The grumpy thread

[Negative Creep]

The moment you drive out of the fitting bay you're running on used tyres

[wuvvum]

Don't forget that when it's been as sunny as it has and there's been no rain for ages, the day the wet stuff comes the roads are naturally more slippy than normal anyhow.

This.  I had a powerslide out of the Honda scooter earlier in the week, when we'd just had a brief downpour on previously hot, dry roads.  Not what I expected from 125cc.  And it's got Metzeler tyres on it too, not some cheap Chinese shit.

[saucedoctor]

I had a Metzeler rear tyre on my TZR250, and it was horrible. Changed it for a Michelin and the bike's handling was transformed.

[AlabamaShrimp]

Cheap Chinese shit for me all the way! Tbh they are an odd size apparently so I have to take what I can get

 

 

Edit

Someone don't ask what they are as I've no idea and am far too lazy to look

[xtriple]

the insight has got 'eco' tyres on it. Narrow things as well, they grip fine in the dry but not had any rain since I got it so no idea about that, but, I have never heard so much road noise... the car is silent but the roar is fookin' deafening!

[twosmoke300]

That's a Honda thing . They all seem to suffer with road noise.

[Wilko220]

Morning of tinkering with the Humber severely curtailed by some dickhead taxi driver blocking my lock-up. CHEERS.

 

Did make some progress towards getting the thing going again though, so a big thanks to Purplebargeken for popping over and unleashing his under-the-bonnet skillz on me...

[purplebargeken]

At least Mr. C - the taxi driving parking-wanker left enough space to get the garage door open. I don't even get that at times. Things really are different in St. Albans

 

She will be running soon enough Ben, at least we finished what we set out to do.

 

That Citroen van is pure Autoshite class!

 

Bastard taxi driver (back to grump mode)!

[steve_earwig]

Reading all this "used tyres are shit" stuff (honestly, it's like two old ladies at the market fighting over the biggest cucumber), I don't think I've seen anyone mention age - tyres degrade over time, also things like sun or UV light and even rain can make them degrade faster. One thing I keep thinking is, when you're buying tyres from evilbay, as well as how much (or little) tread they have, you should also ask how old they are. I know over here you can get cheap "new" tyres that are pensioners, the winters I got with the yoyo, which the guy had just had fitted, turned out to have been made in 2001 - that's 3 years older than the car!!
 
Old tyres start to crack up because the rubber is turning back into plastic and the grip will start to trail off to zero, especially in the wet. Nobody seems to be actually sure how old is too old, but it's something like 4 to 6 years (!). I have also noticed some tyres age faster than others, noticeably Michelins.
 
On the sidewalls there should be a date code, it's usually in a lozenge-shaped casting mark amongst all the meaningless printing and it'll say something like e.g. "0311" which is March 2011. It's also something to look out for even if you've jizzed up (nice expression!) for a set of Bridgelops or whatever, check the dates before they fit them on, if you're lucky they'll only be a couple of months old, if not they might be fobbing you off with old stock. Not something to worry about if you do mega miles but if your heap only goes to the shops and back you might want to pay more attention.
 
[/soapbox]
And I only found all this out after I'd jizzed up a small fortune for a set of Michelins for a car I seldom drive

[HH-R]

Damn Panda wouldn't start this morning, now the EML is on.

 

This bloke put it better than I ever could:

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TuMHpOKDLdU

[dave21478]

wtf does he expect to happen, grinding on and on with the starter motor?

[HH-R]

Aye, I wouldn't be doing that!

[Parky]

Fiat Dealers! Keep your dealerships spotlessly clean using this one key trick - treat your customer concerns with disdain, dismiss any complaints with a simple "they all do that" or "you are driving it wrong"' and hey presto! All those pesky people wanting to give you their money will disappear!

 

Wifes Fiat 500 twinair ( cracking wee thing it must be said) misfired on Friday on her way home. I tried it out and whilst it works ok in normal driving, if you need to boot it, such as merging onto a motorway, it judders and misfires. Various lights come on but it still works ok-ish. Handbook doesn't indicate anything other than fuel injection fault - no mention of do not drive it or get it to the dealer ASAP.

 

A quick google reveals coil pack failures do happen which trigger my exact problem. There was a recall for it but nobody told me so today I tried to arrange to get it looked at. I won't mention names at this point....

 

Dealer 1 - cant look at it until 12th August. Never seen a coil pack failure, they last the life of the car. If the car is misfiring you are driving it too hard (3500rpm in third?) and all of the twinairs do that, it's a safety thing to stop you going too fast. Hahahahahahahaha!. No, no recall ever issued by Fiat for coil pack issues EVER!

 

Dealer 2 - mmmm, sounds like coil pack, we have seen a few of them coming in (part of the same group as dealer 1 incidentally). Don't drive the car under any circumstances, you will ruin the cat. How do I get the car to you then? Not our problem, can a friend tow you? Shall we book you in for Late August? Click brrrrrrrrrrer

 

Dealer 3 - yes there is a recall for coils, no yours isn't affected as your car has the good ones (?). By the way have you had that safety critical ABS failure recall that affects your car? No? You should have had that 10 months ago. WTF?

 

Fiat Customer Service - no coil recalls ever issued. No, we won't check the numbers you have. No there are no recalls on your car apart from the dash wiring that needs to be replaced. You haven't been told? Oh dear. No I can't explain why not. No there is no ABS recall on yours, your car doesn't have ABS. Really? Well according to the spec for your car ABS wasn't fitted. No we won't tow you to a dealer as your car still works. Yes you will destroy the cat if you drive it. No, it's your car, it's your responsibility and the warranty won't cover recovery. Yes, best thing to do is take it out, trigger the fault, and we will then recover you from the side of the road but if the cat is ruined as a result that's your problem.

 

Dealer 4 - yes, there was a recall and yes your car is affected and the supplying dealer should have informed you. We apologise on their behalf. We are aware of the issue and we will make space Friday to fix the car as we are disappointed at the treatment you have had. Courtesy car no problem. In fact it is due a 2 year service, we will do that at the same time at a discounted rate and clean the car too. Please once again accept our apologies.

 

So thumbs up Ancaster Fiat in Bexley, by being the only Fiat rep who gave a shit you have won all future servicing and sales should Wifey upgrade in future. As for the rest of you lying shits, kiss goodbye to my custom and also my money. You only had to pretend to care in order to placate me you know!

[Sloth in a bowl]

^ Wouldn't that make it a gingerbread automaton? Rise of the gingerbread cybermen!

Rise of the gingerbread cyberpeople surely, unless their running wi-Fi on a dongle

[Sloth in a bowl]

Fiat Dealers! Keep your dealerships spotlessly clean using this one key trick - treat your customer concerns with disdain, dismiss any complaints with a simple "they all do that" or "you are driving it wrong"' and hey presto! All those pesky people wanting to give you their money will disappear!

 

Wifes Fiat 500 twinair ( cracking wee thing it must be said) misfired on Friday on her way home. I tried it out and whilst it works ok in normal driving, if you need to boot it, such as merging onto a motorway, it judders and misfires. Various lights come on but it still works ok-ish. Handbook doesn't indicate anything other than fuel injection fault - no mention of do not drive it or get it to the dealer ASAP.

 

A quick google reveals coil pack failures do happen which trigger my exact problem. There was a recall for it but nobody told me so today I tried to arrange to get it looked at. I won't mention names at this point....

 

Dealer 1 - cant look at it until 12th August. Never seen a coil pack failure, they last the life of the car. If the car is misfiring you are driving it too hard (3500rpm in third?) and all of the twinairs do that, it's a safety thing to stop you going too fast. Hahahahahahahaha!. No, no recall ever issued by Fiat for coil pack issues EVER!

 

Dealer 2 - mmmm, sounds like coil pack, we have seen a few of them coming in (part of the same group as dealer 1 incidentally). Don't drive the car under any circumstances, you will ruin the cat. How do I get the car to you then? Not our problem, can a friend tow you? Shall we book you in for Late August? Click brrrrrrrrrrer

 

Dealer 3 - yes there is a recall for coils, no yours isn't affected as your car has the good ones (?). By the way have you had that safety critical ABS failure recall that affects your car? No? You should have had that 10 months ago. WTF?

 

Fiat Customer Service - no coil recalls ever issued. No, we won't check the numbers you have. No there are no recalls on your car apart from the dash wiring that needs to be replaced. You haven't been told? Oh dear. No I can't explain why not. No there is no ABS recall on yours, your car doesn't have ABS. Really? Well according to the spec for your car ABS wasn't fitted. No we won't tow you to a dealer as your car still works. Yes you will destroy the cat if you drive it. No, it's your car, it's your responsibility and the warranty won't cover recovery. Yes, best thing to do is take it out, trigger the fault, and we will then recover you from the side of the road but if the cat is ruined as a result that's your problem.

 

Dealer 4 - yes, there was a recall and yes your car is affected and the supplying dealer should have informed you. We apologise on their behalf. We are aware of the issue and we will make space Friday to fix the car as we are disappointed at the treatment you have had. Courtesy car no problem. In fact it is due a 2 year service, we will do that at the same time at a discounted rate and clean the car too. Please once again accept our apologies.

 

So thumbs up Ancaster Fiat in Bexley, by being the only Fiat rep who gave a shit you have won all future servicing and sales should Wifey upgrade in future. As for the rest of you lying shits, kiss goodbye to my custom and also my money. You only had to pretend to care in order to placate me you know!

Now print that out and send it to all 4 dealers and Fiat UK then see if any of them throw some free stuff at you or even just a basic apology.

 

Dealers live and die by customer service as it is so easy to find an alternative, it is surprising how few understand this.

[Junkman]

Dealers live and die by selling finance schemes, it is surprising how few understand this.

 

EFA

[dugong]

Now print that out and send it to all 4 dealers and Fiat UK then see if any of them throw some free stuff at you or even just a basic apology.

 

Dealers live and die by customer service as it is so easy to find an alternative, it is surprising how few understand this.

Put it all over their social media sites, too. You will get a response quickly because of the speed in which everything moves.

[Parky]

I would complain to Fiat UK but they were the worst of the lot. All I want to know is can they fix my car quickly and perhaps, if its not too much trouble tell me which recalls my car is subject to, particularly safety related ones!

 

Might get this onto Twitter, that usually shits them up.

 

As for free stuff from the dealers, I wouldn't trust most of them to top up the screen wash without dumping brake fluid in the reservoir instead

 

They are also obsessed with Selenia oil! They munt on about how it's the greatest stuff, and based on authentic tears of Mussolini blended with Nectar of the gods but they still use a big black drum in the corner with Chevron 5/30 written on it. When I get it serviced next I am going to watch them like hawks and the second I see the black drum wheeled out I will let the service receptionist know that I do not expect to see Selenia on my bill......

[Junkman]

It's Monday.

[warren t claim]

Attention all women shopping in Morrison's. Why not spend your money at Weight Watchers rather than on tacky body "art" tattoos?

[warren t claim]

 

This a typical swamp donkey. She is even proudly displaying her Wigan tattoo.

[AlabamaShrimp]

Arseholes! Ordered a radiator last night that I thought was very cheap at about £31. Just got 2 emails. It's not in stock but they can get one but it will be another £7.77.

 

Haven't decided to get it, ask for discount or tell them no as I can get it about £3 cheaper but of course they might not have it in stock (now I sound proper tight)

[Bren]

Attention all women shopping in Morrison's. Why not spend your money at Weight Watchers rather than on tacky body "art" tattoos?

Its a distraction technique - you look at the tattoo and fail to notice the rest of the munter it is attached to.

 

Face tattoo's may be the future.

[hennabm]

I have a theory that the ugly and/or fat bird is guaranteed to have a tat somewhere on display.

 

Somehow they must think that the tat now makes them look attractive

[RedSparrow]

Hmm. A female friend of mine who is quite overweight fits this category.

She has 2 kids and is divorced.

Her facebook posts alternate between 'I am so broke, no money for kid's school uniform, why is it so expensive?!! ', 'Out on the piss with my girlies tonite1!!!' and 'getting new tattoo tomorrow - can't wait!'

She fails to see the connection.

[Parky]

I know it's not the shiteists way, but I am very fussy on tyres, ages and brands. Mainly because if I ever have to do an emergency stop in the wet to avoid a nun with a basket of kittens I like to know that if it should go pear shaped, provided my car is legal, I am sober, the brakes are tip top and the tyres are good I cannot do anything more.

 

I would hate to hit someone knowing that a set of Uniroyals instead of Ditchfinders would / could have avoided the accident. It's a small price to pay for a cleaner conscience. But that's just me, always worrying about others.

[xtriple]

I've just found out when reversing sensor go to a solid tone they mean, 'STOP NOW!'

 

Unfortunately, I didn't....

[NorfolkNWeigh]

Regarding shit tyres, I bought a set of 17" alloys and tyres off ebay for Mrs N's S-Type a few years ago. Tyres were like new ,result,I thought . Luckily I happened to be driving it the first time it rained!

It was like driving on snow, not just the rear breaking away , full on four wheel drifts across roundabouts , by the time I'd got home I was left foot braking and provoking oversteer like a Scandanavian rally god* ( in my head) ,because under steer in a big heavey rwd car frightens the shit out of me.

Needless to say they came off and went on the wheel pile in the garden pretty smartish. Fast forward to about two months ago, my mate Dave picks up an S-Type for a couple of hundred quid as a daily runaround.'The tyres are all bald,haven't you got some in your garden?' He asks . ' Yes,but they're fuckin' lethal ' I tell him. I give them to him anyway. Next day he's on the phone,'those tyres are fuckin lethal.i thought you were joking!'

This from a man that's got rock hard 25 year old Dunlops on his 3 door Cossie , and thinks they're perfectly acceptable.

[Skizzer]

I've just found out when reversing sensor go to a solid tone they mean, 'STOP NOW!'

 

Unfortunately, I didn't....

 

Reversing sensor?!

 

Intruder alert!  Intruder alert!

 

 

 

 

 

(Just kidding.  Sorry for your loss.)

[Lankytim]

I find used tyres are worn to match the car they came from and are always a bit slippy until they wear in a bit on the new car. They seem to be noisy during this time too.