The grumpy thread

[Jim Bell]

Yeah, it could be a car.

Or a computer.

[Junkman]

Or life.

[vulgalour]

Or a man's bare arms on television.  Oh, the huge manatee!

[Lord Sterling]

Well, I've applied for a load of jobs and sent CVs to a load of agencies but have, so far, heard nowt back. I'm too desperate for work, but it would be nice to get back into work again 

[Jim Bell]

The US has the right to bare arms.

That's why Junkman HQ is situated elsewhere.

[overrun]

Yeah, it could be a car.

Or a computer.

Or a car with a computer.

The workshop manuals etc refer to my Escort's ECU as a computer. #amusing

[The Moog]

Missus has found out woman next door has got a new (3 year old) car that has got free tax. cue lots of questions about why we have to pay for tax.

 

I tried the logic route but she doesn't get that a 5 year old car will cost £££ to buy, have to pay for servicing etc. She is an accountant. I give up.

 

 

[Station]

'sold' the Impreza on ebay.

 

http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/171145169639?ssPageName=STRK:MESOX:IT&_trksid=p3984.m1561.l2649

 

I don't know how I could make it any clearer that I didn't want any bell ends bidding on it and not turning up.

 

The car had been bidded by someone with Impreza in their name (although it was spelt 'Imprezza'), who typically asked the reserve. Then in the last dying minutes, someone with 2 feedback, one of which was on an Escort RS Turbo saying 'timewaster, bids on cars and then doesn't turn up etc'.

I think I'm going to have to yet again relist the (f*cking) car. I've requested communication, and a 100 pound deposit (as stated in the auction), but not heard anything back yet (four hours later).

I have his address and phone number also. I could be completely wrong ... I hope so!

[Station]

And another thing.

 

I spent £20 on gas on a gas card.

 

All year I have decided hot water was a luxury I could do without, thus I have not had heating over summer, or hot water.

 

Okay so back to my £20... sticks it in the meter £13.05 for debt... 95p for emergency credit so I got £6 of (fucking stupid) gas for my £20.

 

It appears just having the meter costs money each month so over summer my clever* budgeting idea actually leaves me in £60 worth of debt come October when I need to heat my home.

 

This is also fundamentally wrong. If I could find the person responsible, the CEO or whatever at Scottish Power who decides this is okay to do to people, on morality alone I could justify hanging him.

 

 

I did this, didn't need hot water through the summer as I had an electric shower. I got a new card and paid a huge amount of debt that belonged to someone else. Phoned British Gas up, they said they had sorted it and sent me a new card out. Six months later I got to put the card in (I had to top it up to get the debt removed). 19 pounds of debt owed! These people are clueless. I'm going to have to ring up again and get them to do it properly this time.

You don't owe any debt on the meter - if it's saying you owe debt and you don't have arrears on your bills, phone them up! Also get the meter removed as it costs more.

[beko1987]

Just typed this into the 17 thread, then realised it was a general grump so switched to here:

 

I had a polo full of cunts next to me on the m40 yesterday evening on the way home. I was pottering in the inside lane at 65ish as always, they came up along side, and gave me the finger. Once I'd checked that I didnt know them I gave them it back. They then carried on fingering me, accelerating backwards and forwards next to me, then sped up and went infront of me, then started brake testing me. Fuck this I thought, looked behind to a clear m40, and went straight to L3, the polo full of twats going to l2. I then spy a lorry infront of me in l2 'overtaking' another one, and cars coming up behind me (I'm only doing 70 still).

 

Polo is alongside me, trying to get infront. He starts to accellerate to get ahead of me before he has to brake, so I unleashed the XM and with one last wanker sign from me (immature, moi?) fucked off, leaving him doing 56mph behind a lorry, with a stream of cars doing 80+ in l3 which I had made bunch up for this very reason. Wasnt too far from home so did illegal speeds up and off the ramp so he didnt see where I went, as I didnt fancy a group of dicks trying it on outside my house.

 

Was something about 17 year olds in there but I'm so angry again after typing that I'm off for a rolly grrrrrrr

 

Ah that was it, why do 17 year olds in a 4 up 1.2l polo think they can take on someone in a 1 up 2l turbo with half a tank of fuel they dont give a fuck about at that moment in time? Kids today etc...

[SambaS]

Could have tapped their rear quarter and caused them to spin out... that would make them think twice. If they lived. Would have to be a fairly hard shove so you would sustain a bit of damage. Practice makes perfect etc.

[beko1987]

Sort of like twat pool? If front aprons for XM's werent unobtanium I may have considered it, but being a normally peaceful, tax paying citizen with no criminal record I'd probably get fucked over for it...

[SambaS]

Yep... you would have learned everyone who wasn't following at a safe distance a lesson too. I think you've missed a huge educational opportunity there.

[Lankytim]

I have a spare XM nose I would have donated had you decided to use the back of their polo as a crumple zone.

[HillmanImp]

They are for your hands! Fuck me. Now i feel stupid. I was wondering why these new urinals were covering me and everyone around me in piss.

[Richard]

They do leave your cock nice and dry though.

[twosmoke300]

Fucking windburnt too!

[chaseracer]

I have a spare XM nose I would have donated had you decided to use the back of their polo as a crumple zone.

I've got three. Practise away, Beko...

[beko1987]

Ffs! Ok, will endeavour to get into some sort of twattery induced educational road incident during the week and report back!

[bub2006]

That's the spirit. Take one for the team. I get a lot of twattish taxi drivers on a Saturday night when delivering takeaway. Just pull out without looking,stop in middle of road with no signals.

[cort16]

I would have chimped them.

[purplebargeken]

Well thank you both Polski neighbours. LH side leave the dog outside whilst it howls it's ears off in frustration, RH side decide that 00.30hrs is really the best time to play and sing with their 2 year old. It's now 01.20hrs and I am downstairs and wiiiiide awake. Fucking arsehole cunts. I am starting to hate living in 'multi-cultural' London. More like multi-cuntural tbh.

 

Will now watch Homeland S2 until my eyelids droop. Wonderful.

[overrun]

The Walking Dead clashed.

 

F

M

L

[meggersdog]

To coin a Bricktop phrase

"I facking hate pikeys"

 

Got a little Pug 106 on Gumtree for three hundred quid.

Phonecall this morning sounds forin, nothing wrong with that so I give him my address.Three and a half hours later (just as I'm about to go out) he turns up.Not an east european as expected but a mumbling,stinky pikey.Oh well never mind.

Before I know it I'm stood at the side of the road with his car keys and he's test driving my car.Seems to have been gone ages but I can hear someone around the corner pulling away in third? and riding the clutch.Sure enough the little Pug comes round the corner with smoke billowing out the side of it and I can smell the burning clutch from 50 yards away.

I don't usually swear at potential customers but I asked this chump "what the fuck have you done to my car?"

He replied the clutch was knackered. I told him I'd heard him pulling away in third and he'd caused the problem,why knacker someone else's car? "well I don't want a car where the clutch has gone" "I'll give you fifty quid for it" he said.

I handed him his keys,grabbed mine and told him the best thing he could do was to get back in his car and fuck off.There was a bit of mumbling and stuttering so I repeated my instructions and said I'm not dealing with him.I told him to f...off about five times before he got the message.

The car seems fine now but the smell is still lingering.He's phoned three times since so I had to switch my phone off.

Why do that to someone else's car ?

[HillmanImp]

What a cock.

[Station]

What a tool! Maybe knackering it to get the price down?

[retrogeezer]

so he offered you money for a car he didn't want. LOL.  

 

I don't think I would let anyone I didn't know drive off in a car on their own, why didn't you just go with him? If it was the smell I would have said it was no longer for sale anyway.

[meggersdog]

He jumped in the car and before I could get in he was gone.Our estate is just a square with 30 houses on each street so when I said I'd go with him he said "I'll just take it round the block" and was off down the street leaving me stood there.I'd got the V5 and spare keys in one hand and the key to his scabby 07 plate vectra in the other.He didn't sound like a pikey on the phone because if he did I would have said the car was sold.There are a lot of them around here and you cannot deal with them because most are just twats like him.

[HillmanImp]

Just been outbid on the car I wanted

 

http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/citroen-visa-1-0e-leader-mot-/321228514391

 

 

My highest bid was £370. Oh well, back to searching. After a trip to the pub with Mrs Imp who is probably secretly pleased she would not have to be driven around in that.

[trigger]

That Visa's still doing the rounds, I remember it being listed last year for £800ish and looking mint, then it was up again by another seller after being crashed and now here it is again.