What makes you grin? Antidote to grumpy thread

[Cavcraft]

Watching aome lardy bint waking round a supermarjet shouting at her little brats and then getting chased by a wasp outside and running with her shopping trolly full tilt into her year old people carrier.

[Lankytim]

BT is running a sort of competition to find out what happens to the feckless characters in their TV ad. The BT forum is full of advice on what should happen next, that and comments on how shit BT is..

 

http://www.vote.bt.com/?s_cid=con_FURL_calls_vote

 

http://community.bt.com/t5/The-Lounge/A ... 023/page/2

[trigger]

Some of the comments are quite funny on that forum, I thought she was going to start playing with herself on the bed when i first saw it!

 

Just had enterprise on the phone to tell me that my courtesy is going to be delivered to me later today, only 3 days late, They said that it should be a new shape Astra, It be interesting to see what they are like.

[pogweasel]

it should be a new shape Astra, It be interesting to see what they are like.

Go and sit in your fridge for an hour or stare at the washing machine for a while, should give you a good idea.

 

Those BT adverts are incredibly annoying, I am glad I am not the only one who dreams up evil outcomes for their characters.

[wuvvum]

This amused me, in a childish kind of a way.

 

[cobblers]

uncanny, that's the demo plate used on all the press photos for Mitsubishi Warriors

[Mike D]

After my grump about plumbling earlier, I am now happy and have a leak free bath and new leak free kitchen tap as well. Go me!!

[warren t claim]

BT is running a sort of competition to find out what happens to the feckless characters in their TV ad. The BT forum is full of advice on what should happen next, that and comments on how shit BT is..

 

http://www.vote.bt.com/?s_cid=con_FURL_calls_vote

 

http://community.bt.com/t5/The-Lounge/A ... 023/page/2

My views on that smug little cocksucker have been well documented in our much missed Celebs We Want To Slap thread.

[Claypole]

Picking the missus up from Birmingham Airport at some godforsaken hour - 23.50 due to Ryan Air taking the cheapest slots to save 50pence but a small matter.

 

See you next week shiters.

 

[Milford Cubicle]

Is she a grey import?

[Guest]

That shirt has an absolutely feeble pun on it.

[scaryoldcortina]

On the way back from the Metrocentre this evening, we followed a WRX imprezza (blue with gold wheels....) through a long 30 zone up to the town. Conor commented on it a fair bit, said the exhaust was "almost" as loud as mine anyway, as we come off the roundabout onto the only bit of duel carriageway in the whole district (0.8 miles of it ) he obligingly uses the inside lane and I pulled out to pass.... which is when he floored it as well. Didn't look too imprezzed when he failed to pull ahead either. Neck and neck we went to about 60 in second gear when he lifted off because his lane was full of bus and roundabout queue. Conor waved at him as we passed.

 

That made me grin.

[The Moog]

Bernard lives.. .thanks to a proper breakdown person. He is into old escorts so quite happy taking apart the dizzy to find it was missing a screw. That plus air leak and she runs again.

 

 

Holidays here we come.

[Lankytim]

Just had this spam drop into my inbox. 1/10 spamming effort.

 

 

Attention; Beneficiary, My names are INSPECTOR WALMSLEY GEOFFREY ROBERT from METROPOLITAN POLICE UK, there is presently a counterclaims on your funds by one MR.JOHN LEWIS, who is presently trying to make us believe that you are deadand even explained that you entered into an agreement with him before your death, to help you in receiving your fund US$ 2,000,000.00 So here comes the big question. Did you sign any Deed of Assignment in favor of ( JOHN LEWIS ),He further claimed that you died on the 24/06/2006 and you have been buried , thereby making him the current beneficiary with his following account details: MR JOHN LEWIS,AC/NUMBER: 6503809428.ROUTING/122006743,B/NAME:Bank Of American ( B.O.A ),ADDRESS:NEW YORK,USA, We shall proceed to issue all payments details to the said Mr. john lewis, if we do not hear from you within the next two working days from today. Thanks INSPECTOR WALMSLEY GEOFFREY ROBERTEmail: [email protected]

I may email them back to let them know I am infact, dead.

[dollywobbler]

Bernard lives.. .thanks to a proper breakdown person. He is into old escorts so quite happy taking apart the dizzy to find it was missing a screw. That plus air leak and she runs again.

 

 

Holidays here we come.

Hoorah! The CX lost a rear indicator this morning, but a play with the connections and that's working. Not entirely happy though as now the tail-light that side has blown. French electrics. Great.

[Pillock]

Just had this spam drop into my inbox. 1/10 spamming effort.

 

 

Chortle. I for one fully believe that the entire UK police force share a disposable email address and will happily get involved in the financial affairs of a dead person

 

I suggest you string them along, 419eater-stylee.

[warren t claim]

Pulled into a distribution centre today at 10.25am. Fantastic! Just in time to put my feet up in my truck and listen to Popmaster. When I hand my paperwork into the glory hole I'm informed that due to 'elf n safety I'm obliged to give them my keys. Company policy. No keys-no unloading. This means I'll have no radio to listen to. FUCKING DISASTER! Then I have a brainwave. Mercedes Benz make trucks so I give the uppity bitch my car keys and toddle back to my (Renault) truck and bask in my small victory.

[Pillock]

http://www.b3ta.com/links/Washing_machi ... ittle_help (skip 50 seconds in for the good bit)

 

and

 

 

have both made me LAUGH OUT LOUD tonight. Both links stoled from the b3ta newsletter.

[pompei]

Fiat 500 passed MoT - no work nor advisories (though my mate did have to sort out some electrics before it went in) Yip!

[Lankytim]

Ive actually got a fully functioning washing machine in the scrap pile to weigh in... Maybe I should chuck a brick into it and destroy it!!!

[pogweasel]

Although that washing machine shit was lolworthy, please don't kill them unneccessarily.

I only say this because ours has spazzed up and I have run out of socks and nearly out of grits.

I have taken it to bits twice and still none the wiser. A man is coming to fix it.

[Lord Sterling]

Someone messaging me on youtube the link to this old Keep Britian Tidy PIF after I posted up a plea for it. Ok its not a very good copy, but its the one PIF I've been wanting to see for a while now.

 

Not much has made me smile for a while as you can probably tell.

[Spottedlaurel]

I could post on the grumpy thread about washing machines, but it's too boring.

 

More pleasingly, mum and stepdad have just turned up with four big boxes of old Nissan and Autodata manuals for me. They're from former Datsun/Nissan dealer Jim Howlett from Sudbury who knew of me through stepdad (who'd bought a number of Datsuns from him over the years and also done odd bits of building work for him). There may be more stuff to come too - excellent!

 

Be great to have a chat with him and see what he remembers about selling them back in the day, as unlike many dealers he obviously has a degree of sentimentality about what he sold (otherwise he wouldn't have remembered about me and bothered passing this stuff on).

 

Also they've turned up with a working CRT TV that a neighbour was about to chuck away - it'll probably last better than the modern JVC which went wrong after two years, the only brand new TV we've ever bought. In the manner of an old set with valves, we have to let it warm up for half an hour...

[Pete-M]

Just cleaning the windows on the Jag, next door neighbour (who's not said anything much to me for the 2 years they've been there, they're the ones who get the V8 burble from the Rovers at 3am..) is backing out of his drive, obviously looking at the Jag.

 

Twatted straight into his wife's car.

 

I had to stop myself from giggling, especially when he pulled back into his driveway, then back out and very nearly twatted it again.

 

He stopped as he was passing, wound down his window, grinned and said "I don't know why she parks it there..."

 

Fair play to the guy, he's just twatted his wife's 58 plate Mazda with his '09 plate Megane and he's still smiling.

[Cavcraft]

Holidays.

Just back from a week away and, despite lack of turbo on the car and the bit in the grumpy thread, it was fucking ace.

Didn't think about work once, lost track of what day was what and spent some much needed chilling time with the missus and kids. Played (and lost at) the GR835T of holiday sports ever (crazy golf), spent shit loads of money on automotive tat in £1 shops and got 300 miles on half a tank of dizzle in the Pisshat.

Even being (almost) forced to watch some nuggets from BGT and X Factor didn't spoil things.

 

Random shite spottings included two very tidy standard Allegros, a yellow special edition (SE6?) Calibra and enough shagged out old Rovers to fill Longbridge fifty times over amongst others.

[Pillock]

it'll probably last better than the modern JVC which went wrong after two years, the only brand new TV we've ever bought. In the manner of an old set with valves, we have to let it warm up for half an hour...

Capacitors in the power supply are bulging at a guess. It's about a quids worth of parts to fix it from Maplin, and they're proper shizzle- none of this surface-mount nonsense so you can fix it with a regular soldering iron.

 

Whip the back off, find the power supply, the top of the capacitors should be perfectly flat. If they're rounded, they're about to pop, swap 'em. Common issue, especially on Samsungs, not that I know anyone who makes a lot of cash buying "dead" Samsungs on eBay and spending a quid and 10 minutes to get them working.....

[brammy777]

Seeing this:

made me smile. Good to see its in good condition still, plus I think theyve replaced the front bumper and had it tidied up. Im so going to get it back, thank god its stayed local. The original dealer sticker has gone though, sadly.

[Pillock]

A Transit??

[sporty-shite]

Just cleaning the windows on the Jag, next door neighbour (who's not said anything much to me for the 2 years they've been there, they're the ones who get the V8 burble from the Rovers at 3am..) is backing out of his drive, obviously looking at the Jag.

 

Twatted straight into his wife's car.

 

I had to stop myself from giggling, especially when he pulled back into his driveway, then back out and very nearly twatted it again.

 

He stopped as he was passing, wound down his window, grinned and said "I don't know why she parks it there..."

 

Fair play to the guy, he's just twatted his wife's 58 plate Mazda with his '09 plate Megane and he's still smiling.

Is this the house next to your drive? That wife looked pretty tidy when I was there the other day

[brammy777]

Hahaha I knew someone would say that. No its actually the 307 SW just behind..

Ive actually seen the Impreza alot recently, the other week it was parked up when I was in a Driving lesson, and I nearly crashed into it just because of pure shock.