The grumpy thread

[xtriple]

No paint damage. I've wrung the dent guy I use and left a message - there are others that need his love and attention anyway - so I await his call.

[oldcars]

No paint damage. I've wrung the dent guy I use and left a message - there are others that need his love and attention anyway - so I await his call.

Good stuff. These guys are great. Got a few done on the shuma once, Chap turns up with what looked like a bag full of bbq tongs   Was great to watch and learn how they do it. Took about 6 or so parking dents out.

[Cavcraft]

Gumtree doesn't fail, does it? Someone is taking some pains to explain the reason* for their (hopeless) offers for my bike.

[dave21478]

I dont know what you are all moaning about - you are all just figments of my imagination.

[xtriple]

Does your imagination not moan then?

 

Mines worse than being married!

[NorfolkNWeigh]

Whilst I enjoy the mindless bollocks ( and indeed Mr_bollox) I also feel I'm living the shite life vicariously through the collection,rebuild, repair threads of others more dedicated and committed to the cause.

I own some old shit that needs work, an e30 that could be on the road with a weekends effort and £50, a CLK that hasn't been MOT'd for 2 years for want of me fitting an engine loom that's sitting in the boot. I've never got time, inclination or spare money.

In the last week I've fitted pads to the Rover 600 and Freelander, had some paintwork done on my E-class and I've just bought a secondhand exhaust to fit on the Arosa at the weekend. Non of it remotely interesting and I don't enjoy working on cars so unless it's a necessity I'll avoid it or pay someone else, hence I'm never going to start a worthy thread.

But as I work long hours on my own I see this place as somewhere to exchange banter and bullshit with ( almost) like minded individuals, in much the same way the non socially inept might with workmates.

[chaseracer]

We've seen it all before. 'Autoshite has gone crap/don't know why I bother/not what it was/toys on the floor'

 

A few days later: Ooh, five people have replied to my thread, Autoshite is much better these days.

 

We probably all think we make great posts or threads, but we all have to face tha facts that some of it might be ignored. It's the Internet, not a popularity contest.

 

As with so many things in life, you get out what you put in.

 

I've just changed the rear indicator bulbs on the Blingo.  No pics - soz... 

[chaseracer]

Back on topic, if people are getting annoyed with FS/roffle threads bumping "proper" stuff down the order, maybe it's time to reconsider the option of a separate area for the sale/wanted posts.

 

Given what happened last time I suggested this, I am currently wearing three-layer fireproof hot-pants.  It is not a pretty sight.

[Cavcraft]

I seriously doubt anyone will want the transcript, but my new 'friend' on Gumtree has bitten in pretty EPIC style. I've actually enjoyed exchanging a couple of emails with him and studying his logic*

[scaryoldcortina]

Sorry for being in a bad mood yesterday. Without bothering with the details I've spent most of the week being a taxi driver and a builder's labourer and it was starting to get to me a bit. Cars to fix tomorrow though!

[fairkens]

I seriously doubt anyone will want the transcript, but my new 'friend' on Gumtree has bitten in pretty EPIC style. I've actually enjoyed exchanging a couple of emails with him and studying his logic*

Go on, your gumtree experiences* will brighten up a dull Thursday

[Cavcraft]

Not especially riveting, but here you go.

 

This all started from my advert for my £450 bike...

 

'Hi,
I recently moved in to Oxford, thus started looking around for bike, since it is really convenient to commute here. However, it is relatively difficult to find a good bike here, I have expended my search area and I found your really good bike. Your bike seems to be really good and suitable for a taller person, since I am 6ft7 . Would you think that it could suit me? Thus I would be really interested in it, but the top of my budged is at 270GBP, would you consider selling it for this price? Also, because it would be little bit difficult to pick it up. Kind Regards, M' 

 

Hi, size wise it'd be perfect for you, but there's no chance I'd sell it for £270 because it's really easy for me to send by courier to someone for about £35.

 

'Hey,

I understand your needs, but you know this is life - you buy a new car, and after driving out of the car salon it loses 40% of its value, the same is here where you sell couple years used bike. I understand, that you want to sell it for as high price as possible, but life is different.

I really liked your bike since it has good complectation. Thus I decided to try , maybe you are in a rush to sell it or something, also if you take into the consideration, that winter is coming and sales of the bikes will go down significantly.

Despite that, if you do change your mind, I would be happy to buy it immediately for 280GPB max, let me know. Otherwise good luck!

Kind Regards,

Mindaugas'

 

 

No offence but you are 100% wasting your time time trying to tell me the value of the item I'm selling. I'm am completely aware of depreciation, and cars differ enormously between other makes and models and from cycles. 

I have to question why you have emailed about a £750 bike that's advertised for £450 and only offered £280, or whatever it is. Would you email a bike shop and offer them nearly half of what they want because you think that's fair ? Have you tried emailing a car dealer to see if they'd sell a £4500 car for £2800 because you think that's depreciation? 

You also initiated on your initial questions that you wanted it cheaper because you live far away. Ask yourself this: why on earth would I knock money off because you live miles away? That is surely your problem, not mine? Try it with Tesco if you do online shopping, see what they say. Try asking someone in the top of Scotland selling a second hand fish tank if you can have it cheaper because you live miles away. What do you think they would say?

I don't normally bother replying to silly offers but I'm afraid you've pretty much asked for it. Gumtree and eBay are full of 'experts' who know the price of everything and the value of nothing. A large percentage of people offer money before they've even viewed the item and a large percentage are just chancers. Sadly, I am not one of those people who will sell something at far less than it's value just because someone can't actually afford it. I'd humbly suggest you try and find a £280 bike and offer the seller £280, rather than ask about bikes you clearly can't afford. I'll repeat what I said earlier when I say 'no offence' it's just you're trying it on with someone who isn't interested.Thanks and regards, I genuinely hope you find what you are looking for and wish you luck, there's some right cowboys out there and I hope you get a good bike for a fair price and enjoy your riding, you can't best cycling it's great fun.

Best regards, 

 

 

'To clarify, no offense can be taken, why would I care what you think about me?

You have too much time on your hand, length of the email indicates that. 

All your points are just incorrect:

1. Car and bikes are different ? Yes. So why do you give an example about the cars? So which is it, different or the same (I think that you just confused yourself). It is very simple, I can explain it to you: cars and bikes depreciate the same. However, the value of bike the CAN'T be determined precisely, since there are 3-5 the same bikes sold during the year (even different conditions and so on). However, there are 5000 Ford focus sold at the same time, thus the values are more or less clearly determined. Although people still negotiate, since conditions and many things varies. 

2. Also, I can explain you simple economics. That sellers and buyers have interests in selling/buying stuff. Thus if nobody is buying your stuff in far north in scotland - you will be willing to bring it somewhere closer and sell it, or REDUCE THE PRICE FOR BUYER to get it! Thus, I have asked for it and that is your problem as well if nobody is buying you stuff where you live. 

3. I am so scared after receiving you email, since I asked for it....

4. You are just lunatic, what is wrong with Tesco? They do deliver the stuff for the same price to what ever you live? So, intend to deliver you bike to whatever for the same price? 

5. You are just lunatic, you think is smart to not agree on price, but go and see the bike and afterwards do not agree on price. You are just lunatic, smart people agree on price meet somewhere, buyer inspects the bike and buys it. Or you as a lunatic going around the country and not selling/buying the bike? Lunatic. 

6. As you said, I do not write long email, but you asked for it. 

7. I am confident 95% that I am right and in couple month your asking price will be 280GBP, when I'll offer you 150GBP. 

Please do take my email with offense, as it was intended that way. 

My offer to buy your bike do not stand anymore. 

Kind Regards,

Mindaugas' 

 

 

'Key message - there are about 60-70 new adds per day, and at some point I'll find a bike which I want. Already visited 6 bikes for suitable price for me, but sadly the bikes where too small or condition did not satisfied me.

How many people visited your bike, Mr. Lunatic?

 

I wasn't going to bother replying, but this is actually quite fun. I almost feel a little nasty in a way, after all I was told not to mock the afflicted, and you're quite clearly hard of thinking, and I don't feel sorry.

Ok the: You mentioned 40% of it's value, yet 40% of £750 is £300. £750 minus £350 is Ã‚£400. Not £270, as you first offered. Now then, you're offer represents roughly 33% of the bike's original value.

To use that in car terms (after all, that is what you mentioned) then a new Corsa (just as an example) that is £10,000 is then worth just  Ã‚£3,300 within the first year of ownership. You show me a 2015 Corsa for £3,300 and I'll buy everyone out there that I can.

 

I won't even bother trying to work out how a mountain bike is worth less in winter, that's the sort of 'logic' only someone as deluded as you can come up, all because you seem to think you're featuring on an episode of The Apprentice, or Bargain Hunt, or some such nonsense. You have clearly watched too much television and think the best way to deal with people or grab a bargain is by making stupid, indeed laughable offers for items in the hope the seller is desperate or stupid. Unfortunately for you I am neither.

Your theory about sellers reducing stuff because they live far away is brilliant, you should start comedy writing or something because it truly is funny. I love the way you have thought this through for all of about 11 seconds, and the fact you live in what must arguably be one of the easiest places in Britain to buy a bike, thus having a massive market on your door step makes your comments even more ridiculous. HOWEVER...it clearly tells it's own tale: You cannot buy a decent bike in your city because you haven't got enough money, it really is that simple.

 

For someone who doesn't care what you think I think of you (or whatever nonsense it was you typed) that was a remarkably long reply. Just take it on the chin, you tried to make a stupid offer because you haven't got the money and your offer was rejected. If every thing you said was correct, then by Christmas I'll be sat next to a pile of rusty, worthless metal, crying myself to sleep because I didn't accept a hopelessly low offer from an internet troll, who couldn't afford it anyhow. If this wasn't true you wouldn't have replied, so you can sit there safe in the knowledge that you're the leading internet price king and you haven't come across as a skint troll at all.

 

You're clearly incapable of rational thinking, so I'll try and sum it up in one sentence for you.

 

YOU CANNOT AFFORD THIS BIKE.

 

You are just a lunatic :D 

All my office just read your email, and we could not stop laughing.

Sorry, I have a life to live, I hope will get one as well. 

Mr. Lunatic Billy: "there are about 60-70 new adds per day, and at some point I'll find a bike which I want. Already visited 6 bikes for suitable price for me, but sadly the bikes where too small or condition did not satisfied me. How many people visited your bike, Mr. Lunatic?"

Since we disagree, one of us must be wrong. That's fair? I already found 6 people who were selling they bikes, priced new at 1000GBP, at 300GBP or lower. There are still couple in negotiation. Hmm, me and these people are stupid as you say. Ok. Currently, I am studying at University of Oxford. Hmm where did you study?  Thus I think the point who is stupid proven. 

Sad thing, that you wont understand that you total dummy, who is selling his bike at 300GBP loss - what a pathetic loser. While, I will buy a used bike for good price and will brake even after couple years. Who is the loser!!

Mr. Hillbilly, good luck . 

Sorry, I have a life to live, I hope will get one as well, could not continue.' 

 

YOU CANNOT AFFORD THIS BIKE

 

 

'Key message - there are about 60-70 new adds per day, and at some point I'll find a bike which I want. Already visited 6 bikes for suitable price for me, but sadly the bikes where too small or condition did not satisfied me. How many people visited your bike, Mr. Lunatic?'

 

 

 

 

'This is what happens, then a teenage boy has sex with a cousin - Mr. billy, Hillbilly '

 

 

 

 

 

 

(All a bit TL:DR, sorry.)

[dollywobbler]

What a pillock. (not that Pillock)

[outlaw118]

Lunatic v Knob Warbler

[Bobthebeard]

From Wikipedia

 

"Mindaugas (German: Myndowen, Latin: Mindowe, Belarusian: Üіýôþўó, MindoÅ­h, ca. 1203 – fall 1263) was the first known Grand Duke of Lithuania and the only King of Lithuania. Little is known of his origins, early life, or rise to power; he is mentioned in a 1219 treaty as an elder duke, and in 1236 as the leader of all the Lithuanians. The contemporary and modern sources discussing his ascent mention strategic marriages along with banishment or murder of his rivals."

 

Why would the ghost of the only King of Lithuania want a bike?

[mercrocker]

^^Given he claims to be 6ft 7 shouldn't he be Mindyer'ead?   I pissed myself reading that email exchange, might even Ebay a phantom large framed cycle claiming to be near Oxford.....

[michael1703]

The truth is we would rather read this sort of post than look at pictures of retro cars taken under shonky street lights with Vaseline smeared over the lens, hence why the photo threads don't get the traffic

[HH-R]

Tell him you've given it to a charity shop to avoid all the gumtree/ebay hassle.

[Lankytim]

Or tell him he can have it for £150 and when he arrives say you've just sold it.

[AnthonyG]

Modern cars really are dreadful. And why do they all have to look so angry?

 

Also, the Dacia Sandero Access must be the only new car on the market that uses sensibly sized/profiled tyres.

If you read modern car magazines you'll discover that 'aggressive' front ends are looked upon favourably by the muttering rotters. The Krauts are, as usual, in the forefront of this.

[MrDuke]

If you read modern car magazines you'll discover that 'aggressive' front ends are looked upon favourably by the muttering rotters. The Krauts are, as usual, in the forefront of this.

 

They're probably the same people who put bad-boy bonnets or headlight-brows on their Corsas and Astras back in the day. Instead of looking back at their youth with a wry smile, they're still trying to live as much of it as possible while holding down an office job and a mortgage.

[fred]

I think we need a cup of tea and this

 

''Smile while your heart is aching.....Smile while your masturbating'' - No thats not right....

 

[AlabamaShrimp]

My mum rung me tonight. Said they'd been burgled today while they were out.

 

Had to happen sometime as they live in the middle of nowhere and haven't had a door lock since 1987. They did used to have dogs though...

 

Just jewellery taken. None of it worth sod all just the age and significance that's the upsetting part. I've asked them to move so many time over the last few years as my dad's been getting dementia but it's always been a no. As bad as this is for them maybe they'll finally move.

 

It's the house my dad always wanted but this and other stuff is slowly killing them yet they're stubborn and like all old people don't want to change

[MrDuke]

I think we need a cup of tea and this

 

''Smile while your heart is aching.....Smile while your masturbating'' - No thats not right....

 

Ah yes, the 'frogeye' sprite - duly succeeded by the 'vinegar-stroke' midget.

[sheffcortinacentre]

i'd have thought he wants to study English before he gets cared away with more up scale education.

[rml2345]

Aye, it's a bit strong being called a lunatic by someone who offers £280 on a £450 bike that cost £750 new because it's further away than he would have liked. 
I was going to write a grump about the grumpy thread having moved but I suppose it's sensible.
And I found a packet of biscuits in the cupboard so they sort of cancel out. 

[Cavcraft]

Or tell him he can have it for £150 and when he arrives say you've just sold it.

 

 

Mr Oxford Education doesn't want to buy it now. Which is handy, as Mr Shi T. Education doesn't want to sell it to him. One day, I swear to God the angle grinder is coming out and I'll get someone to video me making a pile of sharp bits of metal and I'll post it to the fuckers free of charge.

[garbaldy]

If that email displays the standard of an Oxford education then I'm glad I'm a pauper,

[MarvinsMom]

the owners of the blast furnace at redcar sound like they are going bust.

 

production will end today, or paused in SSI's words, and the layoffs have already started.

 

most of the 2000 workers will be gone by Monday, with god knows how many others will loose out when the plant shuts.

 

the owners though have given it a good go, I cannot take anything away from that. they and the workforce have tried their damnedest to make it pay, cheap rubbish from china though and a falling steel price have made it inevitable.

 

doesn't make the closure any easier though.

 

very sad for all those involved.

[ruffgeezer]

WARNING: ONE MAN'S POTENTIAL ANEURYSM AHEAD!

 

Firstly, fucking printers. There are 5 printers at Ruff towers, one an inkless mess, one homespec laser printer with a knackered fuser, one antique and two bastardcuntyfuckstick HP printers that need a shitload of bloatware to be installed an then still won't fucking work. Shit off you bastards I bought your crappy printer just let me use the poxy thing without assimilating my computer to do so you fat fingered cock sniffers.

 

Other garages. Do your fucking jobs properly or go be a fucking bin man or something.

 

Micro USB. Broken fluffy crap.

 

Oh and since I've finshed my 306 cab today from the nice morning it was, it is now pissing it down.