The grumpy thread

[tooSavvy]

Spiny - RANT WARNING >>> melded with SPEED AWARENESS COURSE knobbing.....

 

.... had we thwacked the old bird (Sweede or Kraut Waagenn) and high[er]speed had been part of the equation...OooF!!

 

 my head is only now deflating from beinn filled with all this naughtieness/imagerry.

 

 

TS

[Cheggers]

Spiny - RANT WARNING >>> melded with SPEED AWARENESS COURSE knobbing.....

 

.... had we thwacked the old bird (Sweede or Kraut Waagenn) and high[er]speed had been part of the equation...OooF!!

 

my head is only now deflating from beinn filled with all this naughtieness/imagerry.

 

 

TS

 

Sorry fella, that's just a bunch of letters

 

 

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[chaseracer]

My old Seicento's spare, which had a 60kph sticker on it, was the same size as the standard tyre/wheel.

I still get some enjoyment from the fact that many 'spacesaver' tyres are larger than the rubber on my Dyane.

[vulgalour]

After a surprisingy bouyant December, I've had zero income for January.  I've got Stuff to throw money at, January being its usual rubbish self is not helping right now.

[Conrad D. Conelrad]

I just watched an advert on Youtube for British Gas landlord services because the guy presenting it kept pronouncing the word as "Landslord". I kept watching to see if he was going to do it every time. I wonder if that was a very clever way to make people watch the ad or if British Gas genuinely found an actor who seriously could not pronounce the word landlord and then cast him in their landlord advert. 

 

"we know it can be tough being a landslord..."

 

edit: and he's not saying it like land's lord, he's saying land slord

[dollywobbler]

Like that Speed thing on BBC2 recently. I only caught a snippet, but I think 'Harry' Vatenen did very well not to get upset with his name being all wrong. Every time.

[RedSparrow]

Just when I think people couldn't get any stupider I hear on the radio that the local police have had to make an official announcement because there's a rumour doing the rounds that dialling 999 and hanging up will somehow make your phone battery last longer Honestly, I really do despair at the sheer mind-numbing idiocy of much of our society.

 

Oh for fucks sake.

Punishment for this should be an automatic £1000 fine and sterilisation.

[MrDuke]

Oh for fucks sake.

Punishment for this should be an automatic £1000 fine and a .22 to the temple.

 

FTFY

[Rocket88]

Me and either half have reached a parting of the ways.....after 16 years. Not sure if I'm pissed off or relieved.

[Mr Livered]

I bet there's a bit of both after 16 years mate. Take it easy, hope you're okay.

[Rocket88]

Bit of a culture shock at 56, I can tell you! As much my fault as hers, we've reached the stage of being excessively polite to each other..................

[oman5]

at least you are talking. my folks stopped talking from 1985 until 1997 when they finally divorced when my younger brother turned 18. it was pathetic.

I recommend buying more shite to cheer yourself up and take your mind off things.

[Lord Sterling]

Shit this man. Today I took the Micra out simply for a quick wash and spin. No sooner had I pulled out (safely) on the main road had I encountered a van who decided to try and have a go by tailgating me. At the roundabout twatty van driver didn't like me flexing the wanker sign at him. He reversed to which I asked him what his problem was, he stated that I shouldn't have pulled out, we exchanged obcenities for a bit and both drove off. Seems everytime I take the Micra out some sad twat wants to have a go.

 

Football kid twats on my road are still obsessed with playing football wherever and whenever they can. It's bloody cold and dark and they still insist on playing fucking football next to peoples cars.

 

I need to get the fuck out of this street.

[saucedoctor]

^ get a car video camera, Mo. I'm looking at rear-facing cameras as I am SERIOUSLY pissed off with people tailgating me when I'm driving the Rover, or Jas' Golf.

[Cavcraft]

Can you invite some mates round for a late night game of pissed up cricket? If you happen to accidentally* end up smashing one of their windows that'd be a shame. 

[fordperv]

mo i think its the fact your driving a micra the knuckle dragging mouth breathers think oh he must be an easy target because he drives a small car, take a deep breath and feel safe in the knowledge that karma bites these people in the arse very hard eventually, when they do it to the wrong type of person if you understand my thinking.

[saucedoctor]

^ he's right, and I've seen it happen. It's a laugh!

[Junkman]

A big car bullying a small car, what else is new?

I already notice this when driving my new Colt, let alone a Micra. It's like driving under an invisibility cloak, you just don't exist for Teutonic 11-plate shit.

I mean, I can understand it to an extend, the way this newfangled tosh is designed they probably really can't see bugger all.

However, it's even worse when driving a hearing aid beige 1970 2000TC. Although your existence - contrary to when driving a Colt - is clearly recognised, you must be outrun and cut off at all cost.

I'm more and more in favour of the sawed-off shotgun solution, me.

[Brent_Crude]

This was part of the rationale for buying the old Range Rover - prior to that, we relied on the wife's little 206 for a while, which was a big shock for me after years of joyful Alfa 166 ownership. The lack of respect from other road users (abusers) towards the little Pug was not just annoying but a danger to us at times. Funnily enough, that nonsense came to an abrupt stop the moment we got the old Rangie and no selfish, mouth breathing fuckers have trouble us since. Well, actually some scumbag in a Golf GTI tried to once and he got schooled. It shouldn't be this way, but fact is, a big bastard old motor is insurance against the sort of tossers you encountered in your Micra today, Lord_Sterling.

 

Pa_Crude always liked old Saab 900's for a similar reason... those massive bumpers were a big deterrent

 

 

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[dugong]

'Is that OK mate?'

No. It's not OK. 

And you're not my mate, OK? Mate?

[warren t claim]

mo i think its the fact your driving a micra the knuckle dragging mouth breathers think oh he must be an easy target because he drives a small car, take a deep breath and feel safe in the knowledge that karma bites these people in the arse very hard eventually, when they do it to the wrong type of person if you understand my thinking.

I've owned a few small cars recently and I've never encountered this problem. I must be lucky.

[warren t claim]

'Is that OK mate?'

 

No. It's not OK. 

 

And you're not my mate, OK? Mate?

Er... Are you OK mate?

[Brent_Crude]

'Is that OK mate?'

 

No. It's not OK.

 

And you're not my mate, OK? Mate?

 

 

 

 

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[Junkman]

Er... Are you OK mate?

 

Nah, he is in Grater Manchester.

 

Whereas in the rest of England, when you for example buy something, it's "that'll be X £, please", in Manchester it's "that's X £, mate".

[dugong]

Aaaand Facebook can sod off for a while. 

[greengartside]

Re: tailgating in small cars.

 

Just had this again myself tonight, driving SWMBO's Micra. Twat in a Mundano estate nearly crawling into my boot most of the way home from work, then coming off a roundabout decides if he could fit his front end in my boot. Luckily he braked before smashing into the back, but fuck me, is it really necessary? It seems like if you have anything less than a stupid fucking diesel BMW, Merc or Mondeo/Insignia then you're worth the square root of fuck all on the roads. I really fucking despair.

[fordperv]

this frigging great british weather is peeing me right off, ive got a week off work and would love to get outside and attempt to do the work required to finish one of my cars so i can fire it to the body shop and what do i get .... rain rain and more fecking rain seeming as the work i need to do is a bit of welding i dont think its wise i carry on regardless lol, the only bit of constructive work ive actually got done up to yet was pop around to my parents to strip the carb on my capri and clean it up as it was filling the carb body up with fuel, that didnt take long but at least it was purring like a kitten after and got the woman next doors curtains twitching the nosey sod

[dugong]

C4 doesn't get mithered a lot, despite it being slower than tectonic drift. 

I knew a bloke with a 205 GTI that got tailgated quite a bit. That stopped when he fitted an Mi16 into it. Many VAG pilots tried their luck and failed. He did get tailed by another 205 GTI once though, which also had an Mi16 under the bonnet. I don't know what this means. 

[Rusty_Rocket]

I get 'tailgated' a lot in my 106 van.  I simply wave them past while they enjoy* the chip-fat fumes from my 16 year old exhaust 

[Cavcraft]

It's great on single carriage roads, just slow down a bit and let everyone possible out of side roads in front of you.