Wibble

least they missed the Stradivari on the wall

My regular ebay parts combing turned up a real gem, a genuine Maestro filler neck! 
@Marina door handles will tell you that finding these rust-prone BL curios is nigh on impossible, so I put in a snipe bid even though the start price was fairly steep.
It's now arrived and I'm glad to report the description was accurate: used but very solid. I'll be giving it a right good slather of protective coatings before I fit it. 
I'm honestly not sure about the condition of my existing one but in the back of my mind I think I remember it being a bit crumbly. And in the sort of state that taking it off was bound to result in something breaking. 
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Astra news, the sump and block faces have been cleaned up ready for sealant. I did have to spend an unreasonable amount of time and effort to remove the oil filter which had been tightened by a gorilla. Unfortunately its location is not conducive to removal, tucked between the cat and radiator, so there's no 'tool swing' room. In the end I resorted to the time-honoured 'smash a screwdriver through it' technique. Even then it took a few goes to free it. 
PLEASE STOP DOING OIL FILTERS UP TOO TIGHT. 
In the course of this battle the crank sensor took a battering, I think it could be coaxed back to life but a new Meyle one is only £11 so I thought better of it. 
Just waiting for the oil pump to arrive now before I can rebuild it and get it back to Sister Grogee. 
Does anyone have any tips for refilling coolant on Astra G with Z16SE engine? I'm assuming it self-burps? 

I applaud this decision! 

They look spot on! I think you’re definitely doing better having the 5.5J over the 5J rim. That little bit extra width does help. Plus the deeper dish on these looks cooler! 
You just need some centre caps next. An Escort of this age would probably be using the plastic type but the earlier ones were stainless.
 

Got hold of these for £130 with recent, decent tyres. As per @danthecapriman ‘s suggestion they are 5.5j / which allow a slightly meatier tyre (165 section tyres on those purchased) Its currently on 205 section rubber so a bit over tyred for a 1300 crossflow IMO!
Im aiming to sell on the capri laser type ford alloys so hopefully it will end up cost neutral. If you know anyone that wants a set, with decent recent rubber x4 let me know!

I discovered the spotlights were not actually wired in. I also discovered an aa badge in a drawer. So I removed one and added the other…

https://www.facebook.com/marketplace/item/1169012374119418/?ref=browse_tab&referral_code=marketplace_top_picks&referral_story_type=top_picks

Cooorrrrrrrrrr
https://www.autotrader.co.uk/car-details/202404309204347?sort=most-recent&advertising-location=at_cars&page=2&postcode=SN15 4NZ&year-from=1980&year-to=1995&fromsra

https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/326107932786?itmmeta=01HWR6GGHCFXMAF9JF5B7YAFPJ&hash=item4bed8c2872:g:Y3cAAOSww6dmL84o

https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/285836602739?itmmeta=01HWR6GGHB82E11MW9J3Z4TS6N&hash=item428d306d73:g:ZlIAAOSw68VmL~3N

https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/186422442272?itmmeta=01HWR60WG82H8RSSPA5QERVAD4&hash=item2b67a4b920:g:npoAAOSwrJdmMMmZ

https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/145751865259?itmmeta=01HWR60WG80Q40XX6YB231CRQW&hash=item21ef7cf7ab:g:NgcAAOSwL6tmMO4a

There was a 'competition' at the tyre place I worked as to who could get the most Tiger Tokens. One lad was the absolute king, he got thousands of the things somehow.  Often wonder if the Transits we had are still about somewhere, most of them hardly ever saw top gear as we ragged the arse out of them and tried to avoid 5th to burn more fuel.

A couple here today woke up to a Skoda entering the living room.

Reminds me of mine back in the day:

Were these the BP token ones? You wouldn’t believe the amount of this people claim as crystal.

I think a lot of this is the type of road you drive. Three of my cars are early 2000's so keep up with modern traffic no problem. The Landrover however is 1985 so is no ball of fire. Yes, I know is a V8 and drinks fuel like Oliver Reed in a brewery, but when we go away, even with the modern car. [3.0 X Type keeps up with just about anything😁] We chose to take the slow road, minimizing the motorways as much as possible. As to Mini's, well, at my age we all had them. Great fun they handle really well. Yes, they have their faults. None of mine ever had a working fuel gauge and let me tell you, the tank in a mini is tiny. The smell from the petrol container carried in the boot could get a little overpowering. No, you never went without one, because you knew, at some time, you would run out of fuel! If you drive an older car, then my advice would be to take the slower road. Take the roads that these were designed for. You will only drive at giffer speed anyway. Drive down any single carriage way road and be honest, how often do you actually get over 50mph? Not very often I would guess. Mini too small? Get something like a Rover P6. Very smooth and comfortable. Go and try different cars, see what you like, see what you can afford, and see what suits you. 

One thing I would say about older cars is whilst they are shite in a crash, visibility out of the damned things is often better. Those thin pillars that help the car crumple like a wet cardboard box also let you see out easily & maybe avoid a 3 ton Audi wankwagen.

I had to do a lot (and @alf892 will attest) of soul searching and acceptance about driving a Mini about. How that steering column will pierce your chest, smash your ribs, puncture your lungs and leave you dying whilst the rest of the car is wrapped around you like the foil of a kit-kat. I decided, cautiously, that I’d rather live than die old and bored. It wasn’t easy, but you have to make peace with it. 
There are many advantages of a motorbike. Avoidance is, as far as I can work out, a bit easier when your profile is 30’’ wide. You’re also thrown free of impact - and whilst you could be travelling a way, I’d still rather be thrown 30m horizontally than 15m down (ask me how I know). As Sham says, if you push your vision along you give yourself a fighting chance, and it’s simple enough to see who’s on their phone and who’s simply not seen you. 
Ultimately, none of us are getting out alive. Yes, I’d rather my eldest son didn’t have the unenviable task of being asked to turn off my life support - but life is measured by the bit between birth and death. 
Summary: old cars are shit but bring certain rewards. Motorbikes are great when the sun is shining but come with different risks. I don’t want to be 108 years old, eating through a straw looking back on a life of boredom. 

I 'm afraid I won't be revealing any bowel-related statistics due to GDPR concerns (Giant Dump Privacy Regulations)

Totting up the collection poo count final scores. 

A summary of today:
I oversaw the launch of a new software system at work, which I’ve been responsible for overseeing from concept and has taken forever to get to implementation. I’ve had huge anxiety in the run up to this day, and feared failure. It actually went fairly smoothly despite my apprehensions, and I only messaged a bug report to @rob88h by accident once. I’m calling that a result. I came home to find that my mrs has reversed the disco into the Proton, smashing the indicator on the proton and damaging the bodywork of both vehicles. Not ideal, but nobody hurt so not worth worrying about. My Labrador, who at 12 should be old enough to know better, for some reason rammed his head in the hole of his feeding table. In panic he then ran amok with the table still attached, damaging the house and breaking his feeding table in the process. It was a bastard to pull him back out of it and wasn’t enjoyable for him. My father in law and his wife put our kids to bed, cooked us a fantastic dinner and are now filling me with beer and gin. It’s been a bit all over the place today.

Reminds me of mine back in the day: