVING NO LICENCE. So you must buy one, as they won't come around to see that it is infact a building site with no TV, yet they cannot comprehend that someone with an address might not have a TV. So they'll keep demanding money for the TV that you don't have until, well, evAr.

 

Don't get me wrong, I love tellybox. I'm quite happy to dribble a few braincells out of my ear every so often slumped in front of People Do The Strangest Animals 3 or something. But I know a fair few folk without such a contraption and they've always had trouble convincing the powers that be of the fact - they seem to treat it as a temporary thing, and come back in a month hoping you'll have seen the error of your ways and bought one.

[seth]

  M'coli said:

Then the "contact us" section will only let you ask the questins they want to answer. Cucking funts.

I've struggled with that a couple of times recently after winning an item but wanting to ask a question relating to picking up but all it will let you do is take you to a "must pay now" type screen. Have eventually managed to find a way round it though. If I remembered what worked I'd tell you but I know I just kept trying by going straight to the sellers page and that kind of thing and trying to avoid the actual auction I'd won.Guess its another thing to make it difficult to pay in real money rather than Paypal.

[Pete-M]

  dollywobbler said:

Music. WTF happened to it?! Why has it suddenly become a load of people you can't stand whinging and whining about stuff? All the X-Factor crap, Bon Jovi's latest song is an over-played travesty too. Loads and loads of this utter drivel.Which leads me on to Radio 2. It used to be quite good. Then the good person resigned over the TWATS incident (ie Brand and Ross, the overpaid, immature idiots) and since then, Radio 2 has turned into a station which plays a very occasional good old song, but generally all the stuff that's too wishy-washy for Radio 1. Apart from Cheryl Cole. They play her fuggin' awful single all the time for reasons I just cannot understand.Ok, there were power ballads in the Eighties, but there was a lot of nice fluffy stuff too - Howard Jones wittering on about what love was, Nik Kershaw and his silly 'man of arran' tune. Alison Moyet, the wonderfully wacky Kate Bush. Good times. Now? All rubbish. Rubbish, rubbish. rubbish.

There was a huge amount of crap about in the 80's, dude. Collosal amounts of putrid effluent. You're obviously missing the good Radio 2 stuff, Radcliffe and Maconie, Mark Lamarr, the album documentaries they have quite often in the evening.I love Radio 2. Whenever I'm losing my faith in it I'll switch over to Radio 1 for a few minutes and I'm normally cured. If Radio 1 is as bad as it normally is I'll risk 10 minutes of Radio City - which as anyone who's ever been to God's Own City of Liverpool will know, is more often than not the most inane radio station on the planet.I'm a bit pissed off Sir Terry is going though, mainly because I love Chris Evans' Friday afternoon All Request Friday, but partly because Terry has made me laugh a lot more than is normal in the mornings.Richard Allinson (or whatever his name is) is the best 'stand-in' dj there is. Anyone who plays the full versions of stuff like Stairway to Heaven and Private Investigations gets my vote.

[M'coli]

  seth said:

  M'coli said:

Then the "contact us" section will only let you ask the questins they want to answer. Cucking funts.

I've struggled with that a couple of times recently after winning an item but wanting to ask a question relating to picking up but all it will let you do is take you to a "must pay now" type screen. Have eventually managed to find a way round it though. If I remembered what worked I'd tell you but I know I just kept trying by going straight to the sellers page and that kind of thing and trying to avoid the actual auction I'd won.Guess its another thing to make it difficult to pay in real money rather than Paypal.

My question was about them not letting me contact a buyer during an auction but this was outside the set of questions that they wanted to answer, so they didn't. I then filled out an e-mail proforma about this with a huge complaint and got a stock answer e-mail back about how to go about contacting a buyer after the auction was finished. So at lunchtime I opened a discussion with them, pointing out that I had lost a sale and thus they had lost their selling and paypal fees.Oddly enough, it has now been referred to an "appropriate department" and I should have a reply within 24-48 hours.It still makes me angry that you can't ask a simple question about something that they don't like.

[Rusty Pelican]

Agree with Pete , radio 2 is about the best there is , good choice of music wether its your taste or not , Wogan will be a great loss , thought id be borred with him after all these centuries but im not , highlights as well as Petes music wise , Black Sabbath , changes . Dire streights , telegraph road , and a whole day off live stuff from the abbey road studio , pure class

[Milford Cubicle]

I can't stand 99% of popular music, so I can't listen to music radio stations. It's either Radio 4 or my mp3 player.

[Claypole]

  chester drawers said:

Speculative mail. Since the local authority published my planning application, seemingly every builder within a 25 mile radius has decided to mail shot me. This is fair enough in itself – times are hard and whilst I’d never select tradesmen on this basis, I presume people must or they wouldn’t do it.

 

I do however take exception to them skimping on the postage and leaving me a bill to pay in order to retrieve said mail shot from the local transfer depot. Faced with an anonymous large manila (no sender details) I had no choice but to pay the money.

 

Returning home I find another Royal Mail card through the door advising me to visit the transfer depot I’ve just come from. That and another threatening letter from the TV Licensing tossers who, despite being advised in writing (and several times by telephone) do not seem to understand the term building site. The paragraph that refers to home visits would appear to be bollocks too. 3 times I’ve invited you to come round and admire my lack of television and 3 times you’ve told me you don’t do home visits.

 

My Mother says I’m turning into Victor Meldrew. I think she may be right

Same on the tv licence. Except I was building for 8 years. lol.

 

They did come round twice, once a shifty looking bloke who wouldn't come in after I answered the door in respirator and welding gloves.

 

Second was a double team of bloke and bird, actually came in for a snoop around but seemed more interested in the new kitchen... I was standing in front of a cupboard as I'd forgot that I put a 15" lcd in it the week before to keep the dust off it. Moved in now so paying weekly as it's for sale.

[CIH]

  Milford Cubicle said:

I can't stand 99% of popular music, so I can't listen to music radio stations. It's either Radio 4 or my mp3 player.

If you have the extreme good fortune to live in Manchester you get 106.1 Rock Radio, hosted by ex-Top Gear bike dude Steve Berry. X-FM come a close second but they're a bit too Yoof for me.