What makes you grin? Antidote to grumpy thread

[iainrcz]

Just bought 2 beers to try in Lidl. A quid something a go.

Got to the till and they wouldn't scan.

Geezer finally arrived, still wouldn't scan.

"I'll put them in manually, 99p each ok?"

 

Win.

[andy18s]

Lidl have just introduced the self scan tills here in Bg and as the locals will completely refuse to use any new-fangled technology, it means we can be in and out in minutes without dealing with soap dodging locals literally breathing down your neck...

[andy18s]

[richardmorris]

All of the Alec Guinness tinker tailor series is now on iPlayer. Loads of lovely cars plus a superb drama.

[hairnet]

Lol not used it for a long time and checked it was working

Even for incidental music lol

[IronStar]

1 hour ago, andy18s said:

Lidl have just introduced the self scan tills here in Bg and as the locals will completely refuse to use any new-fangled technology, it means we can be in and out in minutes without dealing with soap dodging locals literally breathing down your neck...

Did they calibrate the scales sensibly? They introduced them here recently, but left no leeway for slight variations in weight, resulting in self checkout screaming at me, bricking itself and calling a shop attendant to unblock it, just for it to repeat 3 items later. Same thing was happening with everyone else around who was using self checkout. I really don’t know how no one ripped one of the monitors out in frustration that day. 
Absolutely awful experience, didn’t try again since. 

[Yoss]

35 minutes ago, richardmorris said:

All of the Alec Guinness tinker tailor series is now on iPlayer. Loads of lovely cars plus a superb drama.

Thanks for the tip off, I'm watching it right now. 

Look, he's in Brno! My favourite city, I'm going back in January. 

[andy18s]

19 hours ago, IronStar said:

Did they calibrate the scales sensibly? They introduced them here recently, but left no leeway for slight variations in weight, resulting in self checkout screaming at me, bricking itself and calling a shop attendant to unblock it, just for it to repeat 3 items later. Same thing was happening with everyone else around who was using self checkout. I really don’t know how no one ripped one of the monitors out in frustration that day. 
Absolutely awful experience, didn’t try again since. 

They seem to work so far.

stick the basket on the left,empty carriers on the left and by the time we've declined all the " do you need another bag.....will you be using lidl ultra to pay.." it's usually calmed down enough to let us proceed.

[808 Estate]

My Wera advent calendar has arrived.

[beko1987]

On 28/10/2024 at 20:49, IronStar said:

Did they calibrate the scales sensibly? They introduced them here recently, but left no leeway for slight variations in weight, resulting in self checkout screaming at me, bricking itself and calling a shop attendant to unblock it, just for it to repeat 3 items later. Same thing was happening with everyone else around who was using self checkout. I really don’t know how no one ripped one of the monitors out in frustration that day. 
Absolutely awful experience, didn’t try again since. 

My sainsburys local is shit for this. Even with doing the above, waiting for the till to give the all clear it's usually 3 or 4 items in before it shits itself and forgets all it's tallied up weights. Heaven forbid you buy a greetings card or other weightless item. 

I take sainsburys bags for life now so at least when it happens and I get a sarky comment from the assistant I can blame their own bags. 

Doesn't help that it's either self serve or the fag counter at our place. I've walked out mid scan before when I've been in a bad mood/time crunch and waiting 5 minutes for assistance. 

I've started declining the shop floor persons request for me to use the self serve now, as do many others which results in them flapping when the queue is at the back of the store. Equally it works the other way and I can skip the queue and go through the self serve if I'm buying things I know will weigh fine. 

The other layer of complication to the above is when I'm paying cash, they only have 3 of the tills set up for it so again, the person they put in place to manage the till queues flaps around waiting for a cash till to be free once they understand why I won't use one of the other ones and keep sending people behind me round to a card till, doing a better job than the staff usually 🙄

[richardmorris]

A high % of the cars disappearing off the track are x1/9s.

 

[cobblers]

The sink in your campervan when it sees you shuffling towards it at 3AM undoing your flies 😂

 

[EspenO]

On 28/10/2024 at 21:49, IronStar said:

Did they calibrate the scales sensibly? They introduced them here recently, but left no leeway for slight variations in weight, resulting in self checkout screaming at me, bricking itself and calling a shop attendant to unblock it, just for it to repeat 3 items later. Same thing was happening with everyone else around who was using self checkout. I really don’t know how no one ripped one of the monitors out in frustration that day. 
Absolutely awful experience, didn’t try again since. 

Self check out with scales and «bagging areas» whatever the fuck they mean by that, is the work of Satan, and I can only hope their earthly inventor will be bunk buddies with Hitler, Fritzl and Netanyahu in the afterlife.

[horriblemercedes]

I prefer the self check outs. Easy to use, problems are very rare and usually I have only a small basket of things to buy, so I'm not stuck in a queue behind someone with a full trolley who's being distracted by screaming children and struggling to find a card in a packed handbag.

Out of choice, I wouldn't use the old style of till now.

[IronStar]

30 minutes ago, EspenO said:

Self check out with scales and «bagging areas» whatever the fuck they mean by that, is the work of Satan, and I can only hope their earthly inventor will be bunk buddies with Hitler, Fritzl and Netanyahu in the afterlife.

They can all get a loop of

*please place the item in the bagging area*

*please remove the item from the bagging area* 

*please return the item to the bagging area* 

*please remove the item from the bagging area* 

*error, calling assistance*

while they’re there.

[hairnet]

i walk into the hotel to check in and having been to the shop first for cake and milk put me bag down and put the donuts on the counter and wait for people in front to do one

lady on the desk

'what are they'

'lemon - was looking for lemon drizzle cake but fail.......would you like one (they werent opened)

yes please - ill have it with me tea later

i open them (box) and as she picks one the icing goes everywhere

all over her hand

i nearly shit meself laughing - i say youll have to eat it before ya tea now

 

 

[Metal Guru]

4 hours ago, beko1987 said:

My sainsburys local is shit for this. Even with doing the above, waiting for the till to give the all clear it's usually 3 or 4 items in before it shits itself and forgets all it's tallied up weights. Heaven forbid you buy a greetings card or other weightless item. 

I take sainsburys bags for life now so at least when it happens and I get a sarky comment from the assistant I can blame their own bags. 

Doesn't help that it's either self serve or the fag counter at our place. I've walked out mid scan before when I've been in a bad mood/time crunch and waiting 5 minutes for assistance. 

I've started declining the shop floor persons request for me to use the self serve now, as do many others which results in them flapping when the queue is at the back of the store. Equally it works the other way and I can skip the queue and go through the self serve if I'm buying things I know will weigh fine. 

The other layer of complication to the above is when I'm paying cash, they only have 3 of the tills set up for it so again, the person they put in place to manage the till queues flaps around waiting for a cash till to be free once they understand why I won't use one of the other ones and keep sending people behind me round to a card till, doing a better job than the staff usually 🙄

The self check outs at our local Asda are so bad they have more people standing there waiting to help than they have on the other tills, where there are always queues.

Our local Lidl removed the self check outs I suspect because they don’t have the staff to sort out similar  problems. 

[Metal Guru]

4 hours ago, richardmorris said:

A high % of the cars disappearing off the track are x1/9s.

 

Most the ‘Ring videos I’ve watched have either Golf GTis understeering into the barriers or BMW pseudo M3s oversteering into them. 

[myglaren]

Always found the Asda ones to be shite but they have been better the last couple of times.  Never a problem with the Aldi and Morrisons self checkouts although I do prefer to use the manned tills wherever I go.  Haven't seen any in Lidl yet although that is my preferred shop.

[richardmorris]

2 hours ago, Metal Guru said:

Most the ‘Ring videos I’ve watched have either Golf GTis understeering into the barriers or BMW pseudo M3s oversteering into them. 

That’s why this one is different. Getting your multimillion £ gullwing or 300sl on the grass is a bit more expensive.

[High Jetter]

9 hours ago, beko1987 said:

My sainsburys local is shit for this. Even with doing the above, waiting for the till to give the all clear it's usually 3 or 4 items in before it shits itself and forgets all it's tallied up weights. Heaven forbid you buy a greetings card or other weightless item. 

I take sainsburys bags for life now so at least when it happens and I get a sarky comment from the assistant I can blame their own bags. 

Doesn't help that it's either self serve or the fag counter at our place. I've walked out mid scan before when I've been in a bad mood/time crunch and waiting 5 minutes for assistance. 

I've started declining the shop floor persons request for me to use the self serve now, as do many others which results in them flapping when the queue is at the back of the store. Equally it works the other way and I can skip the queue and go through the self serve if I'm buying things I know will weigh fine. 

The other layer of complication to the above is when I'm paying cash, they only have 3 of the tills set up for it so again, the person they put in place to manage the till queues flaps around waiting for a cash till to be free once they understand why I won't use one of the other ones and keep sending people behind me round to a card till, doing a better job than the staff usually 🙄

Use the manned checkouts, people want jobs. Complain if long queues, you are the customer

[richardmorris]

[maxxo]

Got the keys for the new house today so that’s a big grin

felt like a blast from the past

ive just lit a pilot light on a boiler!

been a good while since I’ve done that

[Blunderguts]

On 30/10/2024 at 13:14, richardmorris said:

A high % of the cars disappearing off the track are x1/9s.

 

They seem to be pretty good at changing sides. Not sure about the surrendering part though.

[Dick Cheeseburger]

Welcome to Scotland. 

[myglaren]

[jakebullet]

CAKE!!!!!!!!!

[jakebullet]

Hazel's looking out the window service reports somebody doesn't like CND parking his pikey truck blocking in the street.

CND spotted with 4 flat tyres this morning. Bonus lol's that he attempted to flag down a passing police car that obviously ignored him. Bit of a stretch expecting full on CSI investigation of where his air went.

[myglaren]

[Dyslexic Viking]

Cake