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The grumpy thread


outlaw118

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Cars that made Britain Great, a Programme that makes TV Shit. I watched a succession of know-nothing 'guests' call series Landrovers 'Defenders'. Then the presenter tried to drive an early series 1 and proved to be completely incapable of changing gear. Quentin Wilson claimed that he'd driven his leaf sprung model at 125 mph, and I wish that it was true as that would mean that he'd gone over a cliff and was speaking through a medium.

When they started menstruating over a Triumph Spitfire I couldn't endure any more and was compelled to snip through the tv's mains lead with a pair of scissors.

 

I have an irrational hatred of Q Wilson Esq.....................that series he did with the lanky posh bird and the bespectacled idiot was some of the most toe curlingly awful motoring journalism I've ever seen..................

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Mr Wilson's '125' mph landrover came with a 91 bhp V8 and a factory quoted top speed of 80mph. He threw away an inlet manifolf restrictor which would still only get him 114 bhp and completely exhaust his technical abilities. His performance claims are as ludicrous as the product he endorses, a reconditioned engine in a bottle.

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Mr Wilson's '125' mph landrover came with a 91 bhp V8 and a factory quoted top speed of 80mph. He threw away an inlet manifolf restrictor which would still only get him 114 bhp and completely exhaust his technical abilities. His performance claims are as ludicrous as the product he endorses, a reconditioned engine in a bottle.

Remember we are talking a land rover here so the speedo needle would have been bouncing between 80 and 125 and no self respecting yoof would choose the lower number.

The programme was still shit though.

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I tried watching it. I was incensed by inaccuracies before the titles had even finished. Utter crap. Once Quent appeared, I turned it off. Remember, he was a used car salesman. Making stuff up comes naturally to him.

Detained at her Madge's pleasure for automotive haircuts as well................

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Echo all of the above re Mr Wilson: what a complete prick that man is. 125 mph! Laughable. Also, all the idiots going on about 'Defenders' when it's a series 1/11 etc.

 

But, at 3:00 am this morning there was nothing else to watch!

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I don't like people calling any of them Defenders. It's not a Defender, it's a Land Rover. Just because the company got confused about what they were selling doesn't mean the rest of us have to follow suit.

No no no they are all Jeeps !! Or at least that is what everyone used to call my series one years ago. It really used to piss me off back then but I just can't be bothered now.

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Cars that made Britain Great, a Programme that makes TV Shit. I watched a succession of know-nothing 'guests' call series Landrovers 'Defenders'. Then the presenter tried to drive an early series 1 and proved to be completely incapable of changing gear. Quentin Wilson claimed that he'd driven his leaf sprung model at 125 mph, and I wish that it was true as that would mean that he'd gone over a cliff and was speaking through a medium.

When they started menstruating over a Triumph Spitfire I couldn't endure any more and was compelled to snip through the tv's mains lead with a pair of scissors.

bet it was D701SWL

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Quentin Wilsons used his voice on Road Angel Speed camera detectors. They were pretty crap TBH

 

I used to sell them at Halfords years ago, and we'd get loads of them returned. A common fault was that they used to just power themselves on an off on their own.

In the warehouse with a dozen or so knackered ones in it, all going on and off on their own. The thing is, whenever they powered up they'd play Quentin's voice saying "ROAD ANGEL". So about every couple of minutes you'd hear "ROAD ANGEL" coming out of this cupboard. They'd spookily sync up like furbies sometimes and you'd get about 5 doing it at once like a chorus.

 

If you put the box in the microwave for two seconds it would stop them doing it. Or anything.

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dad used to have road angels, and whilst they seemed good when they worked, he had one crash and just cycled shouting ro ro to ro ro ro ro Road ange ro ro ro to until he pulled over and put it in the boot (couldn't pull the battery)

 

the other thing that annoyed me about it is 'warning, accident blackspot ahead and then the fucking loudest beep beep beep beep beep beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep. said blacks pot had been put on the database 16 years ago, had a roundabout put in, re graded etc but warning, accident black spot ahead. I'd rather just stick to the speed limit or open my eyes. he got his when he was on 9 points or summat

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My nans was like that, she just kept using it and didn't realise it was 100% completely blocked, for months. 

Anyway then she went out and spend fuckin £300 on a Dyson v6 battery powered jobbie. When I went round to set it up for her, I tested it out and completely filled the bucket in ten seconds use.

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Just followed someone in a newish saab n/s rear tyre was completely flat when I came up behind them, thought they were driving a bit irratically, they carried on down a dual carriageway at upto 55mph and round several roundabouts before pulling into a hotel guests enterance. Tyre was smoking when I eventually plucked up the courage to pull out and pass them as they turned off. I could here it from behind with the window down so there was no way the driver could have missed it...Why carry on and risk loosing control it's not like they were limping it home at 2mph.

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Halfords. Went in to get a brake bulb and a reg plate bulb for the i10. Tapped in the reg number and out spat a few options.

 

Bought the bulbs, eventually got home. Opened the pack with the brake light bulbs, took off the old one. Totally different.

 

Pulled out the reg plate bulb. Also totally different.

 

Why is everything so difficult.

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Apologies for kicking you while you're down Ken, but why not pull them out first then take them into the shop to match up?

 

As number plate lights are usually those little 5W jobs, I just buy 10 at a time from eBay for 99p delivered. Damn useful to have a stock as the other one in the pair will usually go shortly after.

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Re The Cars that Made Britain Great....

 

I got approached by the production company for that back in January. Gave us a massive list of all the cars they wanted models for and could we source them. They reckoned it'd be nice to have the celebs looking wistfully at the model while they regurgitated something an intern had found on Wikipedia. They also ought it'd be nice if the celeb could. Keep the model afterwards.

 

So anyway we could source most of them so gave them a quote (a very reasonable one it must be said) to which they replied that sorry they didn't have a budget but could we do it for free and they'd give us a mention on the losing credits.

 

Mere nanoseconds passed before I gave my verdict. The lack of celebs holding models and the fact we aren't on the credits tells you all you need to know.

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Grump #1  Bag of plastic wheelarch trim clips from eBay are completely useless: dimensionally identical to Ford ones but rigid so won't work.  Excess force produced by evil temper shatters them.

 

Grump #2  Pattern bumper end caps and mudflaps are completely useless because they are only approximately the right shape and the design requires that they be exactly the right shape. In all 3 dimensions. And made of the correct material, not pastry or recycled pop bottle.

 

Grump #3  Tried to buy a fancy telly today in Currys. Decided what I wanted and lo, there it was on display. Looked really nice but  "ooh you don't want one of those" says the serving lass "Panasonic have decided not to support the operating system anymore, so in a couple of years none of the online features will work"

So I still don't have a proper youtube telly.

 

 

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Internet failed again halfway through Dirt Every Day. *shakes fist* 

 

I reckon our exchange has flooded again. This has happened before. Of course, a sensible company would investigate why its exchange gets flooded and do something about it. Sadly, this is BT Openreach...

 

Working for now. It'd better behaving during strictly or I'll get really, really cross. I might even have to write a letter.

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