What makes you grin? Antidote to grumpy thread

[MrDuke]

Daft dog, he's facing the wrong way - fireplace is behind him.

Maybe he's waiting for a special kind of 'present', the dirty little sod.

[alf892]

Sent all the paperwork off to register imported vehicle about a week ago.

 

On Saturday a big envelope comes from DVLA...........ohhh exciting...that was quick........wonder what reg number will be

 

It was a rejection a rejection letter.. Application rejected as when they checked for NOVA with Customs it wasn't on the database. This was despite me enclosing confirmation of NOVA letter with the application.

 

Phoned the DVLA droid who reckoned I needed to check with Customs to make sure they logged it electronically.

 

I check this morning and yes it is logged. And has been since 17th Nov.

 

So now I need to get another cover note as insurance company get grumpy if not registered in 30 days..........and you can't register unless insured. A Catch 22 waiting right there.

 

This is in the Grin thread because when dealing with these officious twunts (DVLA and Ins Co) you have to grin because otherwise they know and then 'help' you even less

[andy18s]

Whilst running over to Chesterfield to retrieve the dogs from kennels last night we stopped off at motorway services.

Starbies sorted we were amused to watch a bean pole skinny runt of a Pakistani lad follow Biffa Bacon out of the lavy, telling anyone who could hear about how the 6 2ish hadn't washed has hands, and was therefore a Dirty feckin bastard.

Man mountain just turned in his heel and popped him and ended up putting through one of the book stands.

[vulgalour]

Xantia has passed!

 

1: Nearside rear brake fluctuating

2: Rear number plate a bit knackered

3: Offside front anti-roll bar linkage has slight play in ball joint

4: Slight bind on rear brakes

 

A sidelight bulb had blown but was replaced free of charge, can't say fairer than that!  All in all, that's something of a success, the hard work paid off and there's little to do to keep it in rude health for a while to come.

[Lord Sterling]

Whilst running over to Chesterfield to retrieve the dogs from kennels last night we stopped off at motorway services.

Starbies sorted we were amused to watch a bean pole skinny runt of a Pakistani lad follow Biffa Bacon out of the lavy, telling anyone who could hear about how the 6 2ish hadn't washed has hands, and was therefore a Dirty feckin bastard.

Man mountain just turned in his heel and popped him and ended up putting through one of the book stands.

Soz fella, but what made you think the beanpole_lad was Pakistani? What's his ethnicity got to do with it?

[fordperv]

Whilst running over to Chesterfield to retrieve the dogs from kennels last night we stopped off at motorway services.

Starbies sorted we were amused to watch a bean pole skinny runt of a Pakistani lad follow Biffa Bacon out of the lavy, telling anyone who could hear about how the 6 2ish hadn't washed has hands, and was therefore a Dirty feckin bastard.

Man mountain just turned in his heel and popped him and ended up putting through one of the book stands.

I think it would be funny whatever the beanpoles colour/ethnicity, sounds like he was a right gobshite

[twosmoke300]

Would have been better if the big lad had wiped his pissy fingers all over his face .

[vulgalour]

Would've been better if people could be relied upon to wash their hands.

[HillmanImp]

I have noticed a chap at work not washing his hands so now make my own drinks as he was on my tea round. 

 

Talking of toilets, I was in this one today:

 

 

For some reason the toilet roll is not actually in the cubicle where you are taking a dump, its outside about 4ft away.

 

The sign says 'Please note that the toilet roll is now available from the dispenser outside the cubicle'.

 

WTF? And look at the security. 

 

WHAT HAS THE WORLD COME TO?

[RobT]

I often wash my hands before taking a piss, as I'd wager my cock is cleaner than the shit hole offices where I work. Someone had shat on the floor of one cubicle and trod it all over the place last week. These are allegedly intelligent, educated people.

[privatewire]

http://www.thefoulmouthedcunt.co.uk

 

Obviously NSFW, but this made me chortle

[Lord Sterling]

Someone had shat on the floor of one cubicle and trod it all over the place last week. These are allegedly intelligent, educated people.

Yeah, it does make you wonder who you're working with.

 

On the bog roll outside cubicle - You can just imagine some employee walking in thier with things on his mind/desperate to unload completely missing the signs. It will happen.

[Alan_Green]

How do you know in advance how much toilet roll you are going to need? In my experience it varies greatly.  

[HillmanImp]

How do you know in advance how much toilet roll you are going to need? In my experience it varies greatly.  

 

I can see the advantage of curling one out into the urinal here though, which was just to the left of me in this photo. You could easily reach over for the toilet roll then.

[vulgalour]

you just unroll as much of it as possible before going in, leave whatever you don't use in the cubicle for the next person.  FIGHT THE SYSTEM!

[HillmanImp]

If I am ever in Kirkgate market again I might go into the toilet reel it out and over the door, securing it to the wall with a bit of tape*. 

 

*I wont do that unless I happen to be there drunk and think its funny

[richardmorris]

I often wash my hands before taking a piss, as I'd wager my cock is cleaner than the shit hole offices where I work. Someone had shat on the floor of one cubicle and trod it all over the place last week. These are allegedly intelligent, educated people.

Those of us working in laboratories wash before and after.

[DS20]

Always wash before (obvs afterwards, too) if you've been cooking with chillis or spice, too. You can haz much pain if you don't.

[320touring]

Babette the Clio 172 is back in the game!

 

https://fuguttycars.wordpress.com/2014/12/22/christmas-clutch-cheeriness-for-the-clio-aka-babette-lives/

[AlabamaShrimp]

They must have a phantom bog roll stealer. I think the bigger question is why did you go to the market? Walked through Leeds one last week and everything seemed proper expensive for tat

[Noel Tidybeard]

i kid you not at the forklift/jobsearch place i used to work the great unwashed would regularly swipe the bog roll and light bulbs, someone even nicked HALF* a bar  of soap

 

*we had to cut it in half as full one kept falling into the sink (small sink)

[cort16]

On car sales memes on Facebook.

 

 

https://www.facebook.com/carsalesmemes

[dave21478]

[vulgalour]

That Citroen is amazing.  It's not good, but I am amazed.

[chaseracer]

There was an E30 done up like a kipper that round here.  It was so shit it made it onto the 'barried' page of Max Wanker or somesuch highbrow literature.

 

In other news, I'm retaxing the 300E.  The mojo is returning... 

[Lord Sterling]

In other news, I'm retaxing the 300E.  The mojo is returning... 

Please say you are bringing it to the next Midlandz New Yearz meet? Our Mercs can have a Mercedes face/off

[Lord Sterling]

I hope this doesn't turn into a grump, but I've put Tinworm Steve's cars up on some of the other more local sales sites that are a bit like Bumtree, but free of charge.

 

I've already had 4 emails from the same person asking if its still for sale (I only put it up on there on Sunday evening, plus there is a phone number on there too) and another chancer wanting to 'swop' a £300 mountain bike for our Rover 45

 

I've been amused/angered so far by the stories put of shiters experiences with the mouthbreathing chancers. At least my number isn't up on there and nor do I have to deal with them.

[320touring]

I hope this doesn't turn into a grump, but I've put Tinworm Steve's cars up on some of the other more local sales sites that are a bit like Bumtree, but free of charge.

 

I've already had 4 emails from the same person asking if its still for sale (I only put it up on there on Sunday evening, plus there is a phone number on there too) and another chancer wanting to 'swop' a £300 mountain bike for our Rover 45

 

I've been amused/angered so far by the stories put of shiters experiences with the mouthbreathing chancers. At least my number isn't up on there and nor do I have to deal with them.

Any gen on the e30?

[John F]

HillmanImp, on 22 Dec 2014 - 7:10 PM, said:

I have noticed a chap at work not washing his hands so now make my own drinks as he was on my tea round. 

 

Talking of toilets, I was in this one today:

 

 

For some reason the toilet roll is not actually in the cubicle where you are taking a dump, its outside about 4ft away.

 

The sign says 'Please note that the toilet roll is now available from the dispenser outside the cubicle'.

 

WTF? And look at the security. 

 

WHAT HAS THE WORLD COME TO?

 

YES INDEED. I can't see a single cock drawn on it.

[DVee8]

Cannonball Run is on ITV4