What makes you grin? Antidote to grumpy thread

[NorfolkNWeigh]

17 hours ago, outlaw118 said:

SWMBO has just told me that Kelly Brook and Carol Vorderman were on Celeb Bake off thing last night.

The least she can do is piss off out so I can watch it in "peace"....

NSFW OBVS

I saw a it of this and it looks like Kelly eats a lot more cake than she bakes.

I say this as fat fecker myself that likes a fulsome woman, but it was a bit of a shock.

[PhilA]

Spent yesterday evening pulling this to pieces. Got it so now the motor runs the main drum, the letters mostly operate, line feed works.

The carriage is stuck solid though and I'm trying to figure why. May have to really start getting serious with the pulling apart.

It's a complicated bastard though

 

Phil

[Austat]

I found this very amusing. Picking up passengers whilst joyriding too!

[PhilA]

 

Genteel application of hammers and oil. The carriage doesn't move left by itself, the string that pulls it is broken. However, it's doing typewriter style things now which is an improvement.

Should be a nice machine when it's done.

 

Phil

[Wack]

[cobblers]

I'm pretty well tooled up, I've got plenty of stuff and it was all a nuisance round the house, so last year when I got my business unit, literally every single tool went there. We've not go so much as a flipping screwdriver here.

So, this afternoon I fetched a drill driver and a couple of screws home from work to sort out the loose floorboard on the landing. And in reading that sentence alone, 60% of readers know exactly where this is going.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

It was a central heating pipe on the landing. I managed to use brute force to get the board up and put my fingers on the pipe to slow some of the leaking, but I didn't have anything at all to drop the pressure out of the system, let alone do a repair.

So the mrs had to sit on the landing stemming the flow while I took advantage to the very quiet roads to absolutely tear arse it to work and pick up some tools and plumbing bits.

While the living room ceiling hasn't come through yet, it's lath and plaster with 3 layers of plasterboard on it so I suspect the true result of a few gallons of water will take some time to appear.

[High Jetter]

I thought you were a boffin who can sort out multiple electrickery computery komplicated stuff! Am dispointed.

[somewhatfoolish]

27 minutes ago, Wack said:

One for the Emotions in Taxidermy thread I think.

[cobblers]

19 minutes ago, High Jetter said:

I thought you were a boffin who can sort out multiple electrickery computery komplicated stuff! Am dispointed.

I actually installed this central heating system, so I really really should have known better!

[PhilA]

 

Got everything apart from the Magic Margins working. I think they need oil.

 

Edit: Yup, they needed oil.

 

Phil

[Sir Snipes]

21 hours ago, Aston Martin said:

Desperate times for Hartlepool.

 

 

Kinda makes me grumpy that somebody is being paid to tweet this nonsense though....

[timolloyd]

Epic collection thread...https://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/india/mom-rides-1400km-on-scooty-to-get-son-home/articleshow/75074579.cms

[Saabnut]

Day 5 of quarantine in a small hotel room in a cold and wet Stavanger. I think I am coping well with the isolation.

Would have posted earlier but had to go out and round up one of my unicorns after it escaped.

[Skizzer]

5 minutes ago, Saabnut said:

Day 5 of quarantine in a small hotel room in a cold and wet Stavanger. I think I am coping well with the isolation.

Would have posted earlier but had to go out and round up one of my unicorns after it escaped.

Like for the unicorn bit, not for the hotel room isolation. That really, really doesn’t sound like fun.

[Wack]

12 hours ago, somewhatfoolish said:

One for the Emotions in Taxidermy thread I think.

Photoshop more like 

[Wack]

12 hours ago, cobblers said:

I'm pretty well tooled up, I've got plenty of stuff and it was all a nuisance round the house, so last year when I got my business unit, literally every single tool went there. We've not go so much as a flipping screwdriver here.

So, this afternoon I fetched a drill driver and a couple of screws home from work to sort out the loose floorboard on the landing. And in reading that sentence alone, 60% of readers know exactly where this is going.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

It was a central heating pipe on the landing. I managed to use brute force to get the board up and put my fingers on the pipe to slow some of the leaking, but I didn't have anything at all to drop the pressure out of the system, let alone do a repair.

So the mrs had to sit on the landing stemming the flow while I took advantage to the very quiet roads to absolutely tear arse it to work and pick up some tools and plumbing bits.

While the living room ceiling hasn't come through yet, it's lath and plaster with 3 layers of plasterboard on it so I suspect the true result of a few gallons of water will take some time to appear.

I did that with a gas pipe in 1984 , boxed it in , last nail , psssttttt

Fuck, wrong side of the meter too 

An engineer was there in 20 minutes to fix it , he turned it off in the road , sparked up his blow lamp,  offered the solder up to the hole with the blow lamp and 2ft of flame shot out of it 

That woke him up 

[reb]

[hairnet]

props for the kettle

thumbs doon fae nae colour coding of table

[hairnet]

ebay

bought mirrors week and half ago - their thing said deliver weds last week

they turned up hour and half ago

already fitted - just got email off ebay saying theyd been delivered

WTF

[Andyrew]

Nipped outside, noticed a large ish blue and black thing flattened on the road. Wtf is that?

Ohhh, Its one of my check shirts. Must have dropped it last night when I bundled some stuff out of the car. 

It's been well ran over but we are only missing a button, I'll sew a new one on today.  

 

[hairnet]

1 hour ago, Andyrew said:

 

Ohhh, Its one of my check shirts.

 

 

im a lumberjack and i dont care?

def dont care now

 

[reb]

3 hours ago, hairnet said:

props for the kettle

thumbs doon fae nae colour coding of table

I would colour code it but it's actually quite a nice table, I think I might sand it down and refinish it. I know it'll just get minging again eventually, but given it's new to me (£free) it'd be nice to have it feel new, and won't exactly take long. A nice oil finish of some sort.

[mitsisigma01]

Engine or Gearbox oil?

[PhilA]

All up and working properly.

 

Because we are stuck inside. I think Jack held it together quite well, considering.

 

Phil

[hairnet]

think ive watched all the jay leno videos on yootoobe

[hairnet]

10 minutes ago, PhilA said:

All up and working properly.

 

Because we are stuck inside. I think Jack held it together quite well, considering.

 

Phil

where did you find that or did someone ask you to fix it

if yer stuck inside make popsicles or cake

 

[PhilA]

2 minutes ago, hairnet said:

where did you find that or did someone ask you to fix it

if yer stuck inside make popsicles or cake

 

Mine. eBay. Quarantine project!

[somewhatfoolish]

Jack needs a new ribbon. Make it a green one, then you can write complaint letters.

[PhilA]

21 minutes ago, somewhatfoolish said:

Jack needs a new ribbon. Make it a green one, then you can write complaint letters.

That's a ribbon from 1965, that's the last service stamp.

 

Phil

[hairnet]

is there one of them fold over hard cases with it?