The grumpy thread

[eddyramrod]

I think the X1/9 has a leak from the fuel tank, I'm finding yellow stains in the white gravel where I park it. Bugger.

[fiatdaft]

[M'coli]

I think the X1/9 has a leak from the fuel tank, I'm finding yellow stains in the white gravel where I park it. Bugger.

I'm going to assume the stains aren't close to the wheels and hence aren't dog piss? I thought my second Metro had decided to leak hydrolastic fluid in a carpark at Arthur's Seat in Edinburgh until I sniffed it...

[Negative Creep]

Roadworks that have blocked the main way into town for about 10 months have just been finished. So what do we get? A bus lane, reduced speed limit, average speed cameras and £19 million spent. Fucking cretins.

 

 

Also ,wiper arms that lift about 2cm from the screen. Why Nissan why?

[retrogeezer]

Also ,wiper arms that lift about 2cm from the screen. Why Nissan why?

 

LOL!! I wondered that about mine, never seen that on any other car - very strange.

[Autoplas]

Anyone who leaves a forum and never goes back due to one user posting some harmless stuff is obviously some sort of double yoker, aren't they ?

[Negative Creep]

Also ,wiper arms that lift about 2cm from the screen. Why Nissan why?

 

LOL!! I wondered that about mine, never seen that on any other car - very strange.

 

 

Only other car I've ever found them on is the 406. I expect the Frogs to make something pointlessly complex, but not the Japs

[eddyramrod]

dog piss?

 

No, she doesn't get where these marks are, and the fuel does seem to go down faster than it should; although you could also attribute that to me driving it flat-to-the-boards most of the time. Ahem.

 

Norm, thanks for the offer, let me see what I can get here....

[retrogeezer]

Those friggin LED 'driving' lights on DS3's.......do they really need to be visible from low flying aircraft?

 

It's like being in Close Encounters when you are out on the roads at night these days.

[Cavcraft]

Excuse my ignorance but is a DS3 a Citroen? Only I pass one almost every day going to work and always make a point of flashing my lights at them and pointing to those stupid LEDs on the front. Sort of hoped that others would do the same and the owner would be so sick of it they'd sell the car.

[cort16]

They probably think your pointing at them because you think they're awrsum. My Audi has them and they serve no purpose other than saying "look at me". At least mine came with the car I've seen a few around here with what looks like pound shop christmas decoration cable tied underneath the lights.

[dollywobbler]

Sadly, the DS3 is a Citroen. It's quite embarrassing to be honest. They call it 'anti-retro' then slap the DS tag on it. Idiots. It's also HUGE, hugely ugly and slightly pointless.

[freebird]

Those wipers that dont move more than 2cms? Add a Clio to the list, infact, id be suprised if loads of moderns dont have the same shite design.

Why all the shite thrown at the DS3? So its got landing lights on the front, so its not REALLY a PROPER DS! Strike a light, at least Shitroen have made an attempt at making something that doesnt look like every other pile of shit out there. You want bland? Avensis, you want Drug dealer? BMW, you want " I detest driving, hate cars and its purely a necessity to own one" you get a Ford.

The whole point of wishing to caress Autoshite is the belief that, at this moment in time, cars are utterly characterless, boring and completely forgettable.

Its no good to anybody, trying to kick a manufacturer in the nads for trying to make a decent fist of offering something that isnt like every other car out there, right?

Fair play to them, within the design remits, costings and safety, they have produced something just a bit different, quirky and not the usual old cack that is offered by 99.99% of manufacturers.

PS: How can you whinge about them if you drive an Audi? Audis are Teutonic w*nk!!!

PPS: No, I dont own a DS3!

[RobT]

Those friggin LED 'driving' lights on DS3's.......do they really need to be visible from low flying aircraft?

 

It's like being in Close Encounters when you are out on the roads at night these days.

 

A few folk in moderns have had the temerity to flash at me recently in the BX, talk about cheek what with their floodlights. Although I grudgingly admit they do have a point as the car is pointing a bit skywards at the moment, got that sinking feeling at the back!

[scaryoldcortina]

DS3....Probably just because of their "anti-retro" and "Say NO (buy an expensive shit car to stand out)" advertising campaing giving lots of forum trolls sandy vaginas. Also because they do look pretty bizzare. I have a theory about modern car design - the designers just take acid and watch "star wars" over and over again. This is why white Nissan Jukes look so much like a Stormtrooper's helmet from the front and also explains why the Audi q7 looks like Jabba the Hut with wheels.

[Pete-M]

All this whining about cars having lights pisses me off. Whether it's Xenons, DRLs, LEDs, LED brake lights, high level LED brake lights, those new-fangled Quartz-Iodine jobs or whatever.

 

LED brake lights make sense as they illuminate a fair bit quicker than ye olde bulbs. Xenon headlamps make sense as they make it a lot easier to see where you're going, it's a more 'natural' light than produced by Halogens and a bloody good idea. DRLs make sense as they're there to BE SEEN and the fact that people are whining about them confirms that they do actually get seen.

 

I'm photophobic so bright light gets me a fair bit more than it affects the average Joe. I don't do bright lights, yet DRL LED's and Xenons don't induce screaming fits and hours of blindness that it appears to bring out in the population of classic car forums. Ok, I don't stare at the bloody things, but the hysteria amongst some of you lot when it comes to a car with decent lighting never fails to confuse me. If the bright light is blinding you, don't stare at it.

 

Are old cars driven exclusively by moths or something?

 

Also, try driving in Czech. By law everything on the road must have its headlights on all the time. If it's being driven, headlights on. Czech Dibble will pull you and fine you hugely if you don't have your lights on. So, for those with an aversion to headlights, don't go to Czech.

 

 

Oh, and I like the DS3. It's the best looking Citroen since the CX.

[dollywobbler]

The DS3 DOES look like everything else though. It's just another blob. A very wide blob.

 

And Pete - I don't know why you get so upset about people getting upset about lights. You can't really tell people that they're wrong to not like bright lights in much the same way that you can't say someone is wrong for getting hay fever. And Czech's hardly new. Scandinavia's been that way for decades. Didn't get fined by the rozzers, but did get flashed at quite severely if forgetting to put the headlamps on. On a sunny day. In July. Feels wasteful but then as auto-headlamps become the norm, people are only going to get worse at putting their lights on themselves. Notable around here that even when it's really REALLY foggy, lots of people don't put any lights on at all. Or might deign to put their sidelights on. Yeah, you're really visible now! Idiots.

[retrogeezer]

Pete, I've nothing against some sort of day running light but those DS3 ones are just ridiculous.

 

And yes, I may be able to see the car with them but the temporary blindness means I may just crash into the bike or pedestrian that I can't see because of the stupidly bright lights on the car coming the other way.

 

PS, you may not find it so much of an issue sitting up high in the Range Rover, most new cars have higher headlights than old motors and the cars themselves sit higher on the road, just look at the door line these days, I feel like I'm in a mini when alongside some stuff. The of course means that much of the beam is straight in my face.

[retrogeezer]

pps, why has the car manufacturing industry suddenly decided the worlds cars need DRL's anyway?? We've managed for the best part of 100 years without them ffs!

[freebird]

The DS3 DOES look like everything else though. It's just another blob. A very wide blob.

I dont get that.

Thats like suggesting that the 2CV, a car you covet, is merely just like a Renault 4, albeit a more asthmatic and doesnt do it any better cousin.

The reality is, its probably not as good as a 4 in a multitude of areas, however what it is bloody good at is getting you noticed when you drive it and gives you the feeling that, with all its idiosyncracies, you own something a bit different to most other people. You may well wax lyrical about its abilities, maybe about its lack of abilities but you will forego all its negatives because its one big dollop of charm and you love em. Isnt that why people bought them instead of 4s? The cars were not physically miles away from each other in design and probably costs were not hugely different so, surely, the Citroen had to sell itself by offering big fold down roofs so you could burn your head in the height of the summer, amazing suspension for going offroad even tho you never would, etc, etc..

Yes, the DS3 IS a blob but its a blob with different bells and whistles and i, for one, can spot one a mile off when i cant tell the difference between a KA/Fiesta/Focus/Mondeo from 100 metres away.

For a mass produced car that was expected to compete with all the other blobs, you cannot honestly say that they havent managed to make it look like a different blob to all the other blobs.

I doubt if blob copying is new,the Hillman Hunter Arrow range looked spookily like the MK2 Cortina. Im sure there are others that aped other competitor models, we just care to think otherwise.

The only problem nowdays is that its far harder for designers to create for creation sake because everything that gets onto the road has to pass the head on collision with a Yak test before anything else is considered.That, obviously, does compromise a designers free hand somewhat.

[dollywobbler]

Not sure I really get your point there. The Renault 4 actually outsold the 2CV, suggesting people opted for four cylinders and a roof ahead of 'charm.' To me, the DS3 looks just like everything else on the roads - albeit with some stunning DRLs and a stupid B post design. Is the DS3 as distinctive as a MINI or Fiat 500? Not in the slightest.

[Cheggers]

I know it's a cop-out, but for me it's too early to pass judgement on the DS3. I hated the Sierra when it was first launched, but as time passed I came to appreciate the design for what it was, rather than simply looking at it as "too different from a Cortina". In the same vein I was really impressed with the Vectra when I fist saw one, but it's now just another piece of bland street furniture...

[freebird]

Not sure I really get your point there. The Renault 4 actually outsold the 2CV, suggesting people opted for four cylinders and a roof ahead of 'charm.' To me, the DS3 looks just like everything else on the roads - albeit with some stunning DRLs and a stupid B post design. Is the DS3 as distinctive as a MINI or Fiat 500? Not in the slightest.

You DO get the point!! The Renault 4 may well have outsold the 2CV just as a Focus will surely outsell the DS3!

Id rather buy a DS3 than a Focus and you decided long ago that the 2CV was the car you really wanted over a 4, infact, cars have come and gone in your fleet but the lil 2CV has been the constant. Its all about WHY you choose what you choose and WHY I see that the DS3 offers something that is different to the ordinary. Its not necessarily a hard headed logical thing , there are loads of cars out there that do it better than a DS3 but people still buy them, maybe because of those silly bloody lights and quirky dashboards, who knows?

Anyway, who is comparing the DS3 to a Mini or Fiat? Im not. the Mini has now ceased to be distinctive because there are so many of them on the roads, the same will happen to the 500, people will get so used to seeing them, their "genius" will be lost in the haze of "familiarity breeds contempt?"

I suppose, if there were still 2.5 million Maxis on the roads the average Autoshite aficionado wouldnt look at it and concede that, actually, it was quite a brilliant design for its day.

Yes, the Mini and Fiat are far more distinctive than the other blobs and they are more distinctive than a DS3, they also have less space in them and offer less practicality than a DS3 so to compare is a bit wrong, i mean, if the Fiat was the same size as the DS3 it would look crap and, as for the Mini, they have already bought out that hideous looking thing which doesnt work......

Essentially, and my original point, is that the DS3 may well be a blob but its a different looking blob and because its a bit different, it will attract buyers who want to drive something "a bit different". Nobody is suggesting that its head and shoulders above its competitors but its just that little bit different in a sort of autoshite way in that it could easily have conformed to Focus blandness but didnt.Stupid lights or not stupid lights, bloody hell, my modern Eurobox has auto lights, auto wipers, built in Sat Nav blah, de blah. Why do you think ive got a 37 year old car sitting in my garage to use when i feel the desire to? ALL modern blobs are IMHO utterly souless things for us to use out of neccessity and not for pleasure. Thats just how i feel about it. The fact that Shitroen has made an attempt to redress that is to be commended. Some feel it hasnt worked and some feel that it has. Those that think it has will consider owning one, those that dont wont. Some people would have considered the 2CV, some would have thought about a 4......................................................

[Justin Case]

The DS3 is nothing more than a cynical marketing exercise based on the somewhat average C3 and aimed at the terminally gullible with more money than sense, who believe that by ticking the options box they are creating a personalised car rather than acting like the sheep that they are. Choosing a coloured roof from the 20 or 30 or 200 choices that Citroen offers still doesn't make you anything more than a sheep

 

To round off my case, holding my nose I give you this example of the target market:

 

Citroën’s DS3 is to appear in the music video for the brand new single ‘Broken Arrow’ by English singer-songwriter and global pop sensation, Pixie Lott. The partnership will be a UK first for vehicle product placement in a music video.

 

Marc Raven, Citroën Communications Director, commented: “Pixie Lott is one of the most talented and successful young performers of our time. We’re thrilled DS3 was chosen to appear in her new video – a happening vehicle for an up and coming artist.â€Â

 

Pixie Lott is a 19-year old multi-award-winning singer-songwriter from London. She rose to fame with her June 2009 debut single ‘Mama Do (Uh Oh, Uh Oh)’, which went straight to number one in the UK charts, Pixie has recently appeared as a guest judge on The X Factor.

 

Girlracer Magazine

Yuk!

 

OK, some of us may laugh at young lads with Corsas with their badly fitted body-kits, but they are at least trying to do something individual, even if their ambition outruns their ability, and one of them is worth 10 DS3 owners

[Mr_Bo11ox]

I'd have a DS3, they look alright to me defo. OK the lights are a bit bright on em, but thats a manageable issue.

[wuvvum]

My main grump with the DS3 and its siblings is that, in conjunction with the removal of the Classic Car Spares section on eBay, it makes it almost impossible to find bits for a proper DS.

[freebird]

The DS3 is nothing more than a cynical marketing exercise based on the somewhat average C3 and aimed at the terminally gullible with more money than sense, who believe that by ticking the options box they are creating a personalised car rather than acting like the sheep that they are. Choosing a coloured roof from the 20 or 30 or 200 choices that Citroen offers still doesn't make you anything more than a sheep

 

To round off my case, holding my nose I give you this example of the target market:

 

Citroën’s DS3 is to appear in the music video for the brand new single ‘Broken Arrow’ by English singer-songwriter and global pop sensation, Pixie Lott. The partnership will be a UK first for vehicle product placement in a music video.

 

Marc Raven, Citroën Communications Director, commented: “Pixie Lott is one of the most talented and successful young performers of our time. We’re thrilled DS3 was chosen to appear in her new video – a happening vehicle for an up and coming artist.â€Â

 

Pixie Lott is a 19-year old multi-award-winning singer-songwriter from London. She rose to fame with her June 2009 debut single ‘Mama Do (Uh Oh, Uh Oh)’, which went straight to number one in the UK charts, Pixie has recently appeared as a guest judge on The X Factor.

 

Girlracer Magazine

Yuk!

 

OK, some of us may laugh at young lads with Corsas with their badly fitted body-kits, but they are at least trying to do something individual, even if their ambition outruns their ability, and one of them is worth 10 DS3 owners

So on that basis you wont be buying anything that is "cynically marketed" right? That means fook all thats advertised on TV between Corrie/Downton Abbey blah de blah, which will mean half the stuff you shove down your throat or wiped your arse with wont be on your next shopping list. All advitisers pay a small fortune for their product placement, why critisise shitroen for doing the same? What, you want them to advertise their cars with Saga or Anusol? Why shouldnt they target a younger market for their product? Why slag off DS3 owners? its their choice surely, to own what they want?

Sheep? Sheep? We are ALL sheep, all Autoshiters are sheep, all congregating in one corner of the WWW field, many shooing away the trappings of modern autodom, comunually loving 70s French shite and lamenting the demise of those little compass balls you used to stick on the windscreen of your dads Corsair.

We are no less sheep than the 1 million owners of Golfs, 10 million consumers of Pepsi or 25 million eaters of Fray bentos corned beef, or summat.

Those Corsa boys? All sheep, all buying the same make, carrying out the same sorts of mods and all congregating on the local retail parks at night to race, wheelspin and be twats...like we all did, didnt we?

Whats going on? Are people no longer allowed to plough their own furrow?

[Minimad5]

W*nker Police in an unmarked Mondeo CDTI (or some such abbreviation)

 

There i was plodding along at a Sat Nav indicated 72 MPH in the pissing rain, when a grey Mondeo flew up behind me - with not even enough room for a Rizla* between my rear and his front bumber.

He continued to tailgate me for atleast 3 or 4 miles, so i indicated right and moved into the middle lane and over took the car in front ..... Mr Mondeo did the same

When he finally passed i jestured my hands to say "What was that all about" , and he just shrugged it off and went about his business (Cue him sitting up the ass of a Bluemotion Polo, then diving across two lanes)

 

Why can an "advanced" driver do what he pleases, whilst other folk get royally fingered for doing something minimal.

 

 

 

 

*Rizla is a rolling paper - http://www.rizla.co.uk/disclaimer/

and range from 20 micrometers upwards

[scaryoldcortina]

Grump 1 - the minibus turned up burnt out half a mile away. This means that it was kids, and the buggers will be back again and again until; they are caught.

 

Grump 2 - Norm may be gone, but Freebird is back. Can I just be the first to say SHUT THE FUCK UP!

 

thanks.

[freebird]

Grump 1 - the minibus turned up burnt out half a mile away. This means that it was kids, and the buggers will be back again and again until; they are caught.

 

Grump 2 - Norm may be gone, but Freebird is back. Can I just be the first to say SHUT THE FUCK UP!

 

thanks.

Why? Im not allowed to air a view on an open site? Am i not saying it on the "Grumpy Old Man/Pendant thread" is it not the place to be grumpy, like you?

You are, indeed the first to say it, you may not be the last, thank fuck for democracy,eh?

Fuck you too, sir.