What makes you grin? Antidote to grumpy thread

[beko1987]

It goes where it's sold! It's on about 9 places so far. Was an agency that interviewed me, then they sell it to whoever and apparently I get a cut of any profits, will enquire about that next week... the link they gave me now has an expired domain error...

[Tadhg Tiogar]

Just now, beko1987 said:

.... apparently I get a cut of any profits, .....

Ah, the Hoover Acquisition Fund.....

[beko1987]

2 minutes ago, Tadhg Tiogar said:

Ah, the Hoover Acquisition Fund.....

Nah, it'll go to the Kebab Appreciation Society club funds, if I even get that much

[Frogchod]

The Buick was put to work this week on firewood collection duties.

I'll be using it from now on for trailer duties, it's so much easier to reverse a trailer when you can see it. Trailer's usually hitched to my van which is a PITA

because by the time you see the trailer reacting in the mirrors it's usually too late to react.

Kimmi the Shepard is much excited because obviously all those big sticks are for her to chew...

[loserone]

1 hour ago, beko1987 said:

Like a dealer to a junkie...

Think I recognise that one next to your right elbow?

[beko1987]

28 minutes ago, loserone said:

Think I recognise that one next to your right elbow?

Yep you do! 

[beko1987]

Oooh there's a video too! Forgot we filmed that

Infact it was a shitty day, so I had my filming lights set up as their fucking bright and more energy efficient than the house ones... The photo bloke said it was the first time he's ever done this and had someone with some gear! We moved them about as he wanted. 

Not used to all this fame! I'm sure I'll handle it though... 

[loserone]

Good monologue

[puddlethumper]

Hey Beko, as you are now a sleb, when will you be on 'I'm a sleb get me out of here'.

[beko1987]

17 minutes ago, puddlethumper said:

Hey Beko, as you are now a sleb, when will you be on 'I'm a sleb get me out of here'.

Never, I would die... Fucking hate spiders. I'd do take me out though... 

[Wack]

This is going to sound like a joke but I swear it's true 

At a boot sale last weekend a woman had some pills for sale she said were headache tablets, she was about 75

I turned them over and they were viagra !

I had a bit of a chuckle then asked how much some vintage salter balance scales were 

She said , £10 , I don't use them because I don't understand how they work.

So , it is possible to get your brains shagged out.

 

 

[richardmorris]

5 hours ago, Floatylight said:

Our own@beko1987

Sent from my Moto G (5) using Tapatalk
 

Oh how sad I am, that a fabulous, intelligent human is now featured in the daily heil as a weirdo.

[SiC]

1 hour ago, beko1987 said:

Not used to all this fame! I'm sure I'll handle it though... 

Like a Dyson or Henry handle?

[wuvvum]

That's some impressive beardage you've got going on there, Beko.

[xtriple]

Spent a pleasant few hours in the company of Autoshite royalty today, contrary to most people on here, he was really nice!    So nice in fact he has volunteered to transport big wheels for small car to tyre place and then return the old ones. What a nice chap, Seems a shame to abuse the trust of one so young and niave  

Speaking of 'big wheels' had a panic: was checking them over and touching up little chips on the edges etc (because I am an arsehole) and noticed damage on the inside of the wheels, behind the spokes. No corresponding damage on the inside of the wheels and they roll straight and true, couldn't understand it, looks like light angle grinder damage. My thoughts ran instantly to the wheels had been bent and straightened, then brake calupers catching then abuse with the tyre changing machinem allsorts...

Finally twigged just now, it's where stick on wheel weights have been to balance the wheels that have been crudely removed. Panic over  

[beko1987]

I'm on Unilad and in the Metro today! Good Morning Britain want to speak to me too apparently, luckily they didn't call today as i'm busy at work!

I need an agent...

[barmatt]

1 hour ago, beko1987 said:

I'm on Unilad and in the Metro today! Good Morning Britain want to speak to me too apparently, luckily they didn't call today as i'm busy at work!

I need an agent...

You just popped up on my facebook feed from Unilad

Some of the comments are pretty interesting from one lady in particular..

I'm a bit worried by how attractive I think this guy is. ?

But I mean, even without the vacuum cleaner... he's a cutie! The affinity for vacuuming/fixing vacuums is a big plus too, of course, but... 

He actually resemblances Christian Bale quite a bit really. That’s probably it

 

Stalker in the making there mate.   ??

[beko1987]

3 minutes ago, barmatt said:

You just popped up on my facebook feed from Unilad

Some of the comments are pretty interesting from one lady in particular..

I'm a bit worried by how attractive I think this guy is. ?

But I mean, even without the vacuum cleaner... he's a cutie! The affinity for vacuuming/fixing vacuums is a big plus too, of course, but... 

He actually resemblances Christian Bale quite a bit really. That’s probably it

 

Stalker in the making there mate.   ??

I bet she lives in deepest darkest other-side-of the-world knowing my luck...

[barmatt]

1 minute ago, beko1987 said:

I bet she lives in deepest darkest other-side-of the-world knowing my luck...

Texas, so yeah kinda.

[beko1987]

3 minutes ago, barmatt said:

Texas, so yeah kinda.

I'll have to send @hairnet on a reconnaissance mission...

[DeeJay]

Can I have your autograph mister?

[beko1987]

4 minutes ago, DeeJay said:

Can I have your autograph mister?

Won't do you any good, I have a terrible credit rating...

[Tadhg Tiogar]

22 minutes ago, barmatt said:

You just popped up on my facebook feed from Unilad

Some of the comments are pretty interesting from one lady in particular..

I'm a bit worried by how attractive I think this guy is. ?

But I mean, even without the vacuum cleaner... he's a cutie! The affinity for vacuuming/fixing vacuums is a big plus too, of course, but... 

He actually resemblances Christian Bale quite a bit really. That’s probably it

 

Stalker in the making there mate.   ??

You're really cleaning up here. Which is ironic, given that you don't actually like cleaning......

[beko1987]

4 minutes ago, Tadhg Tiogar said:

You're really cleaning up here. Which is ironic, given that you don't actually like cleaning......

That actually came about because the guy doing the interview said "I bet your house is spotless all the time" and I said it wasn't! Still have yesterdays washing up in the sink etc.

Of all the things for them to twist though it could be worse

[Tadhg Tiogar]

12 hours ago, wuvvum said:

That's some impressive beardage you've got going on there, Beko.

 

[beko1987]

Drove home to get working on the car and the flipping bbc have emailed me! 

[Tadhg Tiogar]

Quite a few of us have been going for nationwide coverage recently.....

[willswitchengage]

Saw one of these in a parked car earlier and, yes, I can confirm that you can now RECORD your tailgating and brake-checking antics!!

https://shop.bmw.co.uk/bmw-uk-responsive/en_GB/p/genuine-bmw-parts/all-categories/retrofitting-conversion-accessories/034151-bmw-advanced-car-eye/bmw-advanced-car-eye/PID_99843/

And in typical BMW style

Quote

BMW Advanced Car Eye

2359954

1

£ 220.80

 

[gm]

I took the little mx5 out for a bit of a run this afternoon as it hasn't been used much recently. coming off a roundabout, the engine spluttered and I ground to a halt - I've been playing cam belt roulette and appear to have lost. I popped the hazards on and called the rac, the operator suggested I was in for a bit of a wait, anything up to 90 mins.

I posted my plight on wattsapp and immediately had offers of assistance from respected local shiters loserone (risking leaving his manflu deathbed) and scaryoldcortina

but less than 15 mins later...

bloody good response time, that.

a quick look under the bonnet confirmed the cams weren't turning as I cranked the engine - not a major issue as the mx5 is non interference but mildly annoying.

being a 'race car' the mazda has one of those fabric straps in lieu of a towing eye, the rac guy wasn't keen but hooked his rope up to move the car out of the way of the surprisingly busy roundabout. we stopped along the road to check if all was well, the tow strap seemed to be doing its job so I suggested we just carry on and tow me back to the flat instead of fanning about with the spec lift (which might have been a hassle, the mx being so low)  

so less than an hour from initial breakdown, I was back at the flat with the kettle on, I popped the cam cover off and found the remains of the belt, new parts are on order for fitting next week.

10/10 for Andy from the RAC today, excellent service ! 

[Tamworthbay]

4 hours ago, willswitchengage said:

Saw one of these in a parked car earlier and, yes, I can confirm that you can now RECORD your tailgating and brake-checking antics!!

https://shop.bmw.co.uk/bmw-uk-responsive/en_GB/p/genuine-bmw-parts/all-categories/retrofitting-conversion-accessories/034151-bmw-advanced-car-eye/bmw-advanced-car-eye/PID_99843/

And in typical BMW style

 

At least whoever smashes the window to Nick it will get a good selfie.