Biggest shed you've owned

[Station]

And by 'shed' I don't mean the wooden thing you put in your garden.

 

There was a car dealer on the Wirral called 'Doctor Bob', who sold used cars. The adverts were always truthful, sometimes going to the limits - I remember one advert that went 'Nissan Bluebird, mot'd and taxed, runs and drives. A complete wreck.' I remember lol'ing at that, and I remember it from such a long time ago.

 

Not necessarily the worst car you've had, but what is the absolutely sheddiest of sheds you have owned?

 

[John F]

That would be "Lara, the Eventual Response Verhicle". A Mitsubishi Colt 1.5 GLX reg. no. ER-V 889, in other words, that used to belong to a mate of mine in southern Germany. Lara had been scraped down the central reservation crash barrier on a motorway in Luxemburg when said mate fell asleep at the wheel, utterly ruining the left hand side of the car, and the passenger door lock didn't work, so you had to climb in through the rear hatch. The engine had suspected OMGHGF so you had to drive everywhere with the heating on full, not ideal in a southern German summer with temperatures regularly in excess of 30 °C. Also, Lara consumed at least as much oil as petrol. Once, when following her on my motorbike, I was surprised to find that the weather had turned foggy.The 'fog' turned out to be a thin mist of oil on my visor. That would explain the persistently oily hands you got from climbing in & out of the rear hatch, then...

 

When my mate headed back to Britain, I was given Lara to drive until she died. I got several more months out of the old girl before parking her under a bridge and taking her number plates off (which matey needed to de-register the car). RIP.

[babydriver]

A 1975 Toyota 1600st in chocolate brown and rust, I loved this car and always loved its looks and this was the only one I could afford, It was an import from Jersey and had a funny reg plate consisting of a load of numbers, When it was raining you could see the water spray coming off the front tyres through the holes in the wing and it ended up being that only the bonnet was holding  the front struts as the turrets had gone. I cryed when I had to scrap this car, it was soooo bad it was brill.

[dollywobbler]

Time to roll this shot out again. Yes, there is gaffer tape holding the passenger door closed.

[UmBongo]

Fiat Panda, no question about it.

I think it was an 86 model in black with the collapsible hammock type back seat.

It wasn't even a proper seat, FFS.

Anyway, the final nail in the coffin came one horrible January day when trying to get to and from Glasgow for a football match.

It was losing power on the way along London Road and eventually came to a complete stop.

I was the passenger so I jumped out to push it as the tossers behind were impatiently tooting their horns.

Honestly, you'd think they would be happy to stop and admire a classic piece of shite, but no, not them.

As I jumped out, the door crashed against a passing lamp post, triggering some very nasty language from me.

Somehow we made it to a street - imagine the Bronx around 1975 - off London Road, and we just dumped it and went to watch the game.

Later in the evening, we emerged to find the Panda untouched, and every other car we passed seemed to have been broken into.

How we made it home I don't know, but we did, albeit at speeds of around 20mph as we neared our destination.

I think the calipers were seizing on and off because later a mechanic suggested we hit them with a hammer if the problem continued.

Soon after, the car was sold to a friend of the family who never mentioned any problems, and said it was a great car!

[Pete-M]

Probably RVU151R, a blue Cortina 2.0 Ghia estate that was utterly knackered. It worked, couldn't kill the mechanicals in the thing, but the body was utterly finished on it. How it had an MOT is a complete mystery to me. Everything between the bumpers was spectacularly frilly. The roof behind the rear doors was beginning to sag as there wasn't much holding it up.

I bought it for around £40 and used it to go spectating on the RAC Rally. Bolted four Cibié Super Oscars to the front, shoved a sleeping bag and a duvet in the back and did around 1500 miles in three days in it. 

It didn't handle too well as pretty much every suspension component was either vaguely attached by means of rust or knackered. 

Still, it got me there and back and I flogged the engine (with free car) for £60 on my return.

[Junkman]

That's easy.

It was a 1963 Imperial LeBaron that I used during my frequent visits to the USA back in the dayse and it was stored at a friend's scrapyard when I was not there.

It was 80 shades of black in 130 different grades of gloss (or rather the lack of it) and it had a tangle with a railway locomotive earlier it its life, so the entire right hand side was one big mess, but the doors and windows still worked. All four headlights had a different intensity when switched on, that alone always gave me a chuckle.

Needless to say that barreling down the road in this beast in 1990s America gave you a lot of room to drive, since everybody thought I am a total lunatic and thus steered well clear.

[Rt Hon.Tony Coleman Milne]

Probably a 1960 Mini. It was utterly fucked from arsehole to breakfast time. It was rotten from the glass down and had bits of fridge/bucket/ketle welded it plus that special 'red welding' technique, pissed water in, overheated and had so much end float in the crank that the clutch release arm had been heated ion the middle and bent almost double to engage gears. I used it for 5-6 months of utter misery.

[Lukas]

One of my favorite things to get grumpy about: The 1999 Volvo S80 2.4 I bought in March 2013.

 

 

It left me stranded at the side of the road three times in five month. Every time I drove off in it, I did not know if I will come back in it again or via train. I liked the look of it, the comfort and the engine-note, but sadly it was the most unreliable car I ever had. But by far not the oldest or the one with the highest mileage. After another big drama in July (oil pressure-problems, faulty fuses every time I started it etc.) I sold it to two nice guys from Nigeria. They said it will have to work as a Taxi in Abuja. I hope it has a tough time there!

[Volksy]

Hmm.. So many to choose from....

 

#1 '73 VW Type 2 Camper. My first - and if I wasn't throwing as many mind bending drugs down my neck at the time - should have been my last VW Camper. Horrid thing. Rotten to the core, went through three engines, two rather pricey 1.7 Type 4's which kept running big ends and ruining the cranks, (the last one ended up in me 'doing a Basil Fawlty' at the side of Leeds Ring Road in rush hour traffic. Then I swapped it to a 1600 Type 1, which made it not only unreliable but even more galatially slow. Sliding door fell off, due to the aforementioned rot. Accelerator pedal disappeared through the floor. In freezing weather the brakes would apply themselves as the servo would freeze up, meaning if the engine was running the pedal would suck itself to the floor as if some heavy footed poltergeist had taken control of the braking system. My local recovery firm gave me a 'loyalty' discount when I owned that.

 

#2 '94 Rover 111 GSi. I came by this car in exchange for a pint of Stella in my local pub. Had 11 months ticket on it, but had - surprise surprise - OMGHGF. I was living in Stoke at the time and would regularly commute back to Leeds in it. Motorways were a no no, as put the engine under any kind of strain and it would boil itself dry, pootling about in typical Rover 100 style (think 97 year old headed to the post office) it would be fine. So I used to use the pass over the pennines, as I knew where streams and ditches were when the poor little shit needed refilling with 'coolant'.

I never bothered putting any antifreeze in, so in winter i used to pour boiling water over the engine whilst running it to thaw it out. I called this the 'Mr Frosty' method, as buy the sounds of it the waterpump was making damn fine slushys.

It's final demise came when the head got that warped that a continual jet of 'coolant' would shoot out of the joint whenever it was fired up. That I must add was after six months of abuse.

 

#3 '98 Chrysler Neon 2.0 Auto. An absolutely hateful pile of crap, OMGHGF after a cracked rad, more oil leaks than the Exxon Valdese, will it/wont it electriics, gruff, clonky gearbox and drove about a straight as a hermit crab. Bought for £200, sold for £150 to some muppet on gumtree.

[vulgalour]

Every car I buy/inherit has been a shed, I'm just not sure which was the biggest car.

[hairnet]

28x10

[Mr Livered]

I too have owned several contenders.

 

Probably the sheddiest was a 1985 Saab 900. It was a Tjugofem special edition, I think only about 250 or something were made, so I felt duty-bound not to scrap it. However my ownership of it coincided with a period of jobless poverty, and it was rotten to the core. So to keep it on the road a huge amount of dodgy gaffer-tape bodgery was required - it was quite frankly a death trap.

[Novanick1]

the biggest shed iv ever owned 

[saucedoctor]

This

 

 

 

was a massive pile of crap. I bought it brand new when I was 21. On the 3rd day it spat out all the power steering fluid and had to be recovered home on a flatbed, and then the dealer had to come and get it the next day. Over the next almost 4 years it regularly boked out it's coolant, Frequently it flat refused to start. It was such a pain in the arse, I bought a mark 4 Escort as a spare car!

The Rover's alternator FELL OFF, the back seat burst open at the seams, all by itself, the central locking failed (expensively!) the instruments were barmy and it took an ace mechanic 2 full days to find out why it was misfiring. Oh, and the boot leaked like a sieve.

Utter utter shit. I replaced it with a Mercedes 190E that was 2 years older than the Rover.



 

[Six-cylinder]

_{There have been a few but this one sticks in my mind.}

 

_{A 1972 Fiat 500 before they became ever so fashionable, It dumped me everywhere including the outside lane of the M25 on a busy Saturday Morning. The list was endless but this is what I remember now:}

 

_{Points closed up}

_{Push rod tube oil leak into heater}

_{Broken starter twice}

_{Broken starter cable}

_{Wrong drive shafts}

_{Diff bolt came out and smashed transaxle}

_{Brake spring broke locking wheel}

_{Door lock fell apart}

_{I drilled a hole in the petrol tank fitting a radio}

 

_{I had it 18 months and the only good news was the prices has started to rise by the time I sold it in May 2001 and I got the purchase price plus all the repair costs for it.}

 

[Spiny Norman]

Probably the £110-worth of mostly green '79 Mk1 VW Jetta 1500GLS I had for a couple of months. Easily the most totally fucked car I've ever had, it was massively rusty all over the bodywork and in several crucial areas too, with the outside world being easily visible through several places in the floor and sills. The engine ran on 2 and a half cylinders and used nearly as much oil as petrol. The interior I tried not to look at too closely, or touch with bare skin.

 

It had an odd gear layout where, by careful application of brute force to the linkage underneath, it could function as either a 3 speed (2,3 & 4) plus reverse, or for hill climbing duties, you could have first gear at the expense of reverse. Just enough of the basics worked often enough that I kept it for the couple of months it was needed for and got £50 back from the scrappy when I drove it in.

[Fatchance]

Now that my Bargain-at-£530-04-plate-Rover-75-until-it-needed-£2500-of-sorting-out SEEMS to be behaving at long last, my biggest shed must be the T-reg Rover 620Si I had for a few glorious weeks during summer 2012. Followed by several no so glorious weeks sitting on my drive.

 

Acquired for £300 and the remainder of its "value" gifted to me in part-settlement of a debt - which is a long and complicated story - there began the long and complicated story of its decline. Reeking of cigarette and dog, the front ashtray was unused, though the rear one had been well-used, leading me to assume it was the dog that had smoked. The paintwork was Nightfire metallic red with random spray-can additions, bonuses were the Honda 1.8 and original Rover mats (in the wrong colour) plus a metal AA badge. A relatively happy month of roaming round Scotland ended with it overheating, cured temporarily with 17p bottles of Asda own-brand tap, sorry, mineral water. It finally gave up 3 miles from home and after a day or two to cool down, managed to make it back to my drive where it dropped oil and started to expel the air out of its front tyres. Curiously the metal(?) dust cap of one of the front tyres just would not come off and Edinburgh's worst car dealer/mechanic from Hell, who had sold me this car-shaped object promised to come round to sort it out as part of his unique "after-care" package. A couple of months later I got bored of both waiting and owning this giant novelty paperweight and invited the Kelty scrapman to come to collect it in exchange for 5 fresh £50 notes. Good riddance. If anyone is after a set of beige Rover 600 mats and/or a metal AA badge, do let me know.

[scruff]

A 1974 Series III Land Rover called Katie

 

 

It doesn't look too bad does it?? However... it was run on a budget of slightly less than zero and had several endearing problems. Bought for £750 with a 12 month MOT from Stevie Wonder Autos and broken up 12 months later when I realised the bodywork was the only thing holding the chassis together.

 

The engine was a 2.25 diesel and completely worn out. The injector pump was already adjusted right to the limit and we filed the slots out to get some more travel in a vain attempt to produce less smoke and more power. In winter it just would not start and the van in the background (my dad's) was regularly called on to give me a tow start, not that popular at 4.15am when I was going off for milking. When the alternator packed up I couldn't afford another one but did have another two batteries, so I kept one on charge, one on the motor and one spare in the footwell in case I ran out of electricity, swapping them round every evening. The gearbox jumped out of every gear except top and the transfer lever would not stay in high range, so I wedged a block of wood between the lever and the seat box to keep it in.

 

A few of us decided it would be a good idea to drive it to Billing LAnd Rover show (about 100 miles away) and sleep in a disinfected cattle trailer for the weekend, it got there OK (apart from boiling on the M1 in traffic) but on the show's off-road course the head gasket went!! A quick romp around the stalls and we got a head set and did the job on the campsite while we got drunk. However the engine was definately the worse for wear and a week later the oil light came on while bombing up the A23 at 55mph... I thought, well, it's fucked anyway, let's see how long it lasts. We got the 10 miles to our destination with a real death knock coming from the engine and smoke pouring from everywhere. As usual I was skint but a friend had a unknown 2.25 diesel sat on a pallet which he said I could have. It turned over and had decent compression so I did a marathon overnight engine change, beginning at 4pm and finishing with a test run at 3.35am. This engien was much better if a bit smokey but held 65mph and was a lot better on fuel!! In fact after the Landy died it went on to further good work in another 88.

 

There was a problem with the clutch master cylinder (couldn't afford a new one) which meant you had to occasionally pump the pedal to get the clutch to work. I soon mastered clutchless changes but one day the slave cylinder shat it as well. To pay for the repairs, and a new alternator, I sold the doors (off a 90, god knows where they had come from) for a ridiculous sum and replaced them with some free Series doors with rotten frames and rotten door tops. The drivers' window frame was so bad if you slammed the door the sliding pane came out and smacked you on the side of your head.

 

One door was green and the other red, and with a mate's wedding coming up it needed tidying, so with reckless abandon I spunked £15 on a can of paint and 99p on a pack of brushes and gave it an overnight makeover. It looked pretty good from a few metres away! Unfortunately the end came shortly before the MOT ran out, coming back late one night I hit a speed bump at "speed" and with an almighty crunch one front dumbiron sheared clean off!! I limped it home and parked it up and began using the work's car which was good but not very popular with my grumpy boss. I came into a bit of cash that summer from a will and bought a 90, the old Series III was towed to a mate's yard and a short time later we broke it for parts, when we lifted the chassis onto a trailer for weighing in it snapped in half.

[Micrashed]

The biggest shed turned out to be my newest car, yest despite owning stuff that was held together with gaffer tape, sikkaflex and old cornflake packets the newest car I have owned turned out to be the biggest mechanical bollock ache.

 

Yes its the AUL VOXHOLS R SHIT 2007 Zafira 1.9CDTi

 

in 18 months of ownership it suffered 22 breakdowns ranging from total DPF collapse and  ECU PHAIL to Mystery Limp Home Mode Lamp Of Doom at random times and always when you least want it (like on the way to hospital with a broken collar bone).

The car itself was lovely. Pleasant to drive, reasonable at towing the 'van and seated seven people with room for one of those over large disabled kid prams in the boot too.

 

The nail in its coffin was going into LIMP mode in the middle lane of the M6 whilst towing a tonne and a half of caravan at 70(ish) it was like some invisible bastard ghost had stamped on the brakes with lead diving boots - I had to crawl quite literally off the m-way.

 

The light got extinguished, the car got traded in the next day against the much more reliable* C8.

[fordperv]

the biggest shed ive owned has to be a y reg 2.0 automatic sierra, when i was 18 i needed a cheap car to get me to work as my rover had omghgf, so looked through the local papers bargain motoring section and one advert jumped out a "1982 2.0 sierra 11 month m.o.t 4 month tax" a phone call later i was going to see it, i got there and oh my there was this metallic blue jellymould shaped turd looking back at me but it had 80,000 miles on the clock i fired it up and it ran like a dream, i glanced around it and it was that rotten i jokingly asked the owner if stevie wonder had done the m.o.t wearing welding gauntlets, the m.o.t was that bent it resembled julian clary, the bloke told me to make an offer so i hit him with a heady £50 offer to which he consulted his mrs and she told him to get shut of it, i drove it around it served me well, never broke down it was just a complete rot box, i even managed to pull a good few times while driving it without the help of rohypnol. it was the biggest shed but also the biggest laugh ive had

[HMC]

This may suprise you looking at the photo- the one on the right. A 5 litre tank that would pick the worse possible time to drop a couple of cylinders and rarely would the immense number of gadgets work. On a good day it was immensely quick diven its size. Less of a shed, more of a Barn really.

[Pillock]

My SEAT Leon. 

I have complete and utter faith in the idea that I was stitched up like a sew-yourself-a-kipper kit. There was, I quote, a "slightly leaky injector" when I purchased it, it would kick out a bit of smoke on startup. It also had a dead battery in the keyfob, no stereo and a glowplug issue although it started OK. Rear wiper didn't work, central locking didn't work.

 

Purchased in Lincoln, it made it to Scunthorpe before the smoke was much, much worse. I spent the night in Scunthorpe and started out to work the next morning, where it made it 10 miles down the road before the smoke would put a fire in the Acme Wet Wood Factory to shame. AA attended, diagnosed a blown turbo after 15 seconds and took it to a garage in Gainsborough where I was relieved of £500.

 

Picked it up, it lasted two more days before chucking a big end bearing. AA attended, broke their previous record by declaring it "utterly fucked" within 5 seconds (different wording was used on the report sheet). Towed it home. Purchased engine for £600, Albert Ross attended, did an engine swap on my driveway in an afternoon.

 

Tried to put a stereo in it. Found wiring loom had been attacked by Edward Scissorhands. Tried to change battery in keyfob, found there was simply no way the remote locking would ever work which is why the battery had been removed. Found wiper issue down to fuse, replaced fuse, it blew again. Likewise with central locking, found locking the doors would blow the fuse. Put 20A in place of 5A, fixed. Rear footwells filled with water from unknown source. Glowplug light was found to be EGR system and according to a VAG specialist, "a nightmare".

 

Purchase price £1500.

Repair costs within first two weeks £1200.

[Lord Sterling]

2 of the biggest sheds I've owned are.

 

1987 825 Sterling:

It was probably the rustiest car I've ever owned, the rear sills were made of yet-to-dry wob. The paintwork was chalky, the paintwork on the alloys were starting to fall off (I've never actually owned a car with flawless alloys) the engine was about to implode which I didn't know about until too late (it actually ran fine for a year or so.

 

It was eventually tidied up and looked fairly presentable but it paid me back by expiring in a cloud of white smoke after the head gasket simply gave up (this is a Honda engine)

 

Current 1997 Rover Sterling.

This bloody thing is a real shed, the body was stupidly rusty, the drivers side wing was missing metal around the lip which was filled in, badly, with wob, none of the metal on the sills were original, the rear bumper was rattle canned as was the number plate recess on the boot. The seats are dirty and its very difficult to even try and get rid of half of the crap on it. The exhaust had such a huge hole in it, it sounded like one of those chavved-up Skylines.

 

So far though, the rear bumper has been changed for one which has original, correctly-colored paint on it as has the drivers wing, it has a mostly new exhaust and the wheels have been changed for better conditioned ones so its a little tidier than when I first got it but there are still improvements to be made.

 

It has to be said that despite those cars being utter sheds, I have utterly enjoyed them and was/am very proud to own them.

[D-Dubya]

a 96 seat ibiza. it wasnt even old enough to be called a shed when i got it but boy it was a heap. Seemed alright when i looked at it and drove ok. Lack of a service history should have been a massive flashing warning light... with an almighty klaxon

 

within 4 months of buying it, on the motorway, it decided it piss out its coolant as the head gasket decided it couldnt be arsed to be one anymore. this caused a monumental seize up, mullering two pistons. and warping the head This gets fixed, relieving the wallet of £700 odd.

 

Then, it decides its going to eat oil like its going out of fashion, for the rest of the time I had it.

 

It had a faulty temp sensor which made it impossible to hot start, or even start anytime after it had been up to temp. 14 hours was the usual amount of time to leave before it started. ... until i learned unplugging it started the car, but after up to temp i had to re-attach... running....

 

it suffered from many misfire problems, despite a change of plugs, leads dizzy cap and rotor arm. £100 spent there on parts, and it still missed every so often.

 

Front brakes kept seizing on, despite calliper rebuilds, each time, destroying a set of pads. only time ive ever seen a brake disc glow.

 

The alternator fell off.

 

Shat out its gear linkeage

 

the clutch cable snapped. being winter, i tried to drive it home changing on the revs and starting it in gear at the lights. got two mile from home, and it died.

 

windscreen leaked and leaked onto electrics everytime it rained, usually blowing the interior fan fuse.

 

something was wrong with the suspension so it ate three tyres to baldness in no time.

 

I had the car 3 years, did 40k in it, before part exing it, and the night before the trade in, at 11pm coming home from work..... callipers seized again and it shat out a brake pad.

 

there was more, but i've supressed the memories. i did however once work out that the thing cost me what i paid for it again in repairs, and i should have just bought a £5k car... or the Austin Ambassador i was offered for £350 in hearing aid beige.

[warren t claim]

And by 'shed' I don't mean the wooden thing you put in your garden.

 

There was a car dealer on the Wirral called 'Doctor Bob', who sold used cars. The adverts were always truthful, sometimes going to the limits - I remember one advert that went 'Nissan Bluebird, mot'd and taxed, runs and drives. A complete wreck.' I remember lol'ing at that, and I remember it from such a long time ago.

 

Not necessarily the worst car you've had, but what is the absolutely sheddiest of sheds you have owned?

 

I can remember a few of his ads. One was for an Ital estate that was suitable for keeping chickens in, another said that the Renner 25 he had for sale would talk to you even if your wife won't. He pulled the ads after a complaint when he advertised an ex plod fiesta as fully valeted and no longer full of filth. The man himself died on holiday trying to save a drowning child. Very sad particularly as I'd had a blazing row with him the month before.

[twosmoke300]

52 plate vectra c 2.2dti ex fire brigade.

went like the clappers but had warning lights come up almost every day and went to several garages to get it fixed (used car warranty)

They never did.

 

had terrible hard , harsh suspension and broke 3 springs in 2 months

[Micrashed]

Not a car but a Ped...

 

There was a time when me and Mrs Micrashed were very very strapped for cash so my car was sold and we went from a 2 car family down to a 1 rusty fiesta family and a £90 Tomos Disco moped bought from the Loot.

 

I knew less than nothing about them. This one had no MOT or tax and a bald tyre but did come with a spare.

The tyre changed and 2 stroke oil added (too much) I set off for an MOT which amazingly it passed (though  I had to sit on the bike -18st - to get teh headlight aim anything remotely approaching OK.)

 

Things that were bodged during my ownership:-

Chain - I took 2 links out and still it wasnt tight.,

The sprockets were hideously worn and replaced with ones from a knackered Yamaha - I had to drill them to get them to fit and they were the wrong size so it affected the acceleration / cruising speed.

The brake cable snapped, I "repaired it" with a piece of 240v cable block and indeed that stayed in place for the 12 months I owned the bike.

The fuel tap sprang a leak and pissed away £1.40 worth of unleaded, so was binned and bypassed with copper central heating pipe that I had lying around the garage and some jubilee clips - this lead to a couple of empty tank situations until I got good at working out the milage to dry from filling up.

It used to blow its 6v headlamp bulb with alarming regularity and so had a bicycle lamp strapped to the front for such occasions.

 

Despite this it always started second kick and never let me down.

 

Sold it when the MOT expired for £75.

Happy.

[Faker]

1984 fiesta 1.1L I owned in '90 into '91. Thing was hit 6 times in one year. Piled into the back of a 40 footer while eyeing up a bit of totty! Got it fixed, all new front end but hadn't the money to paint it. Short time later I bumped it into the side of a renny 11, another new wing needed. While driving along a week or two later the near side front strut gave up, the spring seat had rotted and slid down the shock body and caught on the wheel, pulling the car wildly to the left, and taking out a fence post. Another new wing! Started going with a girl who drove a metro city. One evening I was fitting a mountney wheel to it, asked her to pull my car out while I checked the wheel was on straight. She pulled it out of the drive and reversed it straight over a wall! Exhaust, bumper, back panel, axle trailing arms all replaced. Now at this stage the car still hadn't been painted. It was originally silver, but after every tap it got new black panels fitted, intending to paint it at a later stage. It never happened. Anyway I was driving along one night and stopped at a set of lights, a drunk twat behind me in an old style Renault 5 piled into the back of it. Got out in complete disgust to talk to the driver, found he was blocked, took his keys out of the ignition and threw them into a wooded area, then just got back into my car and drove off.. Car was finally killed off when the handbrake cable snapped and it rolled down a very steep hill and ran into a wall, offside 1/4 folded like a Christmas card and smothered the rear wheel. Went for scrap after that. I was never so glad to see the back of it..

 

Back in 2000 I bought an absolute dog of a 309 diesel. 1986 with 150k on it. It was seven shades of red and pink, but It drove like new, and I hammered the shite clean out of it for 2 years. I never put a spanner near it. Locks didn't lock, some windows didnt work, apart from a set of pads and a load of tyres (thing did the best burnouts ever) i put 50k on it. Without doubt it was the best car I ever owned.

[Station]

I can remember a few of his ads. One was for an Ital estate that was suitable for keeping chickens in, another said that the Renner 25 he had for sale would talk to you even if your wife won't. He pulled the ads after a complaint when he advertised an ex plod fiesta as fully valeted and no longer full of filth. The man himself died on holiday trying to save a drowning child. Very sad particularly as I'd had a blazing row with him the month before.

 

 

He lived a few doors down from my mum and dad's house. He had a red Audi Quattro at the time. Didn't know he died saving a kid?!