The grumpy thread

[Sealtainn]

Bren - my 2nd eldest daughter was born with a large hole in the heart which wasn't diagnosed till she was 4 months old, she wouldn't feed properly, was always ill ect and was only 2lbs above her birth weight when she ended up in hospital after it was finally diagnosed. They put her on Infitrini milk - massively high in calories so although she was only taking a couple of ounces at a time, it was enabling her to still grow. She had open heart surgery at 5.5 months old and was only given a 30% chance of survival - she turns 15 in 4 days time.

Hang in there mate, their far more resilient than you think. Thinking of you & sending positive thoughts to you, your family and little one

[doobietoo]

I rarely get nuisance calls these days, I find saying "hold on a minute" and then leaving the phone until they ring off works for all but the most persistent. I have two lines of attack for these. Firstly I bought one of these... http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Acme-thunderer-very-loud-whistle-Would-suit-Footy-referees-/271981065361?hash=item3f5355b491 An acme thunderer whistle

 

I warn them if they don't ring off I am going to hurt their ears.... For the odd one who this doesn't work for I reserve anger.... I once gave a poor unfortunate who wouldn't go away a 15 minute tirade with every swear word I know shouted at full volume. Not only did they not ring again but I felt much better afterwards. Once I have asked them not to call again and they do, I believe I have the right to treat them in any way I please.  

 Unsurprisingly I now get maybe one call every 3 months. 

[HH-R]

I've been desperate to put replace my double glazing, install an orangery and replace my entire kitchen for the past six months, if only someone would ring the house phone at tea time to help.

[HH-R]

I actually tried to use my house phone about a week ago to find that it's completely dead. No idea how long it has even been off. I've done nowt about it, might have a look in six months or so if I can be bothered.

 

Some poor PPIer will be furiously dialling, thinking "WHY WON'T ANYONE PICK UP?!?"

[EssDeeWon]

Same here HH-R my landline is constantly left unplugged, only got it for the broadband anyway.

 

The last time I checked it was me paying for my landline for my use, and not to entertain all these friggin PPI and 'Free' Competition companies so they can keep calling, they'll never get an answer.

[bub2006]

Keys handed in on so called fresh start home. While I was taking what little possession I had in there out the next door neighbour came round asking if I had any weed or anything to sniff. Mmmmm great. To top it all off the clutch has gone in my car tonight. Took me nigh on an hour to walk less than a mile due to my condition. Only another 11 to go till I'm back. I really camt take much more of this shit after these past few week.

[beko1987]

You should ask your neighbor if he has anything to sell...

[bub2006]

I'm on enough drugs as it is mate. It's only the good folk on this forum that raises. Smile these days.

[Craig the Princess]

One more day before going on holiday, getting a cold

[purplebargeken]

Fingers crossed for your lad fella. I was born very, very prematurely and weighed less than a bag of sugar when I was born.

 

Lucky to survive such a prem birth seeing as we are talking 1964 here and a home birth at that.

 

It left me with problems but I am here.

[jakebullet]

I have a hotel room booked with my sweetie for today, and my sodding lip is a bit tingly. I'm going to need my lips. Zovirax tiem and hope it's sore not herpes.

 

Also shitting for England with the fear.

[dugong]

Alarm \ immobiliser is doing my tits in on the MGF. Stupid thing's got one more chance before it gets torn out and left at the side of the road.

[cros]

I tend not to sit down to urinate, but on behalf of those who do I'd like to bemoan the passing of the syphon from the nation's lavatory cisterns. The only thing appropriate about the dump valve, which is rapidly replacing it, is the name. This incontinent device from the continent offers a half flush facility which only renders the contents of the pan less pissy looking. Scientific research has shown that a goodly amount of whazz remains, and most women seem to have a second sense for this, giving the bog a preliminary flush before putting arse to porcelain. So why the fuck have these worthless contraptions been foisted upon us other than to increase the profits of water companies?

[Station]

I have a hotel room booked with my sweetie for today, and my sodding lip is a bit tingly. I'm going to need my lips. Zovirax tiem and hope it's sore not herpes.

 

Also shitting for England with the fear.

Put an ice cube on it for a couple of minutes, it won't turn into a mess on you lip (the virus doesn't like the cold and immediately does one). Licking it does the opposite.

[ruffgeezer]

Put an ice cube on it for a couple of minutes, it won't turn into a mess on you lip (the virus doesn't like the cold and immediately does one). Licking it does the opposite.

Is that for his lips or some sort of kinky play for the nunnie?

[the judge]

I have a hotel room booked with my sweetie for today, and my sodding lip is a bit tingly. I'm going to need my lips. Zovirax tiem and hope it's sore not herpes.

 

Also shitting for England with the fear.

Unlucky!! Cold sores are also known as kissing disease.

 

We know what you've been doooing neh neh!!

[purplebargeken]

Had two twats pull out on me whilst I was negotiating roundabouts today, always at the last minute they decide to 'go for it'. One was an old boy in a Focus. Totally oblivious.

 

Next one who does it will get rammed. Fuck 'em.

[Alan_Green]

CBA scrolling back but a big thank you to the person who suggested telling have-you-been-in-an-accident cold callers "Yes, I was in a big no fault accident but didn't claim. Let me go and get the paperwork so we can discuss how you can help me". Had three of those today. They held on for between 10 to 20 mins. Revenge! 

 

Also told a chugger "I don't like what you are doing" and he seemed to accept it and slunk off. 

[gordonbennet]

I tend not to sit down to urinate, but on behalf of those who do I'd like to bemoan the passing of the syphon from the nation's lavatory cisterns. The only thing appropriate about the dump valve, which is rapidly replacing it, is the name. This incontinent device from the continent offers a half flush facility which only renders the contents of the pan less pissy looking. Scientific research has shown that a goodly amount of whazz remains, and most women seem to have a second sense for this, giving the bog a preliminary flush before putting arse to porcelain. So why the fuck have these worthless contraptions been foisted upon us other than to increase the profits of water companies?

 

Give it time, soon be bloody freezing again and i'll have to sit down for a piss, dunno whether me cock's getting smaller or me gut's getting bigger so giving the former impression, or both.

 

Proper cisterns over your head were the dogs danglies, no matter how bouyant the turd it couldn't fight the flush.

[beko1987]

Lost the shite mojo with the zx recently, although not much has gone wrong tbh. Came home from work, and thought Id have a look at the rear wiper, and the fact that it doesnt work.

 

So I took the motor out, and immediatly noticed the nut had fallen off the main spindle, and the linkage had fallen off.

 

So spent half an hour finding a new nut, greasing the linkage, removing, cleaning and greasing the spindle. Then it all went wrong.

 

Lost the nut that holds the wiper on. Its either in the road, in my toolbox, in the boot somewhere or I put it in the shed. I think I put the linkage on the wrong way as the spindle doesnt turn as well, can change that, but need that fucking nut.

 

One little job, one stupid little job! Will have to look for it on sunday, as apparently im busy tomorrow...

[beko1987]

Damn, thats a good point!

[Noel Tidybeard]

CBA scrolling back but a big thank you to the person who suggested telling have-you-been-in-an-accident cold callers "Yes, I was in a big no fault accident but didn't claim. Let me go and get the paperwork so we can discuss how you can help me". Had three of those today. They held on for between 10 to 20 mins. Revenge! 

 

Also told a chugger "I don't like what you are doing" and he seemed to accept it and slunk off. 

dont forget the "other" car was a yellow convertible with red wings, driven by a young chap who wears a hat (with a bell) his passenger had a bushy beard and big ears and you did report the incident to the police- pc plod

                                                                                                            ----or---

the other vehicle was

• a van driven by Mickey Murphy master baker
• a pick up driven by carpenter Chippy Minton
• the local gp Doctor Mop

and the police officer involved was pc McGarry no452

[cobblers]

It's probably a laugh* winding them up but if you answer the phone at all it's logged and your number is tagged as live, so worth more to sell on. If you lead them on whether they realise you're taking the piss or not, your number will be tagged as "gullible" so worth even more. If you give them obvious abuse then they can easily stick your number on a ton of "MUST CALL" lists too so it's really not worth it - you can call them what you want but if you actually do offend them they could get you called 20 times a day quite easily.

 

If you don't recognise the number, don't answer it. You can get apps to do this if you like. 

 

If it's important you'll get a voicemail, if not then just block the number -  Any response at all to a nuisance call makes things worse.

[Inspector Morose]

Here till 1:30. Then de-rig bus and couple up generator trailer in the pitch black of night and drive down narrow streets back to hotel. On my own.

I'll get to hotel at 2 ish only to find there's nowhere to park the bus so no doubt I'll be woken up at 6:30 by reception asking to move it. That's if I can get into the car park, that is as someone will have parked in such a way that makes it impossible to swing in. Will reception wake them up for me? Like fuck.

 

Still, the bus looks pretty. In pink.

 

[cobblers]

Couldn't you just stick an inflatable mattress in the back and stay where you are? Do deckers still have them drain holes from upstairs that you can do a piss out of?

[Inspector Morose]

Not really an option as I'm at a charity "function" at Stirling castle for the sponsors. Got here at 4 and then forgotten about. No ones offered food, drink or fuck all. Got a kettle so not without caffeine. Typical charity really, look after the benifactors and sod those who do the leg work to make things happen.

Case in point. Inside the castle, at the function, are a good number of volunteers, all of whom have been diagnosed with breast cancer at one time or another. They have been told to go round and sell raffle tickets in between courses and they won't have time to eat until the "guests" have finished their food. They are being paraded around with their pink sashes like some pity show. These are tremendously strong women here and are treated like a side show so the charity can go cap in hand for more money to hire more castles for more charity functions. Just think how much more support for people who really need help the money spent tonight could have provided.

A bit hypocritical, yes as a chunk has been spent hiring the bus I'm driving around but at least that's going to places where there are people who need help.

Gets my goat. Plus I'm tired and rambly.

[dollywobbler]

That sounds bloody awful. I do dislike major charities. More and more, I'm less inclined to support them. Lots of smaller charities out there that don't come out with this sort of tripe. Or employ chuggers.

[dave21478]

It's probably a laugh* winding them up but if you answer the phone at all it's logged and your number is tagged as live, so worth more to sell on. If you lead them on whether they realise you're taking the piss or not, your number will be tagged as "gullible" so worth even more. If you give them obvious abuse then they can easily stick your number on a ton of "MUST CALL" lists too so it's really not worth it - you can call them what you want but if you actually do offend them they could get you called 20 times a day quite easily.

 

If you don't recognise the number, don't answer it. You can get apps to do this if you like. 

 

If it's important you'll get a voicemail, if not then just block the number -  Any response at all to a nuisance call makes things worse.

 

Absolutely.

I think my current plague of daily calls may well stem from me answering to some chap a while back and loudly suggesting that he might want to FROAD, as I was in a rather snarky mood. The volume of calls increased dramatically after that - almost certainly not a coincidence.

[M'coli]

It's probably a laugh* winding them up but if you answer the phone at all it's logged and your number is tagged as live, so worth more to sell on. If you lead them on whether they realise you're taking the piss or not, your number will be tagged as "gullible" so worth even more. If you give them obvious abuse then they can easily stick your number on a ton of "MUST CALL" lists too so it's really not worth it - you can call them what you want but if you actually do offend them they could get you called 20 times a day quite easily.

 

If you don't recognise the number, don't answer it. You can get apps to do this if you like.

 

If it's important you'll get a voicemail, if not then just block the number - Any response at all to a nuisance call makes things worse.

Not so easy to avoid answering when you're hoping it's a call about a job. I usually ask them if they're on about a job, and sack them off if they say no.

 

I don't have the answerphone set up on my mobile for various reasons, mostly because it's shit. I have had my mum leave a message while I've been on another call and voice mail ring me 5 times during that call, but not notify me of another message for 3 days. It's shit.

[The Moog]

Can't register on LPG forum as they have banned gmail accounts due to spam. CBA to set a different provider up just for there....