The grumpy thread

[Split_Pin]

See 'Autoshite lexicon' thread but if the car isn't clean, or is parked in a carwash/bombsite and has other people milling about in the background then its a no from me.

Short replies either means they can't be arsed, are incredibly thick, or on the flip side, they possibly do not have good English. Some or all of these would make conversation difficult so again, I will avoid.

[SunnySouth]

8 hours ago, Mrcento said:

My 'favourite' right now of FB Marketplace, apart from the search being the most FUCKED it's ever been for me (It no longer shows new ads anywhere apart from the Marketplace landing page, going onto a category just shows ads from days ago and trying to view by most recent, they are still jumbled and start from about a week ago), is how apocalyptically fucking LAZY people are with ads.

I don't mind an ad where the seller doesn't ramble, just gives the basic, need to know points like MOT, any notable issues.

Every second ad i do find now is 1 or 2 words.

'Van 👍🏻'

Great, thanks for that, i'd never have fucking known what the Vauxhall Vivaro was otherwise, not for me, wanted a helicopter.

'It's fine'

Not good, just fine.

But my favourite one recently was one i actually messaged about, quite a rare thing so i thought 'fuck it, haven't seen one for years, ad is dreadful but i'll send a message and see if i can get more info'.

THE ENTIRE FUCKING CONVERSATION WAS 1 WORD REPLIES. And best of all, they weren't even spelt correctly half the time.

Ad was as follows.

'Starts, Needed rack'

So naturally i ask if they mean a steering rack, and does it currently need one, or do they mean it's just had one for an MOT?'

Reply

'Ned'.

Didn't know if he was insulting me (Scottish for Chav) or he was trying to say 'Needs', assumed he meant needs so proceeded with

'Does it drive?, How bad is the steering rack?, does it leak but still have power steering if topped up (i.e to drive home) or is it dead?'

Reply

'Leak'

'Can it be driven?'

'Start'

'Yes but does it drive?'

'Strts' (I assume he's trying to say it does drive and he's mashing 'starts and drives into 1 thing, poor english)

'And steering is working, just leaking, yes?'

'Leek'. (I again decide he's agreeing with me and that it is just losing fluid but otherwise is at least moveable for a short distance)

'Would i be able to come and have a look, where are you?' (Pics were taken quite local to me, and a quick look around google maps that had just been updated, i located it a few streets away so was pretty confident the guy at very least worked nearby)

'Ok'

'Where can i see the car?, pic looks like it's off xxxxx street?'

'Ok'

'So there then? When would be ok to come along?, I live 20 minutes from there so i can get along whenever suits'

'Fine'

'What time?'

'Yes'.

I didn't bother.

Ad still up to this day, was around that way a few weeks back and never saw it anywhere. So in all honesty, fuck knows.

Boys advertised a few cars, and seemingly not sold any. Can't understand why.

Perhaps he was hoping for an X Box? 😆

[alcyonecorporation]

Do I have it right that you can't opt out of Ebay's special needs postage now? 

 

[iainrcz]

The Mrs has come home from work upset because customers have been cunts .

She works for a school uniform supply company and fucking adults can't organise their kid's uniforms earlier than a couple of weeks before they go back to school, so they act like arseholes to the staff in the shop.

[108]

40 minutes ago, iainrcz said:

The Mrs has come home from work upset because customers have been cunts .

She works for a school uniform supply company and fucking adults can't organise their kid's uniforms earlier than a couple of weeks before they go back to school, so they act like arseholes to the staff in the shop.

Sister is a seamstress making school uniforms. 
 

The screaming over the phone that she has to deal with this time of year is unbelievable. 

[iainrcz]

10 minutes ago, 108 said:

Sister is a seamstress making school uniforms. 
 

The screaming over the phone that she has to deal with this time of year is unbelievable. 

You wouldn't believe some folk are supposed to be adults would you.

[adw1977]

9 hours ago, alcyonecorporation said:

Do I have it right that you can't opt out of Ebay's special needs postage now? 

 

If you're not registered as a business seller, I believe that is the case.

I haven't listed anything on eBay since they started charging the fees to the buyer.

[High Jetter]

4 hours ago, iainrcz said:

The Mrs has come home from work upset because customers have been cunts .

She works for a school uniform supply company and fucking adults can't organise their kid's uniforms earlier than a couple of weeks before they go back to school, so they act like arseholes to the staff in the shop.

Tbh it's not new. I had that c50 years ago

[High Jetter]

I had to wear specs to see the blackboard, late junior school. Worn many pairs over the years, never abused or broken a frame.

N

Not the hinge mech, it's pulled off.

[Metal Guru]

6 hours ago, 108 said:

Sister is a seamstress making school uniforms. 
 

The screaming over the phone that she has to deal with this time of year is unbelievable. 

You obviously get a better standard of customer when they are having uniforms made, rather than the rest of us scum who buy them in Tesco or Asda.

[comfortablynumb]

MK2 grandson is about to start a special needs school, he's autistic and nonverbal.

School provides his uniform for the first couple of years 🙏

Not that I can see MK2 daughter shouting down the phone at them for something that ridiculous 

[EyesWeldedShut]

It’s my birthday 🎂 

So far I’ve driven two and a half hours to deliver my wife to the ‘local’ MRI scanner.  The hospital car park is free 👍

But there’s a TV in the waiting room with some mind numbing breakfast TV drivel on it (features some Dermott guy). 😩

But the big plus is from Evri - sorry unable to deliver as their van has broken down ☹️

[edit} - back home,  130 miles, 4 and a half hours driving for a 12 minute appointment.
But I munched a splendid lunch on the way home to then  find:
a brake caliper, pads & flexis on the doorstep from Royal Mail
a bottle of Chateauneuf from the in-laws
Happy days.

What to do for the rest of the day.......

[goosey]

I remember a time when Beefeater was the premium option, yes it cost a bit more but you didn’t mind because it was always decent quality and an ok place to be in, now it feels like your paying £22 for main that should really be no more than £8. I don’t bother with the meal deal when I’m working away now I just have the breakfast which they seem to be able to get mostly right. 
 

[EyesWeldedShut]

On 19/08/2025 at 18:46, iainrcz said:

You wouldn't believe some folk are supposed to be adults would you.

Unfortunately they can still breed despite their attitude afflictions?

[High Jetter]

Went to Bexhill-on Sea today. I worked there (Honda Car Centre) many years ago, but bugger me it's changed. Got off the train, headed for our usual pub by the post office - but it's now a poncy kitchen / bakery / cafe. Found a couple of pubs, neither did food. Shop on seafront with many signs outside, burgers, fish-n-chips, etc - but they only had chicken or veggie burgers. Nearby cafe seemed to tick the boxes - but burger & chips twice, a half pint of draught lager and a medium glass of white wine came to (drumroll) ...

Spoiler

£35.05

 

[reb]

2 minutes ago, High Jetter said:

Went to Bexhill-on Sea today. I worked there (Honda Car Centre) many years ago, but bugger me it's changed. Got off the train, headed for our usual pub by the post office - but it's now a poncy kitchen / bakery / cafe. Found a couple of pubs, neither did food. Shop on seafront with many signs outside, burgers, fish-n-chips, etc - but they only had chicken or veggie burgers. Nearby cafe seemed to tick the boxes - but burger & chips twice, a half pint of draught lager and a medium glass of white wine came to (drumroll) ...

  Hide contents

£35.05

 

Bloody hell that's more than we spent in spoons last night and we had food and enough drinks for two of us to be somewhat past a little drunk.

[Jazoli]

You can't compare any other cafe/restaurant to spoons, the overheads and turnover are vastly different.

[High Jetter]

3 hours ago, Jazoli said:

You can't compare any other cafe/restaurant to spoons, the overheads and turnover are vastly different.

Yea, I get it's a zone one location rates-wise, but shirley they could have bought some vinegar for her to have on her chips.

[Spiny Norman]

For the second time Scottish Power or rather their sub contractor Sure Serve, have failed to fit me my new leccy meter. 
First time the cunt just never showed up, no phone call, nada. Today he appears half an hour before he was supposed to, takes one look at my set up and says 'Ah yeah, I don't have the replacement for these in the van. - If you had type X or type Y then I could do it but yours is type Z and they're on back order' 

Second day taken off work wasted. 

[alcyonecorporation]

The bloke next door to work. 

Another example of Southerners being psychotically territorial about spaces they don't own. MY FUCKING FIEFDOM YO.

He's shutting for the night (it's not his business or his building, but he abuses the terms 'my building' and 'my business' on a daily basis) and the ramp up the side of the building, a shared parking area, is packed with customer's cars, my boss's car, dogs, people playing tennis (don't ask, it's a weird town), whatever, there's nowhere else to park (and especially not in the bus stop parallel to the shop).  

An older couple walk up to the side of the car and pull a bit of a face as he's rolling the shutters down. He says (loudly): 'I've told them a thousand times not to park outside MY BUILDING obstructing MY CUSTOMERS', glaring at me as he says it. 

Oh aye mate, yeah, the customers that can't use your* fucking shop BECAUSE IT'S FUCKING WELL CLOSED?
Who am I obstructing? Ghosts?
My patience, turned ephemeral? 
I don't park in front of his* building**  when it's open, because that's cunty. I have *never* parked in front of his* shop when it's open. 

He then turns to me: 'You! Don't park here!'
Me: "You're closed for the night, and there's nowhere to park."
Him: 'Your boss parks in the bus stop.'
Me: "I'm not my boss. I don't park in bus stops (I do when the buses stop running, because...you know - the buses aren't running). 
Him (with a 'how fucking dare you question me' face): 'DON'T PARK HERE!!!'
Me: "You're closed for the night, why does it matter?" 
Him: [starts ranting and raving, tells me again to park in the bus stop, I tell him again I don't park in active bus stops, he yells 'DON'T PARK HERE!' again while twitching and going red in the face] 
Me: "You're closed for the night, why does it matter?"
Him: [carries on ranting]
Me: "You're closed for the night, why does it matter?" 

In the end, he stomps off to his car, gets in and fucks off so violently he nearly rips the front bumper off (no Audi A8 detected). 

In a staggering twist to this tale, he comes in screaming last night telling me to 'MOVE [my] FUCKING CAR!' 
I walk out, silently, and plip my car, which is up the side of the building (remember, it's a shared ramp/driveway). It's not in front of the shutters, which are down, because, again, the shop is closed. 

It's a different red car in front of his* shutters. I do the 'what the fuck' mime, turn around and go back into the shop, muttering 'fucking stupid prick' loud enough for him to hear. 

Whatever. I may just be a delivery driver and therefore the lowest of the low, but if you're going to argue, I dunno...make fucking sense?

Shall we pull your argument apart, mate? 

It's not your business, and it's not your building, and your shop, within the building you rent, as part of the collective shop, is closed. 
Therefore, the shop's customers aren't obstructed, BECAUSE THE SHOP, THAT YOU DON'T OWN, IS FUCKING WELL CLOSED.  I AM THEREFORE OBSTRUCTING NOBODY. FUCK OFF TALKING DOWN TO ME BECAUSE YOU RENT A FUCKING SPACE IN A FUCKING SHOP FOR YOUR FUCKING STUPID BUSINESS. I'M A BUSINESS OWNER TOO! BIG FUCKING WHOOP. WHAT DO YOU WANT, A FUCKING 21 GUN SALUTE? 

Your statement is 100 per cent incorrect. *I* have never parked in front of your* shop while it's open.
Do you know how fucking stupid you sound? 

[* and ** not his building, not his shop. I'm emphasising this because he loves to go on and on about his* building and his** shop, the deluded arsehole].

[Mally]

7 minutes ago, alcyonecorporation said:

The bloke next door to work. 

Another example of Southerners being psychotically territorial about spaces they don't own. MY FUCKING FIEFDOM YO.

He's shutting for the night (it's not his business or his building, but he abuses 'my building' and 'my business' on a daily basis) and the ramp up the side of the building is packed with customer's cars, my boss's car, dogs, people playing tennis, whatever, there's nowhere else to park (and especially not in the bus stop parallel to the shop).  

An older couple walk up to the side of the car and pull a bit of a face as he's pulling the shutters down. He says (loudly): 'I've told them a thousand times not to park outside MY BUILDING obstructing MY CUSTOMERS', glaring at me as he says it. 

Oh aye mate, yeah, the customers that can't use your* fucking shop BECAUSE IT'S FUCKING WELL CLOSED?
Who am I obstructing? Ghosts?
My patience, turned ephemeral? 
I don't park in front of his* building**  when it's open, because that's cunty. I have *never* parked in front of his* shop when it's open. 

He then turns to me: 'You! Don't park here!'
Me: "You're closed for the night, and there's nowhere to park."
Him: 'Your boss parks in the bus stop.'
Me: "I'm not my boss. I don't park in bus stops (I do when the buses stop running, because...you know - the buses aren't running). 
Him (with a 'how fucking dare you question me' face): 'DON'T PARK HERE!!!'
Me: "You're closed for the night, why does it matter?" 
Him: [starts ranting and raving, tells me again to park in the bus stop, I tell him again I don't park in active bus stops, he yells 'DON'T PARK HERE!' again while twitching and going red in the face] 
Me: "You're closed for the night, why does it matter?"
Him: [carries on ranting]
Me: "You're closed for the night, why does it matter?" 

In the end, he stomps off to his car, gets in and fucks off so violently he nearly rips the front bumper off (no Audi A8 detected). 

In a staggering twist to this tale, he comes in screaming last night telling me to 'MOVE [my] FUCKING CAR!' 
I walk out, silently, and plip my car, which is up the side of the building (it's a shared ramp/driveway). It's not in front of the shutters, which are down, because, again, the shop is closed. 

It's a different red car in front of his* shutters. I do the 'what the fuck' mime, turn around and go back into the shop, muttering 'fucking stupid prick' loud enough for him to hear. 

Whatever. I may just be a delivery driver and therefore the lowest of the low, but if you're going to argue, I dunno...make fucking sense?

Shall we pull your argument apart, mate? 

It's not your business, and it's not your building, and your shop, within the building you rent, as part of the collective shop, is closed. 
Therefore, the shop's customers aren't obstructed, BECAUSE THE SHOP, THAT YOU DON'T OWN, IS FUCKING WELL CLOSED.  I AM THEREFORE OBSTRUCTING NOBODY. FUCK OFF TALKING DOWN TO ME BECAUSE YOU RENT A FUCKING SPACE IN A FUCKING SHOP FOR YOUR FUCKING STUPID BUSINESS. I'M A BUSINESS OWNER TOO! BIG FUCKING WHOOP. WHAT DO YOU WANT, A FUCKING 21 GUN SALUTE? 

Your statement is 100 per cent incorrect. *I* have never parked in front of your* shop while it's open.
Do you know how fucking stupid you sound? 

[* and ** not his building, not his shop. I'm emphasising this because he loves to go on and on about his* building and his** shop, the deluded arsehole].

That's a fair grump. I thought it deserved more publicity.

[alcyonecorporation]

@Mally Look, other people might well have parked in front of his* shop**, but not me. 

But delivery drivers, eh? What scum, right? We're all the fucking same, clearly.