The grumpy thread

[warren t claim]

Lets have a look at what's wrong with me......

 

"What causes acute prostatitis?

 

Acute prostatitis is usually associated with lower urinary infection speading from the bladder or associated with sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) such as gonorrhoea or chlamydia."

 

Sounds nasty! Just as well I had the cause treated 18 years ago!

 

So what have I been left with for nearly two decades.......

 

"What is delayed or retarded ejaculation?

 

The terms 'delayed ejaculation’ (DE) and 'retarded ejaculation' (RE) mean the inability of a man to reach a climax inside the vagina.

 

I have seen a number of males with this problem. In a little over half of these cases, the man was eventually able to reach orgasm inside his partner’s vagina. "

 

Hmm.... Not all bad news though 'cos it explains this...

 

"In your youth, you may not feel you have a problem and may well assume that other men are the same.

 

When you first have sex with women, you may be very popular because you can keep going for two or three hours."

 

This explins why I can outlast even Sting.

[wuvvum]

I really must stop logging on to Autoshite whilst eating my lunch...

[Station]

I started changing the engine in an MGF in December, braving the miserable, cold weather in the late afternoons and every single weekend. It's a horrible job, bolts haven't been disturbed for 14 years, and 90% of them needed drilling out. It was a -horrible- job. It took just as long to get everything back together, as putting it in requires the back to be lifted up about 4 foot, and the subframe with the engine and gearbox sitting in it has to be 'wheeled' in.

 

I've just traced a severe metallic grating noise to the thrust/release bearing on the clutch.

 

This means I have to undo all the bolts disconnect all the wiring and hoses, lift the car up again, wheel the subframe out (takes two people), take the driveshafts/hubs off, unbolt all the mounts, lift the engine and gearbox out of the subframe (which is narrower than the engine and gearbox so you have to take it out at 45 degrees. On a engine crane. I'd wager they're about 300kg), take the bolts out of the gearbox and split from the engine.

 

And then take 5 seconds to put a new thrust bearing on the input shaft, and then put it all back together again.

 

I've spent way too much time on this car - it's just a piece of metal, but I fucking hate it.

[The Moog]

Work has caught up with Autoshite. Almost every other page is blocked due to Offensive & Tasteless Content.!

[scaryoldcortina]

Not so much grumpy as sad, but I thought you all would like to know.

 

Chaos the cat passed away (again) this afternoon. I have just buried her in the garden, under her favourite tree. RIP cat

[warren t claim]

I'm sorry to hear that.

[chaseracer]

Sleep well, Chaos - I'll bet you give St. Tiddles a hard time as you broadside through the Pearly Catflap!

[155V6]

R.I.P Chaos,really sorry for your loss

[M'coli]

I'm sorry about Chaos.

[dollywobbler]

OMG NO CHAOS! Sympathies. If Pebble had any concept of that emotion, I'm sure you'd be welcome to several pawfuls.

[ashmicro]

Sorry to hear that Scary.

[trigger]

RIP Chaos

 

On a different note, has anyone see then trailer for the Sky 1 program starting tonight called Mad Dogs?.

 

What is the blue classic car with the vinyl roof half hanging in the swimming pool?, It looks lovely what ever it is, I hope it was a trade up wreck...

[RedSparrow]

Sorry to hear about your cat scaryoldcortina.

[Lord Sterling]

Sorry to hear about that Scary. not nice. My cats just been to the vets after losing her voice. It got me pretty worried.

[scaryoldcortina]

Thanks everyone, at least we got an extra 10 days with her and were prepared for this, so that's something. 17 years is a long time for a cat.

[eddyramrod]

RIP Chaos. May your soul always lounge in front of the fire.

[eddyramrod]

RIP Chaos

 

On a different note, has anyone see then trailer for the Sky 1 program starting tonight called Mad Dogs?.

 

What is the blue classic car with the vinyl roof half hanging in the swimming pool?, It looks lovely what ever it is, I hope it was a trade up wreck...

 

I just looked that up on IMDB (having no Sky here); sorry, no photos on their listing, can't help.

[trigger]

This isn't the same video i saw but it does have the same car in it though.

 

http://sky1.sky.com/Sky1-HD-Mad-Dogs-Ne ... elle-Promo

[Guest Leonard Hatred]

Please send all donations for the Chaos memorial fund to [email protected]

[eddyramrod]

Thanks Trigger; looks like a late 60s/early 70s Valiant, from what I can see.

[warren t claim]

Can anyone advise me on a decent proctologist that DOESN'T look like an extra from the Cannonball Run?

[trigger]

[warren t claim]

That's him!

[autofive]

im grumpy this evening

 

before xmas (november i think) i sold an Essex engine to a local kid, to replace his knackered Scimitar motor, at the time (after trying to get it cheaper, with a free gearbox, and free delivery) he said it was going to sit on his garage floor for 2 - 3 months before fitting. he heard it running before he bought it, but as soon as he started with his discount & extras attempts, i knew he would be trouble

 

this afternoon he rang my mobile phone (i knew it was him and didnt answer) its now almost 11 o'clock and he's just rang for the 9th time, no messages left, but he seems determinded to reach me - i ll bet its not good news

[Guest]

1. Breaking a Volvo 480.

 

VOC idiocy strikes again. I mention that the rear (faded but uncracked) light clusters were for sale and mention a price, in bold.

 

PM: 'Hi mate are the rear lights available and in good condition and how much are they'. I dunno cumdribble, READ THE FUCKING ADVERT? I'm going to double the price and see if he notices.

 

2. Photobucket.

 

Hi, you've only uploaded two albums over a month but we've decided for some reason you've exceeded the bandwidth allocated to you, so unless you upgrade to Pro we're not unlocking your pictures until the 17th. HOW ABOUT FUCK OFF YOU GRASPING LITTLE ARSEHOLES?

 

Below is my pleasant reply acknowledging their idiocy:

 

 

Er, what?

 

I haven't uploaded anywhere near 10GB of content.

Reinstate my pictures NOW. Otherwise show me proof of this so called 'exceeded bandwidth.'

 

You can't prove shit. Reinstate my pictures NOW. You're not getting a penny from me you robbing bastards. I'm afraid that's called extortion. YOU advertise FREE accounts. I have NOT exceeded the bandwidth on my FREE account, so FUCKING WELL REINSTATE MY PHOTOS NOW.

 

Regards,

 

An extremely fucked off Photobucket user.

 

[autofive]

^^Bury him with the pussycat. You don't need the trouble. Tell him there's an arse in America who'd have given you three times the free price he got the parts for, and so really, you lost money on the deal. He can go quietly and mercifully, with an ax chop. Or you can fire up the woodchipper. His choice, because you're nice like that to everybody.

 

i dont have a woodchipper norm, but......

[trigger]

Think my wife miscarried tonight. Shit.

[CreepingJesus]

^truly sorry to hear that. My thoughts are with you both.

[Guest]

Think my wife miscarried tonight. Shit.

 

Oh mate, I'm so sorry to hear that. So sorry for you both.

[M'coli]

Oh Trig, I hope not.