The grumpy thread

[Barry Cade]

Our oven ( and Mil's actually ) both had the door glass explode while cooking a roast . What a fucking mess and waste of food . Never buy a diplomat oven !

Unless Michael Caine's coming for tea. Lasagne maybe?

[Eddie Honda]

I clean the windows

You are Sinbad AICMFP.

 

[MarvinsMom]

shit, he is young (and thin) in that picture!

[M'coli]

My mother in law has chosen to leave hospital - she knows she is dying and wants to be with her family.

 

Palliative care are sorting out a plan so she will be coming back to us.

 

I would never refuse anybody their final wish.

Sad times indeed, but I have clicked the like button because I also believe it is good - good for the MIL, as she is of sound mind and wishes to spend her remaining time in her own way.

 

My dad passed away around this time of year 13 years ago, and the hospital were mightily pissed off that a "day visit home" turned into much longer...Dad was a keen gardener; when he'd built the extension mum & dad's bedroom had a huge window looking down the garden, he'd planted an avenue of his favourite trees and shrubs (early bloomers) and spring was fairly early that year. Why would he want to go back to a ward that looked out over a city? :-)

[DSdriver]

Somebody dinged the front wing on the XM while it was parked at Chatham Marina. They very kindly left a note on the windscreen pointing out what they had done and apologising but not leaving any contact details. Is anyone breaking a green XM with a good nearside wing?

[xtriple]

Fucking LOL!

 

A few weeks back the handle snapped off my frying pan and smeared my omelette across the floor. Fortunately I have no dignity or standards so I just scooped it and ate it.

I'd have to be fucking quick to beat Chester!

 

We had our oven explode while it was all on its own in the kitchen (where else realistically?) , turned off and hadn't been used all day. Scared the dinner we had had right out of us! Me being, me, bodged it back together as it was less than a week until Christmas and it was going to get hammered! Bought a new one in the sales

[michael1703]

Fucking LOL!

 

A few weeks back the handle snapped off my frying pan and smeared my omelette across the floor. Fortunately I have no dignity or standards so I just scooped it and ate it.

Hope you kept the frying pan.

 

I've rewelded handles onto pans and I keep mugs that leak and mugs with no handles.

 

My saying is: a dog with 3 legs is still a dog

[michael1703]

Talking of dogs, mines been a bit flat, he had the shits this morning,off his food, had a trip to the vets and anally probed and I've got some meds and food down him and is lying next to me on the bed peacefully.

 

I'm ready for a sleepless night and a visit to the out of hours vet if needed though

[artdjones]

You are Sinbad AICMFP.

 

505611851.jpg

Naa,I'd never wear that dopey smile to work, or that leather jacket,although he does look a bit like me 30 years ago.

[doobietoo]

I'd have to be fucking quick to beat Chester!

 

 

 

The 4 second rule becomes pointless when you have a 2 second dog.....

[xtriple]

Talking of dogs, mines been a bit flat, he had the shits this morning,off his food, had a trip to the vets and anally probed and I've got some meds and food down him and is lying next to me on the bed peacefully.

 

I'm ready for a sleepless night and a visit to the out of hours vet if needed though

Best of luck for a quiet night mate. Had a few nights like that with Phoebe- vets out of hours number is on fucking speed dial! Do they know what the matter is? Mind you, when they have the shits it's usually 'cos they have eaten something they shouldn't. Fortunately, Pheebs doesn't usually eat stuff when she's out (except cat shit!) but Chester eats EVERYTHING... he seems to have a fairly cast iron gut as well as a massively fat one.

 

Hope your mate is all better in the morning.

[michael1703]

He hardly moved all night and then woke up and had a panic attack.

 

Lame in his back legs,panting,heavy breathing,took him outside but he doesn't want to go.

 

He had blood in his poo last night which caused concern so I'm taking him back this morning.

 

He's ok now, hopefully he's hungry in a while and I can get food and meds down him

[bub2006]

Hope the fella is ok micheal. Great companions and I miss mine

[DSdriver]

Have you counted all his squeaky toys? Hope he feels better soon.

[dave21478]

Army to please be fucking off now thankyou kindly.

 

4 Helicopters have been chopping about pretty low overhead all fucking afternoon. Kinda sick of it now.

[michael1703]

I think all the pills and food kicked in, he seems back to his usual self.

 

Barking,tail wagging,dropping sticks on my customers feet and his mum and brother dropped by for a visit and he had a good sniff of her ladybits and drooled on her and tried to mount her.

[OwdChina]

I feel your pain there Dave. We live not to far away from Camp Pendleton military base and have friggin huge double rotor copters and gunships flying right over the house every day. Pain in the arse.

 

Edit:

Oh, Quote button not working. 

[Tamworthbay]

He hardly moved all night and then woke up and had a panic attack.

Lame in his back legs,panting,heavy breathing,took him outside but he doesn't want to go.

He had blood in his poo last night which caused concern so I'm taking him back this morning.

He's ok now, hopefully he's hungry in a while and I can get food and meds down him

one of our dogs was similar once, she passed so much blood I was convinced she was a gonner. A course of steroids and antibiotics later and she was fine and lasted a few years after that with no ill effects.

[Aston Martin]

I sold the 100hp and I have nearly 4 months of cover left, about £75 quid refund....... minus the £50 cancellation fee plus insurance premium tax fee of £3. 

 

Bastards.

 

 

[Jazoli]

Fucking VW's, daughters washer motor has stopped working in her 2012 Polo, and she's just about to leave for work, no problem says I, I'll go and change the fuse, will only take a minute,  remove fusebox lid, open owners manual to find correct page for the fusebox diagram and it is not there, just a fucking useless paragraph saying that changing fuses is potentially damaging and dangerous and the car should be taken to the dealer for diagnosis, what the cunting fuck? no twatting diagram, I have never owned a car without a diagram and/or list of fuse numbers, who in their fucking tiny mind thought this was a good idea? what a bunch of utter cunthairs, I don't have time to have a look and inspect all the fuses as she is going to be late for work so will have to do it tomorrow, fuck you VW, what an utterly moronic fucking idea and another step to dissuade people from DIY'ing their cars and forcing people back to the dealer for stupid little things, cunts 

[Jazoli]

Is it on the reverse of the fusebox lid?

 

Also - are you going for the Autoshite Cunt Count award 2016? 

 

No it isn't, I've managed to find it online but its not clear what is what.

 

And yes, after a long hard day at work it was enough to trip my own c word filter

[twosmoke300]

Would a washer pump not working really stop her going to work ? Bet the boss would love that one!

[Lankytim]

I've been working on a "mystery shitter" over the last couple of days and part of the work involved removing the downpipe from the manifold cat. It's one of those arranements where there's a weird fibre "washer" between the two pipes and the whole lot is held togehter with two bolts with springs under them to apply even pressure. Of course, the bolts were rusted to fook and snapped off the nanosecond a modicum of pressure was applied.

 

I ground the remnants of the bolts flush with the cat and tried to drill them out... No luck, so I bit the bullet and took it to my local shite friendly garage to have the bolts drilled out and tapped.

 

"urrgh, might not be possible"... "these always break as soon as you touch them, you should just scrap it, it'll be a pain to sort"

 

I'm sure it's not beyond the wit of man to sort a couple of snapped bolts in a cast iron cat housing. It's right at the bottom of the engine with easy access FFS. The garage should encounter this shit every day. Just get on with it and take my beer tokens!

 

P.S more on the mystery shitpiece soon!

[Jazoli]

Would a washer pump not working really stop her going to work ? Bet the boss would love that one!

 

I never said it would, just that I didn't have time to fix it as she needed to leave.

[twosmoke300]

Ahh , read it wrong sorry .

[fordperv]

I've been working on a "mystery shitter" over the last couple of days and part of the work involved removing the downpipe from the manifold cat. It's one of those arranements where there's a weird fibre "washer" between the two pipes and the whole lot is held togehter with two bolts with springs under them to apply even pressure. Of course, the bolts were rusted to fook and snapped off the nanosecond a modicum of pressure was applied.

 

I ground the remnants of the bolts flush with the cat and tried to drill them out... No luck, so I bit the bullet and took it to my local shite friendly garage to have the bolts drilled out and tapped.

 

"urrgh, might not be possible"... "these always break as soon as you touch them, you should just scrap it, it'll be a pain to sort"

 

I'm sure it's not beyond the wit of man to sort a couple of snapped bolts in a cast iron cat housing. It's right at the bottom of the engine with easy access FFS. The garage should encounter this shit every day. Just get on with it and take my beer tokens!

 

P.S more on the mystery shitpiece soon!

If you have difficulty with the garage speak to Dean at dt metallic, he is a brilliant guy he's a mate of a mate

 

http://www.dtmetallictechnology.co.uk/

[Lankytim]

Cheers for that, although I've just thought that I could just wazz the whole manifold off and take it to work with me. I deal with quite a few engineering firms through work and may be able to get it drilled out or have studs welded on or whatever.

 

P.S I keep driving past your house!

[scaryoldcortina]

A lack of work is making me very grumpy at the moment. The garage trade around here seems to be near dead and there isn't even anything to be made from scrap because of the low price. If I didn't have Dvee8's daimler here I'd have nothing to do at all, and next week all I'm expecting is a polo that needs a shock fitting and a MoT.

 

Anyone in the north east want a car fixing?

[Lacquer Peel]

WilsonWilson will want his ZX in tip-top condition to sell on.

 

Hope things pick up soon, I hated being self-employed for the quiet spells.

[Skizzer]

That's a pisser SOC - if you were anywhere near South Wales I could keep you gainfully employed for weeks. Disco, R16 and SD1 all want MOTs, Jeep needs a cambelt service and a valve unsticking and the XJS has a few jobs to do as well.

 

How much to rent a 5 car transporter?