The grumpy thread

[Lord Sterling]

A few weeks ago the local Nissan Stanza disappeared from its drive to be replaced by an E reg Corolla. Now the Corolla is shite, but not quite as shite....and the Stanza has now been deleted from the DVLA record so it has been scrapped. Well to top it all off, I was driving past the house that had a Fiat Strada SuperSport convertible rusting in the front garden today, and I noticed an estate agent's sign and no Fiat in the garden

Did you get any pics of these gems? You really need get pics as they will disappear...

 

A few months back I was passing by Wednesbury, down a local main road was a house which front garden really did resemble a scrap yard, I took notice because there was a Blue 87' E-reg 825 Sterling in the garden that had been sat there for 10+ years. (Rootes_Arrow took a pic a few years back of a Red Bedford Astravan outside that house)

 

Knocked on the front door to see what the game was but no answer, went a few more times, around the 4th time I got an answer, old boy and his son were there, got talking to them, nice chaps, sadly old man didnt have long to live so they were in the process of clearing stuff out.

 

Anyway, to cut a long story short, 825 had been fragged after old boy had passed away, I had asked for some parts as I had a bit of money then, but alas it wasnt to be.

[brammy777]

I remember seeing a shot of that Stanza, didnt look too grotty either. Seems odd that it just gets scrapped, whilst that saloon one in Fleet has been sat there for 13 years along with 4 other cars without any issue.

[Angrydicky]

It was a bit shabby, but seemed to go alright...I bet it failed the MOT on welding. The Corolla that replaced it is in much better condition.

 

Stanza:

 

 

Strada:

 

 

R.I.P.

[Lord Sterling]

Heres mine:

 

 

R.I.P

[Richard]

Some bollocks from Alex Lame

I think you'll find he's called George Lame, shouty cokehead mockney cunt and ruiner of 6 Music. He's like the bastard son of Chris Moyles and Steve Wright but he somehow manages to have even less charm and talent than either. He really is incredibly inarticulate for a TV/radiopresenter. Forefathers of Range Rover in the 80s my arse, and he said Land Rover when the whole occasion was about pretending Range Rover is a brand.

 

Also, if you're celebrating 40 years of Range Rover surely you should have the original incarnation represented, not the 80s facelift. I only watched to see who the least talented Spice Girl was. It was between three but I guessed right.

 

They're obviously shooting for the thicko market.

[Tayne]

.

[Cavcraft]

WHAT. A. PILE. OF. WANK.

 

http://www.landrover.com/gb/en/lr/lrx-c ... 56O,H6NB,1

 

Click on the red link if you dare.

 

A random selection of older models, a minute and a half focused on a white box and then the reveal of a concept that's been around for over a year.

Some bollocks from Alex Lame, some more from pope and mcgovern (fitting tribute to Spen - my arse) and then three minutes focused on someone who's best claim to fame is being the least talented one in the spice girls.

 

No details, no interior shots, no fuck all.

 

Two wheel drive. I might just cry.

Is that heap of shit looking new Range Rover?

If so just to make matters worse that vile, pouty stick insect slag Victoria 'famous for my husband' Beckham has apparantly had a hand in designing some part of it.

 

Tried to keep off this thread because I'm rapidly turning into Victor Meldrew but here's todays gripe:

 

Having done our back yard up is it too much to ask to be able to sit out there in the nice weather without having to fucking tip toe in/out?

Every twatting time I do go out I get mithered to bollocks by neighbours and it's beginning to grate now.

I know one of them is knocking on a bit and lonely and I do feel some sympathy for her but for the love of God STOP FUCKING MITHERING ME. Let me drink my tea/read my book/talk to the cats/talk to the plants/chill out/whatever without driving me fucking mad with your fucking bastard inane twatting drivel about the others neighbour's fucking bastard net cunting curtains.

[Albert Ross]

Maybe the old Giffer wants a shag?

[Mr H Sceptre]

Maybe the old Giffer wants a shag?

 

Urrrrrgh! Nearly spewed up my cuppa!

[Negative Creep]

I quite like the new Landie............

[Cavcraft]

Maybe the old Giffer wants a shag?

Pass me your 'phone number and I'll see what I can do. Don't build your hopes up mind.

[AnthonyG]

I thought the LRX was going to be a new 'entry level' car for Land Rover, its certainly smaller than a Freelander, but the use of the Range Rover 'brand' certainly implies it won't be cheaper than a Freelander.

 

BTW, it looks bloody awful

[maxpower]

WHAT. A. PILE. OF. WANK.

 

http://www.landrover.com/gb/en/lr/lrx-c ... 56O,H6NB,1

 

Click on the red link if you dare.

 

A random selection of older models, a minute and a half focused on a white box and then the reveal of a concept that's been around for over a year.

Some bollocks from Alex Lame, some more from pope and mcgovern (fitting tribute to Spen - my arse) and then three minutes focused on someone who's best claim to fame is being the least talented one in the spice girls.

 

No details, no interior shots, no fuck all.

 

Two wheel drive. I might just cry.

Is that heap of shit looking new Range Rover?

If so just to make matters worse that vile, pouty stick insect slag Victoria 'famous for my husband' Beckham has apparantly had a hand in designing some part of it.

 

Tried to keep off this thread because I'm rapidly turning into Victor Meldrew but here's todays gripe:

 

Having done our back yard up is it too much to ask to be able to sit out there in the nice weather without having to fucking tip toe in/out?

Every twatting time I do go out I get mithered to bollocks by neighbours and it's beginning to grate now.

I know one of them is knocking on a bit and lonely and I do feel some sympathy for her but for the love of God STOP FUCKING MITHERING ME. Let me drink my tea/read my book/talk to the cats/talk to the plants/chill out/whatever without driving me fucking mad with your fucking bastard inane twatting drivel about the others neighbour's fucking bastard net cunting curtains.

i totally sympathise with you as i have a neighbour the exact same.. but i the thing that annoys me is that the drivel she is talking is the same drivel she told me 2days ago and the same drivel 7 days ago

[Lord Sterling]

WHAT. A. PILE. OF. WANK.

 

http://www.landrover.com/gb/en/lr/lrx-c ... 56O,H6NB,1

 

Click on the red link if you dare.

 

A random selection of older models, a minute and a half focused on a white box and then the reveal of a concept that's been around for over a year.

Some bollocks from Alex Lame, some more from pope and mcgovern (fitting tribute to Spen - my arse) and then three minutes focused on someone who's best claim to fame is being the least talented one in the spice girls.

 

No details, no interior shots, no fuck all.

 

Two wheel drive. I might just cry.

Fuck-in-hell. And I thought I'd seen it all, I thought we'd gone low as we can go, but something else always turns up.

 

I feel sick and full of dispair, I really do

[Parky]

TRUCKIES! Is your truck 0.00000001 mph faster than the one in front? Why not try overtaking! You will only hold everyone on the dual carriageway at a fixed 56mph for an hour or so, and despite pressing schedules we wont mind. Especially when you both drop to 40mph on the uphill section, we love it when you do that!

 

SURGEONS! When examining my operation scar, why not poke around the bits that havent healed, clean them with a piece of coarse lint better suited to removing paint from furniture, and then drop some silver nitrate in the wound to help dry it? You cant beat intense physical burning which leaves you desperately looking for a new profanity to summarise how bad it feels! And while you're there, why not charge me a hundred and fifty f*ckin quid for the privilege!

 

WIVES! Why not try running up a MAHOOSIVE phone bill nattering to your mates in New Zealand! Especially considering you have told me you sorted out the international discount rate calls when according to BT, nobody has arranged that!

 

WIVES 2! When hubbie has been away trying to earn cash to pay for his luxury items (mortgage, utilities, etc), why not spend a load of his cash on a present for your mates birthday! He had nothing planned for that money after all, he is sure the Nationwide wont mind not getting paid this month.

 

WIVES 3! Its ok, I know you have been at home for two days on your own, I seriously didnt expect you to do any tidying up or laundry or cook anything for me, thats fine. If it wasnt for the laundry, I'd have nothing to do at the weekends so thanks for giving me something to look forward to.

 

ENTERPRISE RENT-A-CAR! When I ask for a lift home, you tick "YES" in the "Needs lift home" box on your form. When telling two people in your organisation that I need a lift home, and confirming the address I need a lift to, I fail to see how by giving my home address would mean I wouldnt want a lift home.

 

Phew, needed to vent that, cheers chaps.

[retrogeezer]

You might know this already but just in case you don't, you can call NZ for a penny a minute by dialing another number first:

 

http://www.planet-numbers.co.uk/phone_new_zealand.jsp

 

Or even cheaper, get skype and call for nothing.

[brammy777]

I agree with the surgeons bit there, when I went to the dentist he poked my infected gum with that tool usually used to find cavaties. Yes, I can feel that rather sharp metallic object on my fleshy and swollen gum, thanks.

[Station]

I like that 'Land/Range Rover', but it doesn't look like a Land Rover at all.

I think the whole Posh Spice link is just a gimmick in which they will ask what colour the seats she'll like, and get offered swatches of five colours, and she'll pick one. I doubt they're stupid enough to let her anywhere near the CAD software.

 

[myglaren]

You might know this already but just in case you don't, you can call NZ for a penny a minute by dialing another number first:

 

http://www.planet-numbers.co.uk/phone_new_zealand.jsp

 

Or even cheaper, get skype and call for nothing.

Or Google Talk.

Or, if you have BT Broadband, use the softphone to call anywhere free.

[pogweasel]

Obvious really, but the M25 on a Friday.

Why does everyone in the world need to be on the M25 on a Friday.

Bastards.

 

Left Abercynon at 2, by 3.45 I was at Slough.... got home just after 6.

Truro next week, returning Friday pm.

That is not going to be fun.

[peter9000uk]

CHUFFIN CYCLISTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Please do not use the 4ft wide cycle lane provided , I much prefer you to use the main carriageway and hold all the traffic up.

 

Lycra clad twat

[Pillock]

Aaah, well I can excuse them in the winter, when roads are gritted and cycletracks are not.

 

However I too was greatly annoyed by a cyclist riding three feet into the road, whilst a lovely cyclepath was marked out on the pavement. I'd love to have a path specifically laid out for my use! Use it you ungrateful bastard!

 

And as a sometime-cyclist, I much prefer to use the dedicated paths so as not to find wingmirrors passing inches from my fingers.

[Station]

Went for a drive up to Preston/Leyland, just to get out of the house. Basically, cruised around at a constant 30mph for 3 hours whatever the road - ultra slow in fifth gear, doing 100 miles on ten quid! Coming home through the Mersey Tunnel, pay at the exit toll booth, the gate opens, and for no reason whatsoever, I thoroughly booted it out of the gate in 1st, and what came out of the next gate behind me? A bleedin' police Range Rover.

Only realised when I pulled in front of him to go onto the motorway. Don't know why he didn't pull me over - I wasn't speeding, but I did come out a little quick - the first time I've been 'enthusiastic' in about two years!

[maxpower]

FUCKING POLICE

 

why is it when they chase the bad guys at night they can't be arsed using the skills of detection.. instead it's let's call the eye in the sky...

 

and the cnuts spend most of that time hovering above my fuckin house at 2am

 

they sit up there until they need to refuel then fly past tower block next to me just to make sure we get the feedback of the sound bouncing from tower block.

this is about the 6th fuckin time this has happened... i would love to find out who the pilot is... i would go round to his house in my car, rip exhaust off and revs the bollox outta it while he is trying to sleep!

[Parky]

+1 on Police choppers. We get that a lot as I live near the Dartford Tunnel / Lakeside so theres always some Boy Racers getting chased. I really dont know what the harm is TBH - we are all enthusiasts and have no doubt shown off our motors to our mates in our youth. The distant sound of a tuned Fiestas exhaust for a few seconds is preferable to the drone of a circling helicopter.

 

I suppose from Plods perspective its a great opportunity to wipe the scum off the streets. You know what I mean, the REAL scum who have incorrect number plates / do 35 in a 30 zone, etc etc.

[autofive]

Went for a drive up to Preston/Leyland, just to get out of the house. Basically, cruised around at a constant 30mph for 3 hours whatever the road - ultra slow in fifth gear, doing 100 miles on ten quid! Coming home through the Mersey Tunnel, pay at the exit toll booth, the gate opens, and for no reason whatsoever, I thoroughly booted it out of the gate in 1st, and what came out of the next gate behind me? A bleedin' police Range Rover.

Only realised when I pulled in front of him to go onto the motorway. Don't know why he didn't pull me over - I wasn't speeding, but I did come out a little quick - the first time I've been 'enthusiastic' in about two years!

after a police check showed taxed, insured and no recent change of keeper the police generally wouldn't bother.

and anyway - speeding is not most police forces main concern on the roads.

too many uninsured & stolen motors driving about, and / or terrible drivers for plod to pull a legal driver

[Parky]

RETROGEEZER / MYGLAREN

 

Cheers for the tips - I ranted at BT when I discovered they have a thing called International Freedom where for a fiver a month you can call NZ for up to 70 hours for free. Cheers for telling me about that you b*stards. That would have reduced the £150 worth of calls to £15 and made my total bill £50 for the quarter.

 

And ironically we have Skype. My missus installed it and bought a sh*t hot webcam for the purpose of chatting to her mum. She has used it twice........

 

Still I mentioned the bill to her when she got home last night. She adopted the look of a puppy which has been caught chewing your slippers. This bill has at least guaranteed me peace and quiet as there is no way she is going to push me to go to Ikea this weekend to buy soft furnishings - Almost a price worth paying!

[STUNO]

And I have to call deepest Dorset tonight from NZ. It is going to cost me , but at least only I call

to start with

[Rocket88]

More ebat twattery. I have a 505 dizzler up for auction, and made the mistake, [quickly rectified] of inviting anyone with questions to call.........

"Hello, it's about the Peugeot"

"How can I help"

"Where are you?"

In spite of some fairly explicit info on the advert as to where Jersey is, this mong obviously hadn't got the message, anyway after lengthy further explanations from me, he comes out with....

"How do I get there by train......"

 

Obviously the concept of an island is too much for some people to grasp.

[Station]

Why do people do this? They take the time to buy the stuff, to climb the side of the mountain, to get a fire going, to spend three or four hours getting drunk, etc etc., and then they can't just put their cheap garbage in a bag and put it into a bin? What is wrong with some people?